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MariaJane83 | I am plagued by dreams about my childhood home where my trauma experiences started. Does anyone else have the place of their trauma resurface like this over and over in dreams?
Sometimes the dreams are stressful and scary and seem to be connected with what I’ve experienced...but other times it’s just a regular old dream but it takes place at my childhood home. For example: The dream about work = staff meeting at the childhood home kitchen table.
Has anyone else experienced this? What does this mean?! | 2019-09-20T13:25:33.000Z | d6uvtz | 15 | 24 | ptsd | PTSD and dreams | 0.97 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6uvtz/ptsd_and_dreams/ |
tierannical | I get scared when I even think of practicing proper sleep hygiene because I’ll start thinking about dying or how I’m wasting my time every day etc etc. I have trauma from a near death medical experience, and now I feel like I’m living on borrowed time. How did you personally get yourself to even start on the road to sleeping well? | 2019-09-20T12:12:07.000Z | d6u04e | 9 | 19 | ptsd | How did you get yourself to put your phone down and actually follow sleep hygiene? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6u04e/how_did_you_get_yourself_to_put_your_phone_down/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-20T08:29:44.000Z | d6rwq5 | 1 | 5 | ptsd | Progress in the past two years | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6rwq5/progress_in_the_past_two_years/ |
4DankInhale20 | A social worker advised me to get my blood pressure checked as I have problems in the morning with feeling dizzy and faint. Luckily I had an appointment with a psychiatrist at 7:30 am some days ago and got it checked then. She said 90-60 is really too low for my age and it's no wonder I have trouble in the morning. I shall drink more water and eat lots of salt.
Normally I would drink about 2 liters of water a day and my diet is quite rich in salt already, so I wonder if the low BP could be PTSD related maybe? I will definitely ask for more tests as I really want to change this. | 2019-09-20T08:05:45.000Z | d6rpp5 | 11 | 2 | ptsd | Low blood pressure PTSD related? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6rpp5/low_blood_pressure_ptsd_related/ |
luccalez | I wouldn’t say it’s in the moment but more so the little things that pile up. A lot of smaller things that happen on a day to day bases. Small triggers that I feel like I brushed off, until it’s one tiny thing at the end of the day that makes me explode and lose it. It makes me so feel so weak, small and vulnerable. When other people see me lose it to what seems like a very small thing makes me feel absolutely crazy. Any advice on how to deal with this? | 2019-09-20T07:19:44.000Z | d6rbl3 | 2 | 7 | ptsd | How do you keep from the little things getting to you? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6rbl3/how_do_you_keep_from_the_little_things_getting_to/ |
EyeOfSolace | I am needing severe advice on a friend it’s triggering my ptsd he’s not listening and is being uncooperative | 2019-09-20T06:17:12.000Z | d6qr63 | 1 | 2 | ptsd | Need help and advice | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6qr63/need_help_and_advice/ |
q4clockwork | I can't afford my therapy visits anymore since I lost most of my fulltime hours and now they want me to see a psychiatrist to get my anxiety meds which costs me too much in copays. I have been off meds for over a year and my panic disorder is getting uncontrollable. I have extreme anxiety and get panic attacks often, even with my usual my usual meditation and counting. Does anyone with panic attacks or PTSD use cbd oils to help? Are they any good and is there any suggestions for good brands? I will try anything. | 2019-09-20T06:13:45.000Z | d6qq4t | 6 | 1 | ptsd | CBD oils for PTSD | 0.67 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6qq4t/cbd_oils_for_ptsd/ |
butysmasher | Sometimes my mind runs so fast i just thinking about everything my accident my ex it all just comes at 1 time and i hate it i hate that i have to take pills to stop myself from having a anxiety attack i just wanna delete all memories i really wish u could and start mentally new | 2019-09-20T01:34:35.000Z | d6nr5r | 1 | 3 | ptsd | Just venting(may trigger) | 0.81 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6nr5r/just_ventingmay_trigger/ |
nextstopwilloughbyy | null | 2019-09-20T01:16:45.000Z | d6nj9p | 62 | 448 | ptsd | the thing about childhood trauma is that you don’t realize you went through trauma until someone tells you you went through trauma | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6nj9p/the_thing_about_childhood_trauma_is_that_you_dont/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-20T01:05:44.000Z | d6nejo | 4 | 5 | ptsd | [TW: sexual trauma, minimizing of trauma] I (22F) keep telling myself nothing really happened to me, that I shouldn't be affected like this. But I'm being eaten up inside. | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6nejo/tw_sexual_trauma_minimizing_of_trauma_i_22f_keep/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-20T00:50:40.000Z | d6n7s7 | 5 | 4 | ptsd | PTSD and undiagnosed ADHD until now | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6n7s7/ptsd_and_undiagnosed_adhd_until_now/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-20T00:12:58.000Z | d6mrf4 | 5 | 5 | ptsd | I opened up to a therapist which has caused my nightmares and debilitating panic attacks to resurface. Has this happened to anyone else? | 0.86 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6mrf4/i_opened_up_to_a_therapist_which_has_caused_my/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-19T22:36:48.000Z | d6ljk4 | 2 | 10 | ptsd | Exhausted by mass homicide trauma. | 0.86 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6ljk4/exhausted_by_mass_homicide_trauma/ |
PerfectlyImperfect9 | So trigger warning, post contains mentions of drugs and death of loved one. Negative thoughts.
.
.
.
.
Over a year ago now, July 2018, I was actively using. So was my girlfriend. Some pretty potent stuff, speed and molly myself, her too but she also used smack.
Long story short she was having trouble with her own PTSD and woke me up to talk, I did what I could for her, spending roughly two hours trying to get her to come to bed. In the end she did, but she must of gotten back up after I fell asleep.
I dont fully know what she used, but she was gone the next time I woke up, curled up in the corner of the room, not moving and all I could do was stare and wait to see her take another breath.
It broke me, more than my past traumas already have. I blocked it out for a year. Never called 911. I just left back to my cousin's apartment where I had been staying for the most part. I went on a date a few days later, she was already completely forgotten.
It wasn't until this July, 2019, a week before the anniversary, that it came rushing back. I had been clean for 10 months, and then I do a hookup and use. I go through withdrawal and back to replacing substances with cigarettes. Over the course of the past week I've gone from occasional cigarettes to just getting stoned and smoking half a pack. Seriously been considering finding someone to get marijuana from. I honestly just need to chill the fuck out.
Been hospitalized, lost my apartment, and moved to a room for rent the past week. Started a fulltime group therapy program, and looking to return to work Friday with reduced hours.
I'm just struggling seeing much purpose in living, like I want to self harm but, it'll just hurt later on. So now thinking of drinking, which also won't do me much good tomorrow... just cant seem to get over this... | 2019-09-19T22:36:28.000Z | d6ljep | 5 | 3 | ptsd | Dealing with lost and grief... | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6ljep/dealing_with_lost_and_grief/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-19T20:11:55.000Z | d6jl4j | 3 | 5 | ptsd | relationship advice after sexual assault (TW: SA) | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6jl4j/relationship_advice_after_sexual_assault_tw_sa/ |
norashepard | When my ex-fiancé was emotionally abusing me, sometimes he would say things that hurt a lot about my personality. He would say that my depressive personality was bringing all our friends down and that people complain to him about me behind my back. That I’m too negative, too down, too pessimistic. That at whatever event we were attending, everyone was having fun except me and “everyone noticed” (even when I had been having fun!). That I don’t ever seem happy enough (like smile and laugh I guess?) and people come up to him at parties and ask him, “What’s wrong with *her*? He always commented on my anxiety too and how I overreact and never validated any worry I had and instead tried to make me feel bad about having anxiety at all. Basically he played on my MDD and GAD insecurities pretty bad. The thing is... I think he is right? I am a pretty hopeless-feeling person and I try to hide it socially irl but sometimes it comes out. I have a very negative self-perception and feel guilt and shame about any little thing I do wrong or that reflects poorly on me. I worry a lot about my performance in certain situations, or that I will fail, and need constant reassurance that I am doing “ok,” and if there’s no one I can trust enough to reassure me (because it reveals weakness), I will ruminate forever on it. If I fail at something important to me, I will more deeply embrace self-destructive behavior as some kind of punishment, as some kind of acceptance that I am here to be used and thrown away. So yeah, I am a pessimist and everyone can see that, but I try not to be too negative with my irl friends. However, I think I am frustrating both my therapist and my online friends by sharing my negative self-perception so much, by not checking it the way I try to do with irl friends, though maybe I am not doing as well hiding it irl as I think. Idk. I just have a lot of bad feelings about myself and the world. But when I think about him being “right” about me, I feel like crying. Then I think maybe he didn’t abuse me after all, because if I really am as awful a person to be around as he said, I feel un-validated. Does any of this make sense????? Even this post is proving him right. | 2019-09-19T19:54:54.000Z | d6jcta | 3 | 4 | ptsd | I think my abuser was right about me. | 0.84 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6jcta/i_think_my_abuser_was_right_about_me/ |
ssjAWSUM | Whether I'm in the car with my girlfriend of 7 years, or among coworkers, I get anxious and make jokes, silly comments, or dumb observations. It has to be annoying people, regardless of the chuckles and smiles. I'm medicated with Seroquel, Zoloft, Adderall, buspirone, and some more I can't remember. Any advice? | 2019-09-19T19:37:18.000Z | d6j444 | 1 | 3 | ptsd | I can't stand silence when I'm with people. To be honest I'm annoying myself, so I have to be annoying others as well. How can I stay quiet? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6j444/i_cant_stand_silence_when_im_with_people_to_be/ |
[deleted] | [removed] | 2019-09-19T19:33:21.000Z | d6j20s | 0 | 1 | ptsd | Hey friends! This walk is quickly approaching!Do you like hanging out with AWESOME people and supporting a great event? We would love to get as many people involved to help fight the stigma against suicide. Please feel free to join or donate! | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6j20s/hey_friends_this_walk_is_quickly_approachingdo/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-19T18:41:21.000Z | d6ic54 | 5 | 1 | ptsd | Should I try applying for disability or is it better to struggle through a routine? (TW: rape) | 0.67 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6ic54/should_i_try_applying_for_disability_or_is_it/ |
dddulcie | I told my therapist I’m emotionally constipated 😂
All jokes aside, this sucks. I’m blocked again. It’s stuffed again. I don’t know why, I don’t want it to be, but it is. I hate how heavy this feeling is, like I’m walking around in chains. I’m depressed when I’m blocking. I don’t want to be blocking.
What are some reasons we re-block/repress, and any advice as to how I can feel and release some of these deeper emotions again? I felt so free when I could be sad and could cry and grieve the trauma. Now I just feel depressed and resentful and can’t feel anything else.
Please help me unblock. | 2019-09-19T18:02:07.000Z | d6hsi6 | 21 | 85 | ptsd | Anyone else ever slip back into blocking/repressing the trauma, or at least the emotions of it? | 0.99 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6hsi6/anyone_else_ever_slip_back_into/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-19T16:44:41.000Z | d6gpoh | 0 | 3 | ptsd | the people that have hurt me have great lives now and I envy them | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6gpoh/the_people_that_have_hurt_me_have_great_lives_now/ |
checkersweater | hi im new and also got diagnosed w ptsd a month or two ago, ive had it for a very long time at this point with constant panic/anxiety attacks and avoidance and ive come to realize its made me unable to be an adequate romantic partner so far ive had 2 like serious relationships and both of my exes have both described me as emotionally draining to them, ofc i took it to heart to try and work on it and thought i was doing fine and my recent ex(#2) it at least felt like we were communicating but it turns out she was holding back on saying or didnt realize how draining i was until recently.
i just honestly feel like im broken as a person and after childhood conditioning that im evil manipulative and twisted from my parents and older siblings alike i feel like ive emotionally scarred my exes and feel like i have to be alone and that my emotional burdens are now going to spread to my friends who i confide with and im going to lose them all as well. ive been crying for 3 days straight besides having to hold it together for work, i just want to be a good person.
i just feel rly alone and wonder if any one has felt similar and how to have patience and like not become.. an emotional burden like i am.. i did some more reading and it might be to do w fear of abandonment from emotional neglect? i am going to therapy but still figuring it out i just want to not feel alone on this
edit: sorry i forgot to mention i am a 20yr old lesbian, just for more context to my situation! | 2019-09-19T10:49:28.000Z | d6cabp | 7 | 5 | ptsd | feel helpless with interpersonal relationships | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6cabp/feel_helpless_with_interpersonal_relationships/ |
slytherinyourinbox | I'm new to this sub, so I apologize if this has already been discussed. I was diagnosed with PTSD about 10+ years ago. I've always done a combination of individual outpatient therapy with medication as treatment, but recently I tried inpatient therapy.
The hospital psychiatrist prescribed me what I can only describe as a miracle drug. Like some of you, I struggle to sleep. I can go 3+ days without sleeping, then crash for 10 hours. Then when I do sleep, I always have really vivid nightmares (usually flashbacks to my PTSD triggering event).
On this new drug, however, I'm either not dreaming at all or my dreams are vivid but never "bad." I've had a few where I knew normally I would wake up feeling scared or uncomfortable, but when I wake up I feel completely rested and secure/comfortable.
As we all know, no drug works for everyone. Also, no drug should ever be used without a frank discussion with your psychiatrist. However, I wanted to share with others who may be struggling with similar symptoms so they could discuss with their psychiatrists, too.
The drug is called Minipress (brand name) or Prazosin (generic name). Fair warning: depending on how you look it up, the drug will appear as treatment for hypertension. The prescription for PTSD patients is a more recent off label use.
EDIT: spelling and wording | 2019-09-19T10:43:08.000Z | d6c8an | 16 | 10 | ptsd | Miracle Drug for Nightmares/Flashbacks | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6c8an/miracle_drug_for_nightmaresflashbacks/ |
shroomsnsuch | Its been a hard, long year of tiring, snails-pace progress of becoming happier. I still have bad days, most of mine arent great. Even though my paranoia is still very much intense, and I dont leave the house very often, Im finding that Im in such a different mindset from when I first left my abuser. Today, I baked some bread, brushed my teeth, and worked on my botanic self-study. Made myself lunch and dinner, and stayed active. I didnt finish cleaning my kitchen, I cried a lot, and spent more time watching YouTube than I should have. Im not even an adult yet but I feel like Ive learnt a lot of grown up sorts of lessons.
My days arent perfect, but there were more happy moments today than there was a year ago.
I hope everyone here takes every little step in the right direction, towards happiness, with a pat on the back. I understand how hard it is and hope you have some happy times soon. | 2019-09-19T08:46:37.000Z | d6b8a5 | 12 | 41 | ptsd | A Year Since I Developed PTSD | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6b8a5/a_year_since_i_developed_ptsd/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-19T06:25:42.000Z | d6a26q | 0 | 4 | ptsd | New post/first post here. (NSFW-potential trigger, warning) | 0.76 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6a26q/new_postfirst_post_here_nsfwpotential_trigger/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-19T06:05:26.000Z | d69vtp | 6 | 7 | ptsd | Today is the 2 year anniversary of the worst day of my life (possible TW - workplace accident/death) | 0.9 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d69vtp/today_is_the_2_year_anniversary_of_the_worst_day/ |
Str3ssT3std | I've always had nightmares, so much so that I usually brush them off as "stress dreams". The other night I kept my poor wife up for several hours because she was trying to hold & console me as I was sobbing loudly & crying in my sleep (she couldn't wake me up). She said she'd only heard me like that when my Dad died a few years ago, but I was always awake then. It clicked in my head today that 3-5 times a week for the last several years I wake up in the morning with tears running down my face but I feel fine so figured I was just having some kind of watery-eye irritation thing & never gave it much thought until this week's sobbing incident. Anybody have this? Thoughts? | 2019-09-19T04:57:52.000Z | d6996r | 28 | 16 | ptsd | Crying in your sleep? DAE | 0.95 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d6996r/crying_in_your_sleep_dae/ |
832Squiddy | I wanna try to keep this sorta short. I’m a 25 year old female and strictly doing college right now. I haven’t been suicidal or had any of the red flag symptoms of depression, except sleeping in ridiculous amounts.
I feel like a walking zombie most weeks unless I get 12 hours of sleep. And sometimes that just makes the headaches not happen. The other 12 hours is spend int a sleepy daze.
Also, 12 hours has been an achievement. I’m being treat AS IF I have Rheumatoid arthritis with plaquenil. And now I can be up (not awake) for more than 6-8 hours.
For those that get fatigued, how often? How long do you sleep? How attentive are you when you’re awake? | 2019-09-19T04:04:24.000Z | d68qbn | 2 | 2 | ptsd | Extreme fatigue | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d68qbn/extreme_fatigue/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-19T03:16:26.000Z | d687kv | 2 | 6 | ptsd | I've been diagnosed with PTSD but it doesn't feel right (Mention of violence) | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d687kv/ive_been_diagnosed_with_ptsd_but_it_doesnt_feel/ |
lovelypenguin23 | After a recent move, I have had to call into work sick 4 days in the past month, due to crippling anxiety and panic attacks.
I went to therapy yesterday and it brought back so many terrible flashbacks and dreams that I was up all night crying. I simply couldn’t make it to work in the morning.
Has PTSD ever impacted your career like this? I am trying to decide if I should tell my supervisors the truth or continue calling in sick. | 2019-09-19T01:47:28.000Z | d676vt | 8 | 13 | ptsd | Unable to work | 0.9 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d676vt/unable_to_work/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-19T01:27:03.000Z | d66xsh | 3 | 3 | ptsd | when was the last time you felt happy / content. | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d66xsh/when_was_the_last_time_you_felt_happy_content/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-19T01:18:16.000Z | d66u0k | 0 | 1 | ptsd | when was the last time you were happy / content? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d66u0k/when_was_the_last_time_you_were_happy_content/ |
nextstopwilloughbyy | thoughts on Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing and Prolonged Exposure therapy? Which is more effective? Has anyone had success with PE?
I. was about halfway through my prolonged exposure therapy when I had to quit. It was taking too much of a toll on my life and I could not function...I had so many symptoms resurface that hadn’t been present since I was a child, and had some that I never remembered experiencing before. I’m terrified to go back but I know I need to finally deal with this.
I’m just curious what people’s thoughts if they have gone through either treatment so I can decide which therapist to seek out. | 2019-09-19T01:07:41.000Z | d66pgk | 1 | 3 | ptsd | EMDR vs PE | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d66pgk/emdr_vs_pe/ |
habitualharrypotter | I need to break up with my boyfriend. We’ve been together 3 months. It’s really apparent at this point there are red flags that won’t change and I can’t keep ignoring. There have been some incidents with him that have really triggered my PTSD. I don’t think I’m actually unsafe around him, but honestly, I can’t tell what’s my PTSD and what’s an actual threat. (The thing I keep landing on is that he’s a heavy drinker and semi unpredictable when drinking, and there’s a gun at his house.) I know it’s generally the decent thing to break up with someone in person, and I’d like to do the right thing. Can you all help me decipher between an actual threat and just me being to cowardly to do this in person? Thanks all. | 2019-09-19T00:28:49.000Z | d668e3 | 6 | 7 | ptsd | Break up in person or over the phone? I can’t tell what’s a threat and what’s my PTSD. | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d668e3/break_up_in_person_or_over_the_phone_i_cant_tell/ |
ella_strange | I'm really scared I'm having a hard time functioning. i was doing just fine, i was building up self esteem, i found passion in fashion, i was writing again, felt creative, had routines....
then my serotonin just decided to go on vacation. i can barely move, i can barely think. i have to force myself to do pretty much anything. I've been awake since 7a, i finally forced myself to get dressed and get cigarettes around noon, eat a breakfast pancake wrapped sausage. then i just say in bed, telling myself to do something *anything* but it's like i couldn't move.
not lack of motivation so much as paralyzed into inaction. like no matter what i do in gonna fuck it up. i told myself to do something easy, like build a house in my sims game, something that won't cause the sky to fall off i mess it up. but i just looked at the laptop and scrolled through social media without really looking at anything. i finally forced myself to make food after six hours.
and I'm... angry, and hurt. i just found out that more people have broken my trust, left out important information, smeared my name, told lies, etc. I'm afraid to talk to anybody because i don't know who i can trust, don't know what is true. there are two friends that have never broken my trust in the twenty years I've known them, but on the other hand there are people that I've known longer or just as long who did things i never thought their be capable of.
i asked for help, i was scared, and got told i was being toxic, got told to cut out the self pity, but i really just feel like a worthless dick up and things will never get better and i don't know how to work through this. I've got 3 cats to take care of and I'm starting school next week, but i can barely take care of myself. i don't know what to do or what's wrong with me. | 2019-09-18T21:31:10.000Z | d647rg | 0 | 3 | ptsd | anxiety? depression? both? something else? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d647rg/anxiety_depression_both_something_else/ |
HopefulLesbian | I had my first flashback a could of nights ago. It was different than I had expected it to be, but just as scary. I find my case odd, because instead of physically being there, I was there emotionally. I didn't know where I was in reality, only that I was somewhere with my girlfriend. I could hear her but I couldn't respond or react or anything. I didn't know what was going on, except for the memory. I was seeing it through third person. I thought it would be weird because as far as I know, flashbacks are when people are there physically too, reacting to things in "real time." Physically. Is this a different type of flashback? | 2019-09-18T18:45:31.000Z | d627n9 | 2 | 6 | ptsd | I had my first flashback | 0.88 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d627n9/i_had_my_first_flashback/ |
Daud1991 | On mobile so forgive the formatting.
My whole childhood was a big fucked, mushed up ball of trauma, abuse, and neglect. I am the byproduct of all that. I bear the scars of every beating, every method of torture. No idea how to love, care, feel. Every year that passed I lost more and more of myself until I got to where I am. I escaped 2 years ago. Now I'm a husk. I feel like a walking fucking corpse with no direction. Even feeling my heart beat within my chest makes me extremely uncomfortable. I feel nothing but rage, and even that is only sometimes. I shouldn't be alive. My mind is dead but my body lives on, scarred and weary. I may have escaped physically but my brain is a prison that I may never escape from. | 2019-09-18T17:14:32.000Z | d60x1o | 5 | 10 | ptsd | I am dead. I am not alive. (TW: Abuse) | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d60x1o/i_am_dead_i_am_not_alive_tw_abuse/ |
[deleted] | Hi there PTSD community. I'm grateful to you all. You help me feel less alone. I'm looking for advice and a place to rant.
I've been struggling with anxiety and depression my whole life. A couple years ago I was diagnosed PTSD due to childhood trauma. About a year ago I broke down. Quit a well paying job to focus on healing myself. Got a lower stress job, went to biweekly therapy, a new psychiatrist, and changed medications. I was still struggling, but I was doing somewhat better. I thought If I just kept pushing through I would get better. In the last couple months I've had a resurgence of anxiety and depression. It very recently got so bad that I've been unable to work- even at my lower stress job. It made me feel like a failure. Like, I had everything and I gave it up to feel better, but I still feel like this. It's frustrating.
I googled some places that offered inpatient and intensive outpatient therapy. I visited two places and found a 6 week traumatic stress specific Intensive outpatient program that seems like a good fit. Has anyone tried an IOP? Did it help you?
I need to feel better. I want to be happy, stable, and live a full life. Ive been white knuckling my way through, pretending I'm ok just to try to live a normal life. I have hope that this program will help, but I'm scared of what happens if it doesn't. Any support or guidance would be appreciated. | 2019-09-18T12:33:53.000Z | d5x41c | 11 | 4 | ptsd | IOP Intensive outpatient therapy | 0.84 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5x41c/iop_intensive_outpatient_therapy/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-18T06:51:46.000Z | d5txnw | 0 | 9 | ptsd | i’m tired | 0.92 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5txnw/im_tired/ |
dffhjkfsthvxj | Throwaway. It’s a possibly identifiable story so yeah. Sorry this is long.
Trigger warning: sexual harassment, eating disorder
4 1/2 years ago I went throw 4 weeks of hell. I got a job at a small restaurant. I was a dishwasher. I sat in the back and did homework when there were no dishes to be washed. I didn’t mind it. 2 weeks later, I was made waitress after the other one quit. This was when he started.
Background: Dude was in his 50’s, immigrated from Thailand, owned the restaurant, and didn’t speak a lot of English (important detail).
The first time anything suspicious happened was when I came show ready. I’m in a comedy troupe and usually wear red lipstick while performing. So I wore it to work, not thinking much of it. As I entered and grabbed my apron, he looked and me and said, “you need to wear make up like that all the time. Very sexy, get me tips.” I looked at him confused. My first thought was he didn’t 100% understand the word sexy. So I told him I didn’t like him using that word and I do this for shows and that’s it. He said okay and I didn’t think much of it.
Next day I come back for my shift and he asks me why my make up isn’t done the way he told me to do it (aka no lipstick). I told him I only wore it for the show. He told me that I needed to go home and put it on. I said no and the restaurant started filling up. Only waitress, he needed me there.
As I went to leave, he again looked at me and said, “next time, wear lipstick. You look sexy you get me tips.” That time it was weird. I had explained the word the night before. I again expressed I didn’t like him using that word towards me and he said okay.
Called my mom that night. She told me to start keeping a log of when these comments happened. So I did.
It became more than comments, though. Over the next 3 1/2 weeks it was touches on the small of my back, blatantly staring at my boobs, telling me to look sexy for him to get him tips like I was some sort of prostitute, watching me clean the bathrooms and grabbing his crotch while I did. I kept meticulous notes.
Finally, he tried to get physical. He attempted to grab my waist and then my butt as I was taking food to customers. I cried that night to my mom. I couldn’t do it anymore. It was too blatant and too much. I was so scared that he was going to become violent one of these days. Mom told me to walk in and get my paycheck the next day, cash it, and never go back to work. So I did.
None of my roommates thought what was happening was concerning and one told me to just relax, he’s just confused about the language and his culture might be more touchy. They made me feel like my discomfort may be racist. I didn’t know what to do because accusing him of hiding behind the excuse of a language barrier did seem racist. It made me very conflicted. It was the reason I never pressed charges. I did report him to the business bureau though.
Thing is, no one takes me seriously. No one understands this is sexual misconduct. No one understands why I never walk that block of the street anymore, even with my husband who is a large man. I’ve been told to get over it because others have worse trauma. I told my husband to never call me sexy because that word has been ruined for me forever. My councilor has told me to forgive and forget and not let his words effect me.
But they do. I freeze every time I see him. I can’t handle the thought of speaking with him again. I didn’t tell anyone until a few months into the next job I got (fast food joint), I had a panic attack because he walked in the door and the manager at the time (bless her because she saw something was up) replaced me for a moment and then pulled me into the office and had me explain. She never made me interact with him. She could tell he scared me.
It’s been 4 1/2 years and I still have nightmares. I still lose sleep. I still hate him. I relapsed into my eating disorder because of him. I relived trauma from middle school bullying. I lost all confidence I gained in myself. I didn’t want men to touch me. It took my now husband coming into my life to start trying to heal, but the healing is at a stand stilly
I don’t even know why I wrote this. It was just on my mind a lot today and I just feel like I should get over it, but I can’t. The reason I developed my eating disorder was feeling out of control of my body as I went through puberty and that’s what this felt like. He never touched me, but the leers, the comments, the actions, made me feel out of control of my body which led to the relapse. It took a year to get back into recovery. I just feel very heavy today and needed to get this out. Thanks for reading.
(Note: he kept my tips because apparently if you pay minimum wage he thought you could. The Business bureau investigated him over that, not the sexual harassment.) | 2019-09-18T05:41:32.000Z | d5tb0v | 2 | 3 | ptsd | He didn’t touch me, but I’m still scarred. | 0.81 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5tb0v/he_didnt_touch_me_but_im_still_scarred/ |
karpaediem | Hi everyone, it's been over a year now since my abusive relationship ended and there's someone I have feelings for. Because I was pretty certain he had feelings for me too, I decided to tell him and now we are seeing each other. He knows some of my history, so it's completely up to me how and when our relationship advances. Still, it's really scary being so vulnerable with someone after a lot of abuse and there's just not a lot of advice online for how to manage triggers and stuff inside of a romantic relationship. I would love to hear from those of you who have navigated relationships while managing PTSD. | 2019-09-18T05:31:05.000Z | d5t7g1 | 4 | 5 | ptsd | First Relationship After Abuse | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5t7g1/first_relationship_after_abuse/ |
dddulcie | Can’t identify this feeling I’m feeling, lately. Can’t identify a lot of them.
This specific one has been hanging around for over a week. My center chest and throat feel very tight. My forehead and sinuses hurt as well, but only when this feeling rises up again.
UNCLOG ME PLEASE lol but seriously. | 2019-09-18T05:21:39.000Z | d5t4b2 | 3 | 8 | ptsd | Looking for info on emotions and their assigned physical sensation. | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5t4b2/looking_for_info_on_emotions_and_their_assigned/ |
ilostmylenscap | Anytime I’m in an uncomfortable situation I immediately switch into this intense and vivid daydream. It’s almost like a relief when I do. If I’m at a party I’m not enjoying, in class, at work, anywhere that I’m not having fun or feeling comfortable I daydream. It’s so bad that I don’t even hear or notice the things around me. I’ll daydream the entire lecture and miss everything the prof said. I’ll do it at work too, and miss all the orders or things my coworkers say to me. It’s like a defense mechanism almost. I want it to stop because I feel like I’m missing out on a lot of things. I can’t focus on some things. I don’t know if anyone else does this. I’m wondering if this is a form of dissociation, because I used to dissociate a lot, but once I started daydreaming all the time the dissociative episodes sort of stopped. If you do this, how do you deal with it? How do you stop from drifting off? | 2019-09-18T04:59:43.000Z | d5swrf | 4 | 12 | ptsd | Anyone compulsively daydream? | 0.94 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5swrf/anyone_compulsively_daydream/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-18T03:10:22.000Z | d5rs2i | 0 | 1 | ptsd | I feel like a bad person | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5rs2i/i_feel_like_a_bad_person/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-18T02:50:20.000Z | d5rk1a | 2 | 3 | ptsd | Looking for sexual advice [Long] | 0.72 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5rk1a/looking_for_sexual_advice_long/ |
darksunflower97 | Hi idk where to start this post but. I suffer from MDD, PTSD, and Anxiety I am 22 and live with my fiance and child. I have dreams of my abusive past replaying in my head, once in a while. But what got me was two weeks ago. I came out of my bathroom it was dark and I got lost in the hallway in our apartment. It felt like I was being hunted, watched, like I was hiding. My mother was very abusive to me as a child and I would hide in my closet behind piles of stuff like toys, purses, clothes. In a dark closet I would hold my breath, hide behind my stuff till she would go away, so I didn't get beat. I have reoccurring memories when I'm out in public and I start panicking and have to go to the bathroom till I calm down. Or me and my significant other just leave. This has been the first time I've experienced this, is my PTSD getting worse. Also just to inform you our bedroom is like three steps away from our bathroom. As soon as I flipped the switch off the episode happened, I felt like I was frozen, I was scared, I was lost. Please help me. | 2019-09-18T02:49:49.000Z | d5rjtt | 1 | 2 | ptsd | Lost in the hallway | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5rjtt/lost_in_the_hallway/ |
Str3ssT3std | Not really DAE, but I'm wondering if anyone has tried Wilderness Therapy for PTSD/CPTSD? If so, what did you think? Did it help?
Background: My degree is in Outdoor Education, I'm thus qualified to work for or start a Wilderness Therapy program (partnered with qualified therapists & mental health professionals, of course). I've been interested in it a lot more now that I've been diagnosed & in treatment for CPTSD. Most of what I know about it is from academic study that rarely included personal testimonials (good or bad). I did some research looking for employment in my native ID & current state of UT, but these states are poorly regulated in wilderness therapy & unfortunately this has resulted in several tragedies & very bad press (mostly applied to youth with behavioral issues). I've seen some PTSD-specific programs, but a lot of them seem geared towards Vets with PTSD (which is awesome), but I haven't run across much for civilians. Personally, I find the backcountry to be one of the few places that I'm at peace & far removed from my anxieties & other symptoms.
Anyone have any experiences to share? Good, bad, or ugly I'd be interested in hearing about it. I'd even be curious to see if anyone with PTSD/CPTSD would be interested in such a thing. | 2019-09-18T02:46:04.000Z | d5ri82 | 24 | 6 | ptsd | Wilderness Therapy? | 0.88 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5ri82/wilderness_therapy/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-18T02:18:42.000Z | d5r6s8 | 1 | 3 | ptsd | Some feedback | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5r6s8/some_feedback/ |
dddulcie | It feels blocked. Like something needs to come out, but it won’t. Does this happen to anyone else, or do you have advice as to how to just feel it and face it, let it surface? | 2019-09-18T02:18:03.000Z | d5r6is | 4 | 14 | ptsd | Feeling a heaviness lately, always on the verge of tears, but I don’t know what this emotion IS. | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5r6is/feeling_a_heaviness_lately_always_on_the_verge_of/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-18T02:13:56.000Z | d5r4s0 | 0 | 2 | ptsd | I need to talk | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5r4s0/i_need_to_talk/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-18T00:29:40.000Z | d5pv1o | 32 | 136 | ptsd | I died that night. | 0.99 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5pv1o/i_died_that_night/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-17T22:51:49.000Z | d5on1y | 1 | 3 | ptsd | Hypersensitive reflexes? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5on1y/hypersensitive_reflexes/ |
Starfire911 | How do you find a partner you can trust enough to have a relationship with? I am 22 years old haven’t been in a relationship before. People with PTSD need love too. | 2019-09-17T22:42:23.000Z | d5oipo | 4 | 3 | ptsd | How to find a partner | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5oipo/how_to_find_a_partner/ |
yoyoyofoso | I want to hear from you. What is your story. How does living with PTSD affect you in your daily life? What are some things you really struggle with? What have you fou d to be helpful. What kind of support do you require from others? | 2019-09-17T22:06:10.000Z | d5o1d1 | 0 | 1 | ptsd | Tell me your story. | 0.67 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5o1d1/tell_me_your_story/ |
[deleted] | This post was supposed to be a rant.
I was feeling a bit gloomy after a flash-back, but as I kept writing I started to calm down. Hence the change in the tone.
Also, I wanted to point out that what I'm talking about is obviously just a small part of the process of getting back on your feet, but still it felt essential to me. Everyone's experience is different and this is just my personal perspective.
Sorry for my broken English, I hope this can be helpful to someone.
I guess I have improved a lot in the last year.
I really don't want to go back to the hole of despair I was trapped in, but sometimes I get scared I might let myself slip off into it again.
To prevent that, I make sure to bury any thoughts about my past very deep as soon as I sense them arise, of course some of them manage to sneak out and they get back at me in spades.
I still get glimpses of moments I had successfully forgotten about.
It makes me feel like I'm still there, but it happens less and less frequently and every time it gets easier to snap back.
Up until a year ago, I was leading a life that was split in half between the present and the past.
The present seemed to be so dull, as if I were half-asleep, while the past felt so much more real and threatening.
I used to be so angry, I don't know how else to describe it other than it felt like fire was running through my veins. It was the only thing I felt and I couldn't help but cling to it, since it seemed to be my life's sole purpose and sustenance.
I kept reliving the events of my trauma, going through them in my head over and over again. Each time getting angrier and angrier.
I didn't mind it at all, I was actually glad for this blind rage. As if it fueled me.
**START OF TRIGGER WARNING**
I had spent so much time in captivity, fighting tooth and nails to survive, being tortured and raped every single day, not knowing if I would have managed to go on living, or if the time had come for me to be offed.
**END OF TRIGGER WARNING**
After I escaped, ordinary life was simply idle.
Hadn't it been for this anger, I would have just gone numb.
Although comforting, I came to realize that I would have never been able to move forward without letting go of it all, the anger, the constant replay of gruesome scenes in my mind, the pointless questions that would never find any answers.
Things were also getting out of hand, to the point where I involuntarily broke my friend's arm as I was startled by her giving me a hug unexpectedly.
I was horrified at what I had done.
I'm a petite girl but I've been fighting professionally for a long time and I couldn't bear the thought of harming someone whose only fault was getting caught between my messed up brain and me.
It's a hard process to forget about the abuse I had been through as a child and then again as an adult, but I'm managing and it does get easier.
I had never thought it to be true, but time really does heal all wounds.
But most importantly it's the people you love. Keep them close. Even if you feel the need to cut everybody off and confine yourself in your pain, don't. Don't let this trauma induced sentiment prevail.
It's not what you or your loved ones need.
The ones we care about are the only thing that keeps us grounded to reality, to the present.
You can take small steps, there's no rush, you don't have to let everyone in on everything you are feeling unless you want to. Just try, as difficult as it is, to be open to their affection.
Being passionate about something is hard after you have survived trauma and readjusting to everyday life is particularly disorienting when you don't have a purpose, you just feel hollow. A good place to start is making it a point to be able to take care of the people you love. Having to be someone your dear ones can rely on, eventually makes you get back on track and you are going to become even stronger than you were before.
It's ironic how being a survivor makes you feel so dead inside, it might feel like you have lost all control over your own body and mind.
But please know this kind of feelings are only temporary. You have gone through a nightmare and made it out alive. You will overcome these feelings as well.
You won't have to look back at the person you were before in sorrow, you are growing to become someone you will learn to love.
You will have suffered greatly and still been able to pull yourself back up, you can accomplish anything you put your mind to.
Life only gets better and better from here, it's tough but so are you. | 2019-09-17T21:50:47.000Z | d5ntya | 0 | 3 | ptsd | Things get easier. My experience of getting better. Brief mention of abuse without getting into details (also start and end are pointed out) | 0.81 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5ntya/things_get_easier_my_experience_of_getting_better/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-17T19:45:58.000Z | d5m4mb | 1 | 1 | ptsd | PTSD | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5m4mb/ptsd/ |
lkh7 | I am a 41 year old female. I have a husband of 15 years and 2 daughters, 19 and 12.
In the last 18 months i was caregiver to both my parents until they died. It fucked me up. I also quit my job (somehow i was a therapist on top of my game) and got into a really bad car wreck in a different country (antigua) where we were discriminated against and almost didnt make it out of the country.
Its has been 7 months since my mom died. I am getting sicker and sicker. Lost 50 lbs, terrible anxiety and PTSD. I have done 10 ketamine therapy sessions which help but whenever I go back to my house I am in an attack, when around my kids, my husband. I am not a good mom or wife.
I have a flight today to CA. I am staying for 2 weeks and then have my own apartment when i get home. Everyone is mad at me...telling me all the things I already know but I AM DYING.
What do you do when the town, the house and your family are the ones who are the trigger.
They love me...no abuse...no fighting. Im just so sick. | 2019-09-17T18:00:03.000Z | d5knnu | 0 | 4 | ptsd | Leaving my ptsd triggers (my family) | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5knnu/leaving_my_ptsd_triggers_my_family/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-17T17:59:11.000Z | d5kn5x | 4 | 5 | ptsd | Impulse control? | 0.86 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5kn5x/impulse_control/ |
lilalavender | Whenever i go out and walk past someone not even similar in appearance my mind will ask is it them and then panic will arise and even though it isn't them my brain will play tricks on me asking over and over again. I dont know what to do cause every time im in public the same problem will arise to the where it can be unbearable. Any advice would be appreciated thank you | 2019-09-17T17:34:49.000Z | d5katw | 20 | 139 | ptsd | whenever i am in a public i always think i see the person who caused the trauma but its not them | 0.99 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5katw/whenever_i_am_in_a_public_i_always_think_i_see/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-17T16:59:21.000Z | d5jtci | 0 | 4 | ptsd | Explaining emotional dysregulation | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5jtci/explaining_emotional_dysregulation/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-17T16:14:53.000Z | d5j88i | 0 | 2 | ptsd | I need help. | 0.75 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5j88i/i_need_help/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-17T15:40:49.000Z | d5irjg | 0 | 1 | ptsd | I am afraid that I'm slipping back into who I was before (trigger warning) | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5irjg/i_am_afraid_that_im_slipping_back_into_who_i_was/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-17T14:41:32.000Z | d5hy5a | 0 | 1 | ptsd | I'm horrified and I can't move. NSFW. TW: rape, abuse | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5hy5a/im_horrified_and_i_cant_move_nsfw_tw_rape_abuse/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-17T14:28:13.000Z | d5hruj | 4 | 3 | ptsd | When does EMDR start making you feel better? | 0.81 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5hruj/when_does_emdr_start_making_you_feel_better/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-17T14:18:30.000Z | d5hnbd | 0 | 3 | ptsd | [TW: Vague Description of Physical Abuse, mention of sexual abuse] flashbacks, guilt, shame | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5hnbd/tw_vague_description_of_physical_abuse_mention_of/ |
journey1992 | CBD or Marijuana for PTSD?
Hello,
I am CPTSD and really need help with regulating my emotions, sleep, eating, and staying present. What is best for PTSD in your opinion: CBD or marijuana? | 2019-09-17T12:36:31.000Z | d5gcw1 | 11 | 8 | ptsd | CBD or Marijuana for PTSD? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5gcw1/cbd_or_marijuana_for_ptsd/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-17T12:29:20.000Z | d5g9yh | 4 | 2 | ptsd | How do you overcome or ignore flashbacks?(tw: sexual assault) | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5g9yh/how_do_you_overcome_or_ignore_flashbackstw_sexual/ |
frogs-and-lilacs | Two summers ago, I (23F) narrowly avoided being kidnapped and beheaded. Another girl was kidnapped outside my apartment building in the middle of the afternoon. The killer was a friend of my co-worker, and he murdered the other girl in an incredibly depraved way. This girl was targeted at random, and I was out walking to the library at about the same time. I avoided it by pure luck. I was living alone at the time, and I slept with my knife and pepper spray for months. In fall 2017, I moved to a different country for graduate school.
The trial started this spring. I tried to avoid news from my hometown, but it didn’t completely work. I lost a bunch of weight because I couldn’t eat. It was random chance that this other girl was killed, and not me.
I graduated from my program last month, and I’m now back in my home country. I’m not sure if it’s serious enough to count as PTSD, but I find it really hard to be back. If none of this makes sense, I apologize— it’s a bit difficult to gather my thoughts. Any advice is very appreciated. | 2019-09-17T05:43:24.000Z | d5cnv0 | 5 | 57 | ptsd | Narrowly avoided becoming the victim of a disturbing crime. I’m struggling to move on. | 0.97 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5cnv0/narrowly_avoided_becoming_the_victim_of_a/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-17T05:29:14.000Z | d5cjbl | 3 | 4 | ptsd | I’m thinking of giving it a second try with my ex, but I’m scared my trauma will get in the way again.... like it did before. | 0.84 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5cjbl/im_thinking_of_giving_it_a_second_try_with_my_ex/ |
ral365 | I've been riding a huge emotional roller coaster over the past week or so. A combination of post-traumatic stress, loneliness, an unhealthy living situation, and other things left this nagging feeling of sadness inside me, like a little lump in the back of my brain. Of course, nobody LIKES to feel really sad, especially when you're already suffering from depression, so I just kept myself distracted with YT videos, music, podcasts, etc, *especially* at work (which is also where my recent trauma occurred.) It felt great knowing I was making good progress at my job, in spite of recent events. At the same time, I was getting more tired of carrying this nagging lump of sadness in my head. It was practically screaming "Hey, I'm still here! I have needs too, you know!"
Today, however, it became too much. I was fed up with dragging this pain inside for so long, and wanted to get it out of my system. It took some doing, but I convinced myself to let my emotional guard down, and broke down crying in the nearest restroom at my workplace. My boss, aware of my recent workplace trauma, let me go home early, and I talked with a counselor in the company's EAP when I got home. Now, it still hurts a little, but I feel much better knowing I've finally let myself process my sadness rather than ignoring it.
It's kind of weird, isn't it? I don't like feeling sad, but at the same time, I *wanted* to. I think I've been trying to block or ignore bad feelings for so long that part of me missed being sad about something. Sure, it hurts, but it feels cathartic to let it process through my system.
Has anyone else ever felt like that? | 2019-09-17T01:38:05.000Z | d5a4t7 | 3 | 4 | ptsd | I let myself feel sad today, and now, I'm happy about it. | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5a4t7/i_let_myself_feel_sad_today_and_now_im_happy/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-17T00:06:09.000Z | d590sl | 2 | 6 | ptsd | Maybe I have PTSD from my past toxic relationship | 0.8 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d590sl/maybe_i_have_ptsd_from_my_past_toxic_relationship/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-16T22:18:17.000Z | d57neo | 6 | 29 | ptsd | Is it possible to be traumatized by another person’s trauma? | 0.92 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d57neo/is_it_possible_to_be_traumatized_by_another/ |
indiefrecks | Hi everyone. I haven’t posted much. Or at all here. But Ive been having problems lately and could use some support. Possibly advice? Anything is helpful.
I haven’t had flashbacks in over a year since I was hospitalized. This past weekend I was at a music festival for the first time in 2 years and I was triggered so badly. Where do I even start.
To begin with, I am female. 22. Ive been sexually abused my whole life. From 6-9 years old. Then again in university (2017). In the hospital I was diagnosed with severe PTSD and Borderline personality disorder among other things but those are irrelevant atm. For coping I don’t have much. Just self harm, anything risky/impulsive like drugs and etc. Eating disorder. Anything to make me feel on edge/feel.
So back to this past weekend. I was at a music festival (EDM). I used to attend these a lot. My newish boyfriend of 2 months and I went and it was so much fun other than a few things.
- crowd
- people touching me
I used to never care about these things and love being in the crowd but lately I do care. Also these men kept grabbing my waist and belly to get by and touching my bare belly and my boyfriend didn’t notice till after. Maybe its a sexual abuse survivors thing. I don’t remember things like time or smell of the event but I remember the hands. So when a stranger has their hands on me I flip out/flipped out.
I haven’t had flashbacks in over a year. Now I’m getting them again. Im on meds. In counselling. I don’t know what to do. Please if anybody recommends anything they think that can be helpful. Right now all I have is an amethyst I’m carrying in the palm of my hand. Im trying to avoid smoking and trying to avoid taking Clonazepam. | 2019-09-16T20:43:36.000Z | d56clu | 1 | 2 | ptsd | *NSFW* TW* flashbacks*assault* | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d56clu/nsfw_tw_flashbacksassault/ |
hashememen | So, I have nightmares all the time anymore. The issue is, is that they cause one of two things. Either I can't sleep and end up sleep deprived OR my alarm can't wake me up from them so I end up missing classes. Has anyone else encountered this? Is there anyway to ensure I wake up on time? It really sucked today because I didn't get a chance to study for my exam, missed 10 points from an in class discussion and forgot to bring my lab so I have to turn it in late and lose MORE points. | 2019-09-16T19:04:09.000Z | d54wh0 | 2 | 3 | ptsd | Issues with Nightmares | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d54wh0/issues_with_nightmares/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-16T18:55:29.000Z | d54rfq | 1 | 2 | ptsd | Anyone out there also feel when they have a physical ailment, it’s like too much to handle ? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d54rfq/anyone_out_there_also_feel_when_they_have_a/ |
ella_strange | I'm exhausted, terrified, depressed, hungry, i can barely function to take care of myself and so i went literally crying and begging for help.
.... and got told i was being toxic. | 2019-09-16T18:34:52.000Z | d549b9 | 1 | 4 | ptsd | why do i even bother | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d549b9/why_do_i_even_bother/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-16T15:29:16.000Z | d528zt | 3 | 2 | ptsd | What does letting go mean? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d528zt/what_does_letting_go_mean/ |
throwaway0706199 | TW: Sexual assault
I’m kind of just yelling into the void today, but I just feel so heavy and don’t know what to do with all of that.
I look at people who are so well adjusted and healthy, the ones that do art and have friends over and cook real dinners. I’m just so upset that none of that is easy for me. I can barely manage eating a microwave meal or showering sometimes. It’s like I only have enough energy to do one thing, and once that’s done I’m done too. I see some people who go to school and work and still have the energy to go to the gym all while being happy and refreshed. I feel like I haven’t slept in 10 years even when my sleep is okay. I’m just so damn tired of all this.
I’m tired of feeling like I’m constantly at war with myself. I feel like a bad person all the time because I think “what if I’m just faking all of this to manipulate people? “ What if I made this all up?
My own body triggered a flashback the other day. I put my own hand on myself and there I was, feeling absolutely dirty and used and impure. Like he was here ruining me again.
I feel like a shell of the girl I used to be. Like there isn’t one ounce of light in me anymore. | 2019-09-16T15:18:00.000Z | d52363 | 5 | 4 | ptsd | I just need to talk. | 0.84 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d52363/i_just_need_to_talk/ |
orangeleaves_ | i look at old pictures and videos of me and it breaks my heart. I was so full of life even my eyes looked like they had sparkle in them. I was so loud and confident and wasn’t scared of anything or anyone for that matter. I walked with a purpose and a sense of happiness every single day. I loved waking up in the morning and I loved going to sleep knowing the next day I would be able to enjoy life again. I was artistic and loved photography it was my passion and pure bliss to me. I was very social and enjoyed traveling and going out. I always felt things with such deep emotion wether it was good or bad and I truly feel like that is why I used to enjoy life so much. My siblings loved being around me and I enjoyed their company just as much. Are favorite thing was to go to the beach and get pizza afterward. I would find the beauty in the tiniest things that normally people would pay attention to. I would laugh at everything especially with my friends. They were the best friends you could ever ask for and I miss them dearly. I miss always being known as the “hard working” person in my friend group. I miss sitting outside in the middle of the night on the porch with my dog feeling the breeze and having this content feeling within myself knowing that whatever happens in the future that I would get through it.
My trauma has taken that ability to feel at peace in my soul and heart.
I hope one day my siblings won’t look at me in such confusion as to why I am not the same anymore. I hope one day I will be able to finish an oil painting without dissociating for long periods of time and not being able to concentrate. I hope one day I am able to hang out with people without freaking out internally because they want to give me a hug. I hope one day I can sit on the porch again and feel that internal peace I once felt before.
time heals all. i’m hoping time can heal me | 2019-09-16T14:21:28.000Z | d51bvy | 24 | 210 | ptsd | I grieve the person i was before | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d51bvy/i_grieve_the_person_i_was_before/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-16T14:09:09.000Z | d5165u | 0 | 1 | ptsd | I grief the person I was before the trauma | 0.99 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d5165u/i_grief_the_person_i_was_before_the_trauma/ |
shatteringreality | So I have been getting this really invasive vision, usually happens when I close my eyes when trying to go to sleep. This vision involves an intensive image of a person walking from my left peripheral in front of my and a more faint person walking from my right side. This vision is extremely unsettling and is accompanied by this extremely uneasy and dreadful feeling. This has been happening for about 5 years now.
​
It has been happening more and more often and is really freaking me out, as I am scared to close my eyes when going to bed.
​
I am trying to connect the dots and I have 3 possible reasons this is happening.
1. I had a scary doctor experience removing my adenoids in Russia. This was back in like 1996 and in Russia where the doctors did traumatic shit without pain killers or anything. I recall seeing a lot of blood and being extremely scared. I would assume there were two doctors doing this operation.
2. I have PTSD from doing DMT a long time ago. I had some traumatizing experiences in the place the drug takes you.
3. I am possessed or have a hitchhiker who I potentially brought from #2.
I am really hoping that it is number one or two, as number 3 is a scary thought.
​
Please help. | 2019-09-16T11:49:48.000Z | d4zjru | 1 | 4 | ptsd | What is going on in my head? I am scared. | 0.84 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d4zjru/what_is_going_on_in_my_head_i_am_scared/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-16T11:32:50.000Z | d4zdhz | 1 | 11 | ptsd | It's 4am and I can't stop retriggering myself. | 0.92 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d4zdhz/its_4am_and_i_cant_stop_retriggering_myself/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-16T10:01:17.000Z | d4yisq | 3 | 3 | ptsd | so scared to share my trauma with my mom | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d4yisq/so_scared_to_share_my_trauma_with_my_mom/ |
[deleted] | posted here a little while ago about getting a ptsd diagnosis and since then i've had a lot happen - i got a letter through confirming that i'm on the waiting list for EMDR, i've spoken to the online chat at RAINN a few times and even told one friend what's going on, the first time i've told any friends about it in nine years. i got mad about the person who did it instead of being mad at myself for the first time ever. it's all been pretty intense but i also just want to get moving on getting better, and since the EMDR is being done on the NHS that means the waiting list is anything from 16 weeks and more.
i don't want to keep waiting. i've lost enough time already. and now i've finished school i have no projects to work on, i have no friends in the area any more, i want to be comfortable enough to start going out and looking for a job and a social life. there's a local assault survivors drop-in group tonight that i'm thinking about going to and i'm just really nervous about the idea, partly because of what it is and partly because going anywhere new makes me nervous, but i also just want to be doing *something* about this while i wait for EMDR and the buzz i got from managing to finish my masters dissertation on friday is giving me some momentum/self belief that i want to capitalize on. i dont know if i'll actually end up going today or not. or what the point of this post is. i guess i'm just very scared but also even the fact i'm thinking about doing it is a big step that i'm kind of proud of and wanted to share. | 2019-09-16T09:07:55.000Z | d4y30a | 8 | 28 | ptsd | thinking about going to a support group tonight | 0.94 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d4y30a/thinking_about_going_to_a_support_group_tonight/ |
tryingtofind-answers | This may be more of a vent. He has been sick for so long I guess I’ve lost hope on if he can be rehabilitated or not.
My brother Jason was in the army for a few years. When he came out he wasn’t right. He didn’t see combat but he had something else happen to him while he was at boot camp which messed him up psychologically.
About a year after he got honorably discharged he started getting pretty sick. I remember back then he said it was his stomach (he had issues eating food) and also his ability to think (he called it “brain fog,” he had a hard time thinking when previously he was smart as a tack).
He moved back home and my parents starting taking him to doctors. It started off small and got significantly bigger. It’s been several years now and he has seen MANY doctors. From all over the country (US). He has gotten every test you can think of, from food sensitivity tests, to GI tests, EVERYTHING.
The thing is he is insanely stubborn. He doesn’t trust doctors and won’t follow their protocol. My family and I think it is psychological. Be he REFUSES to admit it has anything to do with his brain, and instead focuses on his physical body. Although from the thousands of doctors he’s seen (and the thousands of tests he’s done) everything comes back pretty much normal.
I don’t know what to do. This has taken such an enormous toll on my family. He has threatened to harm my family (as well as himself) multiple times so most of us have cut contact (we have contacting the police, muliple VA places, everything you can think of, but they won’t/can’t do anything). He blames our family for everything. The only person he has contact with is my mom, who is degrades every chance he gets. She is the sweetest person alive and he blames her for his situation (even though she was the one who fought for him and got him out of the army since they weren’t taken care of his medical needs).
I am so heart broken. This isn’t the man I grew up with. I just want my old brother back... But he’s no where to be found.
We are all certain it’s psychological but he gets angry and violent when we mention that. Our family thinks he needs to be on medication (antidepressants at least) but he won’t take any medication his doctors prescribe.
I know this is an extreme case and I thank you greatly if you made it this far. I don’t expect anyone to figure this out overnight so I guess this is more of a vent than anything. I just don’t know what to do anymore. We all think he needs to be on medication (we think it’s PTSD from the army) but he takes the pills for one day and throws them away saying they are making him sick. I don’t know how to get through to him. | 2019-09-16T05:24:23.000Z | d4w99y | 7 | 9 | ptsd | My brother is sick and I don’t know how to get through to him | 0.86 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d4w99y/my_brother_is_sick_and_i_dont_know_how_to_get/ |
[deleted] | I have a pretty bad imposters syndrome about mostly everything in my life but I get it hard when it comes to my PTSD. I don't know if this is too personal of a question but what are your flashbacks like?
mine are triggered by the most annoying things (aren't all triggers annoying?) and they don't put me into a full memory where I feel like I'm in that moment (you know like the way media portrays it, everything fades around you and suddenly you're back in that memory). I usually get a painful stabbing memory that crosses my mind and it's hard to put back away into my trauma box. it's like a clinging image that I'm shocked came up because I forgot it happened and then I just struggle to forget it again. or I get a wash of a disgusting feeling over me (for context my PTSD is because of sexual abuse) and I feel gross to be in my own body so much so that I actually feel nauseous and sick.
what are your flashbacks like? sometimes I feel like mine aren't valid or they aren't "true" flashbacks because I've seen so many portrayals in media that it makes me feel like maybe I don't have a serious case of PTSD. do you guys ever feel this too? | 2019-09-16T05:06:34.000Z | d4w380 | 3 | 6 | ptsd | Imposter Syndrome: are my flashbacks valid? | 0.88 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d4w380/imposter_syndrome_are_my_flashbacks_valid/ |
waywardandweird | Fourteen years ago, it was my 24th birthday, and I was in my third round of treatment for a cancer the doctors said would kill me in under a year. They were just throwing what they had against the wall to see what stuck. I've beaten a recurrence since, but I have lost a lot of friends and acquaintances along the way. So many that I took myself off of social media (FB, etc.) years ago, in large part because I dreaded the daily RIP posts. Now I'm 38. I'm the age people usually are when they get that cancer at a young age and I'm 14 years in. I was getting it together and was supposed to start my last year of nursing school instead of chemo. The side effects of the treatment ruined my life and I am literally only here because it feels like after a lifetime of abuse and health issues, I've fought too damn hard to give up. I just don't know why. | 2019-09-16T04:29:51.000Z | d4vqsl | 4 | 8 | ptsd | Survivor guilt and my birthday. | 0.85 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d4vqsl/survivor_guilt_and_my_birthday/ |
Str3ssT3std | Just curious, as I was dismally depressed, suicidal, & had anxiety for about 30yrs. The depression just sort of faded away but the anxiety drove me to seek treatmemt. When I took the depression test I was on the low end of normal but recognized that I'd lived with the "no" questions before & just a few years ago I would have scored at the top end. My anxiety test was very high end, of course, which led to the CPTSD diagnosis when symptoms & history were assessed. I'm just really curious if this came up for anyone else? If so, how does this happen? | 2019-09-16T04:16:09.000Z | d4vm06 | 0 | 6 | ptsd | Anyone else have low depression but high anxiety? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d4vm06/anyone_else_have_low_depression_but_high_anxiety/ |
ral365 | I haven't been officially diagnosed with PTSD, but I have been suffering some PTS from a traumatic event that happened at work 2 months ago. Since returning to work, I can't help but remember the painful events that took place there, sometimes envisioning the events unfold in my head. I've been working on ignoring it by focusing on my work or listening to podcasts, but other times, when my brain gets bored, it clutches onto my most obsessive thoughts, e.g. the trauma.
Are "real" flashbacks something you can't control, or is there more to it than that? | 2019-09-16T02:44:30.000Z | d4unnc | 0 | 3 | ptsd | Flashbacks: Can they be controlled? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d4unnc/flashbacks_can_they_be_controlled/ |
rumpleforeskin89 | Let me first start out saying that I didn't not rape anyone or pressure anyone into anything. Here's what happened:
I'm in a relationship with my primary partner, we'll call her Ann, and we've been together for 8+ years. At the beginning of this year we opened out relationship up to be ethically non-monogamous. Things happened and we've both started dating the same woman, Rene. Ann started about 4 months before I did so they're in a pretty solid couple status. Me and Rene started about 2 months ago so we wouldn't label us as anything except that we're dating.
Ann and I are in couples therapy where our therapist put us both through EMDR therapy. This past Wednesday, Ann did her first session with it and it brought up a LOT. But what we walked away with was her feelings of being alone and feeling second best. So at my suggestion that night, we all three had a cuddle pile on the couch that lead to non sexy bed cuddles. This was the first time Rene had been asked to share our bed with us to sleep.
We all had settled down, Ann and I smoked some weed. We all watched something on hulu and then shut the light off and commenced the snuggle.
So, Rene was raped about two years ago by someone she was dating, she was also sexually assaulted a couple times that year too by some other guy. That's all I know about it, obviously, she doesn't like to talk about it.
Anyway, after some tossing and turning, we all settle down into a triple spoon with me spooning Ann who was spooning Rene. At some point, I reached over in my half sleep stated and put my hand on Rene's belly around her button, and pulled her closer to Ann, who then got pulled closer to me. It's something I know Ann loves when I do because it's like a big hug. This however was the last straw in what had been a day long trigger for her. Apparently, a text I had sent earlier to Rene was very similar to something her rapist had texted her. The temperature of our room was the same on that night, my hand, where it was, happened to feel very similar to how he grabbed her. She said she was even wearing the same shorts that night. Now, I didn't find this out until the next morning because Rene had gotten up about 10 minutes after I pulled her in, and left crying, not explaining why. Ann and I were obviously very concerned and confused.
It wasn't until the next morning when I asked Rene what was wrong, she told me that I triggered her PTSD with all the aforementioned. She asked that I don't contact her until she's had time to process this away and that she knows and I should know that I did nothing wrong.
I am an absolute wreck.
In Rene's mind, I am her rapist. We've been friends for years, lovers for a couple months, but now, I am her rapist. I don't know what to do besides give her her space. But I don't know what she's feeling or anything I'm in this limbo of waiting for her to tell me one of three things. A. We can't be together anymore. B. We can go back to being friends but never anything more. or C. Let's pick right back up.
I'm just looking for any support or a point in the right direction to where I could get that. Obviously, I'm not the victim here. She 100% is, and I want to find this guys life and ruin it personally. But I'm also reeling here emotionally and just could use anything right now.
Thank you all. | 2019-09-15T23:58:05.000Z | d4srlh | 12 | 7 | ptsd | I've (M30) triggered my partner's rape PTSD and don't know what to do. | 0.82 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d4srlh/ive_m30_triggered_my_partners_rape_ptsd_and_dont/ |
agirlhasnoname17 | I am on the following:
Clonazapam (not a suspect because I’ve been on it for years)
Viibryd
Wellbutrin
Propranolol
Lunesta
Trazadone (every other night)
Any ideas? I hate that I’m gaining without actually having any appetite whatsoever. | 2019-09-15T17:46:51.000Z | d4nsow | 5 | 3 | ptsd | Weight gain with no appetite? | 0.8 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d4nsow/weight_gain_with_no_appetite/ |
k6ts | Back in march of 2017 I was in a car accident. I was being a dumbass and ran through a red light on my way to a concert. My car was hit on the side, we spun a bit and I overcorrected, causing the car to roll into a building. I was the only physical injury -- a miracle considering the looks of the car. Still, I cant stop panicking over how my friend reacted. I was unconscious for a bit and had a pool blood around me because of my injury, but she thought I died. I remember her asking if I was okay and telling me to please wake up. She wasn't hurt at all, and I just have a nasty scar from my injuries; no one was hurt other than me. Although it was my fault, no one seemed to blame me for what happened. At first, I was fine. After a while, I slowly started wondering why I didn't die and how I should be dead. She was fine, but I keep having dreams about her dying in the crash and it being my fault. I have nightmares where I am in the car again, looking at her and begging for her to wake up. She doesn't move, they get me out of the car and I have to explain to her mom and her little sister what happened. After the crash happened, they told me the accident wasn't my fault, an obvious lie, but they told me it was okay and they didn't blame me. That just made me feel worse. It's been a year and a half now, but I still have panic attacks over it. I just don't understand why I keep having these dreams and panicking over them. I go to a therapist and try to talk about it, but it's like I can't open up about it to anyone without a feeling of guilt. I shouldn't be holding onto this after all this time, I was the only injury and I caused the crash. I don't think I really deserve to be upset over something I caused. Still, at random times I think about just the idea of me crashing and seeing her body laying there in the passenger seat, me killing her that day due to my negligence. She is fine, she drives, she is back to normal, so why am I holding on? | 2019-09-15T09:28:43.000Z | d4ibkq | 2 | 9 | ptsd | PTSD from car crash | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d4ibkq/ptsd_from_car_crash/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-15T06:53:27.000Z | d4h4ku | 6 | 16 | ptsd | DAE Find that staying up until you can't keep your eyes open anymore greatly reduces nightmares? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d4h4ku/dae_find_that_staying_up_until_you_cant_keep_your/ |
BigFprime | People here are talking about what it used to be like and how it is now but I only know this. There is no memory of before.
I suffered through some prolonged and severe trauma as a child. I got removed from my family when I was 15 and spent 13 months in a psych facility. I was released to a state group home and turned 18 there and was shoved to the curb on that birthday.
Basically the trauma now is every single person who has ever loved me or I loved heart and soul has abruptly stopped and abandoned me. Parents and two wives. The wives I don’t blame them, it must have been hard being married to an emotional shell of a person. This background is relevant to my current symptoms and questions.
Here’s what happens every single day. I have things I need to do to survive, and I can generally do them. I go to work daily and don’t get fired- I don’t do a very good job but always just enough to avoid detection. I try though but am awful. I have things I need to do after work for me, cook dinner, clean up, wash clothes, whatever. I intend to, and today will be different I swear every day, but every day is the same. I freeze and I shut down. I subconsciously let my vision go unfocused and it’s like I’m gone, I’m in a trance. I don’t feel anything, I’m a shell. I can do things that allow mind numbness such as play video games or watch short videos, usually porn, but nothing beyond that will ever get done.
I’ve been trying to find where my mind goes just before it leaves and where it is when it is gone and I finally think I know. Responsibility triggers a terror and I go through those three times in my life over and over and over again when my dearest loved one suddenly withdrew their love. My mom is blaming me for her mental unhealth and ending our relationship (at 15), my first wife is on the phone with her boyfriend and it suddenly clicks or my second wife is staying out after work every night and finally admits to random encounters every night. I’m there. It hurts so bad I have to be numb. I must be numb now, I’m not sure how I can write this.
Then my mind builds panic and anxiety. If I’m single it tells me I always will be and if I’m seeing someone, all of a sudden I’m convinced she’s cheating and will eventually betray me and I live in that terror. I turn into a detective, virtually stalking and spying and never able to relax around her again, then it ends.
The thing is, everyone I was seeing except one was sleeping around and I found out. It’s like it does protect me from that hurt again so it’s almost a reward for this thinking.
I’m at a loss, my therapist wants to talk about my mom and tell me my fears of being unloved forever or eventually cheated on again are unfounded but they are clearly founded. I don’t understand. My psychiatrist prescribes me anti anxiety medication and says see you in a month. The meds give me this mental shell effect full time, which is what I’m trying to stop doing.
Internet strangers, does anybody know what’s wrong with me? Is this PTSD? What part of that should I emphasize to my mental health professionals? I need help and I don’t know who can help me or what help I need. I’m desperate. I’m so tired of living month to month in a pig sty I can’t make myself clean for the life of me. | 2019-09-15T05:44:31.000Z | d4gknq | 10 | 4 | ptsd | Do I belong here? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d4gknq/do_i_belong_here/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-15T05:14:50.000Z | d4gbmf | 1 | 2 | ptsd | The hopelessness | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d4gbmf/the_hopelessness/ |
jukeboxjourney | I’m a musician and am alone in a hotel room after a gig. I’m freaking out because it’s not the safest hotel and at some point I had lost my key in the parking lot. I got them replaced but now am having a huge trigger response worried that someone is going to find the key and search every door to find where it works.
I have sexual traumas and this is really triggering some stuff. Hard to breathe. | 2019-09-15T04:09:30.000Z | d4fpwz | 4 | 13 | ptsd | Help: Having a panic attack | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d4fpwz/help_having_a_panic_attack/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-15T03:01:15.000Z | d4f24h | 0 | 1 | ptsd | Wondering why I still try | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d4f24h/wondering_why_i_still_try/ |
andilyne | I made a post here earlier to talk about my anniversary date and that my PTSD is getting worse the closer it gets. I’m going to my school’s counceling center which I’m looking forward to so I can manage better come my anniversary. The one thing that I’m worried about is my anxiety tics because I haven’t had them in 2 years but with my anniversary coming up, they’re coming back. I made/ am making a bunch of new friends and I have this fear that if they see me ticking, they’ll think I’m weird or they just won’t understand and distance themselves. It could just be me overthinking things but it’s a concern I have which makes things worse when added onto the anxiety of my anniversary. Do any of you feel that way/ know anything that helped if you were in the same situation? By that I mean lessen your tics or learned how to explain them properly? I’m going to talk to my counselor but idk I just want to hear from others who have PTSD. | 2019-09-15T02:57:18.000Z | d4f0po | 2 | 2 | ptsd | Reappearance of Tics-How to Explain Them to New Friends | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d4f0po/reappearance_of_ticshow_to_explain_them_to_new/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-15T01:57:31.000Z | d4eejj | 3 | 1 | ptsd | Ideas about nightmares - help ? | 1 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d4eejj/ideas_about_nightmares_help/ |
[deleted] | [deleted] | 2019-09-15T00:58:50.000Z | d4dsju | 1 | 4 | ptsd | Kids can be so naïve | 0.83 | https://www.reddit.com/r/ptsd/comments/d4dsju/kids_can_be_so_naïve/ |