jmaczan/rick-and-morty-script · Datasets at Hugging Face

text stringlengths 0 1.11k
Jerry:
Okay, Let's not rehash that fight. I sense that you're busy and will now be on my way.

Jerry:
Whoa! What is this on the floor? Some kind of literature for a really nice-looking nursing home. Hey, honey, crazy idea bad pitch let's put your dad here. Let's put your dad in a nursing home.

Beth:
Hey, Tom! We know when we're losing him. WE CAN HEAR THE BEEPS!

Rick:
There she is. All right. Come on, Morty. Let's go.

Morty:
Oh, geez, okay.

Morty:
Oh, man, Rick. What is this place?

Rick:
It's Dimension 35-C, and it's got the perfect climate conditions for a special type of tree, Morty, called a Mega Tree, and there's fruit in those trees, and there's seeds in those fruits. I'm talking about Mega Seeds. They're they're incredibly powerful, and I need them to help me with my research, Morty.

Morty:
Oh, man, Rick. I'm looking around this place, and I'm starting to work up some anxiety about this whole thing.

Rick:
All right, all right, calm down. Listen to me, Morty. I know that new situations can be intimidating. You're looking around, and it's all scary and different, but, you know, m-meeting them head on, charging right into them like a bull that's how we grow as people. I'm no stranger to scary situations. I deal with them all the time. Now, if you just stick with me, Morty, we're gonna be—

Rick:
HOLY CRAP, MORTY RUN!!!

Rick:
I never seen that thing before in my life. I don't even know what the hell it is! We got to get out of here, Morty! It's gonna kill us! We're gonna die! We're gonna die, Morty!

Rick:
Oh, Morty, take a deep breath. Breathe that breathe that fresh air in, Morty. Y-you smell that? That's the smell of adventure, Morty. That's that's the smell of-of-of-of a whole different evolutionary timeline.

Morty:
All right, Rick, look how much longer is this gonna be? Shouldn't I be back at school by now?

Rick:
Are you joking me? I mean, look at all the crazy crap surrounding us. Look at that thing right there. What the hell is that thing? You think you're gonna see that kind of thing at school? Look at it just lumbering around. It defies all logic, that thing.

Morty:
Yeah, Rick, I get it. We're surrounded by monsters. That's kind of the reason why I want to leave.

Rick:
Ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta. Morty, you see this?

Rick:
You see what we just stumbled upon, Morty? Any idea what that is down there?

Morty:
The mega trees?

Rick:
That's right, Morty the mega trees with the mega fruit on them and that's what I'm talking about, Morty. That's where my seeds are. If we would have done what you wanted, I would have never have found them, because you're so in love with school.

Morty:
All right, all right. So, what's so special about these seeds, anyways?

Rick:
You ask a lot of questions, Morty. Not very charismatic. It makes you kind of an under- underfoot figure.

Rick:
Just take these shoes, Morty. They're special grappling shoes. When you're wearing these things, these babies, you can basically just walk on any surface you want, Morty up, down, below, turn around to the left. These things really bring it all together.

Morty:
AAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!

Rick:
You have to turn them on, Morty! The shoes have to be turned on!

Beth:
I am not putting my father in a home! He just came back into my life, and you want to grab him and stuff him under a mattress like last month's Victoria's Secret?

Jerry:
I told you I was ordering you something for Valentine's Day. More importantly, your father is a horrible influence on our son.

Beth:
It's fine, Davin.

Jerry:
Since we're fighting, if you ever have an affair with that guy, I will come to the hotel room and blow my brains out all over your naked bodies.

Beth:
Look, I appreciate the stress you're under, but Morty was having trouble in school way before my dad moved in, and the only influence I can see Rick having is that, for the first time in his life, Morty has a friend.

Jerry:
Well, maybe you're right.

Beth:
Uh, yeah, maybe I am. I'm my father's daughter. I'm smart. Why do you think I'm a heart surgeon?

Jerry:
Ahem, Horse heart surgeon.

Principal Vagina:
Hello? Mrs. Smith? This is Principal Vagina, no relation. I wonder if you and Morty's father might be able to have a chat with me this afternoon?

Rick:

Jerry:

Okay, Let's not rehash that fight. I sense that you're busy and will now be on my way.

Jerry:

Whoa! What is this on the floor? Some kind of literature for a really nice-looking nursing home. Hey, honey, crazy idea bad pitch let's put your dad here. Let's put your dad in a nursing home.

Beth:

Hey, Tom! We know when we're losing him. WE CAN HEAR THE BEEPS!

Rick:

There she is. All right. Come on, Morty. Let's go.

Morty:

Oh, geez, okay.

Morty:

Oh, man, Rick. What is this place?

Rick:

It's Dimension 35-C, and it's got the perfect climate conditions for a special type of tree, Morty, called a Mega Tree, and there's fruit in those trees, and there's seeds in those fruits. I'm talking about Mega Seeds. They're they're incredibly powerful, and I need them to help me with my research, Morty.

Morty:

Oh, man, Rick. I'm looking around this place, and I'm starting to work up some anxiety about this whole thing.

Rick:

All right, all right, calm down. Listen to me, Morty. I know that new situations can be intimidating. You're looking around, and it's all scary and different, but, you know, m-meeting them head on, charging right into them like a bull that's how we grow as people. I'm no stranger to scary situations. I deal with them all the time. Now, if you just stick with me, Morty, we're gonna be—

Rick:

HOLY CRAP, MORTY RUN!!!

Rick:

I never seen that thing before in my life. I don't even know what the hell it is! We got to get out of here, Morty! It's gonna kill us! We're gonna die! We're gonna die, Morty!

Rick:

Oh, Morty, take a deep breath. Breathe that breathe that fresh air in, Morty. Y-you smell that? That's the smell of adventure, Morty. That's that's the smell of-of-of-of a whole different evolutionary timeline.

Morty:

All right, Rick, look how much longer is this gonna be? Shouldn't I be back at school by now?

Rick:

Are you joking me? I mean, look at all the crazy crap surrounding us. Look at that thing right there. What the hell is that thing? You think you're gonna see that kind of thing at school? Look at it just lumbering around. It defies all logic, that thing.

Morty:

Yeah, Rick, I get it. We're surrounded by monsters. That's kind of the reason why I want to leave.

Rick:

Ta-ta-ta-ta-ta-ta. Morty, you see this?

Rick:

You see what we just stumbled upon, Morty? Any idea what that is down there?

Morty:

The mega trees?

Rick:

That's right, Morty the mega trees with the mega fruit on them and that's what I'm talking about, Morty. That's where my seeds are. If we would have done what you wanted, I would have never have found them, because you're so in love with school.

Morty:

All right, all right. So, what's so special about these seeds, anyways?

Rick:

You ask a lot of questions, Morty. Not very charismatic. It makes you kind of an under- underfoot figure.

Rick:

Just take these shoes, Morty. They're special grappling shoes. When you're wearing these things, these babies, you can basically just walk on any surface you want, Morty up, down, below, turn around to the left. These things really bring it all together.

Morty:

AAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!

Rick:

You have to turn them on, Morty! The shoes have to be turned on!

Beth:

I am not putting my father in a home! He just came back into my life, and you want to grab him and stuff him under a mattress like last month's Victoria's Secret?

Jerry:

I told you I was ordering you something for Valentine's Day. More importantly, your father is a horrible influence on our son.

Beth:

It's fine, Davin.

Jerry:

Since we're fighting, if you ever have an affair with that guy, I will come to the hotel room and blow my brains out all over your naked bodies.

Beth:

Look, I appreciate the stress you're under, but Morty was having trouble in school way before my dad moved in, and the only influence I can see Rick having is that, for the first time in his life, Morty has a friend.

Jerry:

Well, maybe you're right.

Beth:

Uh, yeah, maybe I am. I'm my father's daughter. I'm smart. Why do you think I'm a heart surgeon?

Jerry:

Ahem, Horse heart surgeon.

Principal Vagina:

Hello? Mrs. Smith? This is Principal Vagina, no relation. I wonder if you and Morty's father might be able to have a chat with me this afternoon?

Rick: