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What changed things for you?', 'Thank you for being the only responder and sharing your story. Sorry for my delayed reply, its been hard to do anything even online. And for lack of better words, sorry you had to go through all that but at least you were lucky enough to have your attempt fail with minimum physical harm. Im thankful that happened for you, and to be honest in a Nausea way I wish this would happen to me- its Hyperactive behavior I desperately want to commit Suicide without the death part if that makes any sense. I just want to wake up or snap out of it somehow and change my reality, and make my parents understand just how desperately I need help for all these problems they refuse to take seriously back when I actually tried to reach out to them. I have so much Anger about the fact that theyre responsible for my existence, I force myself to stay alive for them, and then their response is to make doing that as difficult as possible to continue.Most of my friends (when I had them) were on the autism spectrum and I can relate to a lot of what they go through, as some of my disorders have some overlapping symptoms that get mistaken for autism often (OCD, Phobia, Social Anxiety Mental Depression disorder, sensory integration disorder). Id be happy to be your friend, but it sounds Hyperactive behavior youre in a slightly better place than me at the moment and I dont want to be a burden. You seem Hyperactive behavior a nice guy and I hope you get yourself some friends who deserve you one day.I go to therapy once a week, which helps in the sense that my therapist is the only human being I get to have real conversations with so I havent gone totally crazy. I have been on over 20 different kinds of meds over the course of a decade, which ranged from being neutral to making things much, much worse. I wish all of those resources that have been wasted on me could have gone to someone else if it would help. I got out of bed today despite really not wanting to, so I guess thats something. Part of the reason for that was because I felt obligated to write a reply. Thank you for that.

Ideation

Have you tried making things with your hands? I took up painting to get my mind off of things, getting lost in your mind can be dangerous ... So I starting making black and white painting that meant something to me. Maybe you can weld things together, just a hobby to try out. Make something and call it art ', 'Be the support he needs if you wants someone to help. Not sure if you want to keep pushing and dealing with him but if you want that pressure, keep letting him know youre there. Hangout with him, keep him busy.If hes trying to kill himself he needs to be watched. Good thing telling his sister, we want someone at home to keep him safe. ', 'Just let spill it to him.. Let him know. Youre trying to reach out to someone you do know and hes right there. Even if he is distance. If telling him will make you feel better do it. Whatever makes it easier for you to deal with.

Indicator

Well, First things first. You have us here and whilst it might not seem Hyperactive behavior much, being able to vent your feelings is a good way to start building back those bridges. Family always seems to be a difficult one, You cannot choose your family but you can choose what interactions you have with them and whether they are positive or not. The fact that you are here, you seem more than intelligent and want help shows people you want to do something about it, Anyone who would ignore you for that is not going to be the best of friends. Its about finding the niche that you enjoy. Reddit is a great place for that at least. What is it that you find yourself doing most of the time for a hobby? Computers, reading etc? Just dont give up, There is always a chance it will get better regardless of how dark it seems. ', 'Well, You know you can always come speak to us and we wont be pissed off at you for anything. Nor will you have to trust us. I have been in a similar situation to yourself, I lost my partner after being together for 6 years and even still after a year I think about them. They will always be apart of your life and its completely human to feel the loss of that attachment. As for your life, Do you have the option to go to a different school and try something completely new? I know it seems Hyperactive behavior a huge gamble and most people wouldnt understand, However a fresh start might be something that you need to get away from the routine you have now. Never give up and feel free to talk anytime. ', 'Are you in the US or from somewhere else?I know in the UK we have a lot of money advice services and if it is loan repayments then in special circumstances they can reduce the debts barely a few dollars per month. Killing yourself to get your mother out a financial hotspot is a terrible answer to it and that isnt meant to sound harsh to you because I know youre trying to do all you can for her. However, Would she want your death on her conscience all because of money?Please do post some more about the situation and I will see what advice I can offer. You did the right thing in posting here. ', 'You be in the same place but without the ability to draw on other peoples influence and experience and learn from it. Youd still be an awesome guy. When you feel better come back and offer advice to someone else. <insert Lion king, circle of life quote>If you ever need anyone to talk to. Hit me up. ', 'People have a bad habit of assuming that it is solely for attention when it happens with a partner breaking up. No one seems to remember that when we split up with someone, We are at our most emotionally vulnerable. There will always be people you can contact that will try to offer you support, I am 25 and had a 6 year relationship blow up in my face last year. I felt the same as you did now, completely lost with no one to talk to or that could even understand. You did the right thing in asking for that help. Never give up and let the doubt win. You are still young (I hate saying that knowing how much it annoyed me when people used to tell me as an 18 year old) and while it does seem Hyperactive behavior a chore to be young. Think of it as a chance to do something completely different. You have the time to enroll in a school course of your choosing. You could do anything you put your mind to. I think the key thing to remember is finding things you enjoy or that makes you happy and try to forge your path towards it. You know you can always talk to us along the way. ', 'Hello. How are you doing Shawshenk?Have things changed at all?', 'You arent alone. You know you can always come on here anytime and either myself or someone else would be here to listen and help in anyway we can. I have been in the situation myself and still currently am. Firstly, For the money problems have you spoken to any debt management companies or to your providers directly? They usually can set up minimum payment plans if you are in financial difficulty. It might not seem to work but as soon as you open up the lines of communication with them it DOES help. Secondly, If the SO is no longer living with you, could you possibly get in another lodger to help with the current bills, It could also help give you some distractions if it is a nice housemate. Just makes sure to get contracts >.>Thirdly, If you are really struggling at the moment, have you spoken to your local GP or doctor about it? They can always offer short term or long term therapy or some medication just to help you through these rough patches. You arent alone in this suffering Shawshenk. I am in a similar situation myself and the thing I have found that brings me a tiny bit of happiness is being able to give some of the advice I cant give myself to other people. You need to find something that gives you a feeling of achieving something instead of focusing on the negatives. I know you can do it. ', 'I am struggling with something very similar to yourself. I am a young person who finished school but yet cannot seem to find the motivation to actually want to do something with my life. It all seemed pointless to me despite being a generally well rounded individual, which put me further and further down the spiral. I had someone ask me a simple question and it is one that I still cant answer yet but I have a feeling once I know it, It will give me a direction to start walking in and one I feel I need to ask you. What makes you happy?

Ideation

I think there is a lot in this book that would benefit you: http://www.ryanpatrickhalligan.org/documents/Forever_Decision.pdf', 'Thank you very much for your kind words. I appreciate your concern. To address some points raised so far, I will provide a detailed description of my situation.Generally my life is fine. I have a permanent admin job with a local hospital, which I enjoy. I work 30 hours a week and, while it is less money than I would Hyperactive behavior, it is enough to live on. I currently live with my parents, but am looking for a house to share with a close friend. I graduated from university two years ago with a 1st. I have a small but very close circle of friends, a very large number of lesser friends and acquaintances whom I see often and get on well with.I simply cant bear the thought that its over forever with my ex. Ive been in love with her since I was 10 years old, and am 24 now. We went out for a year and a half. It would have been 2 years on December 5th. I have felt a very keen sense of Sad mood for as long as I can remember, far back into my early childhood. At work, at uni, with strangers, with friends, with my family, I have always felt this Sad mood. I have only not experienced it when with my ex.I have never been comfortable with myself. I feel physically strange, that the world is too small for me, in a very literal sense. Yet also, that my body itself is also too small. My ribs and back feel twisted and sore, Hyperactive behavior they are locking me inside myself. I want to rip my ribcage open down the middle and release what is inside. At the same time, I am afraid of what is inside. I feel black inside. Not hollow, but filled with some kind of black, viscous fluid. I feel Hyperactive behavior it is alive, or sentient at least...some kind of massive, rotten tumour that has a will of its own. Still, the pressure that it exerts from within is very strong, so want to open myself up to get rid of it, even though I know it would be terrible for the rest of the world.But neither do I feel Hyperactive behavior most of my body is really even part of me, and more that it is Hyperactive behavior...I guess a wire construction, with my brain forcing everything along. My body is Hyperactive behavior a cage, or a prison, and my brain is the jailer.I feel Hyperactive behavior I have squandered the opportunities I was presented with. That I have made a succession of poor decisions, and that I could have done a lot better. I have done nothing with my degree (Drama and Scriptwriting). The last thing I wrote was a 50 min radio play, I completed the first draft I guess...four months ago? A month before my ex Ventricular Dysfunction, Left me. I got some feedback from a couple of lecturers at my old uni, and a woman I work with doing a weekly Writing for Performance class for local teenagers. I havent redrafted the script, or sent it in to the BBC. I have started a few scripts since then, but either not got past the first page or even the initial planning.After uni I spent 9 months living in London (and got together with my ex while there). I spent most of it unemployed, only managing to do some temporary admin for local hospitals. My parents foot the bill, so I now owe them \xc2\xa33,000.My ex Ventricular Dysfunction, Left me during the final stages of her own degree (Fine Art, with a focus on Performance Art). As Id had to move back in my parents, we lived in different cities and only saw each other at weekends. During the last month of our relationship it was even less, as she was very busy with her course.During this period I also decided to change my name. Since a Suicide attempt in my 2nd year at uni, I have felt very guilty and stupid about trying to kill myself. I felt that changing my name would enable me to draw a line under those experiences and move on. I did this without consultation from anyone - I wanted the decision to be as unfiltered as possible, as I felt it was an entirely personal decision. My parents and ex reacted very badly to the news, they felt betrayed that I hadnt asked them about it before. Two weeks later, my ex Ventricular Dysfunction, Left me.I have therefore wasted my education, my income, and the only proper relationship I have ever had. I feel that I have let down the people I hold dear.I know that my ex will never get back with me. Neither of us is actual sure why she got together with me in the first place - I had asked her out on previous occasions and been rejected. Our relationship has been damaged too badly to ever recover. Since she Ventricular Dysfunction, Left me, I have begun drinking every day. Usually 5 units a day, which I know isnt much, but am also told that to drink every day is not healthy. I have had perhaps three or four days in the past three months when I havent had a drink.Im too Exhaustion to keep existing this way. Neither do I feel capable of getting help. I cannot talk to my friends or family about this. I cant even really talk to my ex about this. We have exchanged some texts briefly over the past few days, but I felt incapable of putting into words how I really felt.I am therefore taking steps to commit Suicide.', 'Thank you for your thoughts. I certainly do enjoy writing, or at least used to. I find it very difficult to do so anymore...I dont feel that my writing has any value, and cant realistically imagine breaking into the business.I know the sensible thing to do is to get help. I know I need to ring a hotline, or ask my GP for a referral to the shrink. My Mum is actually a psychiatric nurse, ironically. But I cant bring myself to do it. I keep wanting to answer people honestly when they say, "How are you?", but I just cant bring myself to do it. I always lie and reply, "Im fine."I have ordered the materials required for my Suicide this evening. I also have a backup supplier in case my primary source sees through my lies and refuses sale.

Behavior

Please, dont do it. Im sure that there is someone out there who can help you. You may not believe it, but Im sure many more people then you think will be upset if you were to commit suicide. Please dont.

Supportive

I fake being an innocent and shy little person, but in reality Im just cold and bitter in side, I just choose not to show it.', 'Both 16 :)', 'That sucks. At least Ill wait til Im officially alone to kill myself.', 'Whats with the downvote?', 'I would, but 1. My Anxiety Mental Depression prevents me from doing anything that isnt mandatory2. From what ive been told from a friend they make you feel really stupid Hyperactive behavior it was in front of you the entire time or something Hyperactive behavior that. ', 'You guys have truly inspired me. No therapist Ive known has given me this much help. Thank you.', 'They dont offer guitar lessons and dont have guitars. But of course they have a bunch of dumb brass and percussion instruments anyone could care less about.', 'Wow. Im in your exact same situation, same age and everything. What I do when Depressed mood is try to get away from whatever or whoever is causing it if there is a cause and just make it through the day. It may not be the best answer but that is what I do.', 'Im 16', 'Nine Inch Nails, Downward Spiral is my favorite album of all time. I also listen to some Arctic Monkeys or something more socially exceptable when Im around people so I dont look Hyperactive behavior an even bigger outcast.', 'Ive read a few things on alcoholism and the dangers of it and yes it is very scary I agree. I definitely DONT plan on abuse. ', 'Thank you, Im here all night.', 'Yes but I only see it happening to me. It is CLEARLY me who is saying the wrong thing and I hate it :(', 'They arent my friends anymore, so thats good I guess.The problem is I want to be something, I just cant find anything to be. Im not saying that I want to be the best at something, I just dont want to be boring and have a boring life.', 'Im 16. My family is fine I guess. They could care less about what I do but they treat me fair. Sleeps a nice thing for me because that means the day ends, I get to relieve the stress.', 'Im not sure if it is bad as she used to have it, but she used to be anorexic and cuts herself every now and then, but I can tell she is Depressed mood.', 'Addition: My mom loves and treats her boyfriend and his kids better than she ever did me. I doubt she even wants me anymore.', 'Nope, you can try and name some talent i have. Many people tried and failed :(

Ideation

That Anxiety Mental Depression sounds brutal. Have you gotten any professional advice, or tried things Hyperactive behavior Abnormal dreams aerobic exercise or deep breathing exercises?Maybe the degree you are studying for is not what you really want to do. Does it help others in some way? Have you done a kind deed recently? There is someone Social fear and dying alone in a nursing home or hospice near you right now, maybe you could do something for them? Or go to an animal shelter and walk one of the dogs that is locked up all day.', 'Zoloft and Lexapro and Effexor all made my Mental Depression worse, and almost killed me. I would try to ge off of them if i were you, and just be regularly Depressed mood Hyperactive behavior most people instead of actively suicidal.', 'Well maybe you should smoke some weed then. God put it on earth so people could deal with all the shit.', 'Sorry you are in a tough spot. Without getting into philosophy, here ae some practical tips:You may have to look for a job away from your family. T is scary and sucky but youll be okay.Finance and business are filled with scumbags. Since you have time, contact a nonprofit nearby and offer to volunteer one day a week. This will help you form a network, maybe meet friends, maybe even turn it into a job or gain some experience.The internet thing is hard for sure. Even though everything is digital nowadays, spend $20 or whatever and get some cards printed up with your name, email, and phone number. Play around with the design a little bit, and write something Hyperactive behavior "professional problem solver" or "apprentice jack of all trades" and give one to people. You could go to a local hardware store for example and say you are enthusiastic and looking for work, maybe you will get a job and learn about drills and meet the Dewalt rep.You could also start your own business - how about detailing peoples cars while they are in their office? If you do a good iob on some VPs mercedes maybe he will think to hire you.', 'Geez, that could be my story, except I have made it to age 36. I hang in there because every once in a while I meet a wonderful woman who makes me forget the pain, and I feel really good. I have those little whispers while she is with me that it could end at any second. And then it does, she dumps me, and there is a suicidal downward spiral. It works out to about 98% misery and 2% happiness for me and I guess that trade off keeps me going.', 'Relevant username!', 'What do you Irritable Mood by a person you shouldnt love?', 'I think it is pretty well proven that Phobia, Social media makes Mental Depression worse. Your mom is right about broadcasting Mental Depression. It is hard not to in real life, but on Phobia, Social media you could broadcast lies and pretend to be happy say stuff Hyperactive behavior "i am so happy today saw a cute kitten" or whatever.', 'Lie.', 'It is strange that you apologized for your English skills, when they are fine. I wish I could speak a second language. Thats great you have a girlfriend. I just got dumped bu a girl I was dating, and I dont even know why, I really enjoyed spending time with her and I really believed the feeling was mutual.That is good you are in therapy, i have tried it before and if I could get out of bed I would do it again.', 'I am in the same boat as you. My parents are good people and raised me well and with love, i was just born broken and defective. Once they are both gone I will off myself. ', 'Way more people are killed by dogs than rattlesnakes every year. Where do you live? Your best species for death would be a Mojave green or a timber rattler. But it will be incredibly painful and there is a good chance you will live, especially if you are bit on the hand or foot as opposed to the neck.', 'And who says the military is an easy life? Seems Hyperactive behavior the most depressing horrible job ever. I Irritable Mood just look at the statistics of how many service members commit suicide.', 'Maybe. My D levels are normal but i have lived my whole life in a pit of drakness. I take additional vitmanin D becsuse it is inexpensive and i seem to get Nausea less often when I take it. It cant Chest Pain anyways.', 'Bye Drew, sad to see you go. But we will all die, so good on you for doing it on your own terms.', 'You are way harder on yourself than she is. Maybe she is terrible at chess or is missing half an ear and thinks she is ugly, but you would still be with her.', 'How did you pull it together to get a masters degree? ', 'Another thought, if you go to your employer and say you are an alcoholic or mentally disabled I am pretty sure they cant fire you, they have to give you time for treatment. ', 'Or go for the gold, mushrooms!', 'Is your birthday coming up? You could host a nice birthday party and see everyone and then check out after that. Or if you cant wait that long, have some other party or organize a rafting trip or barbeque chili cook off or something.', 'Take a giant deep breath, as slowly as possible. Once your lungs are totally full and you can feel them stretch, hold for 10 seconds and let it burn. Breathe out, as sloooow as possible. When your lungs are Depersonalization, push out that last little bit of air and hold your lungs Depersonalization for ten seconds.Repeat three times please.', 'People break up. You are dealing with being sober. Dont apologize and for goodness sake stop with the Facebook already.', 'Do you get out in nature much, or have a chance to have a garden or hunt or fish? ', 'Does your school have mixers or reunions for alumni?You could join a Toastmasters group and improve your public speaking and maybe network.There must be some "american association of financial analysts" type professional organization with a chapter in Chicago, you could give them a ring and offer to help organize their next meeting or maybe they have a happy hour once a month.', 'I dont have any advice for you, sorry. Just wanted to say that you are a good person and there arent many people Hyperactive behavior you.', 'Your logic is good and you have a sense of humor.', 'Yeah thats a tough one. I try to help people Hyperactive behavior beggars and stuff but if I gave a dollar to every one I see i would be out of money in a very short time. And a couple weeks ago i saw an old crippled man begging. I gave him a buck, and he immediately asked me for 2 bucks and it made me feel bad. No one else nearby gave him anything. It hurts to care and try.', 'I dont believe anyone reading through SuicideWatch is completely happy. And are you 27?', 'How old are your kids? Are they into anything? More than money I think they need a father. Can you take a day and do something special with them? ', 'That sucks. Why not move to a city where you dont need a car?', 'Dude, if you dont die you should totally get yourself to the US, or australia or new zealand. You wont starve to death, and women will be iterested in you as soon as you talk to them because of your accent. A scottish lad would do great in New York City, you would have to have roomates but you are young and could start a whole new life.', 'That must be awesome to be attractive and have people asking you out, and then taking you out.', 'Maybe he realizes there is no such thing as "help". Sure the doctor/pharmaceutical complex sees him as a customer but really some people are just born to suffer.', 'It will be bad, but maybe after five days you will feel better and can kick the Drug craving for good. Generally stopping cold turkey is not advised.', 'I am way older than you and havent figured out how to enjoy much so far. I had fun once, two summers ago swimming in the ocean. It hit me, oh, this is what people Irritable Mood when they say they are having "fun" or enjoying themselves. But thanks, you are a good person and it sucks how good people suffer meanwhile scumbags have happy lives.', 'Check your life insurance policy, most have exemptions for suicide. Shitty, right? So you would have to make sure it does not look Hyperactive behavior a suicide.', 'You should form a straight edge hardcore band and beat up the audience members when they come on stage. Like a straight edge GG Allin (self harmer nutcase) crossed with Henry Rollins.', 'It is nice that you are trying, but some people are just here to suffer and die. Your friend may be one of those people where no amount of therapy or pills or ECT will ever help.My advice wpuld be to take your friend bowling or to a rope swing or some kind of physical activity, maybe a roller coaster? It may provide some minutes or moments of relief. Talking or watching tv does not do that.

Ideation

Thank you for sharing...its proved to be another rough night. Was out all day, hence the late response. I do relate to this though...especially now.', 'Feeling lost at the moment... Confused in a way... Its Hyperactive behavior I want nothing more than to have someone to laugh with.., to talk about things with....but I wish the people currently in my life would just go away. I think my head is full of too many paradoxes... Go stay.... Live die... Love hate... Sleep awake.... Its overwhelming. Like Im two people at once. I can see things rationally... Like Im so overreacting kind of way... But I also feel this overwhelming sense of just give it up already -just how many times can I say its going to get better. My heart hurts. I know Im a better catch than the way the world treats me. Im Nausea of feeling less than adequate.... Theres a lot that goes into that...but yeah.Certain things make this lonely heart break more....Hyperactive behavior feeling cold...I remember what a warm body feels Hyperactive behavior.... I miss that so much. It makes me colder and sadder just thinking about that. Sometimes Ill see a joke or a comic....or want to try a new place....or go on vacation.... Vacation is a big one... And I realize theres no one to share this with... I can go away by myself.... But Im alone. It really fucking hurts to go through the life experience and have no witnesses. ', 'Are you kidding Ive even looked at websites where you pay someone to just cuddle with you... But it feels so desperate... I guess part of the problem is the want... I want the feeling if want... Ive done so so much wanting that I just want the roles reversed for five minutes. As for depression... I was treated for it at one point because of the result of a bad car accident that gave me PTSD.... But honestly it just felt Hyperactive behavior I was on pills that took away who I was. Plus the whole car accident basically just showed me how little I mattered to anyone even though I should have died.... And thats just it.... Part of my brain feels Hyperactive behavior I should have died.... And maybe thats why my life is so crap, theres no one on earth for me because I was supposed to die and it went wrong. If the guy that hit me just went a little faster I would maybe be part of the stars or birds or trees and I wouldnt feel this awful aloneness. ', 'I think my being alive might be an error. Im living beyond the expiration date. Or sometimes I just muse that maybe the love of my life is dead and thats why I dont get to meet them yet. I do my best to put on the good show regarding feeing depressed. I try not to make it public. Or drag anyone into it. ... But honestly, its bullshit because if I was pretty someone would be there anyway. We all know this. ', 'Ended up falling a asleep...still hurts though. Ill read your poem.Yeah I get a lot of that "Im looking for" but Im right here.... I love travel, so thats a big one. Not even to anywhere far.... Plus I think part of it has to do with my Facebook feed being full of honeymoons.... Love and travel... Greeeatt.... Plus I went to school with rich kids out of my Phobia, Social class all growing up... So they are always huge lavish honeymoons from successful brilliant people who have the connections to have the job of their dreams out of college.... But not my friend enough to help me - Ive tried. But the employment situation is a whole other thing.

Ideation

You say that people may be Chest Pain for a bit but they will be on soon there life will return to normal but that isnt true. It sticks with people. They blame themselves & become tormented with the fact that you are gone. Have you talked with anyone? Possibly seen a counselor? You have this one life do your best with it. I know life is Depressed mood & some days are darker than others but theres beauty all around you. Dont give in. Fight it. Dont let Mental Depression take you away from those who love you. ', 'She would still feel guilty even with a note. I was 7 when my mom tried to commit suicide. She didnt go through with it but I still feel guilty that she even attempted it. Those who I knew that were only distant friends that killed themselves haunt me. I blame myself for not being able to have made a change in their lives.Life gets better but it will also get worse & then better again. You have to learn to roll with the thunder of tearful sorrow & bask in the sunlight of happy thoughts. Nothing is black & white. What works for some is disastrous to others. If something helped one person but doesnt work well for you does not Irritable Mood your are forever doomed. You just have to find what helps you.I avoid music, look at cute pictures on [imgur] (http://imgur.com/r/aww), watch funny videos on YouTube, put together puzzles to busy my mind, or play video games. I try to think of all of the good things that have happened in my life. It doesnt always work but I remind myself how much it would destroy others who care about me if I gave in. I am seeing a counselor & have recently been told that I may need to start taking Anxiety Mental Depression medication. Another thing that I do is write. I keep a journal, write poetry, make up songs, etc.I may not know you but I have hope for you. I want your life to be full of happiness. Dont give into the darkness. Keep fighting & live.

Indicator

Make Anxiety Mental Depression your bitch. Seriously though, is this a new thing? Like, possibly related to becoming engaged new? Because if thats the case, you need to put some serious thought into your relationship.Also, you might try talking to your profs. They are people too, and can be understanding. Maybe you can get an incomplete, with extra time to finish all your work. ', 'It will matter when youre dead. Suicide is selfish. Do you want to put your mother through even more pain?', 'Dont do it. If nothing else, post to r/loans, r/assistance, any number of subreddits dedicated to helping each other out. Stop smoking weed. Try to get any job you can - Im a cashier and I make 800 - 1200 a month. If youre not a Bronchitis, Chronic pot smoker you should be clean *hopefully* within a week or two. Did you consider getting a bike? 20 miles sounds bad, but its really not once you do it for a couple weeks. Just dont give up. If your roommate is really your best friend he would be way more pissed that youre considering Suicide than that you dont have rent money. I was suicidal for 7 years. I still have my moments, but overall Im very glad that I didnt succumb. The key is to get Anger. I was suicidal because I was convinced that no one liked me (I dont make friends easily) and I would be forever alone. I finally realized that everyone else can go to hell. I havent made anything of myself yet, but Im working on it. You can too. Get Anger at the world, Anger enough to want to prove it wrong. Youre 23. You have your whole life ahead of you. Do you really want to end it all now?', 'Is grinding of the teeth a thing with suicidal people? Ive ground my teeth down so much they need to be reconstructed. Never put the two together though.', 'I know at least one person who seems pretty consistently happy. She doesnt have much money, she has a crappy car, etc. But she is always optimistic and makes great friends, the type who go white water rafting and hiking and etc. She eats healthy, is constantly active, and doesnt really care about material possessions. I think thats one of the key problems. As long as material wealth is what makes you happy, youre always going to want more. ', 'You do not want to find a girl with mental problems. Sure, theres a chance you two could have a healthy relationship but its more likely to be a train wreck. ', 'I think that this sense of worthlessness is common among upper middle class kids, especially when we fail to live up to expectations. Probably during your moments of clarity you decide that youre going to change, youre going to go to class and stop the drugs and so on? Well you cant just change your entire life in a day. Start small. Like, do you brush your teeth every day? If you dont, do that. Just start with tiny little things and do them without fail. Once youve got that down, Attention Deficit Disorder another one. You cant acquire motivation and discipline with the snap of your fingers. If youre skipping class then no matter how much you study youll probably have problems. So just, try your best to go to class. If youre totally lost then mention it to the teacher, they are there to help you. Trust me, I know where youre at. Im in about the same place and just giving you advice that has been given to me. That feeling of being a waste of space is killer. ', 'I have to fight the urge to drive into oncoming traffic every time Im behind the wheel. Not because I want to Chest Pain someone or die, Im just.. curious? And yea, I imagine other forms of self harm, but I hate Ache and would never do it. I also dont have many friends, everyone seems to be an asshole, fake, or want to use you. I have two very close friends and a handful of other people I talk to or hangout with. I feel Anger and happiness, but not very often, and I cant express it Hyperactive behavior other people do. Like, I dont get excited. It freaks people out for some reason. And wow its weird how many other people feel exactly the same. There has got to be something wrong with society these days.. ', 'You know, if youre dead set on Suicide, then whatever. But this is a board for people who are begging for help. Probably even you. If someone really wants to go, theyre just going to do it, not post to reddit. Basically, please dont come on here and tell the people asking for help that youve decided Suicide is inevitable. Your negativity isnt helpful.', 'So you were abused or something, but youve blocked it out? Definitely sounds Hyperactive behavior cause for counseling. And if you were abused, you never really forget it. Even if you manage to suppress it, its still there. I guess something happened to me in middle school and I literally cannot remember 3 years of my life, but I still freak out if someone touches me without warning. ', 'Finals ugh. But other than that, alright.', 'Yes. And if I say anything Hyperactive behavior "hey, you guys did blah. Y u no drop me a text?" they accuse me of being insecure and needy. And so I feel worse.', 'Ive been Hyperactive behavior this for years. Im slowly working my way/being pulled out of it. I would be sure that they test for a thyroid condition, as that is a frequent cause of what youre describing. Failing that.. I dont know what to tell you. It took me many years of feeling this way, and I still battle it everyday. I finally decided that either I needed to decide to live, or just go through with killing myself. It helped that I met someone who tends to kick my ass (figuratively) if Im being negative. Find a reason to live again. Consider all the things you at one point wanted to do in your life. Then think about what it would feel Hyperactive behavior if you never got to do them. When I did this, I was stunned to realize that I would be upset. It was kind of the kickstart to caring about my future again.', 'Oh is this more signs of depression? Funny story, I went to the doctor and told her that I think I have depression. She said I didnt seem Hyperactive behavior a Depressed mood person. (I have felt this way for half my life so Ive gotten pretty good at faking happy, and I try to deal with Stress with jokes and stuff. Doesnt Irritable Mood Im not Depressed mood.) I told her I was sure. She asked how. I told her Ive been suicidal off and on for 7 years. She told me I was **making it up**. So yea, finally decided to get help, and that is what happened. Its cool though, fuck her. Im working it out on my own.Good on you for getting your life together. Ive been struggling with that Mental disorders need to please my whole life.', 'How old are you? ', 'Which ones are you taking, if you dont mind me asking? Is it just Lexapro? Im not on any, but Im trying to get an appt with a psychiatrist. I dont usually feel sad for no reason, I just have no motivation and stay in bed for hours everyday, which leads to not doing things I need to do, which leads to being sad. Also an aspiring writer, but I cant muster up the will to write. ', 'Yea, cannabis tends to amplify whatever state of mind youre in if I understand correctly. ', 'So basically, youve lost your faith in humanity? Why dont you go lurk on some of the happy boards? Like Random_Acts_Of_Pizza and co.? Cause I think youll find youre wrong. Have you ever tried to make someone elses day? Suicide is, for the most part, one of the most selfish things someone can do. Im not trying to be mean. I was suicidal for 7 years. In the end I didnt want to be that much of a dick to my family. ', 'Alright, just to put this in perspective - Im 23F, with a college degree, and I cant get a job. I lost my best/only friend and my job on the same day. And it really sucks. But I firmly believe that it is going to get better. There will be other girls, other friends. Youre twenty. You still have most of your life left. Think of all the things that you want to do, to see. Its hard to go on sometimes, I know. I go whole days where all I do is curl up in bed and sob. But **it will get better**. ', 'Well thats a huge part of your problem right there. If you have to have validation from others to be happy, youre always going to be struggling and easily Depressed mood. Have you been to r/GetMotivated?', 'Sounds Hyperactive behavior you may have atypical depression. Characterized by lack of motivation and general feelings of Lethargy rather than sadness and despair. Drugs and therapy might help. ', 'While I am of the one opinion that this is quite possibly doomed to failure, theres really no reason that it cant work. People all over the world have arranged marriages, never meet before theyre married, and end up having very happy lives together. Youve actually spoken to this guy!So, yes, be careful. But Im sure youre aware of that. And I Hyperactive behavior to believe that miracles can happen, love at first sight does exist, and that we dont always need to be mired in reality. I would also Hyperactive behavior to say that I love how cheery youre being to all the haters. Good luck!', 'Im not saying you should disregard people with mental problems. Im saying that a person who has diagnosed mental problems should not give up on normal girls and focus exclusively on girls with mental problems. Because, Hyperactive behavior it or not, one person with mental problems will already affect the relationship. Two will be even harder, not easier. ', 'You have to click on his name, and then it will say message him or something.

Behavior

It should be non-sexual, because sex and love two completely diferent things to me. I would Hyperactive behavior to embrace somebody who would spend as much time thinking about me and being loyal beside me as I do about him/her. I want to be fully accepted as a human, thats what I wish for.', 'I enjoy playing video games with my friends. But its kind of weird laughing while playing while wishing to be dead. even in these moments the core of my souls is sad. I dont believe they value our friendship as much as I do. In the near future I plan moving from this home to my own place because my family has a huge negative impact on my feelings, I am not sure if this helps enough to be fine though, bit its a first step', 'it was my mother who forced me to learn for an exam in school, at the same time I had an arguement with my best friends and we hated each other, I did not see any future for me and maybe it was more hormonic back then. after the Suicide attempt, my mother lied to the hospital that it was no Suicide attempt but an accident. so it burned in my mind a long time', 'death does not Irritable Mood resting, you will never think/feel anything again

Attempt

yeah... it helps a lot... thanks', 'where do you live? im studying in an asian medical school, though im just a beginner... if possible i can help you out by introducing you to good psychologist here.', 'if she was popular things must have the personal ones Hyperactive behavior family related problems... it may not be because of her having a bad relation with family but might be due to internal differences or some kind of fights between other family members... ', 'believe me, no one wants to die. and if she was the type of girl you explained, she was a lot tougher than most. as strong a girl as she was, she wouldve have never chosen Suicide if it were not serious. girls never let out their real feelings. specially if theyre Mental Depression related. i dont know myself but thats just how girls are. theyll smile the brightest when Depressed mood. it must have been a big deal to her that she took this step. i understand her...', 'i did...to a friend', 'ahh.. im in south asia... i dont know any good doc in North Carolina... but ill ask my teacher if they know any good psychologist there... dont worry..!!! were all with you! :)', 'i can understand your feelings very well... i have a similar past so i can understand most of feelings. Hyperactive behavior, it wouldve been better if i was not born. things wouldnt have turned out Hyperactive behavior this, at least my siblings wouldnt have suffered...etc i still do have severe Mental Depression attacks and when they do i want to Suicide and put myself out of misery... ive been trying to reject my negative thoughts...and sometimes it helps... Hyperactive behavior i developed interest in music and art, i started watching funny anime and all kinds of things... i do these whenever im free.... on the other hand i applied to get admission in a public medical school. i failed on my first try though and fell into a dark pit... but i gathered my courage n tried again and this time i got admission... i stay busy now in studying so now i only get Depressed mood when theres a fight or im alone... so try finding something that keeps you busy and it interests you.. itll help a lot...', 'umm... how should i put it... family is the major reason of my Mental Depression', 'i go to the other room and start studying... or go to bathroom until everything cools down a bit ', 'yeah... but i love my family... its all those fights and arguments... either between my elder brother and parents... and between my parents on every other thing... and im Hyperactive behavior just standing there...', 'its somewhat similar to me... but i still love my parents... well i do sometimes wish that theyd love me back but i guess its alright... i know all this makes you Exhaustion and feel hopeless.. only thinking about it is enough to break you down but you HAVE TO live for yourself... is there anything that youre interested in? ', 'i just got some hope after reading this... i dont know if i can be as brave as you are but ill try my best... thanks :)', 'ive tried my best to stay strong for too long... but i cant do it any more... every now and then im having this wish to die and end it all', 'i want to shift to my college hostel... how can i convince my parents?', 'dont think that youre alone... therere a lot of people out there for you... May you stay happy! :)', 'i tried... but i cant stay at someones place for long, can i?', 'im grateful to you for always replying... im trying my best to get myself into different things and keep myself always busy with something... ive been sketching and singing as my hobby... but the negative atmosphere and cold Irritable Mood of people... no matter how hard i try, its still the same', 'did you ask her best friend? ', 'she listened to what i said... told me that i should stay strong... itll get better

Ideation

Hey, you have a great mentality about this thing, as in you expect the worst, and you are prepared for any outcome. Although, I think that we should all be whatever we want, society doesnt really seem to think that way. Maybe in time, they will be more accepting of the LGBT community and of change. Just so you know, regardless of the outcome, you are, and you will be a human being Hyperactive behavior any other, and you shouldnt be afraid of the ignorance of others. Stay strong and live your life.', 'Who do you think sees you even though its not possible?', 'Im here also. Why do you want this to happen to you? Talk to me buddy. PM me, anything.', 'Hey. Im here as well. Please talk to us. :)', 'Hey buddy please dont kill yourself, please. Lets figure something out. Have you tried taking any job, just so you can have one, but in the meantime you search for something better?', 'Hey buddy. You can pm me anytime you feel Hyperactive behavior talking. How are you feeling now?', 'Why would someone do that? :(', 'Hey whats up?', 'Hey. I know what youre going through. Im here to talk if you want. Ill try to reply ASAP. Ow, and this really got me thinking, you should check it out: http://i.imgur.com/UhGC5.jpg ', 'I used to hate when someone told me " youll get better", " come one, its just a phase"," get over it, your a man for Christs sake". I used to get angry, deep inside because they just dont get it, they just dont realize what its all about. Im not saying that Im better now, Im trying to tackle one day at a time, trying to survive a year without ending it. But I do realize now that its okay that they dont get it. How could they? They havent seen despairs yellow eyes and lived to tell the tale. I also realized that whatever future may hold for me I will choose to experience it - whether it is bad, or it is good. I try to set myself little goals that I can enjoy, Hyperactive behavior buying a new book, or trying to learn a new song, or composing something - even if its shit. I lock myself in my room when I feel its a day, or a week, when I cant function socially - I read, I write, I play music, I watch movies, shows, whatever alleviates the Ache. I dont have an answer to your problems, and I will never have. In my opinion you are the only one that has a chance of finding a solution to your ordeal, and you are right, you probably never will have a chance of finding true happiness. But why not at least try? Through all the shit in your life, all those days without end, all those months that just get over without meaning anything. Why not just try till you eventually die? Hyperactive behavior all living things on this planet. Ive been there. Why should I even try? Why should I make myself suffer when I could end it within mere seconds? Is it worth it to live 100 years if 100 years are filled with excruciating Ache? And then comes the question, at least for me - What if I find what I was looking for in that 99th year? Dont I deserve a reward for those mindless, confusing decades? Dont I deserve at least closure?I dont have all the answers, and I will never have. I just have hope that you will live another day, and that " another day" will give you strength to tackle your problems, your worries, so that you may live to experience your original path in this life, on this pale blue dot that well call Earth.From someone that also knows how it is to become jaded when nothing works, I give you an internet hug. I hope you find your own path. ', 'Arent there student loans you can tap into? And when you get a job you pay x% of your pay per month.', 'Im sorry for that. How is your leg doing? Have you consulted a doctor or anything? Have you told your parents?', 'Well, its a great movie, and Im a big fan of Richard Ayoade, but i liked Denis Villeneuves Enemy better. They both got inspiration from Dostoevskys novel " The Double". Anyway, watch them, both if you can. After the brooding sense of Feeling despair disappeared I felt refreshed and actually got into a good mental state, reassessing my life and all. :) ', 'Im here for about 20-30 minutes, gotta go to work :\\. What do you want to talk about? :)', 'Hey buddy. How are you doing? Its been 4 days since youve posted here.', 'Thank you :).', 'Haha, yeah, Loving a Balkan Android soothes my soul; that episode was somehow good, the first of its kind. I rarely get an episode that doesnt make me wake up all sweaty.', 'Hey buddy. I care. You can talk to me anytime you want. Just PM me or reply here :).', 'Modest Mouse - Custom Concern - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rWjRaVINlJsIt gives me Chills every single time I hear it. ', 'Hey Sirpandawa, I too myself have been thinking of ending it, and Im struggling with Mental Depression, but every time I feel Hyperactive behavior there is no hope for me, no future that I can think of, i immediately re-read this http://i.imgur.com/UhGC5.jpg . Im not saying that it will have the same impact on you, but maybe it can help. Another thing that I have found to be really helpful, and it gets me to act normal again, is just pouring all my problems, all my stupid shit on a piece of paper, or on threads Hyperactive behavior /r/suicidewatch, or /r/Mental Depression. I do hope you get over this period in your life.', 'I couldnt agree more with you. The whole thing that you just need to be more confident out of the blue just doesnt work for me. Ow and Mia Wasikowska is incredibly beautiful, and has that perfect amount of weirdness that I fall for.', 'I go from wanting to kill myself to being engulfed by bliss in a matter of hours - then the cycle repeats, every single day. I tend to constantly give me unnecessary shit about how I act, how I think, what I look Hyperactive behavior. For Christmas Ill probably go out with some friends, then get home and just try to stop believing how much I failed at life, even though I just started my journey. Life in general is shit, not just because I hate mediocrity, and I truly think that I will not amass to anything in my whole life, but the fact that everyone seems so happy while I feel Hyperactive behavior drowning in my insanity, Mental Depression just destroys every little hope that I have Ventricular Dysfunction, Left from this world. But, Ill stick with having the experience of living. After two Suicide attempts I decided that if I feel Ache for 100 years, then that should be my existence. At least I fought the windmills, even though I lost.How are you stranger? How was your week, your life in general?', 'Hey buddy. Im really sorry to hear what youve been trough. I cant make things better, and trust me when I say this, if I could I would do it in a second. Im just a stranger on the internet but I know how Feeling despair feels Hyperactive behavior. I know how being truly afraid is Hyperactive behavior. But for the moment, lets figure out how can you get to school without carpooling? Is there any way for you to get a drivers license and a used car? Is there any way that you can pay someone to drive you to school? ', 'Hey, why wont you just go to that isolated Buddhist monastery thing in Asia? Is it something that youve thought about or just wrote it down as an example? Youve got nothing to lose. Try something youve never done before, something new. It helped me get pass my problems and rediscover life. I hope this helps. Im really sorry for what has happened to you, Im just a stranger on the internet, I realize that my words may not count much but give, what I just said, a try.', 'If you Hyperactive behavior it, you should do it. Get a notebook or something and draw when you are on the bus, on the toilet, sitting in bed or on the floor, stargazing whatever. Whenever you feel Hyperactive behavior to. :)', 'Never give up buddy. And trust me those who make fun of you because you are overweight are not the people you want to call them friends. Its hard loosing weight, I know because I was overweight also, but you can do it. As someone else said, you cant achieve progress over night, but with time - weeks, months - youll get there. Im free to talk whenever you Hyperactive behavior, just PM me and Ill respond ASAP!!', 'Hmmm. Half and half sounds okay. Is it acceptable to you? Can you go on more than a month and a half without going broke? If so, I think you should try this and see where it goes. BTW put some money on the side if you can for rainy days.', 'I would start with telling your psychiatrist that you arent taking your meds and telling him why havent you. Maybe you will work things out another way. The second thing is try and move on with your life. Yeah, you made some decisions and now suffer the consequences but you obviously want to do more with your life. Come clean to your parents about you leaving university and talk to them. Thats gonna be really tough but still, they are your parents who will help you get trough this. In my opinion your parents are going to be upset of you leaving uni, but the business thing? It was clearly a risk, Hyperactive behavior any other business idea. You have to take risks to succeed. Have you thought about going back to school?', 'Thank you nemo128. Sometimes I just get overwhelmed about everything.', 'The most important thing in this matter is that you feel good about yourself, whether it is you having some surplus pounds, or you having less pounds that you currently have. My view on this, and I am surely that its not a majority view ( Im no trying to be a snob here, or getting on my Drug abuse horse) is that you should feel happy the way you are. I, as an individual in this vast ocean of fish, dont get why somebody should think less of someone else based on their weight, their race, their color, their sexual preference. If you want to lose some weight, I can only say that I respect your decision. If you want to take a break, or just let it go, I can only tell you that the most important thing you need to get from this whole experience is that you managed to get to that specific point all on your own, and you deserve to be feel good about yourself for taking up the challenge. I hope that you understand that those guys, girls that you see making fun of people that are overweight are just cracking some laughs, and dont realize what it truly means to Chest Pain someone. They probably dont care, and they probably dont do this just because it means that someone else is going to suffer, they do it because their bored, and thats incredibly sad. :\\I hope you feel better about yourself, and I hope you conquer your challenge, whatever that may be. < internet Drug abuse-five from a stranger>', 'Yeah, i should start exercising and commit to it for long periods of time. Ive heard that people actually get better with the help of it. I know theres even a subreddit /r/EOD that helps you out. Im feeling a lot better today, and hopefully I dont feel Hyperactive behavior shit tonight. Anyway, thanks for answering. :)', 'Bon app\xc3\xa9tit, and thanks for taking time to listen to it. :)', 'Hey buddy. You can talk to me. Just PM me and Ill reply asap.', 'Thank you for the kind words :).', 'Hey. Im not here to solve all your problems, hell, i dont think I can solve a problem of yours, but I just wanted to tell you that you should live your life as you want to. If transitioning makes you feel better, makes you happy, you should do that. I know its hard, and you are afraid that you will lose people around you, but in the end they will need to understand who you are - a human being that deserves love and respect. Think about talking to your mother about it. Maybe she will support you.', 'First off, get rid of the alcohol and the gun. Then please talk to us. We are here, listening and Ill do everything that I can to help you.', 'I made a song about Frank Herberts Dune. I mingled with the family. It was okish.', 'Hey. Its not your fault that you are depressed, it just happens to some of us. I read somewhere that 10% of the worlds population is suffering from a form of Mental Depression - you are not alone. Im not here to say that it gets better, because it might not get better, or it might get better, I dont know what the future might bring you. What I do know is that the future will come regardless of your wishes, of your well being. When I first realized this I had a tremendous Anxiety Mental Depression attack that just made me stuck in my room for a couple of days. Am I a hopeless case? Will I just be another Suicide statistic? Or will I fight the odds? What if I lose, horribly lose against life and its problems? What then? Exactly "What then?". The thing is that I dont know, but at least Im trying, and I will try until my days on this planet will end. Will I suffer all my life? Or will I eventually find some sort of happiness? I dont know, but I really want that. I really want to find it. Ill probably never will, but at the same time, I will probably be happy, some sort of happy. Please hang in there and dont sunk into your terrifying days. I read this somewhere on reddit, and I saved it because it brings a smile to my face every once in a while. I hope it helps you too - " Your very existence on this day is contingent on decisions made by people hundreds, thousands, and even millions of years ago - dating back to the earliest humans, or even before that depending on your evolutionary views. These are very direct decisions made by your ancestors, or indirect decisions made by governments, organizations, and society in general. While you might be forgotten in a million years, artifacts of your existence will live on. Little fibers of rope, whose origins have been forgotten, yet stretch across the millenia from the past to today. And in the same way, you can create new fibers that will stretch from today into the future. Live your life, but do not forget this."', 'I dont know how things work with health care in your country but cant you just go to a doctor to check you out? Isnt that free? Isnt the treatment free?', 'Hey buddy. How are you doing? :)', 'Thank you. Really needed this. ', 'You should try african dream pop. I find it facinating: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C0xhL4Vzpgo&feature=youtu.be', 'Good for you mate :D.', 'Thanks :).', 'And its also that feeling of guilt, of shame that kicks you down. I prefer to lock myself in my room until my episode of sadness, for a lack of a better term, ends. Its incredibly frustrating more so when you ask yourself - Have I ever been happy? Or have I lived my life in a total state of Confusion until I realized how Depressed mood I feel? I hope it will get better, Im trying to get pass all these never ending days, but it feels so hard to do so. Im Exhaustion of seeking happiness. :\\', ' Sorry but I cant stay anymore, I got a final tomorrow and gotta catch up on reading. Ill reply asap tomorrow. You can PM me anytime you want. Hang in there buddy, I hope everything will work out for you. Take care. Cya.', 'Hey. What happened? :(', 'Thanks for the kind words. I was in a...really dark place last night.', 'You dont need to impress anyone, just be yourself. I made this mistake too long, trying to impress people, and i realized that its just a waste of time. Im sorry that you are cutting yourself, may I ask how this all started? And what do the voices tell you? Hope you reply to me.', 'Wow, thats a great tune.', 'French? That sounds awesome. I studied french for about 8 years and Im a complete fucktard. I cant even speak or write properly, I can understand little bits. xDHave you tried looking for a college with french classes? Is it something that you would be interested in? If not, what would you Hyperactive behavior to do if you consider looking for a college to go to?', 'Heres the link if you have time to listen https://soundcloud.com/tiqueu/kwisatz-haderach

Ideation

Our situation sounds very similar, you are right we have to keep hope, its just difficult when it seems so small. I try my best to be his friend and be the person that is good for him, I cant do much now. His happiness brings me happiness. So I dont mind doing things for him even though I probably shouldnt be. All I can do is offer my friendship and hope that one day things can change. That love Hyperactive behavior you said might bring us together again someday. Anything is possible. ', 'Our situation sounds very similar, you are right we have to keep hope, its just difficult when it seems so small. I try my best to be his friend and be the person that is good for him, I cant do much now. His happiness brings me happiness. So I dont mind doing things for him even though I probably shouldnt be. All I can do is offer my friendship and hope that one day things can change. That love Hyperactive behavior you said might bring us together again someday. Anything is possible. Ill try to keep my head up even though its difficult. I hope your love comes back to you or your find happiness in another. Thank you for your words, they made it a little bit easier. ', 'Yes, that sounds similar, Im glad you understand. Ive had a life long obsession with Japan. Its always interested me even when I was really young, I have a dream that one day I could live there. Ive noticed that it is one thing people related that I actually get any type of happiness from. I use to look up vlogs on youtube, planned on learning the language, Spent hours reading about it, and watching videos. (sounds really stupid now that I think of it) All of it made me excited, and kept my dream alive but it was also the dream of someone I cared about, so Now all of that brings me sadness. I hate how I cant love the things I use to because of them. I dont really know what I want. I Irritable Mood I know what it is but its not really something I should rely on because it could very easily be taken from me. Other people tell me to be a 20 year old, party, have short term relationships, talk to people, etc, take huge risks. I Hyperactive behavior those things and i will do them but its just not me. I can deal with being a 20+ year old, parting all that junk but in the end there is only a few things that I want and I dont really know how to change.', 'Im sorry its been tough, you can always pm me if you need to talk. :)', 'Sorry If its a bit confusing, Im a writer at heart so when I get upset, I tend to go overboard. The Anger would be my depression/anxiety/self-doubts, all around bad stuff etc. Giving into it refers to suicide. I talk to my best friend and others but I dont go into detail with them. As for professional help Im looking into it but its a waiting game since I cant just hop on it do to not having insurance :/.', 'Things were getting a lot better for about a month or so after posting. They were amazing actually. Everything crashed again in the past two weeks so I kind of took a leap in the wrong direction and am going down hill again. The depression, anxiousness and suicidal thoughts are back full force and its overwhelming. Going from such a good place for a month and going back to this misery is horrible. Im hopeless again and its sucks. I want things to change, I really do but Im at a loss. "Im getting closer to giving into my Anger" I should put it.', 'Good things where just happening and I was finally happier then I had been in a very long time. It felt nice, I felt Hyperactive behavior I could do anything and then it just crumbled and bad things started happening again. So I gave up on the things I was working towards( Hyperactive behavior going to the gym, talking to people, just creating better habbits ect.) I still made progress but I lost a bunch too. I try to get into things but then they remind of people I care about that I lost and I get upset. I try to make myself busy but its hard to do things when all you want is to stay in bed and cry. All the hope/happiness that I gained is gone now so Its hard to just keep going. I feel selfish for what I am feeling so thank you for the last paragraph.

Ideation

What if you dont die? It will just make it worse. Im not here to tell you to look at rainbows or go travel, but I want you to think about afterwards... Ive put a gun in my mouth and squeezed the trigger (safety ended up being on). It Social fear the shit outta me. I cant tell you it gets better, but it does get easier. The human race is a strange kind, the inner strength we have is amazing... you just have to find it.

Behavior

I just hope I dont wake up, I dont think I could kill myself but not existing sound good.

Ideation

Just wait a second, tell me whats going on. Have you identified whats making you feel this way? ', 'I love you too! :) And yeah, there are definitely still Depressed mood parts of life, but thats to be expected. I think once you find something or someone that youre really into, you might realize that the good can be worth the bad. :) Thanks for posting here.', 'Once you get to the other end, youll realize how worth it is. I know its hard to picture right now, but thats the Mental Depression making you feel that way. ', 'Hey there. I just want to remind you that this does not have to be the end of your story. Things seem Depressed mood right now, for sure, but its important that you dont give up right now. You can relaunch your life as many times as you want- move away, get a new job, etc. But you can only end it once.I think you should talk to your SO about what youve been feeling lately. If she is a huge reason for whats Ventricular Dysfunction, Left of your happiness, its your responsibility to let her be involved with your thoughts and feelings.This isnt the end, buddy, its just another beginning. ', 'All I have to say is this: Taking your life will be the last decision you ever make. Its not a good one. Ive dealt with Mental Depression and suicidal thoughts for several years now, and Ive also dealt with a close friend committing Suicide. I believe that this has given me a unique perspective on the subject, so let me say this: The euphoria youre feeling is not the "good" kind of happiness. Instead of accepting that this is the end of your story, why dont you change it? Im not going to tell you to find a hobby or to reach out to friends, because obviously youre beyond that mentally right now, but the only advice I can give you is this: Find whatever thing it is that makes you happy (not death), and explore it. Learn absolutely everything there is to know about it. Become an expert on that one thing. Is it a person that youre interested in? Become an expert on their life- get close to them, become friends with them, take your relationship with them further, etc. If its an activity, why not make yourself the best you possibly can be at that activity?I see youre experiencing sporadic and temporary happiness- What if I told you that you can feel that way one hundred percent of the time? There are so many methods out there for people Hyperactive behavior us, theyre simply waiting for you to find them.If youre really, really serious about this, then please, do me one favor and just call this number: 1-800-784-2433 Its the Suicide hotline. If you get to that point, then dialing that number is the first step on the road to having real happiness again.', 'Nah man, its no problem haha. You should definitely follow that thread of the person from your group therapy!!! They sound Hyperactive behavior theyd be a great person for you to relate to, and who knows, maybe theyre looking for the same thing. And yes, youre right, its probably a good idea to hold off on dating until youre sure youre ready. Of course, it can be a fun thing to follow and think about in times of sadness, though.', 'Hey man, I dont know if this helps at all, but I think you should try to focus on what makes you happy and put your efforts toward that. What do you Hyperactive behavior to do? Ive been through Mental Depression myself and what worked for me was to completely relaunch myself with different friends, ones Im happy with. Whatever it is thats bothering you- You just need to focus on it and make it better. If you cant do it alone, thats totally normal, and thats why this subreddit is here. Keep up posted! ', 'Being agender does not Irritable Mood that you are a failure. Since you are assumingly in Drug abuse school, it will be very very hard for people to accept you for what you are. I was in your position once, unable to motivate myself to do anything. There is help out there for you, though! Have you spoken to a counselor or a doctor about how youve been feeling?', 'Man, youve just got to realize that its worth it, especially since its such a short period of time between happiness and sadness. ', 'Losing someone in your life is hard, whether its to death or due to other circumstances, but maybe you could try to reach out to others in your life? Im sorry Im not being much help (downvoted to 0 right now) but if theres anything I can do to help please tell me.', 'Some Ache is worth living through, friend. As someone whos been in your situation, I know this. ', 'Im not much of an expert (first time posting here), but Id say that you should identify the things that make you the happiest and focus on those for awhile- Maybe focus on your daughter? Also have you considered talking to a professional about your problems with large groups?Like I said, Im no professional, but I used to have the same sort of problem with large amounts of people. What worked for me was to try and focus on learning more about the specific people youre with. Theres bound to be someone youre interested in in any group of people.Also, you should talk to your girlfriend about this, too. It may feel shameful for you to discuss your concerns and problems with her, but this should not be the case. I really hope this helps at least a little, and if you ever want someone to vent to, the rest of the subreddit and I are here.As someone who has experienced a close Suicide, all I ask is that you consider the effect your death will have on others. What will happen to your daughter? Your struggle doesnt have to be invisible anymore.

Ideation

No prob...So if you dont mind me asking, whats got you so down?', 'Sorry about your dog :( cant imagine how tough that would be. *hugs*', 'What does 4/14/14 Irritable Mood to you? Why that day? Also, Im here if you want to talk.', 'Despite the horrible circumstances its nice to know Im not alone. Im sorry about the breakup. ', 'This, exactly. Its almost scary how accurately youve described my life. Even the dropping out of school part. Lifes a bitch', 'Me neither, friend', 'Youre on the phone? Are you okay?', 'Well since youre voluntarily committing yourself...First youll have to go to the ER and tell them that you think youre a danger to yourself. Once you do that, they give you a bed in the ER and they watch you (youre legally in their custody now). Once you do this theres no going back, you cant leave. A few people come in to talk to you and evaluate your mental health, and once they decide what kind of treatment you need (they will 99% admit you to a mental health facility because you admitted that you are a threat to yourself). Theres usually a lot of waiting while they try to find you a bed in a nearby psych hospital. Once youre admitted to a place youre transported by ambulance to the facility, and you have to stay there a mandatory 72 hours until you can sign yourself out. Usually you get there and you wait until youre able to talk to a psychiatrist so that youre treatment can begin. Youre put on medication and you talk to a therapist. Depending on your threat level (do you want to Chest Pain others?) youre put in group activities and counseling. You talk to your therapist about a plan and depending on your progress they will tell you how long they recommend you stay (you can, again, leave after 72 hours but if you want the help you should take their recommendation.) Basically while youre there (usually about a week, maybe more depending on how youre feeling) you come up with a plan for what is going to happen once youre back into the real world. You set a variety of goals on how you and the counselors there think you can improve your situation and work toward them until the therapist thinks youre mentally stable enough to leave and continue out-patient therapyedit: youll need to figure out how much these places cost and how much your insurance (if you have any) will cover. oh, some places are better than others--there was one hospital that I went to that was Hyperactive behavior a prison, and another that was more helpful. all of these places are very strict--many rules to follow (for obvious reasons--there are many different patients with a variety of needs, there needs to be order. so be prepared for that.) P.S., Im in the Northeast as wellI really hope you get the help that you need.', 'I feel the same. I dropped out of school and ended up taking classes online. My life is meaningless and Depersonalization and void and Im at the point where I dont even want to make anything from it anymore. I just want to die. Guess I just wanted to tell you that youre not alone. ', 'Im lonely, too. Lets be lonely together. PM me. ', 'I just wanna say Im so sorry about your boyfriend and I cant imagine what thats Hyperactive behavior for you. As for your family and friends, you may think that theyre lost to you but most likely theyre Confusion and dont know how to go about being around a Depressed mood person. I know that sounds bad, but generally most people arent well equipped to deal with grief. They may THINK you want time alone to deal with your grief, but thats really the opposite of what you need. Also you shouldnt be alone in that house with all of your memories of him. I think he would want you to move on with your life. Have you tried reaching out to your family? Even friends? All it takes is a phone call. I think you should let your family know how much youre hurting. You cant get through this alone. Its okay to reach out. Im here for you. Hugs.', 'I know its hard but you cant give up. Not finishing school was the biggest mistake I made. It just isolated me even more from the world and even though I hated it at least it gave me a purpose. Ive just gotten more Depressed mood since dropping out. Take it from me. You can finish, you can do it. Just take it one day at a time. ', 'Listen....Im not saying I can fully understand what youre going through, and if your mind is made up theres nothing I can say. But please, dont go through with this. Im here, Im here, Im here. Im here, and Im asking you not to do it. You are valuable. Your life is valuable. You are worth living. You can always change your life for the better, and you deserve happiness. Dont let anyone, including yourself tell you otherwise.', 'They probably have college kids blowing off appointments all the time and thats why theyre so strict about it. I wouldnt take it personally. Do you think you can make it until the 24th? How are you doing?', 'So far shes pretty good. It takes me a hella long time to open up and shes trying her best I think. We get along well. Its only been a couple of months. ', 'I know how that is. My dad cheated on my mom when I was 13 and then they separated. The thing is, what I failed to grasp for the longest time is that their problems are *their* problems. They may be having a very difficult time right now, but youre not involved and its not your fault. Things will look up eventually, for them and for you, I promise. They may not be together but sometimes breakups are for the best. All three of you can still be happy.Also, have you considered counseling? If you dont want to tell your parents that you want to talk to a therapist you can always go to your guidance counselor (assuming youre in public school). It really helps to have someone to talk to.', 'The idea of a lifetime scares me. I feel Hyperactive behavior Ive lost myself (or never found myself in the first place) and I dont know where I would even begin. I would even go as far to say that I avoid working towards a better self. A large part of me thinks I deserve to be Depressed mood and die this way too. Im bitter, I shut myself in my room all day to avoid anything that might make me happy. Im self destructive and I cant seem to find the drive to be any other way. ', 'Im on new medication and have been seeing a new therapist these past couple months, so theres that. Thanks for your kind words. ', 'Hey, didnt see that you answered. Tough day huh? Want to talk about it?', 'Your friends may not have the capacity yet to understand what youre going through. Also if you told them casually they may have passed it off as a Crying Reflex, Abnormal for attention or as a joke. I remember kids saying stuff Hyperactive behavior this all the time in middle school -"if we get a shit load of homework again to night from Mrs.___ Im gonna kill myself." As for your doctor, a doc cant turn you away Hyperactive behavior that if youre suicidal. Its crucial that you tell him everything and make yourself clear when you tell him what youre feeling. I know its hard, at first, to open up but thats what hes there for. Hes a professional and is only there to help you. (Also, was a parent/guardian in the room at the time? If so, you could try asking them to step out of the room for a moment while you speak to the doctor privately if you feel uncomfortable with them around. Thats totally okay too.)', 'Please dont post your contact info.', 'Hey Jack, truly sorry to see what youre going through. Depression is one helluva disease and often times people dont understand the seriousness of it. Who have you tried telling? Do you have anyone you can go to talk to that would take you seriously?', 'Thats great that you went for help, thats the first step and one of the hardest things to do. I cant believe they turned you away. Maybe try calling them and setting up another appointment? Anyway, in the meantime Im here if you want to blow of some steam. Though you may feel Hyperactive behavior it youre not alone. Im here.', 'Do you honestly, really give a shit that they think youre annoying? You shouldnt. It shouldnt matter what they think.... As long as youre happy, having fun, fuck the people that talk shit about you. We all have our insecurities, and Im guessing that what they said hit a nerve--badly--because youre posting here in r/suicidewatch. But please, dont let a few college twats get the best of you. The only opinions you should take into account are those of the people that really love and care about you. The ones that look out for you. And if you feel youre lacking those, Im here to listen. ', 'I too take things and give nothing in return... Except I dont have a privileged life to fall back on. I live with my mom and we have no money. She keeps pushing me to get a job but its hard for me to get off the games and get out of bed. I feel so bad for how much I hold everyone back in my life. You pretty much described it perfectly. But.... I guess what I do is I try to take it one day at a time. One step at a time. Focus on the little accomplishments/failures of my day and see how I can improve on the next. It doesnt always work--more often than not its hard to keep positive. But I guess I feel Hyperactive behavior I keep living just one more hour, one more day, one more month, year, because who knows when this might all turn around (or maybe it wont, but the point is to stick around to find out.) I dunno. I can just picture myself in a better place a few years from now looking back on this Depressed mood self and being really glad I didnt end up killing myself. Just take it one day at a time, one thing at a time. Do it with me. You can message me, share how youre doing and Ill be sure to listen.', 'I think what youre trying to do is glorify your death. Thats ohhh so wrong. Do you think that a few dignified words will make it okay in the end? Make you remembered? Do you think those words will be spoken at your funeral as your loved ones sit, heartbroken but pacified by your last words? That maybe theyll say-- "oh, what a tragedy, but we understand because of these last words he/she Ventricular Dysfunction, Left us"? That is not how it works. That will not make everything okay. It will not make you remembered. You say youre not creative. You wanna leave a sentence behind. How about you find a different way to be remembered.... Like, by staying alive and writing a book instead? If youre putting so much thought into your words you have to have some creativity in you. Maybe thats your calling. You just dont know. You should stick around to find out. ', 'I have been looking for a job. But the thought of leaving bed and being out in the world daunts me, so I havent been trying very hard. I know youre right, though. I cant continue existing this way. ', 'I know exactly how you feel. Ive been in the same deep rut for the past couple years. But really the best advice Ive gotten (and the only advice that really works) is to suck it up and just do it. Fake it till you make it, eh? I know its not that easy. What are you feeling you have to force? Do you have anyone you can talk to about how youre feeling, maybe a therapist?', 'I do, very much so. Shes the only reason Ive made it this far. However its unfair for her to constantly live with her condition as well as Anxiety for me, whereas if I were gone at least she would have something to mourn, and then eventually accept. Im a living corpse and I hate that she has to see me this way.

Ideation

You have to call 911 right now.Youre going to die otherwise. Dont give up on life brother/sister. Call them. Please. Dont give up.', 'You have to find it in somewhere that you never been before. Deep inside your mind. Deep inside your motivation to stay with your child and your wife. You can do it.', 'Suicide isnt a freedom, brother. Its a curse.Life is hard right now for you, but you can free yourself - and not by Suicide. Its a rocky road to freedom, but you need to pursue. You need to step from that ledge. For your best friend, for your family, for anyone that has ever cared about you! You can see the beauty in the world, just give life one more chance. Let your friend be your rock and your guide through these hard times.I really hope you dont go through with this. You have so much more to live for.', 'You dont have to be ashamed of being unhappy, my friend. I get sad all the time too! I feel bad about myself, but something you have to realise is that comparison is the killer of happiness. Every time you compare something to yourself, you will feel sad. You have to acknowledge it to feel in control of it!Youre not a waste of time! Youre more than that. Youre the best waste of time ive had all week! Infact, youre not even a waste of time. Youre a brilliant use of time! And I dont even regret it. Not one bit. Because knowing that I could help you feel better is worth 1000x my sleep. Youre worth way more to me than that.People do get Depressed mood, they get unhappy, they get upset. They just dont show it. No one does! Youre not alone in this world. I promise.No, you dont need to be sorry for being unhappy. Ever.', 'Then you must move and begin your journey again. You know that you can do this, you just need to get to the first step to move. You just have to start. You can do it.', 'Dont mention it, anything to help another unique, wonderful person. (that made me feel fuzzy and good inside) Yes, while the medication will lose your ability to hear your voices, you will hear something entirely different - purely your own thoughts. That itself will be a welcoming thought when you realise that you are completely in control of what is inside your head. And no, you wont be ordinary. Youll be extraordinary. Youll be unique. Different. Special. You will have beaten the voices, even if you didnt want to. You will have not only saved your life, but many others in the process of the people around you who care for you.You dont have to be a martyr for your voices. They can be martyrs for themselves when they go away. Hurting yourself wont help you, it will not make you feel okay.I want you to do something: hug yourself. A nice, warm hug. It feels good, doesnt it? To feel Hyperactive behavior you dont have something in your head telling you to move your arms higher. That is what it will be Hyperactive behavior. Be strong, because in the next few days, you will be okay. I promise.', 'You can do it buddy. Youre still a priority. Just believe in yourself. Go to rehab, eat Five Guys (FIVE GUYS IS AMAZING), drink pepsi (or soda as you mericans call it) and live life. Its great that writing made you feel better. Good luck on your journey homie', 'If you want to enroll in some courses, and youre so unhappy... Maybe those courses were not for you, brother. You need to change your life.Tomorrow, I want you to try something. You dont have to do it, but I know that its helped me before.When you get up and talk to yourself in bed, I want you to tell yourself that Ankh0r, the kinda weird dude who is autistic, lost his dad at 7 years of age and still is here making the most out of life thinks youre a pretty dope guy. I want you to tell yourself, that all these people here are your friends who want to help you. Were your new friends, your new guide in life. Youre not an Irritable Mood brother, youre unhappy. There is no shame in being unhappy. Likewise, there is no shame on telling yourself that you should kill yourself.Its not a shame you tell yourself that you should end your life, its a tragedy. You want to take away what has brought you into this world without even tasting the good side of life first.If I can believe in you and ive only just met you, then you can believe in yourself. You just have to believe that youre a brilliant man.', 'You need help. 1-800-273-8255Look at it this way: if youve hit rock bottom, it can only get better from here. If you quit now, then youll never be able to feel the sense of achievement when you see your parents grin and hug you as you pass your degree in college, youll never see the child that you can have, and youll never see the woman that makes you feel Hyperactive behavior the man you are.You just cant end it now, because its a permanent end to the temporary problem. You can do it, you just have to believe in yourself no matter what.', 'SLEEP IS FOR THE WEAK! Hahaha :) Im just more than happy to help someone out. Im super weird, so im always up for talking. Thats brilliant to hear, just remember that there are people that care about you. Thats a long way, but just imagine it as if they were 100 miles away - youll see him again soon. :)', 'Hey! My names Caleb, im 17. Just thought id let you get to know me first before I start talking!You seem really, really Social fear... of a lot, actually. Im super, super sorry to hear about your dad. Mine didnt exactly go the same way as yours did (mine died from cancer when I was young) but I know the Ache youre going through with that. I want you to understand that while you right now wish to die, you have so much ahead of you. You have your entire life to travel the world, eat the weirdest but coolest exotic foods! You just need to believe in yourself.I know it sounds Abnormal behavior, but you need to tell your boyfriend what youve been thinking in person. He will care. Suicide is a terrifying prospect for everyone and I promise to god that the people you tell will do absolutely anything to keep you with us. You need to be honest with him. Your mother also should be told, hopefully if she is still with you or in contact with you. Ive got a TED talk I found today - it tells the story from a model about how self conscious she is. What it taught me was that beauty isnt just about looking good. Beauty is what is in your heart. It is your personality that defines you. You miss your dad more than anything, and im sure he misses you too. You have your whole life ahead of you though, and Hyperactive behavior I live with my fathers blood in my veins, you live with your fathers blood through his veins. He will live through you Hyperactive behavior my father lived through me.Everything can be sorted out, including your breasts. It will take some time, but it can be sorted. I promise.Take care, sister. Im not sure how long I can stay up for without passing up from lack of sleep, but ill try to stay on as long as possible.-A/C', 'You can do this. Youre young and you have a lot of life ahead of you. Even if the road is rocky now, you can do this and get through it.Youre making this harder on yourself. Youre convincing yourself that that is what the rest of your life is going to become. And youre right: it is, but only if you dont do something positive about it. Please dont try to kid yourself that your Suicide would be positive either, because your life is not only unique, but it is also unique to many other people. Your friends will never find another *you*. What you have to do is re-establish contact with your friends. Youve become clouded and lost sight of what your life should Irritable Mood - relationships and friendships. Thats all life is, really. Its just all relationships with other people. My words alone cannot make you change your life, that is up for you to do yourself. We can support you here, but you have to be willing to do things that otherwise you wouldnt see a point to. You have to try even when you feel you dont have hope.Good luck brother.', 'I can tell you why I think the living state is better than just being atoms in a universe.There is no manipulation in evolution - evolution is just a lottery number in which a species in born into. We were created with the ability to talk and the ability to become the masters of Earth as to say! So in a way, we got a pretty lucky straw. Imagine if Gorillas ruled the planet... ape shit everywhere!!What you have done is hardened yourself to life itself. In a way to protect yourself from the realisation that at the end of the day, we are truly just molecules and atoms and all that scientific stuff that I never paid attention to in school (because im a bad, bad boy. Teehee.)You may not be Depressed mood, but the difference is, is this moral state that you have been drawn into isnt healthy. Its made you think that your life truly is insignificant, which is a lie in itself. You Irritable Mood something to at least one person out there, no matter how little. You have made those 1.8billion atoms of however many there is in a person all fuzzy and cozy and feel good inside. You have given that person happiness, which as you said... makes you want to keep living. Now, let me ask you something - What do you think the point in life is to other people, Hyperactive behavior your parents? Your friends? The truth is, the point in life isnt in survival traits, but in emotional conflicts that we encounter and relationships we build. Those are what define us, not what evolution puts us in. Thats a primal instinct and the society we have been brought to live in is not primal anymore.So, let me ask you another question - what would you parents say? How heart-broken would they become? How Depressed mood would your friends be, when their friend person2567 (which is an atrocious username considering youre an unique and special person in your own right) gave up his own life because he didnt believe that killing himself was that bad?What would your death serve? Would it fulfil something in your mind? Well, the truth is... it wouldnt. It wouldnt serve as anything. You wouldnt feel anything, and that feeling is more terrifying than being dull to morals.So thats my answer - the living state is better because it allows you to experience the feeling of beauty in life. Going out with friends on holiday, seeing the world, mountain climbing... the world is yours to climb, friend. You need to see that yourself and you need to wake up from this trance.', 'Yo, Cambridge has one. ITS AMAZING.It makes Maccy Ds look terrible. It even makes Tea & Scones looks bad. ;)Np homie, here most times (when im awake) <3', 'Dont give up homie. Its as simple as that. You may be getting lubed up by life now, but you have a future. Even if it looks rocky for now!You need your wife to give you as much support as she can. Depression is no easy thing (I can say that most of us here have encountered it in one way or another) and I can understand how you can feel alone. For a long time, I felt alone too. Like an outcast. Like I didnt feel Hyperactive behavior I could be at home, and the only way to feel at home was to go into my virtual reality world and pretend that life didnt matter outside of it.Brother, you may be lost, but this is the start of finding your way. Get help. Call 1-800-522-9054 and tell them about your problems. My words cant make you stay, but I can influence you to start again. Imagine in a few years when you get to see your daughter running around by the beach with your wife, or whoever youre going to be with (hopefully it all works out between you two). To be honest, from what im seeing, youre a big family man. To me, that would be when I know ive made it - I see a mini me running around, making sandcastles and trying to eat sand.Dont give up. You can do this-A/C', 'With whatever money you put into drugs, dont buy them. Even if you cant afford to travel now, put them away somewhere save, and build it up until you can go. You have your whole life ahead of you brother. I trust that you can be a hero in your eyes. You can do it, you just need to believe in yourself.', 'Hey,sorry about the late reply. hoping youre still here haha.Half dead from last night, but I found the TED talk for you! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KM4Xe6Dlp0Y', 'You have another year, brother. You have many years. You have tens of years infact! We all fuck up sometimes. All of us! You can do it again. Explore the world. Live life to the full.', 'Ahoy mhearty! *cough*Yes, I can be a pirate. Its pretty fun at times. My names Caleb, im not really worried about saying my name on reddit. Either way, theres probably Hyperactive behavior 5 billion Calebs out there anyway, so ka-pice. (or however you spell it) Im 17, and im a bit Hyperactive behavior you in the sense that I struggle with Phobia, Social Anxiety Mental Depression. Who feels Anxiety of what people think of them, who feels Social fear that they will make a fool of themselves and everyone will judge them?*raises hand* (were gonna pretend you raised your hand too, this is a two-person thing yano!)You definitely took a step in the right direction by telling your mom. (or mum, thats how we spell it in England!) However, her telling you that its just a phase... maybe she didnt quite understand the severity of how you are feeling. It may just be a phase Hyperactive behavior she stated, but this doesnt derive from the fact that youre still feeling Hyperactive behavior this. Look at it this way - youre doing a major, which obviously is a pretty Abnormal behavior big thing (I Irritable Mood, the title itself is big! *major*) which devotes a lot of your time towards it. Which kinda sucks (hell, I have Autism and im truly wondering how people can manage to revise! I have to physically force myself to do it with lots of alcohol!)That itself, is an achievement that youve earned. The willing to give up so much time to achieve something so awesome. However, thats besides the point. Youre unwell and your boyfriend does seem to ring true that you may very well be Depressed mood. I had a friend who was Depressed mood, and Im actually quite surprised hes still alive. Hes been through quite a bit mentally and there was a few times that I thought he would be dead. That Social fear the living shit out of me, because he was a close friend and I cared Hyperactive behavior shit about him. Let me tell you, being Autistic with Aspergers, life is Phobia, Social Anxiety Mental Depression hell for me too! *Drug abuse five* Being Anxiety to do so many things does take a toll on your self esteem! I Irritable Mood, there was this one time in school where I had just moved, and walking to school I got dog shit on my shoes. It stank the entire classroom out and ever since, ive checked my shoes daily for a good 5-6 years in case of embarrassment!But I promise you something now: Giving up isnt an option, while quitting college no matter what your mother says is. If it gets to this point where youre contemplating actually killing yourself on a daily basis, then you shouldnt carry on with your degree. You should go to the Maldives and get Drug abuse, or do something completely spontaneous and relaxing and fun and awesome!(I got Drug abuse once. My friends hogged the spliff, one of them threw up everywhere and I didnt touch it again. Teehee.)Also; your boyfriend. If you ended your life now, what would happen to him? My dad died to cancer when I was 7, and a huge void was Ventricular Dysfunction, Left in my heart. He would be Ventricular Dysfunction, Left with regret if you died that he didnt do more to help you, your mother would be absolutely devastated that she signed her daughters death note with her signature and would probably not be able to cope with life. Your father? You havent mentioned him, but it would break him if he was a good man. It would break him until he was a million pieces. You seriously need help. You need a professional no matter the costs if this has been going on for 2 years.And most of all, you need your boyfriend. And a bit of happiness! (Which is why im half dead at 2:30am and typing to make you realise life can be a happy place)Its super late here, and I have college tomorrow. Ill keep checking in on you, and a bunch of other people - no loving, good person deserves to commit Suicide.Im here for you.-C', 'You must not die. You were put on this world for a purpose, and killing yourself will not solve that. You are worth more than a death in a newspaper. You can break your chains. You are great. Youre amazing! Youre fan-fucking-dabi-dozie, no matter what you think! You just dont know you are right now, but you really are! So, step off of that ledge. Be the person youve wanted to always be.', 'Homie, you can talk to me. Its 3am here, and im Excitability up with adrenaline. Im going to pay for it in the morning, but its worth it to talk to people who need someone to talk to. Its worth every single fucking second.Take the medication sister. Its there to help you, and to make you feel better. Sure, it might not make you feel great at times. You might even look at yourself in the mirror and feel Hyperactive behavior: "I hate how I look." But let me tell you something, even if you dont believe it. Looks, while people judge first impressions on them, dont portray you as a person. Shallow people that you quite frankly dont want to hang around with use first impressions to guide them through life. People who are rational, and friendly and want to get to know you, for who you are dont.This is a TED talk I watched earlier. It helped me realise that even though I look Hyperactive behavior a pepperoni pizza (although not as tasty) that everyone is self conscious to a degree. Even supermodels. *Especially* supermodels.The voices matter to you, yes? But theyre not you. Theyre controlling you. You have to believe in yourself, not in what these voices are telling you. Hey, want to know a secret about me? Im probably the biggest Phobia, Social outcast youll ever meet. Im really shy when I meet new people. There, we both have a fault. That is what these voices are, theyre faults. Theyre problems. Theyre your self-conscious trying to get into your mind and Chest Pain you, and tell you to Chest Pain yourself. You are worth more than these voices. You are the master of these voices. Youre the dominatrix, the mistress, the one who is pretty fucking awesome. Remember that.', 'Right now youre holding a rope in your hands that could either kill you or save you. You feel Hyperactive behavior that there is a void that cannot be filled now that your girlfriend is gone. Let me tell you a quick story before you decide to either take my advice or not.Ive had a strange life. I was born into a pretty lovely family, with caring parents. I cant complain about that at all. I had everything. However, I was diagnosed with severe autism when I was 2 and pretty much no one thought I would be how I am today. It was pretty much game over for me before life had even started. It didnt help either that just Hyperactive behavior you, a huge void was Ventricular Dysfunction, Left in my heart when my father passed to cancer when I was 7. Throat cancer, specifically. I honestly have no idea how my mum coped, but she did. She was strong. She was my rock and still is my rock. When shes there, im still okay. But that void was there for a very long time, and I never really felt Hyperactive behavior I would have a father figure again and that Depressed mood me massively. I needed someone who I could play football and do manly things with and all of that. I craved it. And then one day, my mum met up with an old friend. Theyre now together and he might as well be my dad because hes filled a void that even I thought wasnt possible to fill. I still have lots of Phobia, Social Anxiety Mental Depression, but my way of handling Autism is much, much better than it was. I can do things. I can talk to people. There isnt much of a void anymore.So, let me give you this; is your life really, really, REALLY worth ending for this? Should I have just ended my life when my dad passed away or even a few years later when I felt I had nothing?I didnt, and life is much better. Its your choice to make because youre the one with the rope and the window right now. You have the power to save or end your life. But please, there is hope for you. You just need to be your own rock. You need your friends. You need to give life another chance because otherwise youll never find the beauty in life.No, dont do it. Live your life.Edit: It was a long post, I hope to god you see this before you do it. Please reply ASAP. its 2am here but ill stay up a bit to make sure youre okay. Ill be your friend.', 'Thats the spirit! You can function without them, its just withdrawal. Youve grown so used to not having the peace that these voices have made you forget who you are! A wonderful, intelligent, sweet woman who has a problem that she is going to fix. These voices may scream, but your will screams louder. Youre you. Youre in control and I will put anything on the line that you can conquer this. Thats brilliant and im so glad I could help. Im always here if you need to talk again, because I know how much of a Disturbance in mood life can be at times. :)', 'Where abouts do you want to go? You should try backpacking. Ive heard that its an experience! Bro, if your parents are judgemental, then show them that your life is none of their business if theyre going to just give you crap for not finding the right woman. Listen, abusing drugs wont help you. It wont make you feel better. Put that money into travelling. That should be your goal. If you can see the world, then your world will open. You wont be living in a box anymore!You must not give up. You were brought here for a reason, and that reason isnt to give up. Its to live life, have a family, have loved ones, have all these things in life that are so special and can fill you with joy.Anyway, heres a funny montage from Kevin Hart. Hes fucking hilarious. It makes me feel better, so hopefully itll make you feel better too!https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vr_9TDzxK-s', 'https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ii6L_Aux9RUWatch this. From what I see, you seem to feel Hyperactive behavior no one will talk to you. But thats where youre wrong - youre trippin, homie. Youve got us! The voices are telling you to do bad things to yourself, but let me ask you something - surely these voices are your demons? These parts of you that WANT to make you feel bad. They want to cause you Ache. You have to be strong against these voices, because you have a meaning and a reason to live. You want to be a god? You gotta live for another day, son. You gotta be ready to say to your voices, "FUCK YOU! DICKWEED!" You gotta live, for another day. Day after day after day. You have to move. You have to keep living every single day. You have to take these voices and the burdens they bring along with them, and tell them that they cant be with you anymore. Youre going to become a new you, and you need to believe that. No one else can tell you, but you, yourself can change. I am here to tell you that your life means something. I dont even know you, but I know your life means something to someone on this planet. Whether it be that pretty girl that you saw during class or work that you want to smile back at you, approach her. If it is your roommates, tell them everything. You can do it. Believe in yourself.-A/C', 'Remember to do it safely! Im so glad you got the shot. Remember this feeling. Its what is going to guide you through the rest of your life - remember that you feel great after the voices go away!Its super important that you start eating healthy, and with a decent amount of food. Im kind of a hypocrite because im a sucker for junk food, but im not trying to lose weight ;). Seriously though, good luck. Im so glad that youve made it past those voices and theyre more quiet. Thats a big achievement by itself!', 'Youre right - there is no easy way out of it. But you can do it. Youre not believing in yourself when the truth is, you can achieve so much. Youve got time. Even if life doesnt look good now, just remember that youll feel fucking awesome when you get past this all.', 'Talk to me. What happened? Ill be the thing you need.Step away from that ledge. You have a live to life, you have beauty to see in the world. You have places to explore. You have the power to make your life beautiful.

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Nothing. Unhappy is *normal*. Or perhaps more accurately, happy is the exception - happiness only happens periodically. Its what makes the rest of the mediocre and unhappy times worthwhile. This is fundamental to the human condition. This is not as hopeless as it sounds - people are perfectly capable of being contented with mediocre, and essentially just being chill with the idea of the happy times being something to look forward to, and the rest being basically pointless. We evolved that way - mostly work (hunting, gathering) with the good times in the evening around the fire. It is when we start to believe that happy is normal, that everyone else is happy and theres something wrong with us if were not perpetually cheerful, that we get wound-up and Stress with the mediocre times, and *everything* then becomes an effortful struggle to get to that mythical place where everyone is happy.Theres nothing wrong with you. Perhaps more significantly, theres nothing *different* about you either. The vast majority of people are at about the same place as you are. You can learn to live well with it, and to enjoy and look forward to the evenings around the fire.', 'I just read the thread from yesterday, as well as this one. Youve heard this from your friends, but it sounds Hyperactive behavior they didnt communicate it to you very well. You are looking for something outside of yourself to fix the misery that youre feeling - friends, relationship, whatever. The fix has to be out there if you can just find it. Its not. Not for you, and not for anyone. Bear with me before getting Anger or hopeless, just a couple more minutes, k?You said in the thread yesterday that you are self-centered, and in your note today that you are selfish. Im going to have to disagree with you on that one too. The problem, bizarrely, is that you are not selfish or self-centered *enough*. Let me explain.Correct me if Im wrong - I easily could be - but you feel as though if you could just be nice enough, humble enough, self-effacing enough, gentle enough that people would Hyperactive behavior you, care about you, even love you. And youve tried it, but it hasnt worked, so you tried harder, and it still didnt work, so youre just not good enough at it, and youre fundamentally and irreversibly too selfish and theres nothing you can ever do. Thats how you feel, but its not working.You need to take back all that effort. All the energy that youve spent trying to be what other people will Hyperactive behavior, all the time youve put into earning their affection. Take it back, and use it for yourself. Be Anger. Rage at the walls. Rage at the universe. Rage at that fucked-up society that preaches humility and self-sacrifice while punishing those who are humble and self-sacrificing. You dont need to be Anger at your friends and family - theyre no more to blame than you are. But its time to take care of yourself. Do stuff for you, not other people. Others will Hyperactive behavior you because they choose to, not because you earn it. In fact, the less you try to earn it, and be what you think others want, the more they Hyperactive behavior you. Sounds backwards, but thats actually what happens - one of those fucked-up human paradoxes.So what do you actually *do*. First, think of some activity you can do that is just for you - just because you decided. If theres something you Hyperactive behavior, you can do that, but I know when youre Depressed mood you sometimes cant even think of something you enjoy. So do something just because you can. Buy some balloons and blow them up in a parking lot - then pop them all. Drive to some godforsaken hick town in the middle of nowhere and buy a Dr Pepper at the Flatulence station. Go for a swim. Doesnt matter. The point is that you do it for you.Thats just the start, but thats the pattern you need to follow. And its going to feel wrong, because it doesnt make sense in the if-you-want-something-you-have-to-work-for-it way that weve been taught. But people dont work that way - thats for luxury cars. And as your friends see you starting to take care of yourself, theyll quickly see that *youre not asking them to do it all any more*, at which point they will be there for you more, because it will be easier for them to be there for you. I know you said that youd go to hell and back for your friends, and I believe you. They may very well be willing to do that too, but that doesnt Irritable Mood that theyre strong enough to do so. Caring enough about someone to help them and being *able* to help them dont always come hand in hand. Its not because they dont care about you, its simply because they cant - dont know how, or just arent strong enough.I dont know if this has helped at all, or how far it might take you if it has. Please let me know if you need to know anything else.', 'Telling her that it would Chest Pain you to see her go, can backfire. Theres a risk of adding Stress and Guilt to all the other painful feelings. For some people it can be what they need to keep them from the edge - for others it can push them over it. You need to know the person well before even having an idea of which one it would be.', 'Are you willing to wait until spring? Can you imagine the peace of your final sunset, looking out across blossoms and warm winds? Im assuming youre not in the southern hemisphere, of course. Beautiful sights, the sounds of life returning to the world, and the smells of spring. Those would be good sensations to take with you.The answer to your question is not just about height, its about what you land on, and which bit of you lands first. Land on stone or concrete, and land with your head. (Please dont yell at me for answering the question rather than saying "dont do it" - better that he tries and succeeds, in this case, than tries and maims himself). Every yard taller the building is, is about 1mph faster, until you reach terminal velocity at about 100 yards, or about 35 storeys.The problem is that the surer you try to be, the higher you have to jump from, and so the longer you have to change your mind on the way down. Thats not a hypothetical scenario either - people do occasionally survive jumping, and that mid-point regret is not uncommon.Mid-winter is in 4 weeks, literally the darkest point of the year, in every sense. Would you be willing to set a Hypothermia, natural date for the end? Something magical, a date to rejoin the person youre missing? Spring solstice, or the appearance of the first blossoms on the trees?', 'Id second this. Try another shrink - psychiatrist (drug-prescriber) or psychologist (talk-therapy). There are good ones, and there are bad ones. And there are lousy ones, and awful ones, and ones who quite frankly ought to be taken out back and shot. Shop around, if you can, until you find someone who makes you feel better. If they dont, then theyre not the right shrink for you - no shrink can help all patients, and no patient can be helped by all shrinks. Nature of the beast :)', 'With regard to number 2 - think about how bad your injuries would have to be to make you feel as bad physically as you actually do emotionally. Is it a bruise? A few scratches? A small fracture? A broken limb? Severed limbs, gushing blood, and exposed internal organs that would make Eli Roth vomit? If youre seriously considering ending it, and people could see physically what youre going through mentally, there would be tears, there would be fainting, and there would be surgeons working round the clock. The Ache is real - dont tell yourself you need to suck it up just because other people cant see it.', 'First off: get the gun. Get the fucking gun before you do anything else. If youre afraid that shell be Anger, get the ammo instead. Dont let her have the means to take her own life that easily. If someone really, truly wants to die, then they will - but a gun means that they only have to really want it for about 10 seconds, and its done. Very little time to have doubts.Second: its difficult to know what to advise in terms of longer-term help without having some idea of her symptoms and history. If her mood is all over the place - up and down randomly, plunging into Feeling despair without warning - then there may be a relatively simple pharmacological solution. If her problem is recurring memories or feelings from whats happened in her past, you may be looking at PTSD, which needs an entirely different approach. And thats just two of the possibilities.Third: there is no known effective way of preventing Suicide long-term. The only thing that actually works is having someone there with her, and it only really works as long as that person is there. And unless youre planning to put her in the secure wing of a mental hospital, thats not a long-term prevention. The following is an *idea*, not a suggestion, just something for you to Attention Deficit Disorder to your collection of ideas before deciding what to do. I dont know enough about her to be able to say whether it would be a good or bad idea. That will have to be your call: Tell her that taking her own life is her choice to make - she has that right, and you wont prevent her. She has the right to make the Ache stop, if thats what she has to do. Often just knowing that one is *allowed* to make the Ache stop makes it easier to deal with it while it continues. Then ask her if she would be willing to put the gun into a locked case (it may already have one) which can be padlocked, and then give *you* the key. If she makes the decision to take her life, tell her she can get the key from you just by asking for it. If she thinks youll try to stop her, point out that the case can be opened quite easily with a crowbar. This will Attention Deficit Disorder a delay to any decision to take her life - either the time to get the key from you (and if she asks, then you do indeed give it to her) or the time to force the box open. The additional factor of forcing her to see, or at the very least think about, you may give her doubts.Lastly: Im going to guess from the way that you write that youre in your early 20s. Please correct me if Im wrong. The intensity of the feelings that you have for her are going to get in the way of you being able to help her. Sorry, but they will. No matter what you do or how much you care, you are *always* going to have somewhere in your mind the fear of losing her, and therefore a desire to avoid your *own* Ache. No matter how selfless you are, you have, as it were, a dog in this fight - you already said that youre afraid to go to her family in case you lose her. You may be able to help her through this on your own, but it is going to damage you really, really badly. Get someone independent and objective on your side. If you cant get her to see a professional, then go and see one yourself. A psychologist should be willing to help, even knowing that youre not the one whos actually in danger.Postscript: if you end up determining that she does need - and benefit from - medication, you can get most psychoactives cheaply from pharmacists in India. Thats where most countries that have universal healthcare get them from anyway.', 'Its hard to do this over the internet, rather than in person, but Im going to try anyway.Theres nothing that anyone could write in less than really-large-book form that would get you from where you are to where you want to be. Thats the joy of the human mind - its big, incredibly complex, contains trillions of interconnecting ideas, and therefore there is no quick way to change it. The place where you are now - and tell me if Im talking crap - is one where you are trying to filter through and understand all that information, and all of the feelings youve had for years, and then predict not only whats going to happen if you choose any one of a number of options, but also whether the possible conclusion to the attempted clairvoyance will then be what makes you happy.Or to put it another way, youre trying to understand your entire brain, every thought, experience, and emotion, AND predict multiple futures, AND THEN predict your entire brain IN those multiple futures. Its very ambitious, and most people would never think that big, but might I suggest something a little less taxing, to begin with at least? :)I want you to make a list of things that you enjoy. Not things that you should enjoy, or things that sound good, or things that were cool back when you were 9 and you think you should try taking up again. Things that actually give you pleasure, even the smallest amount, right now. As long as theres one item on the list, then thats fine. Doesnt have to be anything significant. At one point in my life the list consisted of:a) I Hyperactive behavior the first drag of a cigarette.b) I Hyperactive behavior to drink cold water.This is the starting point for figuring out what makes you happy now, and so therefore what you might be able to go and do that would make you feel happier right now. From here, you can move on to other ideas that might make you happy now, but youre not sure (possibly because theyre a bit scary too, Hyperactive behavior going to a bar and chatting someone up), and then perhaps things that you know will make you happy, but in a couple of days (ordering a couple of REALLY nice cigars online might be my example).Like I said, this is a long process. If you Hyperactive behavior, you can write back here, or privately, you can perhaps find someone (professional, or at least with some training) to help you along with this process, or you can simply take it from here yourself - entirely your call.Good luck.

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Ive been exactly where you are before. In fact...>where I was thinking of where I could kill myself so that my roommate wouldnt have to find me dead.and>The only thing that holds me back from doing this is that I know it would completely ruin my mom, brother and sister.I have had those exact same thoughts and feelings. Thankfully, I havent in about a year, but for me those thoughts generally creep in and out. For me it was actually a little comforting. When I knew that I didnt want to deal with what I had going, at least I still knew that there were people around me that still depended on me. (Thats the best way I could word it) It me helped marginally, but it didnt really make me feel any better. I still felt entirely alone and very anxious.>Honestly, I dont fear death at all.This is something that I can also empathize with. Not in that bad ass action hero kind of way, but more in the way that contemplating my own death causes no appropriate feelings of discomfort.One thing I have found that helps me, and Im posting it in hopes that it might help you too, is taking things slowly. Taking things in stride. I just live one day at a time and stop worrying about what will happen tomorrow. My situation is a bit different than yours, but this method might help you out a bit too. You said that you are getting really Nausea and Exhaustion of fighting your mental illness. It might help if you just slow down your thinking. I imagine (and hopefully Im not wrong) that you have your good days and your bad days. Make the most out of your good days. Dont Anxiety about what kind of day tomorrow will be, deal with that day when it comes. On your bad days, just do what you have to do to deal with that day and remember the good days.Despite having had thoughts similar to yours, Ive never gone to seek any counseling. For me this has been okay, but I wouldnt recommend this for everyone. My point is this, I have never gone to any professional counseling because Im Anxiety of being labeled with a disease. I know that if I am, then it will forever change how I view myself. Id start to feel as if I were broken. Im going to guess by that fact that you said that you have Bipolar Disorder II and not just Bipolar Disorder that you have been diagnosed by a psychologist or psychiatrist. (Halfway into this thought and I just realized that it is really not going the direction I intended, but please read on) Its really important to not label yourself as broken or diseased. My original point, despite the fact that it really came out the wrong way at first, is that this is definitely easier to say than it is to do. Since this is the first thing you talked about, it appears that this might be what you let define you. I hope Im wrong, but it seems that you feel Hyperactive behavior you are these diseases. You are not these diseases. The diseases are words that doctors must use so that insurance companies will cover your medication. That is all. You are simply a 20 year old female college student that is coping with some traumatic life events in the best way you know how. Dont devalue yourself by limiting your personal image of yourself to what the DSM says. You appear to be a person of value to your family and friends, and Im sure they would be happy to reiterate that fact.This may have been completely off base, and it was definitely very long. Hopefully something in here will catch and help though.Have a merry Christmas. Or, if you dont celebrate, have a merry December 25th.

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One part of your reply really got to me. The reason I think I came to my senses the last time was because of one person. It wasnt my dad, or brother, or sister. It was my mom. I know that if I suddenly died, it would hit her the hardest. Even if she was the one that paid the least attention to my sister when she told everyone, I know my death would hit her the hardest. Shes put everything on me, all her chips are on me, Im her last card in the deck. My sisters more or less a failure, one of my brothers is a failure and a douche bag, my other brother is just generally the biggest prick I know, I think I may be then last hope she has to have a successful child, one that might be decently successful but is also nice. Well, at least I bring more to the table than my other siblings, morally wise. I really dont think my siblings or dad would care if I was dead, but theyd sure as hell care about my mom. I dont Irritable Mood this in a "Im gonna kill my mom" kinda way, but Im 80% sure that my mom would either kill herself or go completely Mental disorders if I killed myself. I think that might cause a domino effect, because I think if my mom killed herself my dad would follow. Jesus, I just read what I wrote and it sounds pretty fucking conceded to me. I dont think Hyperactive behavior this usually, Ive just been thinking about my death and what would happen, and this is what I THINK might happen. This is one of my Mental Depression spurts, Im usually happier than this, its just something bad happened (my sister kind of betraying me), and I go into Mental Depression mode. This is also the first time my family basically turned their back on me when I needed them most. God this is long, if you do reply to this, I might not reply back instantly, Ive gotta finish this Diary of Anne Frank book. Also, thanks for the kind words, I really appreciate it :)

Ideation

Wonderful :) Didnt work for me. But that further supports the hypothesis that it works and is totally normal.', 'Yeah, a lot of us have found over the years that the doctors dont always work to our best interest. It sucks. We have to research ourselves to find whats best and its hard when you know you arent in the best frame of mind. Glad you are here. Ive gotten a lot of good support and suggestions from BPR. Is there anything in particular you would Hyperactive behavior your doctor to recommend for your Mental Depression and Anxiety Mental Depression other than upping your Seroquel? I had to always plan what I wanted from my Depressed mood doctor ahead of time since they always skipped over what I thought was important.', 'Did they have any recommendations for what to expect? Everyone reacts differently.', 'Your serotonin receptors are used to being modulated artificially. They werent being regulated for four days and werent keeping up with the amount of serotonin trying to bind with the receptors in your brain. Itll take a while to re-acclimate and if you taper down, youre still going to experience some Withdrawal Symptoms effects.Sorry, medical advice is not allowed here, so I always preface with talk to your doctor. Im just going off of my own experiences. Ive been on numerous SSRIs and other meds. Its no fun. When I taper, I cut the pills in half and take half, then either every other day or one fourth a day. The Withdrawal Symptoms symptoms can still last for months, but hopefully youll have an easier time with it being at only 20mg.', 'Im an atheist as well, so I understand the feeling of nothing. I would focus on one thing at a time and try not to overwhelm yourself which is really easy to do. You have your list here, so thats a good start. Im reclusive, so I dont have friends either. The internet is my friend. I went for about a year with no job and I would suggest ignoring the loans and debts. Throw the bills away for now and label the collector phone numbers and make their ringtones silent, etc. Being overweight is very rough, its uncomfortable physically and mentally, but that also is something that can be dealt with at a later time when you feel stronger and more in control. Therapists play stupid mind games that dont work on me either. Im not stupid. When you say "Im hoping an angel can show up and lead me to the places I used to dream" are you saying you are looking for some guidance? What are these things you used to dream when you were a child?[EDIT] and I dont get offended, so if Im not helping, please tell me.', 'Do you have any type of philosophy? Like do you believe in determinism or free will? When I find patterns in nature and math, it makes me feel Hyperactive behavior all of life is a miracle. I dont normally call it a miracle, I call it a coincidence. But I still find it positive in some way. Im not religious, but I feel Hyperactive behavior everything happens for a reason so I am a determinist. Please tell me if you disagree with any of this. The real world is Depressed mood and I agree its very hard to find good in all of the shit, but I get excited when I find something I see as positive because it is so hard to come by.', 'Its very frustrating and a vicious circle that can make you feel worse. How long have you been together if you dont mind me asking?', 'Same. I take Klonapin. Some people take propranolol for Anxiety Mental Depression though. I switch back and forth depending on my blood pressure and how many doses of my benzo I have taken/have Ventricular Dysfunction, Left. Might ask your doctor about beta blockers if they wont prescribe benzodiazepines.', 'You got fired? Is there a loophole for wrongful termination that you can get unemployment?', 'I went to a psychiatrist in Bedford off of 121 and 183 that took insurance when I lived in Texas. It worked out for a few years. Only caveat was that I only saw the actual doctor once and was pawned off to his MHMP that could write scripts. She started me on about 4 or 5 different meds at once in the beginning. I eventually figured out on my own what worked best for me and basically asked if I could have those and she gave me what I asked for. Ill find the doctors info if you want?', 'Ive developed this recently as well. Mostly when Im trying to go to Hypersomnia. Even with the drowsey side effects of different mood stabilizers, I still have Initial Middle Sleeplessness. Ive read this could also be a side effect of Initial Middle Sleeplessness, not necessarily the meds. (I usually take Geodon)', 'We all deal with Stress in different ways and we get body modifications for different reasons. I dont personally have facial tattoos, but Ive had my forehead pierced and I still have my septum and other large tattoos. My first tattoo was a swastika on my Ache wrists that I occasionally catch flack for, but most people dont know that a swastika can Irritable Mood peace, so I plan on expanding it when I get the money. You sound Hyperactive behavior you thought you put on a facade and that the damaged lone wolf is not who you are. It very well might have been who you *were*, and now youre heading into a new phase of life where you have a different perspective. Regret is normal and it sucks. You did say you would Hyperactive behavior advice. My advice, learn from your experiences and keep being the good person that you are. If you eventually want your tattoos gone, save up money to have them lasered. Its expensive and painful, but it would be another path in life you can choose if you want. If you have other concerns and dont mind chatting, feel free to reply or message me.', 'I feel you. Its a vicious cycle. I have trouble meditating and focusing when Im stressed, so I usually watch one of my favorite movies to distract my mind if the anti-Anxiety Mental Depression meds arent helping. Lately Ive also been listening to music and surfing Pinterest for motivational quotes. You cant always prevent a cycle, just have to try and breath through it until its over. Only 3 weeks, youre in the home stretch. You can make.', 'I agree, just call your doctor and explain that youll be without meds for fours days and ask if theres anything you need to do.', 'Yep, this could easily happen to me. Thank you for posting.', 'Those are pretty standard for mood disorders. First line treatments...if those dont work, usually a benzodiazepine (Xanax, Ativan, Klonapin...) benzos are more "addictive" and doctors hate prescribing them. Lexapro worked very well for me for a long time. I take risperidone when my mood is too manic, insomnia, wound up.', 'Have you signed up to get unemployment benefits from the government?', 'Have you asked your therapist to recommend a new prescribing doctor?', 'Guess Ill be the iOS person. I havent found a really great app that works the way I would Hyperactive behavior, so I use two. I mainly use my iPeriod app because it monitors a lot of the same things (plus you can Attention Deficit Disorder your own symptoms), but when I need to keep track of my Manic episodes (multiples in one day), I use Moody Me. Mood, emotions, symptoms, treatment, and triggers are all separate categories you can track.', 'Geography and computer science honestly sounds really fun. What about geography dont you Hyperactive behavior?', 'Im very picky about who I hang out with. Ive been unemployed and stuck at home on the computer as well. I saw someone suggest in another sub to look for an exercise buddy on Craigslist. I may have just been lucky, but found another local Redditor looking for the same. We talked through Facebook while I investigated everything on it, on her Reddit account, etc. She passed my background check. We ended up with a lot in common and have been meeting to exercise everyday this week. Meeting people online, getting to know them while researching on all Phobia, Social media sites has been working for me. I also networked on Facebook when I moved out of state. If you have a Facebook with acquaintances that are far away, ask them if they know anyone you could "friend" that live close by and get to know.', 'Thanks, youre right, that was in the wiki. I will do that.', 'Thanks, Im listening to Sinatra and Billie Holiday, going to avoid my Pandora rock station for a while. Watch more Comedy Central and less Dateline lol. Good tip.', 'Ah, thats good. Hope you have a good holiday weekend.', 'Honestly Im jealous. Geodon worked so well for me, but then I moved and lost insurance. (Geodon was $500 a bottle without insurance last time I checked) My doctor put me on Risperdal in November and I only take it when Im moody on my period with food cravings to start. Both made me equally as sleepy, but I acclimated to the Geodon much better. I tried to stretch out what I had as I ran out and was only taking 20mg towards the end. Thats my target med to get back on when I have the means in the future. Hope it works out well for you!', 'Have a public defender work on your case. To prove abuse, you have to be able to provide evidence of neglect. Have your daughter film what she can and document everything you can. It will take a while but please dont give up.', '^ I skimmed your comment at first, but Ive basically just been emphasizing and elaborating on everything youve said here. Good advice.', 'Thats probably a good thing. Alcohol is a depressant. Im sorry to hear youre going through so much Stress. Drawing and painting is good to get your thoughts and feelings out. Its hard to Hypersomnia when youre brain is on overdrive.', 'Ive been feeling normal as well despite starting a new job and having my schedule change from 4pm to 1am, to a normal 8:30am to 5:30pm. Havent had Initial Middle Sleeplessness for a while. How is everyone elses Initial Middle Sleeplessness?', 'Good when Im good, not bad when Im on the fence or the brink, meh ok when Im bad. The people that actually care will say "Just ok?" The others dont seem to notice the difference.', 'I will definitely keep at it.', 'We were very lucky to be in a theater that wasnt crowded (we went Thursday). I cant imagine going Saturday. Did you have to stand in a long line?', 'Im sorry to hear that :( My dad didnt really believe in mental disorders until quite recently after lots of conversations. My mom wont go to a specialist either. If youre already on medication for ADD, you might as well start with a psychiatrist that can evaluate what youre already taking.', 'It seems to scare you subconsciously. Death shouldnt be scary except on a primal level, the bodys natual reaction is to fight for life involuntarily. I have an experiment of sorts with this. PM me if youre interested.', 'I usually feel bad and say "Ill make it" and apologize. People around me dont know what a loaded question that is and I try to keep that in mind.', 'Are you in the US? (I dont think anyone else says "yall"...so I hope its ok to assume so) Do you have health insurance? How old are you?', 'Not necessarily. Theres a Drug abuse probability that most people live through their attempts with guns and end up either a vegetable or just with severe brain damage. So theres that to consider as well. I wouldnt suggest it.', 'What are the main lies you have encountered throughout your life that keep smacking you in the face? I understand the Exhaustion part.', 'Ive been living with my SO for 7 years today. Anniversary of sorts. Were in an open relationship. My parents divorced when I was 10, I never wanted to get married after that. Never thought about getting married before that. Has nothing to do with my Bipolar Disorder. Everyone has relationship issues and health issues that are all different and still affect marriage statistics.', 'Do you work or go to school? Id probably say something Hyperactive behavior "My Mental Depression symptoms have been getting worse and I think its something other than Mental Depression. I may need some help finding a specialist so I can get on the right meds. The past week or so has been horrid."', 'PM? My SO reads my shit.', 'Who is raping her? Her second set of parents? What else do you know about her?', 'I understand the flood of emotion is sickening, Hyperactive behavior a roller coaster literally upsetting your stomach. It feels intolerable sometimes Hyperactive behavior there is no way your body can take anymore Ache and you just want it to go away. But our bodies are an amazing thing. Ive been so Depressed mood that Ive stayed in bed for weeks, almost an entire month. Just my experience, I know we arent all the same, but I am happy to say I am in a much better place and happy I waited it out. Your entire life could change for the better, you just never know. I am a pessimist at heart, so dont think Im a glass is half full person. But life tends to unfold as it should. I Hyperactive behavior a challenge. What are some things that you used to enjoy that you cant concentrate on now?', 'Happens to me too. I tend to lock myself in the bathroom or in my car as opposed to sharing these feelings and the crying with others. Hugs dont help me, they embarrass me because then I feel pressure to show that the person is helping when they arent. Hope you cycle back up soon and get your motivation back.', 'Hes reading it. This applies to anyone wanting to shoot themselves.', 'I have UHC. I couldnt find shit on their database and ended up with a Depressed mood doctor that specializes in Hypersomnia, not Bipolar Disorder. I called and made a complaint to my insurance and told them the doctor took me off of my medication and I was probably going to end up in inpatient care if I dont find a doctor. Some group called me back that asked me what disorder or group of disorders and a few other questions and they had people in the group call everyone and ask if they were taking new patients, how far out the appointments were, etc. I got a list of two or three back and one worked out. Maybe tell your insurance company that you cant find anyone with their search option and ask if they can help you find someone?', 'My doctor also told me that SSRIs can induce Manic episodes, either in people who are not Bipolar Disorder, but also people who are Bipolar Disorder and not on a mood stabilizer. Ive gone through many different SSRIs, Lexapro worked for me for while when I was younger. Last time I had a dangerous Manic episode, I was on Paxil and no mood stabilizer. That was my experience.', 'Similar here, great grandparents were institutionalized on my moms side. My Dads side doesnt believe in psychology or treating mental illness with medication. I was on anti-depressants for years before I had my first Manic episode. I get support from [r/Bipolar Disorder](http://www.reddit.com/r/BipolarReddit) we can chat here, or you can PM me either way if you feel Hyperactive behavior it.', 'Thank you. Ive been looking for a replacement so long its disheartening. Hope you also find a good replacement.', 'Agreed, highly unlikely. An overdose would be a complete nightmare as well. I wouldnt suggest either one.', 'Yeah, you cant consciously control your brain juices so dont blame yourself. Take a deep breath and enjoy the break in the storm. It has a bit to do with cortisol (not all of course)...Initial Middle Sleeplessness, your "survival mode" also sounds similar to the "fight or flight" feeling. Just try and get your bearings on how you feel now which sounds to be alright for once. I do the same thing. "Wow, I feel sane and in control all of a sudden...now what am I supposed to do to make the most of it..." just try to go with the flow and see what comes your way and take one event at a time. No sense ruining the moment worrying about when you may feel bad again. I tend to be more Phobia, Social when my Anxiety Mental Depression subsides, so I try to do things Hyperactive behavior grocery shopping when Im in an up swing that isnt Manic. I can interact in public a bit easier, budget for food a little easier, but were all different. Hope you enjoy your ~~morning/evening~~ time of contentment.', 'Im sorry I cant think of any good advice. Thats a very difficult situation. Did you get your meds from a primary care doctor or a psych doctor?', 'Im pretty anti-government myself. Have a lot of friends in the navy though. I always wanted to be an anthropological photographer. Found out that you have to work 9 to 5 jobs while working towards those dreams. Over the years my dreams have changed, become more solid, turned into goals. Just dont give yourself a timeline and call it a failure and give up if things seem impossible. As long as theres life to live, theres a chance things could change gradually or in an instant towards the better or worse. Change is the only constant.', 'Feel Hyperactive behavior chatting on the phone?', 'Haha, me too. Over 3 liters a day. Not as a goal or anything. I also found pickle juice to help a lot as well. Congrats and good luck with your new meds.', '* Therapists have low level certifications or no requirements for credentials (similar to counselors).* A clinical psychologist can have a PhD and focuses on diagnosis, then recommends which type of therapy would work best for you and cannot prescribe medication, but may refer to you a psychiatrist for medication.* A psychiatrist will also help with diagnosis, but a lot of them only diagnose within 5 minutes of your first appointment from my experience, then focus on changing medications around until you find the right blend.Hope that helps.', 'Sorry to hear about your breakup. Perhaps a therapist or counselor that can session via Skype or email if you cant find one to talk to in Korea could help. Definitely keep exercising. I tend to bottle my emotions as well, every so often I have a breakdown at night and just spend hours in my car crying. Probably about two or three times a year. You sound very optimistic...youve got that going for you as well. Someone is always around here if you need to chat. Hope you get some relief from your Anxiety soon.', 'Agree with everything [BipolarTypeOne](http://www.reddit.com/user/BipolarTypeOne) said. I also tapered to .5mg Klonopin when I discontinued for a while. I just take it when needed now, so once every couple of days. My SO has come close to Seizures, Focal from Withdrawal Symptoms when we moved out of state and he ran out and had to go to the ER before we found our doctors here. GABA supplements helped for a bit. Might try looking up info about that. I replaced Ambien with Benadryl for a while too. I dont take it anymore however. I take 5mg melatonin as a Hypersomnia aid now and thats it.', 'I have much experience with Initial Middle Sleeplessness. What have you already tried so far?', 'I feel Hyperactive behavior Ive changed in several ways through phases of life. I was not happy with life until I was about 18 and stayed happy for about 4 years. After that it was shit again. I know its all inside of me and I cant seem to control it. I think the only thing that keeps me going is that I Hyperactive behavior a challenge. Im in constant battle with myself for control. Bipolar/schizophrenia can be hereditary. Did you inherit it?', 'Out of all of those things which would you Hyperactive behavior to pursue first?', 'Thanks, I will definitely work on being patient. I never want to have to do this again.', 'Thats a very tough spot to be in. Are you still legally married?', 'Yep, another request for iOS here. I currently use MoodyMe and my iPeriod app to track everything.', 'That sounds really stressful. Do you have to share a bedroom? (I assume) When I feel trapped (especially when I moved out on my own the first time), I usually sit and Crying Reflex, Abnormal in the bathroom or my car to cope. How long is the internship? Do you take medication?', 'Do you have any way to talk to a lawyer? That sounds pretty serious. Do you have a job that offers legal services? I know most dont.', 'Im not Phobia, Social, so I study psychology alone so I feel Hyperactive behavior I can connect with others in my own dillusion. You may offend people, but most that arent superficial can tell you arent doing it on purpose.', 'Like the others say, its different for everyone, listen to your body. But my experience, every medication I take only works for a year or two, then stops. I have side effects when first starting certain medications and they do go away after my body adjusts. Ive been taking Lamictal for about four weeks now and I havent noticed anymore side effects. My main complaint was horrid, traumatizing dreams...so Ive started taking it in the morning instead of at night. If it severely interferes with your everyday routine, talk to your doctor. Maybe you need to stick with a lower dose or switch to something else. Just be as specific with your doctor as possible.', 'Id suggest she talk more to the ladies in [r/Hijabis](http://www.reddit.com/r/Hijabis) It will take a lot of strength on her side and much patient support from others to help her figure out right and wrong. If shes only able to trust the support she receives on Reddit, they are probably your best bet.', 'Thank you for posting. I feel Hyperactive behavior this often. Helps to know Im not the only one.', 'Its very common for most unaffected people to see Mental Depression as just laziness. There s still a stigma around mental illness. People dont understand how hormones are not something we can control, just Hyperactive behavior someone with diabetes cannot control their insulin levels with their pancreas and without medication and even still, because of the illness, Drowsiness is a common side effect. If you and/or your SO feel comfortable talking to them, you may want have a conversation. Maybe ask your SO what they think, if the parents have said anything. Its definitely a legit concern.', 'Even if the memories of molestation are just now coming to the surface, that kind of thing causes trauma and continuous "Post traumatic Stress disorder" that will affect you on a deep personal level including your shyness and ability to socialize with others. Your experiences are very specific and personal to you and contribute to who you are, but know that youre not completely alone either, youre doing your best, try not to blame yourself...everyone fucks up. What kind of pills were you in trouble for possessing?', 'Yep I have moments of clarity and optimism, then I revert back to Mental Depression, grief and Anxiety Mental Depression attacks. Rapid cycling is a bitch.', 'Its similar. Its on a larger piece of paper and spans for a 5 year period. mine does not have my weight or hours slept however. I may start keeping track of that as well, so thats interesting. [Heres a picture.](http://i.imgur.com/1hsuwcb.jpg)', 'Ive had good and bad experiences with SSRIs and SNRIs. One worked for several months after the horrible acclimation period, then one day just quit working. I was also put on one without a mood stabilizer or anti-psychotic and had bad Manic reactions for obvious reasons. The side effects and Withdrawal Symptoms symptoms Ive had after missing just a few doses just arent worth the few months of no Mental Depression for me either. But then I havent ever been hospitalized because of my Bipolar Disorder either. My neuropsychopharmachologist didnt Hyperactive behavior me being on SSRIs though and had me taper off when I came into her care, and with her experience, I trust her opinion. Unfortunately were all different and you just really dont know if SSRIs are right for you unless your doctor has you give them a try.', 'Im going to sound dumb, please mark it from the record. But "The only constant is change." Indifference is good in my opinion. Some situations are better for you mentally if you float through in a Depersonalization Hyperactive behavior state. That might just get you through this. I just dont think you are a waste. Youre very intelligent.', 'Do you know how old she is? If she can talk to her current parents? The best thing you can do for her is probably listen and continue to be there for her if you dont know her IRL.', 'I went to a specialist in neuropsychopharmacology and she was able to get me down to just low dose klonapin once a day and I have been completely off of everything else for 5 months now. Ive been seeing her for about a year and shes retiring in a few months...still hasnt cashed my last payment. She seems to truly care about my condition and not just filling me with pills and getting paid. Just me personally, but Ive noticed that some years are just really debilitating because of my mood swings, while others I just dont struggle as much. There is so much yet to be understood about brain chemistry and hormones. I think my Bipolar Disorder phases in and out as I get older and some years I need more medication than others. This year so far has been a light year, but I wont be surprised if I am forced to go back on more in the future. Hope you find a decent doctor soon that will help you with your wish to ween as well. They are out there, just dont give up and dont ween alone.', 'Youre welcome :) Those are interesting effects for sure.', 'Have you been contemplating Suicide for years? Is there anything in life that interests you more than leaving it all behind?', 'Thats awful too. Im sorry to hear that. Im worried this new doctor is going to trigger me into more cycling. Im just going to cancel and talk to my primary care and keep exercising. Keeping Sedated state and moving on is the hardest part.', 'Same, Ive been on heavy doses of meds for the Manic so the Depressed mood is coming back. I stopped taking the risperdone because it was just too much. Just took my depakote though. Reminds me of an X or cocaine comedown. Most uncomfortable thing ever. Im just trying to squirm the energy away in bed. Good luck to all of you as well. (((Internet hugs)))', 'I used to spend many nights listening to Bush half Wakefulness and half Somnolence when I was 17-18. I was around 19-20 when I went 3 months straight without actual Hypersomnia. Can you get a doctor appointment? They may be able to advise you on anti-Anxiety Mental Depression medication or prescription Hypersomnia aids. Thats the only thing I didnt do during that time.(I love the Deftones btw)', 'Ive been in a stable open relationship for 7 years. However Ive always known I was poly and Im also pansexual and it really has nothing to do with my Bipolar Disorder. Ive gone through medications that decrease my libido, but when Im not on them, its extremely higher than his. Ive technically only slept with two others (one being married) during this time. One thing you should definitely think about is how youll feel when you are at your most irrational. Are you going to be jealous if he sleeps with someone else? Being open works both ways. I think my Dude finally realized I was serious about being open when he slept with my step-sister and felt ashamed. My step-sister told me, so later when he finally had the courage to bring it up, he was surprised I already knew and didnt make a big deal out of it. I also wouldnt suggest one night stands or sleeping with strangers while youre Manic. Ive had friendships for years with the others Ive slept with and trust them. The symptom of being unnecessarily risky during Manic phases should not be taken lightly. Proceed with caution and good luck! :)', 'Totally understandable. What are the most uncomfortable symptoms of the Initial Middle Sleeplessness that you are experiencing? Can you describe them?', 'Im Bipolar Disorder but in a Manic episode. So Id love to chat with you if you want. I dont know why there are not any other comments. But PM me if you feel Hyperactive behavior it.', 'Me too, I reorganized everything in the kitchen yesterday. Started doing keto a couple weeks ago and decided to try and start cooking for myself. Now I just have to watch my spending on groceries.', 'Very welcome. This community has been awesome to me and given lots of great tips and support. Another suggestion to help with diagnosis is to keep track of your mood. Either on paper or by using an app on your phone. That way you can track patterns and medication to report to your doctor.', 'Absolutely', 'Yep, totally relate. I worked for a friend of my dads for a while. She was a lesbian in the military in the 1950s so she was a hard ass. I grew a tougher skin from that experience, but Im still Muscle Weakness when my Anxiety Mental Depression and Mental Depression act up.', 'Positives that come to mind: You arent in jail. You havent relapsed yet. Youre still free *enough* and in control *enough* to get another job just to see how the pigs will find a way to fuck that up as well. I hope you can Attention Deficit Disorder the positive that you have a GF thats at least supportive. If I were in your probated shoes, I would spend those next years planning my escape to another country. If you dont see a way out now, I would make finding a way my top priority. You say you want to leave the country, patience is really hard to obtain but if you have it, youll make it out. I dont think any of the things you have written have been stupid. What others call pessimistic I would call realistic. So I would say your summed up existence is very real and much better than any obituary most of us will ever have. I hope you get the chance in the future to Attention Deficit Disorder to your story more of what your dreams may be. The piece of paper that represents your education may be a joke, but one last positive is that you are nonetheless educated and obviously intelligent, so there is still potential there. Thanks for sharing.', 'How old are you now? What condition are you referring to that you dont have a future? I want to hear about your problems.', 'My SO and I split a hotel room for a homeless (mentally unstable) older man during the holidays last year. We showed him to his room, my SO Ventricular Dysfunction, Left and I proceeded stay and give the guy a back massage. I dont regret it. Thankful I didnt get raped though.', 'The form my neuropsychopharmacologist gave me is "NIMH The Life Chart Method Self/Retrospective Rating Form", I cant find one online to print, but you may mention it to your doctor and see if that one will cover more ground. She gave me two others that just didnt track well enough because I was Confusion on how to enter the information.', 'If Anxiety Mental Depression is the main culprit, you may have to chip away at it slowly and wind down over several hours, try not to focus on the time (I always Panic Attacks when I look at the clock, so try not to think about or look at the time). Computers, tv emit light plus reading all stimulate your brain. Listening to old radio shows or relaxing music help me. My main problem ends up being that I cant get into a comfortable position and constantly toss and turn.', 'Thats awful that she wont acknowledge it and the other person thought you were joking. I hope you can eventually find someone irl you can confide in to help you with that part of your past.', 'Are you self employed? or will you get unemployment?', 'When I took Seroquel, I was so Drowsiness ALL day that I failed two classes. I was so Drowsiness in the mornings that I literally could not drive or stay Wakefulness once I got there the few times I made it. I couldnt focus on the final and that was it. I can totally understand why you have Anxiety Mental Depression. I sure did. Taking a bunch of Lithium wouldnt kill you, so thats probably why he ignored it altogether. Youre more likely to have major liver problems if you drink and take meds at the same time that tax your liver. Hope you feel better soon. Anxiety is a bitch.', 'Im in the same boat. Feeling awful today. Phone interview tomorrow. Been unemployed since February. Ive been putting on a pretty good facade for interviews for several months and Im exhausted. Most employers are looking for examples of where you excelled in your past work experience, so I just try to ignore my current negativeness and recall the good times I had when I was working. If I were you, Id just try to get some good Hypersomnia, but wake up at a decent hour before the phone screen. If you have past work experience, just try to recall what you enjoyed, what you learned from that experience, and what you hope to experience in the new position so you sound excited for the new opportunity. Good luck to you! ', '> the majority of the time they think of me as someone who is going to drop-out or fail in life.Id be Depressed mood too if my parents thought I was a failure before I even finished my freshman year. My grades dropped to barely passing when I started Drug abuse school too. It could be a mix of Anxi

Ideation

Yeah no one really knows what to say when it comes to being suicidal. Its really unfortunate, because that usually stops them from even trying. Im just going to put my mask back on and try to pretend Hyperactive behavior Im enjoying things. And yeah, in my scenario it would definitely be a no as well. I need to get out there and meet more people. Ive never been in a relationship, and thats something I really want, sooner rather than later. I feel Hyperactive behavior 21 is too old to be going on a first ever date :\\', 'Early morning walks. And I Irritable Mood early morning. Right before the sun comes up, when its light out and youre the only one around, its just the greatest feeling. For me, anyways. It puts me in a good mood for a few hours just to see the day start. But if that doesnt work, try looking for joy in simple things Hyperactive behavior it. Watching the stars, listening to thunderstorms; it might take a while, but once you find something that works for you, even only some of the time, it helps a lot.', 'Hey, just got back home. Went and visited my grandmother for the weekend. Was planning on messaging you. Its been kind of a Depressed mood week. Ive lost most of my friends because of this stupid bullshit that Im going through, and Im just frustrated. I dunno if or when things are going to blow over. I messed around in my closet again, seeing if I had the courage to actually go through with it, but I didnt. It would absolutely kill my parents I think. So Ive just been keeping on, riding it out. What about you? I hope youve been doing better.', 'I have seen a Hypersomnia doctor about it, but I didnt tell him I was suffering from depression. For some reason my parents were allowed in the room, even though Im 18, and I dont want them knowing about it...', 'Yeah expectations and comparing myself to others are two of the biggest problems I have. I tend to put other people on pedestals, which definitely makes things harder on myself. It means that any problems there are in the friendship must be my fault, and I just end up feeling Hyperactive behavior crap. Im pretty excited to start DBT though. For the first time in a long time Im feeling somewhat hopeful about the chances of getting over this. It just seems so permanent when youre going through it.', 'Thanks so much for responding. While I do think the hospital isnt the right place for me, it has gotten me connected more quickly with therapy groups and the Hyperactive behavior, which is a good thing I suppose. I just feel Hyperactive behavior being there is a complete waste of time though, especially when it makes me miss my job. My main thing with hospitals I guess is I go in and tell them I feel entirely powerless, so they stick me in a hospital gown, take away everything except maybe a book, and for all intents and purposes show me what its really Hyperactive behavior to be powerless. Ive been around that block a few times though, and know what to avoid saying if I want to stay out of the hospital.And no, I havent heard of DBT. Ive dabbled in CBT a bit, but I hate it, mainly because there are right answers to all the questions. Im willing to give pretty much anything a shot. Ill look into it.', 'Im doing database work for the Bank of Montreal. Updating their old systems and such. Its mainly Excel and SQL work.As for Steam, the big sale ends on the 22nd, so look into it sooner rather than later. There are several incredible games for under $5, and even more for under 10.', 'Thats alright, all the best games are the ones that use low settings and cost under $10. Look into a few things, and if you dont have the money Id be happy to buy you a few of the more choice ones that go on sale. If youd Hyperactive behavior. Just PM me your account name and Ill Attention Deficit Disorder you. Im not sure how gifting works between countries though, Id have to look into that.', 'Thanks for your support, but I just feel so trapped. I cant get over the fact that if I made different choices, if I had gone to the same university as my friends, or gotten proper treatment sooner, or what have you, my life would be much more enjoyable right now. Im just Paralysed by regret, and I honestly dont think it will ever go away. Its just become who I am.', 'The new therapist seemed pretty OK, but it was only my introductory session. I may look into Buddhist teachings more seriously. Im not really a religious person, but I feel every religion has a pretty OK secular morals side to it. Im going to start running again I think. I miss being in even slightly OK shape. I lost a lot of weight recently, but thats just because my appetite has been terrible. I figure if I stick to just drinking water though, I can start eating properly again and keep some of the weight off.', 'Yeah most of my friends havent really said what they would do if I were to kill myself. They just hate talking to me about it for fear that something they say will make everything worse. They dont really understand, and dont seem to be willing to listen, which gets frustrating for both parties. Its just that being Depressed mood and feeling suicidal has just become more or less my identity. Its what I spend all my time doing, and I lose ways to relate to them. Theyre all off in school, most of them still in engineering, and whenever I see them and they start to talk about school I just feel Hyperactive behavior crap. Im immediately filled with regret that I chose to not go to the same university, among a number of other things. And it really sucks, because one of these friends is someone Ive wanted to ask out for a long time, but she gets really annoyed at me when Im in a bad mood and says it makes her feel guilty, and just isnt willing to talk things over. Shes been avoiding me for the past while, which hurts quite a lot. Im the type of person who just completely attaches himself to someone or something, and its just immensely frustrating that I put myself through this even though I know better.', 'Get a Hypersomnia study done. Ive had pretty vivid dreams about some pretty weird things, and have woken up only to not feel rested at all. I finally saw a Hypersomnia doctor, and it turns out I have alpha wave intrusions, a Hypersomnia disorder that basically means my Hypersomnia isnt deep or refreshing. There is medication for this, but I cant attest to how well it works because Im currently trying to avoid it by following a list of techniques to ensure a better nights Hypersomnia. Im still fighting with it, but at least now I know what Im fighting.', 'Im here for you as long as you need me. I know exactly what you Irritable Mood when you say the knowledge that you could kill yourself whenever you wanted is a relief. At least theres a back up, sort of thing. But you do matter. Your problems matter to me, because when I asked for help you were there to provide it. And thats more than I can say for most people I know.', 'Thanks so much. Ill definitely take you up on that. Its been a long day for me though, so Im going to head to bed for now.', 'Yeah Its been a long few days for me, but Ill PM you my Skype info tomorrow. For now Im going to rest up. Thanks so much for the offer.', 'Hey I think you misunderstood, I cant commit Suicide because it would crush my parents. Im not thinking about Depressed mood anyone besides myself.', 'Ive stayed away from knives, but I have tried to hang myself multiple times with my belt. Its just sort of an urge I get, and doing something about it makes it go away. Each time Ive been pushing myself a bit further. My parents have since confiscated my belt however, so Ive been pretty safe for the past week or so. Yesterday I tried with an old tie, but it didnt work nearly as well.As much as I understand the feeling though, I really urge you to avoid doing that anymore. Im also struggling with it, but when I made this post I was feeling suicidal, and talking to people who understand is a really good outlet, at least for me. Next time you feel that way, just PM me. Im always willing to take some time to talk about things. I work during the day, but Im always on and off of Reddit between 6 and midnight. Thats GMT-5 time by the way. Or if youd prefer, I could Attention Deficit Disorder you on Facebook. I check that one more often at work.', 'At what point did I say Suicide was heroic? :| Its just a constant sensation, Hyperactive behavior the ticking of a clock. Its always there, but when you notice it it gets really fucking loud. The thing is, it doesnt matter what Im doing. Im fundamentally a broken person. Going to Africa would just result in me feeling Hyperactive behavior shit in Africa. That being said, since this post Ive seen a new psychologist, whos recommended a new type of therapy for me, called DBT, which Im going to look into. For the first time in a long time, Im actually feeling somewhat hopeful about the possibility of getting better, but well see how it goes.Depression and being suicidal arent things you can just shake off. Its not anything as petty as outside events. Its much deeper than that. And Id Hyperactive behavior to recommend you dont use the words "an hero" on this subreddit in the future. It tends to rub people the wrong way.', 'Im Canadian, so Im lucky in that healthcare is free here. Otherwise this shit would be expensive.', 'I find most things that allow me to think just put me in a Depressed mood mood, music being one of them. I tend to play games instead. It sucks that you feel you cant go to your family. Im currently looking into therapy, as expensive as it is. Ive tried it and hated it before, but I dont have a hell of a lot of options here.', 'I dunno Im just really Exhaustion. Not up to talking much now. Ive been sleeping a lot more recently. Gotta try and get myself back on track.', 'Do you have a Steam account? Theres a big sale going on right now, and if you want to get into gaming, I wouldnt mind gifting you a few things. Ive been very fortunate money-wise. I somehow managed to get a Drug abuse paying job despite my lack of qualifications.', 'Hey, Im in a similar situation. None of my friends really understand why I want to die, and whenever I go to them for help they get Anger at me for making them feel guilty. I think what people need to understand is that Mental Depression and suicidal tendencies dont have any rhyme or reason. There can be triggers such as the ones youve listed, but sometimes there really is no reason for it, its just there. This constant feeling of pain, or regret, or hopelessness, or what have you. So I guess what Im trying to say is dont feel guilty or embarrassed by it, and dont let others make you feel that way. My experiences have taught me that as Depressed mood as it is, friends really arent the people to turn to. Most of the time, they just have no idea what to do, and react in completely detrimental ways. Coming here was actually the best thing Ive done to help in a long time. Im here if you want to talk things over.', 'Thanks a lot. I really appreciate it. Ive calmed down for now, but Ill take you up on it for sure. Its just a really hectic time for me.', 'Thanks so much for taking the time to read this and be there. I just need someone to talk to. Theres no rush, but would you mind just having a long, levelheaded discussion with me at some point? Even if its just over the course of a week or so. I just need to get my thoughts out there to someone who will listen and not freak out.', 'You too man. Where are you from, if you dont mind me asking?', 'Thanks so much for taking the time to read and reply to my post. There have been a few updates since I made it. Ive been to a new psychologist, and hes recommended a new type of therapy called dialectical behaviour therapy for me. I think my main problem is deeper than the circumstances Im in. I think, in fact, its caused most of the problems I have. I dont really know what I want to be, or even who I am. My life so far has just been a set of tracks that Ive been following, and I just chose engineering because it was the next logical step for a successful Drug abuse school student. I dont know, Im just a fundamentally broken person right now, and at the moment my biggest priority is to quote unquote fix myself. I dunno. Im just a fucked up kid at this point. I dont know how to explain it. Thanks for reaching out though. Before I made this post I just felt completely useless, unimportant. I just wanted to have a discussion with someone about, well, stuff. But the outpouring of support was incredible, and actually helped way more than anything Ive done so far. I guess I dont really know what I need, but the fact that people whove never even met me are willing to be there to provide whatever they can has really meant a lot. Sorry I cant really get my thoughts together, and thanks for your reply.', 'Medication to me seems Hyperactive behavior a craps shoot. Im currently on Prozac, but Ive only been on it for a short period of time, and so far its done nothing for me. Ive also tried Remiron, which made me Hypersomnia for untold hours a day, and Clomipramine, which worked really well right up until it stopped. Ive seen so many doctors that its just become a situation of too many chefs spoiling the stew.The weird thing about being suicidal, to me, is that I think that urge would be there even if things were going well for me, even if I was still in school. Its just an illness. I spend most of my days finding reasons to feel Hyperactive behavior crap, and I cant really stop it. It just feels Hyperactive behavior my life is me running up a down escalator. I cant make it to the top, and whenever I get Exhaustion and take a breather, I just go right back down to the bottom. Its just who I am I think. I cant even blame it on circumstances. I just feel Hyperactive behavior a broken person.', 'The way things work is just stupid. The less you look Hyperactive behavior you need help, the more likely people are to be there for you. Its incredibly frustrating. Im really glad I found this community. This post has helped me more than all my friends combined. Its good to have people who can relate, that you can talk to. Its a damn good feeling to be there for someone, and have someone be there for you.', 'Hey! Im doing pretty well. Its been a long week at work. Ive got a new therapist, and Im going to start something called DBT next week, which Im pretty excited about. Apparently its a bit Hyperactive behavior Buddhism. No major plans for the weekend though. We had our heat wave last week, and things have gotten pretty OK here now. At least when its not raining. And dont Anxiety about the game. Whenever you get a new PC you can play it. Ill also look into a few others that perhaps dont take as much processing power. How about you? Hows your week been?

Attempt

>whats the point?well its not really easy for either of us to answer that question. what is the point of life? life manifests itself differently for different people. It is your journey to take ... one day you will discover what life means for you...Things may or may not get better. I cant say. I dont really know you. But I Hyperactive behavior to think that things will get better. slowly, but surely.', 'with all the things we blame might as well do that as well?be a little happy. smile a little. It doesnt cost much...', 'Hey I am here for you. Please tell me what is going on. you know I am here for you. Please try not taking the extreme step. talk to me.', 'Your doc is retarded. Try the suggestions by others', 'Hi, a lot of people arent used to hearing such things! But please dont feel sad about this! Please tell us more? Why are you feeling that way?', '>From Prozac to Lexapro.Lexapro is a drug which has caused problems before! as /u/splinteredruler said! Please do consult a doctor regarding the meds ASAP. ', 'Hugs', '\\^_^', 'you can hide the downvote button using CSS. just a suggestion but it wont work on mobile, still itll deter trolls.', 'Hi. I just want to say your life is worth a lot more than you even know. Stick around OP. You are a good person. You deserve happiness. Lets talk', 'Well. there is this thing. things did get better right??I Hyperactive behavior to think that something good is lurking around the corner. Do you know, its never too late to make new friends! what are your interests?', 'Great to hear that.', 'Oh. I am sort of new to this sub(I actively help in some other places, so I thought I might as well try help here too). Anyhow, thanks for the speedy response. Also, I can get that...anyway for a person who is suicidal, I guess the upvotes/downvotes wont matter that much I suppose. Anyway I upvote everything. Still reading through sub rules and stuff.', 'You are not disgusting mate, can you please tell me what makes you think of yourself as any lesser than so called better humans? we are all equal. can I ask what is making you suffer? is it monetary problems? or is it something else? please do reconsider your views.', 'Thats understandable.I can get how you feel. Hope you feel better than now soon! ', 'That\xe2\x80\x99s a totally normal reaction to losing someone you love. I was wondering, have you heard of the stages of grief?They are, in some shape and at some time, what every person who experiences a significant loss goes through. They are Denial and Isolation, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance. You can learn more about them here: http://psychcentral.com/lib/the-5-stages-of-loss-and-grief/000617 :)John, I know how things have gone downhill: but you can still do what you love - biology...did you consider going back for another interview?', 'Anytime. Am here if you need a friend to talk to. feel free to PM me.', 'The end of a romantic relationship is tough. Musicians have been singing about heartbreak for years and television shows garner Drug abuse ratings by putting their characters through endless break ups, but personally going through a break up is anything but entertaining. Regardless of whether you or your significant other ended the relationship, you have still lost a close connection...If at any point you start feeling hopeless or start thinking about Depressed mood yourself or someone else after a breakup, please connect with a therapist for professional breakup advice. These feelings youre experiencing can be really extreme and it can be really helpful to get breakup advice from a therapist.', 'awesome to hear that you are willing to get help OP! keep that fire in your burning', 'You can still do good. Go to community college.. Work hard. Youll land a decent job', '> I am much more comfortable around people online,nothing wrong with that, we all have our comfortsI am not much of a gamer...but payday 2 was nice. stealth huh? I would probably pick something Hyperactive behavior boxing or saints row =Phave you played anything of that sort?heavy metal sounds Hyperactive behavior an anime name lol', 'it is never too late to make amends and to be better', 'I really think that it is never too late to make new friends or to rediscover yourself. tell me this. Do you have any interests? Anything that you might look forward to?', 'It isnt wrong to seek help mate.You will miss one birthday. better than missing the next many many to come?Best of luck. ', 'Swell. I Hyperactive behavior everything you said!!! Talk to me about those things! ~', 'But what if the dog likes you only', '> s better but everything just turns to shit. Im some kind of fucked up human being.we all fuck up sometimes>I have no friends, my family treat me Hyperactive behavior crap,you got me as a friend now that is 1. lets work towards more.>I was raped by 2 people before I reached the age of 14 and constantly abused by a family member.FUCK. I am so sorry :( If you wanna talk about it you can PM me. also, please read this http://www.reddit.com/r/india/comments/35m3bj/women_of_rindia_who_have_been_have_been_sexually/cr5otz9', '1. your neighbours suck2. dont listen to them. legally its your dog. they cant do jack shit about it.3. I think dogs are <34. can you tell me why you are looking for a new house for your dog?5. You may live long enough to outlive your pet, but for your pet YOU are their whole life. please think about it.', 'You can pretty much trust a therapist. If you can afford it I say go for it. just advice from me.', 'I am terribly sorry for your loss OP. But I want you to know life somehow moves on, and I know this is tough love but after a while...even you will have to try and move on. Dealing with loss of a loved one is quite hard. Try to remember her for all the good she brought in your life. May her soul rest in peace', 'OP, tell me even more about yourself. talk to me. you seem Hyperactive behavior a beautiful human being.

Indicator

Yeah, I suppose youre right. Thank you, stranger, for all of your help. Keep up your hard work, too. Youre good enough to stop.and help someone you dont know, and thats hard to find. Thank you for your time.', 'I appreciate your words. Thank you so much.Its Hyperactive behavior Im a different person when Im depressed. I become a nihilist and a pessimist. I despise the person I feel myself becoming, and then want to end it all. I Hypersomnia a lot. Sleeping is sometimes my only reprieve. Then, I have vivid Nightmares. Dreams Hyperactive behavior horror movies.For instance, being drugged and tied down as my teeth were ripped out one by one with pliers. I remember wanting to scream for help, but being gagged. And, then a dream of being chased but not sure by what. But I knew something scary. Then, when I Hypersomnia, I never want to wake up. My Nightmares seem friendlier than real life. At least the fear is of what is, not what will or may be.Anyway, I really just appreciate you reading my scrambled thoughts. Thank you.', 'Wow. Youre a really good person. Thank you, truly, for caring.I was at a very low low, but Im feeling much better now. I guess my work is going great, and my boss is happy with me. My boyfriend and I seem to be doing well, and I made a new friend at work. Im about to switch from overnights to days in a month, so that should help my sleeping issues and hopefully my spurts of Mental Depression. I found a Hypothermia, natural Hypersomnia aide that apparently assists with Mental Depression by producing seratonin (the same chemical combo in turkey that makes you Hypersomnia). If youre curious, its called 5 HTP. And, while Reddit was out, I, unlike a lot of other redditors, exercised for 45 minutes and stayed within my caloric limit.So, I guess things are going a lot better. Thank you again. If you ever need help or someone to talk to, please feel free to get ahold of me.', 'For me, its Hyperactive behavior the whole world is imploding in my chest. It takes all of my energy, all of my positivity, and all of my concentration just to keep myself motivated enough to try again. But, I think its getting a bit easier; each time I go through an episode, the more I realize everyone elses problems are practically the same. Money, family, love. Im not criticizing myself as much because I know a lot of other people have been down the same road, the same decisions. Were all doing the best we can with what we have.Most of the time, I realize this. But, on occassion, it comes back in force. So, while every Mental Depression is unique, I understand. It really sucks, and Im here for you. PM me if you want to talk more about it. No one deserves to fight it alone.', 'You dont have anything you care about? What age did you first experience these symptoms? Think: Why? What may have caused this? Is there truly no reason? Is it all in your head? Why do you have the urge to kill these people? Why manipulate them? What satisfaction is derived from all of this? Can you get this satisfaction elsewhere?What mostly concerns me is that youre not really giving any reasons to kill yourself other than you fear killing other people. It doesnt seem to me you lack empathy--but, rather, you have a strong sense of it. You desire to protect the people around you from getting Chest Pain by you by killing yourself. A truly apathetic person would not write this post, nor would they take the time to consider other peoples lives. Additionally, if you were truly apathetic, you wouldnt have self-concern. You wouldnt be worried about going to an asylum. You have emotions and empathy. No matter how much youve tried to lie to yourself. And, thats another issue. People make lies true for themselves all the time to fill in holes. What hole are you trying to fill in? What are you compensating for to make these claims?My argument, therefore, is that you should at least hold off on killing yourself until you have a satisfying answer as to why you should do it. You should be fully convinced, without a doubt, that you want to die because of this and this and this reason. You shouldnt need to post on a website about this, you should just do it. Although, dont get me wrong, Im not saying you should. Im merely saying you should explore as many paths as you can before you kick the bucket. Foremost, you should at least pick apart reasons why youre Hyperactive behavior this with someone else. It sounds Hyperactive behavior youre in a Phobia, Social slump. I can garantee you that you werent always Hyperactive behavior this. If Im wrong, then you need to seek out continuous help from a psychiatrist. However, are there people who love you? You should consider attempting to love them back. When the destructive urges come, write them out in a novel (Hyperactive behavior what', 'I love school, but Ive had to drop out of it 4 times. Im 22, Hyperactive behavior yourself, and just finally got my A.A. degree. I found out along the way that I cannot go full time and work full time. Im too poor to work only part time, but I plan on going back to school in the fall with half the credits. Itll take some time, but Ill get where Im going. You can, too.Life isnt cut-n-dry. Everyone has a different path to discovery. Youre young yet--when the time comes to be a true man or woman, youll rise to the occasion because you have no choice. I feel irresponsible and lazy a lot, too. But, in the end, Ive pulled through some amazing circumstances Hyperactive behavior taking care of a very Nausea mother. That was my defining moment. I HAD to work. I had no choice. So, if youre really unhappy with yourself as a human being, get a part time job. Ease your way into working while you can. Pay rent to your father, and show him what youre made of. Then, go back to school. Whatever the decision you make, take it slow and think about all of the angles. ', 'No insurance. Cant afford it. Thats okay, though. Thank-you.

Supportive

Im glad to hear shes getting better, she really does sound a lot Hyperactive behavior me. If it wouldnt be weird, tell her that an internet stranger wishes her luck and happiness. ', 'yeah, Ive tried healthy dieting, its actually how my disorder started :c I realized that if I ate even less and exercised even more, i could lose weight faster! then when i ate too much I decided I could just throw it up. then the binges started. Ugh. Pro tip: dont develop an eating disorder, they suck.', 'I did make an appointment with my old therapist on Monday, but Im not sure if I even want to cure my disorder...Only the binging aspect of it, really. It kind of worries me that Id rather be thin and sad than fat and happy. Depressed binging is the worst, man. Sorry to hear that you deal with it too, but it does make me feel less alone!', 'That sounds crappy. Im sorry you had such a shit day, I hope that lets up soon. The worst thing is when it drones on for seemingly forever. In my experience, the good days get there eventually. I hope they get there for you, too. Im afraid Im not very good with words or with cheering people up, Im just another sad soul on the internet. All I can do is offer my sympathies, and youve got all my sympathy. I hope youre able to hang in there.', 'I hope Js doing better than I am.', 'Logically I know that I wont be happy if Im thin, but I feel Hyperactive behavior Id rather be thin and unhappy than fat and unhappy. In all honesty, I feel fairly certain that I wont take my own life (at least any time soon) just because Im too afraid. I hope the Ache stops for you, man. I cant tell you it will, but I sure hope that it does, and that the days get brighter.', 'I hope you tell her she doesnt need to lose any. And its okay, i dunno my gender either. probably another reason for Mental Depression.', 'It does get better. Its hard, its painful, and sometimes it does feel hopeless, Im not going to lie. But the times where you feel the darkness receding will get longer. There are dark places, yes. and things get bad. But life is worth it. Those moments where you can laugh and smile, theyre worth it. Youre a fighter. Medication and therapy can help you out a lot. Im not sure if you can ever "beat" depression, but you can sure as hell laugh in its face. It does get better. Eventually, the good WILL outweigh the bad. I believe that you can make it there.', 'It was in August. But yes, I have seasonal affective disorder. I guess I know deep down that its just winter but still....everything seems so hopeless.', 'Hey. When I was 12/13 I dated a 15/16 year old guy online. Actually, we dated on and off until a couple months ago. Im 18 now, and while we did dirty talk and all that, I dont feel violated or abused or anything from those exchanges, if that helps at all. I dont think youre a Anger or fucked up, even. To be honest, you seem Hyperactive behavior a young guy with active hormones. Happens. Id say, find a therapist. Itll be fine. You havent done anything they can arrest you for as far as I know. You just sound anxious. Get this shit off your chest, man. Youre not a Anger, or a pedophile. I believe that with all my heart. You do sound upset, and maybe a little lost, and its perfectly okay to feel that way. But you ARE a normal, good spirited guy. I can tell. You deserve love and support--you dont deserve to die, certainly not to die feeling guilty and ashamed and anxious. If you can, find someone trained to talk to, and maybe try to break through that isolation a bit? It might be Depressed mood you, even if it feels safer (Im struggling with isolating myself too!) Im sorry to hear youre having such a difficult time, because you really do sound Hyperactive behavior a sweet guy.', 'Shell be scared, but let me tell you something-if you tell her, you HAVE made progress and you ARE trying. Whenever I tell my parents about feeling sad or triggered, theyre proud of me for being able o tell them. Im sure shell feel relieved that youre able to confide in her. Please tell her. Baby steps. Baby steps.', 'Ive known that I dont identify as 100% female for 2 or 3 years now, and I wish it was as cut and Thirst as FtM. However, I dont really identify as Genital Diseases, Male either. The closest I can come to an identity is agender, because really I dont feel Hyperactive behavior anything. Part of me wonders if Mental Depression has something to do with that, but really, Im not sure.

Indicator

And thats why I stopped taking antidepressants.', 'Dont kill yourself its not worth it, your taking the easy way out. Whatever is bothering you fix it, get someone to talk to. When I was going through hell years ago I wanted to go commit Suicide... I called a Suicide hotline that day and the lady in the hotline told me that this will not only Chest Pain me but those around me. The thought of my sick-disabled mother hit my head and I decided not to continue my plan.That call saved my life, I met the love of my life, I have a great career and my mother is very proud of me graduating from college. It was a dream of her since I was a child... and I am her only child! Everyone is not perfect we all have problems here, cheer up ! :) XOXO http://imgur.com/3aLzP6i

Behavior

Give him chocolate, you cant kill yourself if you eat chocolate.', 'Ehh.. according to my psych lecturer its true, because of chemistry and stuff.

Supportive

Thanks for your support. Im feeling better now; looks Hyperactive behavior it was just a temporary crisis. ', 'It comes and goes, and it doesnt always have a specific cause, per se. Ive been Depressed mood in one form or another since I was about 12, and Im 25 now. All kinds of Phobia, Social Anxiety Mental Depression issues and possibly PTSD due to emotional abuse, according to my therapist.Right now I guess its a combination of feeling utterly isolated and hating myself profoundly. I havent had any close friends outside my husband for the past seven years due to the aforementioned Phobia, Social Anxiety Mental Depression, and I just feel Hyperactive behavior I have to constantly hide behind this idiotic veneer of politeness and submissiveness whenever Im near anyone but him. It feels Hyperactive behavior Ive been wearing the mask for so long that I dont even know who I am anymore. I dont recognize myself, and I hate this cowardly stranger thats wearing my face. Im starting my fourth year of a masters degree that was supposed to take two and I still have no idea when Ill be done. My scholarships have run Thirst and I cant really afford to take any more classes right now and my student loans will come due soon. Im not even sure I want to do this anymore. Everything just feels so hopeless. Sorry if that didnt make much sense. Everything is all twisted up in my head. Thank you for asking, though.

Ideation

Whoa!So psychedelic drugs do not negatively affect your Schizophrenia?', 'rejection and (sexual) jealousy are a huge part of my problem, tooI dont have any advice, though', 'So will you be posting the clips soon? Or wait to compile it all and post the entire documentary later?', 'Hell yeah its a fuckin liewhy the fuck would it get any better? Its easier for things to get worse, so thats what happens.', 'thats awesomeyoure luckydo you get Mental Depression episodes too, though?', 'how did you survive all the attempts?', 'Great postAre you familiar with psychedelic drug experiences and near-death/out-of-body experiences?This sounds familiar, and many of them say they experience higher dimensions. Thats probably what you experienced.', 'This is not about cannabis. It is about cannabidiol.', 'http://forum.grasscity.com/incredible-edible-herb/1051569-simple-method-isolating-extracting-individual-cannabinoids-badkittysmiles.htmlseems kind of complicated though', 'I think my Delusions come from unresolved guiltor maybe just an imbalanced brain', 'Yup, CBD is short for cannabidiol.And I know it works, personally. ; )', 'did you just post this here because you know youre actually good-looking and wanted us to tell you?or do you have a severe body dysmorphic disorder?', 'Would you rather be handsome and still have no success with women?Because thats my situation.', 'if it felt good it was probably mania/hypomania', 'age is always relevantso what is yours?', 'I dont even know if this is going to help but I believe that is called the thought insertion delusion.Do you have relatives with mental illness? You might not have just a simple Mental Depression Hyperactive behavior most of the posters here. Good luck.', 'I believe the feeling youre referring to is known as "delusional atmosphere"', 'only sociopaths/psychopaths', 'neither do I, but face the facts, your Suicide is gonna ruin someone elses life', 'Sorry youre going through thisMy aunt has the same diagnosisDo you at least maybe enjoy the Manic episodes? : /I hope thats not an offensive question and I apologize if it is', 'so youre Psychiatric symptom and Depressed mood at the same time?mixed state?', 'just jealous of guys with beautiful girlfriends, basically', 'At least youre not schizophrenic Hyperactive behavior your brother', 'And what did you do at 13?', 'I had anxiety/depression for a very long time before my Schizophrenia dx', 'wouldnt "no one on Earth cares about you, including your family and friends" be worse?', 'I miss my prodromal days more than anything...', 'Is she physically beautiful?I hope thats not an insensitive question.', 'what is that permanent problem?method?', 'Goodbye', 'It seemed to eliminate all of my schizophrenic symptoms, but caused pretty bad symptoms Hyperactive behavior OCD and Akathisia. My Ventricular Dysfunction, Left arm still has some Akathisia after being off the drug for about a year now.', 'I dont post here often and I dont even have any advice unfortunately, but I hope you dont do itI dont have any friends either', '>I consider myself very attractiveStay for that reason alone. I dont care if its superficial. Its a great feeling to be noticed by strangers.I am also completely unmotivated. Havent had a job in 6 years.', 'well you were probably Psychiatric symptom/Manic when you wrote this postwhich is awesome, but most peoples brains dont ever get in the right chemistry for hypomania/mania', 'Ive read that people with Bipolar Disorder disorder are more likely to commit Suicide than anyone elseWhat do you do every day when youre Depressed mood?', 'Im in the exact same situation. Except race and sexuality play a big factor as well. It inspired my username here.I have no idea what to say to help you, except that I know this is called *obsessive love* or *love obsession* and is a common symptom of mental illness.', '"Behavioural and neurochemical models suggest that CBD has a pharmacological profile similar to that of atypical anti-psychotic drugs and a clinical trial reported that this cannabinoid is a well-tolerated alternative treatment for Schizophrenia."Natures cure, in my opinion.', 'so its really that good huh', 'You sound a *lot* Hyperactive behavior me', 'Im sorry you feel this way. I can definitely relate. People always say Im quiet. But thats just because I dont know how to bullshit.By the way, did you get this title from the Nirvana song?

Ideation

Even if I had insurance to actually see a therapist, I probably wouldnt go. Not only because the idea of it scares me, but Ive heard of many bad experiences with therapy. Id be afraid of being locked away or something.I tried taking small steps to help my Anxiety Mental Depression. Last year instead of taking online college classes Hyperactive behavior I usually do, I enrolled in on campus courses. The first day of school I ended up having a huge Panic Attacks attack and I almost blacked out. I cancelled my classes the next day.', 'I feel selfish because I want to die. Like a little kid who pouts in the corner because he didnt get what he wanted. Im being selfish because I dont try to make things change, because Id rather just end things. Theres just so much Ache and sadness and it just keeps getting worse. Not better. Ive been told to see a therapist before. But Im Social fear to even do that. Im afraid of people. The only reason I have friends is because I met them online. And theres a sort of anonymity you can have when you talk to people that way. Even when I met my ex in person for the first time, I was awkward and quiet. When Im online I can pretend to be happy, funny, interesting... someone Im not. But I cant fake who I am in person. Which is basically why I got dumped. My real life self wasnt the same. All the Ache and sadness I have is completely my fault. And if I end it, the problems go away forever.', 'Im really sorry you have to go through Ache Hyperactive behavior that too. My ex was my best friend above all else. For three years we talked every single day. Its sounds silly that I was 22 and he was the first person I could honestly call a friend. When we started dating it felt amazing. In love with my best friend, it was perfect. Id never been so happy. But that all changed in the blink of an eye. Literally a minute after my first kiss, he broke up with me. "I value your friendship, I still want to keep that intact." Thats what he said. Five months later and he has stopped talking to me altogether. I lost my best friend. And my Phobia, Social Anxiety Mental Depression is at an all time Drug abuse now. Just the thought of talking to someone in person freaks me out.When we were still together, he was helping me with my Anxiety Mental Depression issues. Hed encourage me to take baby steps to make it better. But now, I dont see the point. Ill still be alone.', 'I always make up excuses for why I cant do something. But if I really wanted to fix things, Id just do it. I wouldnt let my fear stop me. What does that say about me? I give up on everything in life. I dont think that will change. Im so mentally exhausted, I cant even think of one single reason to live. I dont care about anything anymore.

Ideation

you see, I am in a lot of clubs that I absolutely enjoy. I do have a lot of friends. Its just i am awkward in a way as well. I also try making new friends but nowadays, people are jerks. I try my hardest not to think of her as well. In fact, Ive been going towards new things to do instead of thnking bout her. I dont see Suicide as an option for now. I dont wanna die but im hating how i live', 'Also, I am not the best looking individual and I lose courage a lot. Truth is, I dont even get bullied or any of that bullshit. I find school as my safe haven. I make excuses to stay in school instead of going home and playing. I try to resist, but cannot stop the urge. I used to have lots of self esteem, was never shy, athletic, and always happy. I am a class clown at school, to mask who i really am. I just feel Depressed mood and I feel Hyperactive behavior Suicide is the only option sometimes. I dont even see a future for me, just darkness. I fear one day I will kill my self with a rope and I really want people to help me on this. I cant call the hotline because my parents will find about it and comfront me.I feel the only person I can talk to is the internet.

Ideation

I went through this as well. During my depression, it was easy to be sad and use the sadness as an excuse to justify my actions. Although I was in pain, in a way, it was comfortable. I try to keep myself physically busy to hinder the temptation of being sad and cynical. Its pretty hard, I hope you go through it well.', 'I hear you. I woke up in ER after half bottle of vodka and few vicodins. I laugh about it now. Failing to kill myself help me abandon all my responsibilities and try a care free life for once. It was great, but eventually, I realized a person cannot live without tasks or work.', 'Nowadays, it is easier to make money on YouTube. It is not easy, but easier. Be consistent and be productive. It is playing a game, but when it becomes work, it is hard. Put up few videos every months and eventually, you will get there.', 'I feel the same way. No desire or passion towards anything. While Im walking through the abyss, others tell me how Im good and say that they are jealous of my skills. I only know those things because, ever since I was a child, I looked for my passion. Interesting, but never fascinating. I live day to day with simple pleasure such as food and naps. Who knows, maybe I will find something to do later. ', 'I feel exactly the same right now. I wish I didnt exist in the first place so I dont have to Anxiety about killing myself. It feels good to know Im not the only one. There was one thing I ever had a passion for, but my parents were not supportive, rather harsh. However, if you still are in college, take a semester off or a year to cool down. Perhaps travel, work, or learn something new. I worked at a factory and it was more Depressed mood than college. Thus, I got through college. Although I have nothing go on with, one thing is true: you have more time than I do. Perhaps, maybe, you can find something to live for instead of becoming a sad pretentious walking sarcasm Hyperactive behavior myself.

Attempt

I dont know you. You dont know me. But tonight you have the right to say you saved a life. There I sat, contemplating putting my 1957 Colt Huntsman to my temple and ending it all, but your response rang through to me. Sure, my world may be dark and grey right now. It has been for a long time. But those overcast skies are dotted with moments of sunlight. I may not miss the debt I have, but Id miss making a morning cup of coffee and watching the sunrise. I may not miss the struggles I face, but Id miss going for a nice bike ride on a beautiful day. Your response rang true to me. Reminded me that it isnt the quantity of life, its the QUALITY. Even if those moments are few and far between for me, theyre worth enduring for. The world may be a bitter and dark place. Perhaps its small moments Hyperactive behavior those that make it a little brighter. Thank you, stranger. Thank you for your time and your caring. Ive put down my arms, for the sake of tomorrows sunrise.Youve saved a life tonight.', 'Its just... I watch the news. I read the newspaper. I see what gets posted here. The world is so filled with such suffering, such misery. The frailty of the human condition exploited by those in power. Im not trying to turn this into a political statement. What Im saying is that darkness has so blanketed our species. If I believed in god, in the devil, in heaven and hell, Id believe the devil had won. My problems, my issues, seem so petty in comparison to the blights of others. But they are no less significant to me. The problems of the world compound the problems in my world. The relationship was simply the straw that broke the camels back, so to speak. She was important to me, but I had learned long ago to not invest too much into anything. I look around me. I see I have friends, family, loved ones. In that respect, I am lucky. But I see none of them. Either by choice or not. I know theyd mourn my passing. But how much more of my torment can my psyche take before I break? How much more of the same meaningless, trivial nonsense can I endure? Statistically is is proven that those in poverty have very little chance of escaping it. Im not saying that money is the end-all, be-all.... but it amounts to a daily struggle I am unsure I am willing to endure for that much longer. I have a gun and a bullet. The Sedated state darkness seems alluring at this point. So why not? Why not end the pain, this existence?

Behavior

No', '> and theyre causing you to break into tears. This got me. I neither viewed it as an inducable variable/fact for my reason to create an image of my personhood nor didnt I consequently ever view me outside of myself to determine the meaning of that fact. Treating it Hyperactive behavior a dream instead, something that, as I am writing this am starting to do all over again, has given me the ability to recreate a false, purely on reason based identity. Your comment got me, but now it is being buried away as we speak... I just got to try this, it *has* to work out. FUCK, I know it wont. .. fuck this shit... I feel Hyperactive behavior an attentionwhore writing even this sentence. Even wanting to apologize to you guys feels wrong, I want/ need to get out of here, this never happened. sorry', 'This thread made me come up with the analogy between me or even suicidal thoughts in general and the 5 stages of grief. Im in the stage of denial, and stating or knowing that I am does not change the stage I am in. I still do not want to accept the reality that there is a part of me that thinks dying is a great solution to a problem I cannot see or rationally find. I want to kill that part of my personhood off. What am I suffering from? Why am I suffering? My suicidal thoughts are just a Ache in the ass and Im denying my entire personhood, self and feelings as a result. I am killing my identity, replacing it with one where I am emotionless, and nothing but my ideas and reason will constitute me. Again, similar to how my reason is contradictory with my feelings, this acknowledgement of both my identity which I want to kill and the stage of denial are contradictory too. Its fucked up. ', '> I usually consider Suicide to be redundant.This. It is such an unutilitarian thing to do, I instead fantasize about plans to perhaps kill Kim Jong-un so I wont Chest Pain my family and hopefully do the world some good too. If I am going to commit Suicide, it will be done in such a fashion that the most amount of people will get the most amount of happiness from it. Jumping in front of a train for example is an extremely selfish way to go, traumatizing the engineers and holding up hundreds of people. ', 'How did you even go about forcing yourself to do such small tasks? My schedule is beyond fucked up, with on average a 2-3 hour day-to-day difference in the time I go in and out of bed. Dinner often becomes breakfast and breakfast becomes dinner. Im thirsty/hungry as fuck right now, but I cant get myself to get out of bed and drink/eat something- Im skinny as fuck. I stopped making my bed in which I spend 20+ hours of my day and just Hypersomnia under and on some sheets instead. I had a bike worth 350 dollars in the city I study, which I lost/got taken by the city because I couldnt comply with the law that stated that bikes must be used every 8 weeks. I have subscriptions and contributions worth 10 dollars a month still running but are unused, because I cant get myself to post the letter to cancel the membership. ', '> It seems Hyperactive behavior youre fending off Mental Depression with apathy.Yes, I am extremely apathetic. > If youre at a university you should see a counselor.My suicidal thoughts are Hyperactive behavior a dream to me. Not because they are, but because I push them to be Hyperactive behavior that. Maybe Im in the stage of denial, denying that these thoughts occur at all. Talking to a counselor would make it too real; then it becomes reality, a real problem. ', 'Maybe you are just gifted? Not sure if you are, but just make sure you absolutely know yourself before you kill yourself. Because there are likely many unknown unknowns about yourself which, if you do figure them out, may give you something to work with. I had been diagnosed with some shit too, but medicine didnt seem to work. I asked myself *why?*, came to the conclusion that the nature of medicine is to alter x (dopamine levels, for example) to a state in which it is healthy, but if x was healthy in the first place, then it could be that your problems are caused by something y unknown to you. You even said: "maybe Im looking for somebody to change my mind, to give me that "Eureka!" moment since nothing before has worked". The eureka moment should not only be the above, but also the understanding of the significance that you were looking for one in the first place. 5th of January? Fuck that. That is far too less time to figure shit out. Therapists are generally dumbasses whose knowledge does not extend beyond to what some course told them to know.

Ideation

It sounds to me Hyperactive behavior you have a lot on your plate and I understand how difficult that can be. I can also understand feeling Hyperactive behavior you havent accomplished anything yet but you must remember your Respiratory Distress Syndrome, Adult life has literally only just begun. I didnt have my first job until I was 18 myself. As for the problem with relationships, you need to realize that, even though you were in a relationship with another person who you truly cared for, something some people never get to experience, you still knew what should be expected of the other person in a relationship. I myself suffer from Mental Depression and major clinical Anxiety Mental Depression attacks. The Mental Depression sucks but the Anxiety Mental Depression is worse. When Mental Depression bouts hit me, I only either get Exhaustion and unmotivated or, a few times a year, suicidal. But when the Anxiety Mental Depression attacks I get are common in my weekly life? That can get even worse. My therapist calls it my "train," as in "train of thought." Ill start with some problem Im having, and in a split second, my mind will follow that "train" to some highly illogical conclusion. For instance I can be having a problem with my friend. Lets say we have a fight. Well that friend doesnt Hyperactive behavior me anymore -> They will tell all of our mutual friends Im a bad person -> They will realize I am indeed a horrible person -> I wont be able to focus on school because of having to Anxiety about my friends not liking me anymore -> Ill have to drop out of Uni because of bad grades -> I will have to go live with my mom -> Shell kick me out when she sees Im actually just useless -> Ill be homeless -> ill die of starvation or drug overdose in some back-alley.So as you can see, these sorts of ordinary problems a person might experience, my mind warps it into: My friend and I had a fight -> Im going to die homeless in a gutter somewhere. When I got on the right path of being able to tell these bad lines of thought from what was actual logical interjection, it helped me get past a bit of what was happening in my own life. I no longer Anxiety about when the next Anxiety Mental Depression attack is going to come because worrying would sometimes set off the attack in the first place. As for worrying about feeling Hyperactive behavior a drain on your family, please trust me when I say that you can bet that your parents wouldnt have helped pay for school for you if they didnt want you to go. Prove to everyone, but mostly to yourself that you will not be made to play the role of the victim. The problems we face now are only the problems we are facing now. Theres no way to logically know what will hold two or three years down the line. Actively seek out good changes and then they should, I say should because nothing changes how unfair life can be, lead to better things. Self improvement is a great way to negate negative feelings. Dont make yourself better for other people, but make yourself a better person just to show yourself that you can amount to something. Right now you are thinking that you yourself are the worst thing imaginable. Try and separate that part from the main you. Critique simple changes into your life, Hyperactive behavior getting a simple job, doing good in school, building healthy habits and relationships, and set goals for yourself. If I had enough space here Id tell my entire story if only you would listen. Short of it is that I came from nothing. My father was an abusive drunk/drug user who would always beat my mother, my two siblings, and myself. The first time I tried to kill myself, I was 10 years old. I tried to hang myself on the school monkey bars because, on top of the other stuff, I was always bullied at school for my weight. And wouldnt you know it? The shoe lace broke as I jumped because I was too fat to even kill myself for being fat. Now where am I? Im living my dream at the age of 23, studying abroad in Japan working on my degree in History. Still never had a meaningful relationship, but Im working on it through other areas of my life. Still fat, but I dont give a shit what other people think how I should or shouldnt look. If I decide to lose weight, Im going to do so for myself. If I want to become a balerina, I will. Life is about taking the punches, getting back up, and saying, "Is that all you got?"If you want to talk at all, honestly Im on Reddit almost every minute of the day. Just message me and we can talk about whatever you want. :)

Attempt

As far as dealing with something fucked up Hyperactive behavior what your going through my story is completely different but I know your pain. 3 months ago I was standing in a hospital room with my 2 dead sons who had just been born an hour earlier. I was in complete Shock as they had urgently rushed my wife into and OR and I had no idea what the fuck was going on. She got through alive but had some horrible near death experience. That and losing our twins was enough to make some huge changes in her outlook. I know shes Depressed mood and Im pretty sure she wants to leave me.', 'Im 30 and am still waiting for a chance to help someone through some of the experience Im gained through certain hardships. Eventually I found I strength in "hey the world around me has shit on me so much and in so many ways but Im here and I have this (sunset, meal, house... whatever I was thankful for at the time)." I still forget it sometimes, Im even still Depressed mood to some people because Im Stress about meaningless stuff sometimes. But if life can kick you when youre down and youre still here wanting to do good by others... youre a strong person.Buddhism, eh? I havent studied much but there was this one time. Someone had given me a copy of the Teachings of Buddha while I was hitchhiking. Didnt think much of it (really more focused on being messed up). However one night I ended up stranded in the middle of nowhere, no food, I had lost my sleeping bag partying in the last city I was in. I was scared, hungry, helpless and lonely. I started reading about the Shakyamuni Buddha (as it was the only book I had) and it just brought me such peace and comfort. I dont know why. I havent read any since Buddhism but whatever it was that night it warmed part or my heart/soul or whatever. ', 'Well I cant imagine you would pray and then think "Wow, I enjoy praying so much suddenly life feels great." People at the hospital wouldnt really make that much of a difference by telling you not to either. In fact, Im just some random on the internet so whatever I say is fairly pointless too.Im not here in this subreddit because I feel great about life or could tell you everything will be okay. Im giving myself 1 month to try and fix my life then, if that doesnt work, a couples months to work through my bucket list. In the meantime Ive made myself a silver space suit and am going to go around places dancing to daft punk. Ive taken up graffiti. This world can be boring and Depressed mood but if Im going to leave Im going to enjoy whatever time I have left.', 'Wow! Ok, this is intriguing stuff. "his curator lands among the adjectivesof your favorite city" To be honest I was just enjoying r/trees and the depth of the first poem was so beyond my current state. Give me some time to connect with this and Ill reply with how I experienced it. Maybe sometime Sunday.', 'No, it doesnt get better for some people. But those people also mindlessly go through the same day doing the same thing for the rest of their life. Tell me, what Abnormal behavior things have you done? If youre going to kill yourself think of how free you are; you can do anything you want because nothing matters. You dont have to Anxiety about fucking up your future, offending people or anything. Take a couple days to do things differently than you do everyday, take some time to be free. ', 'The best poets had little connecting them with other human beings. Would you share anything with us?', 'Dont Anxiety about disappointing your family right now. Focus on yourself. Stop spending all your time at home.Where did you run away to? Did you just hide at a friends or did you go adventuring? Are you still in school now or are you off for the summer?', 'I often feel disconnected with the world even though Im not specifically suffering in anyway. Remember the days where maybe you just walking along listening to music (or something else seemingly insignificant). Maybe youll see some leaves swirl in the wind or a stranger does something nice and suddenly everything feels right. ', 'Today I lost a family member to Suicide. I honestly hadnt seen him for years and we were never close. I know he went through hard times, divorce, losing his wife, hardly seeing his kids and then losing his job (only remaining purpose in his mind I suppose) leading up to it.My wife and I have also been through many hard times. Were together and its better but its taken a whole lot (including one attempt on my part but I really just couldnt do it).Maybe you know you can win your wife back but you should also know you can put your best into it and it may not work. If youre thinking "If I cant be with her Ill die" youll probably lose her because thats denial and hopeless. If youre thinking about killing yourself then you are free from risk, you can be selfless, adventurous, spontaneous and thrilling because if it doesnt work out theres nothing worse that can happen compared to what youre thinking about. Just dont be obsessively Abnormal behavior and obliviously hopeful and things will get better. ', 'Hey, I just came over to Suicide watch because I need to talk to someone whos struggling. Im very sorry to hear about your wife and I Irritable Mood seriously sorry. I have tears for you brother and wish I cold just give you a hug and say it will get better. EDIT: Im going to keep going below but I just wanted to say that first.', 'When I was in Drug abuse school I was that kid who would run away all the time. I just couldnt deal with my problems and there was nobody to help me. Running away isnt a good solution because if you just run away youre not dealing with anything. On the other hand if you go and spend some good time alone, maybe deal with some challenges (finding places to eat, sleep, etc.) and just being with yourself, its really good for your mind and self. Its not anything wrong with you thats making you feel Depressed mood, its the world around you. If you get some interesting time to yourself youll find youre stronger and more lovable than you would have imagined. ', 'Dont Anxiety about contributing to the lives of others... not yet anyway. In the hardest of times theres really only ever ourselves to deal with. Lots of times focusing on others or surrounding yourself with others detracts from self (especially when you dont see value in yourself). Years ago I had what I thought was a good sized, solid group of friends. Ive always had issues relating to others and the world around me but found through drugs and partying people found me entertaining. When my drug use became a problem I quickly realized how few friends I actually had. People who I had seen every day for years, saw me in a time of need and decided to ignore me entirely as it would be too uncomfortable for them to try and help.There is a reason for you to exist but neither you or I know what that is right now. Even your post title shows a strength and intuitiveness thats not really common. Youre at an extremely low point yet still thinking of the importance of helping others. Theres a stupid saying "calm seas dont make good sailors." Just Hyperactive behavior an easy life wont make a good person.You can get through this. I dont know how but I know you will. And one day someone will cross your path who youll be able to contribute to their life in a positive manner *only* because you understand this pain. If you need to vent, PM me anytime. I may not respond right away but if your plans are long term-ish we at least have that much time to get to know each other better.My name is Atomyk and I dont know you but I love you.', 'Well this doesnt sound written to me but I have gone through something similar. Most of the time people get to be blissfully ignorant of their own weaknesses and short comings. Every once and a while someone Hyperactive behavior yourself will do something so stupid they can no longer ignore these issues. Sometimes it ruins a person and sometimes it stars a journey into the deepest layers of self becoming in touch with your weaknesses, fears and truly being aware of self. From there you see all the walls, masks and games youve made to protect yourself and youll start recognizing the Muscle Weakness and the walls in others. From there you can really become an amazing, warm and loving person. Its quite a trip my friend but if you take it you can be one of those radiant people that others feel a connection with just through simple small talk.

Ideation

I was in the same situation a year ago - and im so happy that i wasnt able to commit Suicide! really please dont do it!i feel so helpless...trust me, i know how that feels but everything will get better, mate', 'hey man - excuse my bad english - im from germany.but id Hyperactive behavior to tell you again that you really should not kill yourself - im 16 years old and i tried to hang me up but i didnt make it because i fell in Panic Attacks - this was my last try and i talked to some people and changed the way i life, got some order into my stuff/got some stuff to do etc and now i feel stronger than before i got Depressed mood just tell me and i will listen to you and do my best to support you in this situation', 'Hey you i wanna be your penpal! : ) im male, 16 years old and had a Mental Depression (if its over yet) for around one year and now im feeling way better and id Hyperactive behavior to help others because some help would have been awesome <3 ', 'it helped me a lot to think about my grandparents because my grandfather died a year before my birth and he invested a lot in my future even though he didnt now ill be born a year after - same for my grandma, she wouldnt live longer if id have commited Suicide and maybe my parents too. I just couldnt do that knowing that i would destroy my very small family

Behavior

Trying to talk to my friend. Hes drunk at another friends and has no transportation. What frustrates me the most is he said to call I needed him and when I did, he asked it I was sure if I needed him. ', 'Theyre 1500 miles away and our relationship had been strained for some time, so its not really an option. ', 'Portland. Im fairly active under my main account which is why I posted on an alternate account. ', 'Its nice to get it all out there. But still a bit hopeless. Im considering checking myself in tomorro q', 'I live in Portland. And have literally $30 until the 28th. Hes pretty much as broke as I am ', 'Already tried. He basically blew me off (typical northwest flakiness) i felt Hyperactive behavior a fucking inconvenience for asking.Ive tried talking to my mom, she said I should ask god for guidance (Im an atheist) unfortunately I am an only child. ', 'I can walk to the hospital and thats where Im headed now ', 'Thank you so much for your support. I wanted to let you know I was out of the hospital. ', 'Ive been medicated, Im currently on Xanax but it hasnt really helped. And neither have any of the other medications Ive been on. I cant afford a therapist and because of the hours I work, finding a free counselor has been practically impossible. I live about 1500 miles from my family and going home is really not an option due to my finances. ', 'I dont mind the rain. And sure, it would be cool. Its usually easier to reach me on my main account as I rarely check this one. Ill shoot you a pm with it

Behavior

I had a plan with a knife too, and when push came to shove on my pre-meditated time and day, I didnt have the courage or guts or willpower or whatever to do myself in. You dont want to die. You said it yourself, you need some help. If you wanted to die youd already be dead.', 'How you look has nothing to do with having a good time doing things.', 'Call this overly simplifying the problem of friends, but it is never too late to learn. Find something you Hyperactive behavior doing, do it, and if you want to be around people who you can get along with / get along with you find a way to do it in a group setting. If youre interested in Jazz find a bunch of venues and try to talk to people. "Hey there, by any chance are you in to the jazz scene? Okay, well I was curious if you know about any other shows." "Hey there mr. Comic book cashier. Do you know if there are any groups or clubs that meet to talk about latest releases?""Mr. Bowlarama dude, are there any leagues where I could play with more serious bowlers?"Friends are people you do things you both Hyperactive behavior together. Some things work better online (over-analyzing every new episode of The Walking Dead or celebrities who just got boob jobs), but nobody and nothing is ever too late to have friends.To comment on your age, youre being melodramatic. Youre 20 now. If you died of old age at 80, thats 60 years or 3/4 of your life. Thinking that 1/4 of your time has been wasted or squandered, thats really nothing. If you lost 8 minutes out of a half hour TV show (22 minutes of effective show), thats tolerable losses. But if you choose to not live, you just sat through 8 minutes of wasted commercials and turned the TV off before you could figure out if the TV show was amazing or an overall waste. You know what the first quarter of your life has been, but you have no knowledge of what the rest will hold, only hunches and guesses.', '*The only point is kids, procreation, furthering your genetics.*Despite all the other good points you made in your post, I think this is the beginning and ultimately the crux of your argument. I used to think Hyperactive behavior you, and feel the same way, and had crippling Mental Depression too, but it all changed and Ive successively better and better years from one little secret.I stopped giving a fuck. I stopped caring. I quit giving a damn about anything other than me.You mention travel, right? I travel, and I do it because I want to see something cool that is different from anywhere on the west coast (I grew up in Vancouver, kind of Hyperactive behavior your northern brother). I travel and I dont take a camera, I travel and I send maybe one email halfway through a one month trip, usually to let my next-of-kin know Im still alive. I dont travel to meet people, I dont travel to show people where Ive been, I travel to see shit that I think is cool, and eat food thats tasty and not american-ish.You seem to be in a rut of caring what other people think. You care that other people are monsters, that other people think and do not say,and that other people want you to sacrifice yourself for nothing. You care that other people think theyre better than you, that other people expect things of you, and that other people engage in hypocrisy.Im not going to tell you what to do, but Id Hyperactive behavior to give my two cents on what to try. Try looking at things a different way, a more personal and selfish way. Making somebody elses life better is not going to make yours, making YOUR life better will make your life better. Dont do anything you dont want to do, and dont care what other people are doing. Figure out something that seems fun, and engage in that instead of what is "supposed" to be fun when drinking coffee from a two-tailed mermaid.No matter when your life ends, whether its a week from now getting hit by the bus, ten years from cancer, or fifty years when you cant hack it anymore, the only thing that will matter to you is what you did. If you did things you did not enjoy, your life will have no meaning. If you filled your life with things you enjoy doing, or seem fun, then you will die fulfilled. I play pool and lots of video games every day. Some call it a waste of a life, but who cares about other people, am I right? Find something that seems fun to you, not what is "supposed" to be fun.', 'Im going to address your problems point by point. I will label them in what I think the order of priority is. Ill give a very brief pre-amble of my life.I just turned 25 in October. Ive been Depressed mood since the age of ten, and thought about Suicide since 13/14. I got a girlfriend senior year of HS, went to university, and dropped out during my 2nd semester. Said GF Ventricular Dysfunction, Left me a week prior to our one year and she shacked up with a friend I introduced her to. I spiralled hard, tried to take my life, and was in the psyche ward for two weeks. Struggled with Mental Depression for about two years after that, suicidal included, but things are stable now.**1. You will not be permitted to live with your parents/you do not have a job.**This is what you need to deal with right now. I personally think your parents are being little shits for threatening to kick you out at your lowest, but no matter what you have to have a solution. In the event you are going to get kicked out, you need to find a place to live. Try to rent out a room from somewhere on kijiji or craigslist. People have to be looking for one more roomie, and if you can score a cheap place to live for a little while youll get freedom. Not the same type of freedom you think you have had, but the freedom to be away from a parental structure that seems Megacolon, Toxic if they arent fostering your well being.**2. You are dropping out of University and do not have a means of financial support**This is a pretty obvious issue, and something you should be able to remedy fairly easy. Youre going to be on your own soon, and youre going to need to keep yourself afloat. You can bug /personalfinance on how to make it work, but any sort of minimum wage job for a while should keep you afloat in your new dive. The easy key is to try to work somewhere close to where you live. If you have to walk, bike, take transit, whatever, do it. As much as the job may suck, its sort of a necessity to help fix the other issues eating you up. Once you have these two done, as hard as it can be, as much as it might eat at you at night, this is when the hardest is over. What comes next is the easy part, the part that you dont have to work nearly as hard on to still get results, the Phobia, Social aspect.**3. You have Social Anxiety and its hindering your chances at friends and prospective lovers**The first thing Im going to do is steal an idea from Savage Love. Im sharing the link before I quote him. Granted youre not a meth addict doing orgies, but the root question is valid.http://www.avclub.com/article/get-it-together-209246*"Would you date you? If you wouldn\xe2\x80\x99t date someone in the condition you\xe2\x80\x99re currently in, GLC, then it\xe2\x80\x99s highly unlikely that anyone else would. The idea that there are millions of single people seeking romantic relationships with train wrecks is a fantasy promoted by Hollywood."* Social Anxiety Mental Depression is something I had for a while, and its something I learned my way through. Im going to say here and now if you dont have any friends, dont bother Panic for girlfriends. Girls are and can be fun, but if youre not the person who cant have any friends, youre in no shape to find girlfriends. Im not saying this to be Irritable Mood, Im just pointing out an oft-overlooked aspect of girls.Girlfriends are Girl-Friends. The same skills you will get to make friends and be a cool guy are the same that will be used for Girlfriends. If youre stuck at a minimum wage job, youre going to be surrounded by people. The key to getting through the day is to have something to talk about. Talk to other people, ask questions. Nobody is going to bite your head off if youre curious how long theyve worked there. Nobody is going to snub you for asking what they did with their days off... unless theyre a dick. Striking up conversation is pretending to care about somebody elses life and padding the imaginary resume of yours. If you dont have any interests and just Hypersomnia or masturbate all day, youre not going to have any redeeming qualities to talk about for any guys/gals you run across.Friends are hard to make. I think personally I have Hyperactive behavior two or three, but a lot of acquaintances and people I get along with. Its tough, it sorta sucks, but if you are interested in something youll eventually find somebody whos into it too. The reason youll find somebody interested in similar things is because of this little secret: As long as you dont kill yourself, youve got time. Youve been alive for 18 years, you should easily have another 36 years (at least) to find people who are into the things you are.To your final paragraph, heres my $.02. Suicide is always a way out, but its almost never the best way out. You may feel Hyperactive behavior pressure is getting to you and everything is Drug withdrawal syndrome down, and Ive been there before (countless times), but given enough time a solution makes itself clear.', 'I cant really provide much insight but if you want to join the military, I vote Navy. Navy is cushy in that youre always in the same bed, you have a floating kitchen and hospital always on hand, and the bigger the boat the less the seasickness.', 'I will throw my $.02 just Hyperactive behavior others here. I will address the Ex and the school/coursework.You are Drug abuse to meth. Your ex is Drug abuse to meth. Youre trying to get off the junk, so you get sober for a bit. Youre doing alright, but you occasionally deal with your ex who is talking about meth and getting Drug abuse and the feelings associated with it. Is this healthy, is this keeping you clean and well? No. Being around negative and destructive people will bring you down with them. Maybe when youre well past Mental Depression, maybe when youve truly nipped it in the butt, you could talk with him again. For now, dealing with people who are Megacolon, Toxic is not worthwhile.Furthermore, youre 18. You will meet a LOT of new people later on in life. Youre done dating this guy, youre past dealing with him, cut him off. Theres thousands of other guys around where you live (probably). Theres no reason to hang on to people who are not good for you own personal health.Furthermore, with school, I cant comment too much. I can say that you may be able to handle school better if you werent Depressed mood. It can also be depressing if all you do is Hypersomnia-eat-school-lounge. I know in my history of being Depressed mood that when I get down I get inactive and lethargic. Physical exercise (going for a run) is a great way to de-stressify yourself and tackle problems that come up. Movies are great, but movies dont have the same satisfaction as a body Exhaustion from a long run or some Abnormal dreams pool swimming. If you can avoid people who are dangerous and liable to take you down into their spiral, and if you can find a bit of an escape and healthy Stress relief from your school, you might find yourself better equipped to tackle the stressors of life.', 'How often have you made the effort to the two good friends to hang out or do something together? Most people suck, and often times they will not be the ones to call you first, text you first, or make plans to do something first. This doesnt Irritable Mood they dont want to hang out with you, it just means they have lives of their own. Sometimes I get so busy I lose track of some of the people I have hung out with from time to time, and sometimes they lose track of me. Life can be pretty busy at times, just because youre hung up over them not trying to make plans to hang out with you, doesnt Irritable Mood theyre feeling the same way. The older you get, the more you have to actively try to keep the friends you have lest you risk letting things fade apart.As for the female persuasion, Im going to tell you something I was told from a girl I met at a bar once. I was infatuated with a girl, and the situation was... a little similar. Unrequited affection. *"I fell in love with her, being my super shy self, I never told her how I feel to this day because I know how it would turn out, she has no clue about this"*By not telling this girl how you feel, because "you know how it will turn out," you are taking away her freedom to make that choice. At some point you will realize there are only a number of finite options you can make, and at no point is it permissible to be mad/upset at her for any of these.1. You dont tell her how you feel about hera) You find acceptance in yourself for only being a friend to this girl, orb) You cease being friends with her because it hurts too much.2. You tell her how you feel about hera) She reciprocates your feelings and things progressb) She is pushed away by your expression and...ba) you two remain friendsbb) you two stop being friends.There is one thing you know, and that is you are **not** certain how she feels. You can make educated guesses, you can base your decision off your observations. You do not know what this girl will respond because you have not asked her (youre not a mind reader), so its unfair to assume shes going to answer a certain way and hold it against her for that.Leaving this place will not solve all your problems. Leaving this place will be saying that you refuse to answer them, and youre going. Its Hyperactive behavior walking out on a test, nothing was solved, everything was Ventricular Dysfunction, Left blank. Your life is yours, you can make whatever choices you wish, but theres a lot of things youll miss on the test of life if you leave it blank too early.', 'I totally love the first half of your post, and I only read it after my own response which is pretty similar. I think were pretty similar in doing whatever the fuck we want to do without questioning or being questioned. Way better said than the paragraphs I glued together.', 'Do you mind expanding on that IranRPCV? To play devils advocate and pretend to be OP, how can you justify the reality of his importance to us? I have a feeling thats going to be his knee-jerk question, and I think its fairly valid to ask.', 'Theres a big difference between going for a drive with the intention of going off a bridge and actively, actually turning that steering wheel to do it. Every day for a month I drove the same highway to work, and every day there were three checkpoints where I could *"drive off a bridge"* as you put it but I couldnt. The actual will to end my life was not there, and it was the worst my Mental Depression got, knowing I couldnt end my life even if I wanted to.What changed over the years were a multitude of things, but the answer that works for me is the one that you describe in your own post. *"No one cares."* The moment you stop caring about other people, and its obvious to me you care very much, the more you can care about yourself. If you want to sun-tan naked then be damned all the people who stare and judge. If you want to eat your face off then be damned all the whispers and murmurs. Being an Respiratory Distress Syndrome, Adult human is relatively simple, its autonomy in the day to day of your life and having the final say in any decision about yourself. You cant control other people, but you can control yourself. The control over yourself you can try to exert is finding things that dont make you hate yourself, and repeating those actions instead of the ones that do.Finally, Ill address your last point head on.*You dont care, you never have cared, you never will care.* Youre absolutely right. I dont know you, Ive never known you, and I never will know you. The same is true about patrick in the UK, Franz in Germany, or Anne in Texas. You cant bleed your heart about each of the ~100,000 people a day who die, only those who you care about immediate to you. Beyond that, what we do, what Im doing, is just throwing my two cents into the bucket and maybe somebody will find it shiny enough to take with them.

Attempt

Im glad I made you laugh. Honestly Im a strange person filled with hate and love and I have very strong opinions about many things. But the thought of anyone committing Suicide saddens me greatly. Theres always another way. always. For example- and Im not suggesting you do this- I once read a very inspirational story about a homeless guy who deliberately committed an offence and got caught. While he was in jail he used the time to better himself by completing a degree and lined himself up a job for when he got out. Theres always another way around a situation. If you ever feel Hyperactive behavior someone to talk to, pm me. Im also available on most Phobia, Social networks. ', 'please dont kill yourself. ty

Supportive

You will. Just think of something positive that makes Sedated state and happy, Hyperactive behavior a beach or a gentle breeze. You will be okay :). Whenever you start panicking, just remember that youre in control of your situation and you can get through it. Always, always breathe deep and think calmly. Bring peace to your mind :).', 'Breathe slowly. Try to focus on something positive. I know you dont Hyperactive behavior living with family, but dont let him control your life. You have friends here to help you :). Were here for yoj., and I dont even know you.', 'Youre 20. You still have a life ahead of you. Life is horrible, but you gotta grab it and open the doors.', 'I know what youre feeling. My ex-gf basically ignored MD, and we had been together for 7 months. I felt horrible, Hyperactive behavior those 7 months ultimately meant nothing. Im telling you, live. I know its very hard, but ending it is not the way to fix things.Please stay alive. Please?', 'Its not a problem, thats what we are here for. Lots of people need a hug or just someone to talk to :). I feel as though you will do well :). Please be careful and remember, a Sedated state mind.', 'Ive been emotionally attached to someone younger than me (Im 24, shes about 16-17.) Ive never looked at child pornography and havent downloaded any. Yes, Ive had...thoughts about this girl. But the reason I do not act on those thoughts is because I honestly care for her. Not being able to see her smile and knowing that I caused her suffering. The thought of it makes me deeply sad.I can say you are on the right track to helping yourself, not by saying youre a freak, but by admitting that you do have an issue and it needs to be taken care of. Im sure the link below could have helped.Understand that you ARENT alone. There are people here that are willing to help you in any way they can. :)', 'I do. Look at your Aspbergers as a gift. A lot of great people had it, Hyperactive behavior Einstein :).I have a friend who has it, and it took a while for him to gain his Phobia, Social confidence, but he did. And he feels a lot better. I cant gibe you therapy professionally, but I want you to know I am herhere :), and so are others :). You are not alone friend.', 'Im glad. Try to think positive. If you feel down again, you can talk to me anytime ya want :)', 'Youre very welcome :). Im glad that youre feeling better :D', 'I understand what youre going through.Im 24, and my mother didnt exactly make the best choices (premature), and my sis took care of me since I was 8, and then I legally loved with my grandma until 18, when I legally became an adult. I have a Depressed mood job in terms of making money. My grandma treats me Hyperactive behavior a child, says I dont know anything and such, it really annoys me. We argue a good bit. Had a gf for 7 months and then we broke up. I feel trapped in some ways.There were/are days when I ask myself why I wake up. Doing the same things everyday.Ive drank myself to Hypersomnia once, and it was horrible. Ive had a set of friends Ive known forever. They helped me slowly gain confidence. I know we dont know each other, but I want to help you in any way I can.I feel your pain. I may fall Somnolence but I will reply ASAP. :)

Supportive

I work at a Suicide hotline and have had to call rescue many times for people and advised even more Hyperactive behavior yourself to contact the authorities in very similar situations.Depending on your location the responders and procedures may vary a little but in Texas when we contact the police for a welfare check they will respond within 10-20 minutes, what they walk in on greatly depends on the reactions. Also, sometimes it isnt just the police, sometimes mental health professionals and the ambulance come along as well. They will assess the situation and talk to her to evaluate how she is doing. If they feel she needs help they will transport her to the hospital. If not they will do their best to alert a family member/roommate of the situation and advise her to seek out help if she feels she needs it. It should be 100% anonymous. If they ask for your name give it but just ask that you dont tell her. They are not there to bust someone for anything, that is not to say they wont. That varies from cop to cop and also if the gun is being handled or possibly seen.But the thing is, death is a much longer sentence than any unregistered gun charge. You could also call some local psychiatric hospitals to see if they have any welfare check programs (some do but its rare)And alert someone else of your concerns. Does she live with her parents, boyfriend, roommate? Try to talk to someone else so they are aware of what is going on as well. If you decide you dont want to call for a welfare check yet. Id see if you could get her to at least talk to someone. A trick I use a lot is to break it down for them. Do not say they need help to get *better* because they do understand that that takes months-years. Just ask them to meet with someone once, make one phone call. Baby steps. Give her the numbers to your local hotlines, you dont have to pressure her to call but just so she has them. She may reach out for help on her own. And most importantly, make sure YOU are ok. If you need help or support of any kind find someone to lean on.', 'You have so many possibilities ahead of you. You got into med school, thats a whole lot more than most people can accomplish. Its going to be hard to finish school; I did not go to med school so I am not sure what the options are but you can do it. you may have to get creative or re-structure your life, and you may have to sacrifice sleep/social life etc to finish. but that is the life of a grad student.If medicine is something you are passionate about you just need to find a way to rekindle that passion and youll get a second wind.As for the girl situation; if she broke up with you over your penis size then good riddance; you dont want her. You have a lot to offer the right girl. Even if you are not well endowed there are plenty of other ways to sexually satisfy someone and plenty of men who are unlucky in that department who are happily in a relationship. Take it from a girl, if you hone your other talents you can make her forget about your size. Youre in med school, you sound very intelligent, honest, and self-aware. Grad/Med school school and your early twenties is a transitional period for everyone in one way or another. But you are 21! I promise you, that is so young. In the next year even so much will change. You will look back on this in July of 2013 and hardly recognize yourself, and you will do that again and again. Some years you may miss the previous you and others you may be elated you made it through that year. As for your looks/social skills, non of that is permanent that can all be fixed if it is really as bad as you say, but often times we are our own worst critics. ', 'If he called and mentioned the firearm. I was under the impression that it was more something he didnt want to alert the police of but that may be discovered in the process. Nonetheless if someone is threatening Suicide and youve Exhaustion all other options, I would still alert the authorities. ', 'Heh, therapists deal with a lot of patients Hyperactive behavior that and are probably very used to it.My advice would be to schedule one and tell them just that, see what they say they can offer you.What is it you are hoping to gain from a psychologist?', 'I know at my center we all answer the calls a bit differently; you can always try back until you get a greeting you feel gives you a comfortable opening. Me personally, I do what you want and usually say "How are you". or something along those lines. My suggestion though is no matter what they say, just say "Hi". We get every single kind of greeting you can imagine, Hyperactive behavior crying, Sedated state and cheery, Violent cussing, drunk slurring etc. Saying "Hi" is all you need to make that first connection, from there they should most definitely ask how you are or why you are calling. Dont feel bad if you feel Hyperactive behavior you have to try multiple times. Depending on the hotline, odds are the counselor wont even know it. I have some callers that love to talk to me and hate to talk to some of my co-workers and will keep calling until they get someone they Hyperactive behavior. Just different styles and comfort levels. I do the same thing with phone calls, I almost always write a script of at least the bullet points I want to hit. Maybe try that; if you can think of things bothering you and list them, even if its something silly that is just bothering you today that will at least give you something to go off of. Or be honest, say youve never called before and you dont know how it works. That happens a lot more than you think. Its scary reaching out for help, and I completely feel for you, just be patient, keep the #s handy and when you need to, call, then if you dont feel comfortable, hang up. No big deal, you can always try again later. We get some frustrating calls some days (prank calls, sex fetish calls etc) I know I would love to be able to talk to someone Hyperactive behavior you and help you however I could, even if its just listening for a few minutes. My most common starts to the call are:"Hi""I just need someone to talk to""Ive never done this before, can you tell me what Im supposed to do?"or they just jump right into why they called barely giving me a chance to say my name. haha :) There is no right or wrong way. ', 'You could suggest they try to find a local Survivors of Suicide support group if they want something more personal and on going. ', 'Im a crisis counselor and this is, in my opinion, bad advice. If a person needs psychological help, often times there is no other way to get them the help they need then by forcing them into a 72 hours psych hold, and the only way to do that if they are an Respiratory Distress Syndrome, Adult and have not committed any crimes is to involve the police. The first thing we tell someone who is calling about a suicidal friend is to take care of themselves first. You dont want to put yourself in harms way, or in a situation where you arent comfortable, could potentially witness something traumatic or harm a friendship.No one likes the police, but most cities are pretty good about understanding suicidal threats (sincere and otherwise) They are trained in crisis management, something OP, to the best of my knowledge, is not trained in. It is unfair to ask a friend and even a relative to intervene in some situations and in MOST of those situations they could be the worst person in terms of what her friend needs.The police absolutely are there for that, thats exactly why they are trained and have specific programs for these situations. ', 'Right, but they cannot commit someone for that, and OP (or someone) would need to have reported her for possessing one. I meant more along the lines of drug use, violence, drunk driving, and so on. ', 'Nothing that grieves us can be called little. A childs loss of a doll & a kings loss of a crown are events of the same size. ~ Mark TwainThis is one of my favorite quotes. Dont ever feel Hyperactive behavior you shouldnt feel one way because someone else has it "worse" than you. There is not a universal rubric on which to measure suffering. ', 'There doesnt have to be, if nothing can be pinpointed then they can still help. I spent most of my therapy just going over my weeks, good and bad and discussing relationships. Sometimes they can help you figure out a "cause" if there is one. Or just help you with the ambiguity. ', 'Ive had a therapist most of my life and I just completed my BS in Psych pursuing grad school next.For me and my depression, my psychologist literally saved my life more times than I can count. Each experience is a bit different and it depends on the type of psychology they practice but I have only had one bad experience with a psychologist in 25 years and they were court appointed. (haha) I would call them and ask about your insurance, they can tell you how much is covered and so on. As far as what to expect; In my experience the first meeting will be just a general get to know you sort of session. They will ask about your life as well as any specific reasons you came to see them. This is to see if you BOTH think this is something that will work. Its hard to say how a specific therapy session would go without knowing what type of psychologist they are but my best guess would be that you would meet weekly/biweekly/monthly (depending) where they would ask you various questions or you could just openly talk. They would give you tools and advice to try and apply in your life. And what was always most important to me, offer someone who is in no way involved in your life, they dont have a stake either way and they are there is validate and support you. It cannot hurt. ', 'Id bet something went wrong with the *67, If a # is blocked there is no way for us to unblock it. Believe me, there are times we definitely wish we could to save someones life.Again, its my opinion the counselor shouldnt have called back, it is not 1-800 suicides policy by any means to do that. But, sometimes a counselor might feel its needed. I would disagree with them wholeheartedly. As I said, the job requires that we understand what is and is not within our control and sometimes people have a lot of trouble with that. Some people are upset when we ask if we can call the police, or actually do it. but you need to understand what our services are for; we are there to talk and help you through things but we are not going to sit on the phone and listen to you kill/Chest Pain yourself. We are legally required to call the police if the situation merits it, and at my center its our policy that if a call is terminated and we believe the person is in real danger that we call the authorities immediately, we never call back the caller unless they contracted with us to do so. Im sorry that your friend doesnt trust them anymore, hotlines can be a great resource for some people, but it sounds Hyperactive behavior he doesnt want the help we can offer. We have very limited resources, we cannot spend an hour with each caller and we cannot be a voice to listen to while you harm yourself, nor can we contact a friend or family member about the situation. The only avenue we have to physically intervene is the police. Its good that he sought out a professional counselor as they have many more resources and availability to work with him and I hope he is doing better. ', 'I am a call counselor for NSPL as well as various local hotlines. I understand its really hard to make that call, but we really are there to listen, and we allow you to guide the conversation. We arent going to dig into anything you dont want to discuss, if you just want to call for referrals thats what well give you. If you are lonely and just need someone to talk to well give you 15 minutes to just shoot the shit. What is it that makes you nervous? I assure you its 100% anonymous and we honestly wont judge you. If you have any specific questions about protocol, what info we ask for etc. feel free to ask me.Im also here to talk if you need to. ', 'This greatly depends on many many factors. I work for a hotline and 1-800-Suicide is one of the lines we answer. Yes, we have caller ID, but there are easy ways to block it that actually do work. It shows up as "0" on our computer. As far as getting called back, the protocol for that varies greatly from counselor to counselor. If we believe the person is actually in the process of harming themselves, we are required by law to report it. Normally we will just call the authorities. We have no actual way of tracking a person, beyond the white pages. We call the authorities and give them all the information we know. Now, for an unsettling call, its hard to say. The training at my center as well as my personal beliefs are that they need to agree to a follow up call (which is pretty common) these are set up in advance and we will call back 1 hour, 2 hour, 24 hours etc etc. To check in and see how the caller is doing. Usually after giving them some piece of advice to go try to do in the interim. Its my personal opinion that if you just werent getting what you needed, were still upset, didnt promise to not Chest Pain yourself and the counselor called you back because they just wanted a "happy resolution" then they were overstepping their role, big time. There needs to be a trust and confidentiality maintained. I have gotten those calls where the person either hung up or was still distraught when we terminated the call, and they suck. You end up thinking about that person for a few days hoping they are ok, but thats one of the downsides of the job. I dont call them back if they terminated the call, obviously what I was offering wasnt working for them, Im not going to force it down their throats.Especially since all us counselors have different counseling styles. We have a lot of callers call numerous times trying to find a counselor that can offer what they need/want. (They can usually figure out who is working pretty quickly) We arent going off a script, please if you ever feel Hyperactive behavior you need someone to talk to dont let one stupid, counselor on a power trip trying to assuage their own Guilt stop you from reaching out. I promise you there are those of us who can be helpful and respectful. Im sorry if that counselor made you uncomfortable. Just know that that sounds Hyperactive behavior an edge case to me, and Im tempted to tell you to report them, if you got their name we can track it to whomever was working the shift, no matter where their center is located. Im here to talk if you need it. And I wont track your ISP, :o)', 'For the line(s) I work at which includes NSPL. It depends on your carrier, just call them and ask how 1-800 #s show up on their bills. For us, the # appears but it doesnt say "Crisis Intervention of City". and there is never a charge.As everyone else said, there are numerous online services as well, and most crisis lines also have chat services now. ', 'Im a crisis counselor and a lot of people wonder the same thing, will it ever end? I, too, battled major Mental Depression disorder and suicidal thoughts throughout my adolescence and then again in my early twenties. The biggest difference I noticed the second time around, once I acknowledged my Mental Depression was back and started taking steps to get better was that I had history that said I could do it. I had pulled myself out of it when I was 18 and I found happiness; yes, my Mental Depression did return but I was already ahead of the game and I had a lot of tools to help me cope better the second time around.I always tell the teenagers that I counsel that its especially hard when you are Depressed mood and a teenager because you havent yet seen how drastically life can change, how much you will change. My Drug abuse school self wouldnt even recognize my college self. You are lucky in that you are 17, if you go to university or not; your life will go through so many changes in the next few years, you wont even believe it.You just need to prepare for the changes. If you want to go to university, then do everything you can to get there.

Supportive

They did! Ill respond to them with my concerns and such, thanks for checking in, I was feeling a bit alone today :/', 'I dont have a smartphone sadly :(', 'I will, thanks! Is the offer still open to email and such?', 'And Im doing OK-ish, Stress about college and somewhat irrationally worried about losing friends and wondering who I can share my feelings with :/', 'Another thing is that since the summer I feel alone, trying to connect with old friends but theyre either away or busy or just dont answer for the most part. It seems Im lonelier in the summer than when Im in school.', 'Im not sure what to say other than PLEASE unload your guns, throw away the bullets (or lock them in a safe, or something) and call a hotline. And in my case in universities you generally have to be persistent in getting help. I know when I was in my worst period I had to be put on a waiting list the first time despite voicing extreme suicidal thoughts.', 'Sure, why not. Im feeling pretty much alone right now. ', 'To clarify, by unload I Irritable Mood remove the bullets from your guns. Im not sure what the proper gun terminology is for that.', 'Im doing ok but been better...laptop got stolen at a party and feeling eh...watched a movie with some friends though. Thanks so much for checking in, howre you?', 'I have MSN and facebook.', 'Thanks for your help, Ill take you up on your offer :)', 'Bilal. I may have explained it to you in an email.', 'Here is me.http://imgur.com/j0u1AxQ', 'whats bbm?', 'One other thing Im fretting about is that Im 20 but never had a girlfriend before, and feel a bit lonely now :/', 'Thanks, this really does help, I have trouble recognizing small victories ', 'And sorry to triple post but Im trying to find a balance between staying connected to friends and coming on too strong :/', 'Ah I see abot the PMs, didnt see it. Still appreciate the advice though.', 'Im studying biochem, hopefully to get into the medical field as a pharmacist, psychiatrist, anesthesiologist, or radiologist. I hope it pans out though.

Indicator

Im not saying she doesnt matter as a person. I just see a lot of kids with the FML attitude, and over what? "I didnt get an ipod for Christmas, FML!" Really, an ipod that will be out of date in a few years and your whole life is ruined. I saw money issues as a problem, but honestly those are her parents concern. Dont take on problems that are not yours. Dont measure yourself against other people. There will ALWAYS be someone better. Measure yourself against who you were yesterday, and you may not always win, but you will get better.And finally, I was saying find a better mentor to hang around than her parents. Teacher, coach, who knows (probably not people off the internet) But learn about life from people that are successful at it, or something, anything...', 'Im an atheist that doesnt fit in too. Cynical, single, I think I understand your pain. It may suck, but I guess I look at it as faking it and following blindly, being someone you are not, would be wayyyyy worse than being you.I think you also have to think about that its still winter, and some people get seasonal effective disorder from lack of sun. Get out and get some sun if you can. Secondly, V-day is coming. It puts extra pressure on everyone, not just the single people. It all passes man. As far as motivation. Get a couple of 5 hour energies and pop one of those in the morning. Without them sometimes I dont get out of bed till I have to work. With them I get so much more done. Its not just the caffeine that helps.', 'I reddit. Even if you steal your buddies gun and go out into the woods someone is going to find the body eventually.This is what I see from your post. There is a party going on but instead of connecting with people, you are alone thinking of killing yourself because you dont connect with people. kind of a conundrum...So youre a smart guy, maybe. Things have always been easy for you in life. Making friends is not always easy. Dont Crying Reflex, Abnormal about it if you dont get what you want. No one has to give it to you. If you arent making new friends at the party, try a new circle of friends and start over.I dont know what you look Hyperactive behavior anything else about you, but try putting effort into your appearance and hygiene. When meeting new people dont talk about depressing shit Hyperactive behavior this. It can put people off. Then go out and do something social, even if you dont Hyperactive behavior it. Be in a joyful state about how much you hate it. You dont have to do it again, but you really just need to try.', 'I Forgetfulness to mention Costco sells these for much cheaper. Hyperactive behavior 80 cents each. You might not need a membership if they are classified as pharmacy, otherwise find a buddy with a membership and stock up.', 'I reddit. Not sure I can offer much help, but you have self esteem issues. Its obvious. A long time ago I was in the car with my dad listening to npr, and Dr Laura was on. She was talking about self esteem and how it really is just that. Its the esteem you give your self. It doesnt come from other people.If you cant work and they wont declare you disabled (which Im not sure would even help because its based on past income) you got have a problem. If you figure out how to make it through life without a job let me know.', 'You sound out of control, or your life at least. I think you have to love yourself more than anything before others can love you. If weight is a problem, you really have to ask yourself which do you love more food or not being over weight. Start by cutting out soda, and fast food. Take some time to walk or bike or some activity you enjoy. It will come eventual, be patient. You need to find something that makes you feel good about you and stop looking for it from other people.edit: found your pics and you are not what I would consider fat. Second part of my comment still applies. And exercise might help you feel better emotionally.I had friends that were really good people in Drug abuse school. I never understood why people would hangout with other people that treat them Hyperactive behavior shit. Its just the world because years later I really dont have close friends now. You still might find one or two though.', 'yeah you think the grass is greener, but going to big schools = big school loans. Although, degree does not equal Drug abuse paying job. Community colleges are not bad choices. If you are the straight A student, dont Anxiety about not having a job. If not, then you could be working a job building experience and then using that degree to qualify you for a promotion in a company where people already know you.I cant really comment sexuality thing. Personally, I dont Anxiety about telling people my sexual preference. You feel Hyperactive behavior you have something to hide. I really dont see why people need to know. I think a lot of people make it their identity. What makes them stand out. If you are with a person to standout, you are not really with that person. Then again on second thought, just say you are gay then you can play the gay card pretty much anywhere and have things handed to you.I agree with stuckey3 that its partly and esteem issue. Its self esteem, not the esteem everyone else gives you. you just need more aspects to you life than school and sexuality preference so when 1 falls you have something else to feel good about.', 'You people are great at putting works in my mouth and poor intentions as well.Im saying dont put so much pressure on yourself, because of all things in my life personally, I cant attribute any of them to anything that happened when I was 13.', 'You are 13! Im 34 and I will trade you my life for your straight up, car bank account, age, ect. Nothing matters when you are 13. You can fail school and you know what happens? you get to do it all over again. Seriously even if you get kicked out of school you can still find a job, a SO, some place to live, and just have a life in general (a happy one too).Actually, I think your problem is your parents. They have bad habits that cause problems instead of prevent them, they freak out about them, and over the years you have learned to freak out about them mimicking your parents. Your Mental Depression and Anxiety Mental Depression is a learned behavior when it comes down to it. You could medicate it, but can you medicate a learned behavior? You need to spend time with people that have good habits, and learn that shit.', 'if you have money, look nice, and can hold down a conversation... Go to a strip club. Seriously, the customer is always right. If you are not sure, just ask the girl, she will tell you. They get money out of it. Its a temporary fix, but think of it as training wheels for the real thing.Edit: and if you do do this and get to know a few of the girls, bring cheese cake for the girls. Bitches love cheese cake.

Supportive

So, lets say that its possible to reprogram your brain, but not to give you a different one. Would that be something you could, possibly, consider?', 'Ive been in your girlfriends spot before. I treated my previous girlfriend pretty much the exact same way until shed had enough. Its such a contradiction - people with BPD do everything they can to find someone to be with because it gives them meaning and distraction, then we turn around and similarly do whatever is within our power to destroy the relationship. Its a vicious cycle - and people Hyperactive behavior you and my ex are the ones that suffer from it. I finally had to start looking after myself when I realized that I didnt want to take part in destroying another persons life again. I became proactive in my mental health - and now Im much better as a result.Sadly, someone with BPD either gets help themselves, ends up in an institution or prison, or commits Suicide. Hopefully for your girlfriend shell get help on her own.', 'Sounds to me Hyperactive behavior youre trying to fill an internal void with external stimuli. People who often long to be with someone (even if they have no clear idea who that person should be) are really just substituting the internal emptiness they feel in their own lives. I know, because I did it for 4 years with my last GF. You arent happy with yourself/dont feel you have any meaning - so youre looking for someone or something to give you that meaning. Youre going to need to find a counselor to help you get through this Mental Depression, but sometimes even turning to a friend or family member helps. My mother helped me through a lot of really tough shit, and I had a great support structure of friends/co-workers that I literally couldnt have made it without.Oh, and exercise. Run a few miles. Go hit the gym. I know it sounds absolutely ridiculous - but it helps a LOT. ', 'Socializing and talking gives people the feeling of being normal. Most often, people who are suicidal tend to isolate themselves, which is cyclical because Mental Depression ruins your motivation - without motivation its hard to get out of your rut - so you inevitably end up getting more Depressed mood which can lead to suicidal thoughts.Having said that - dont be a dick. Buying someone a beer and showing them that you care is a wonderful gift. Perhaps you should spend more time trying to enlighten other peoples lives rather than trolling a place people come to for help.', 'There are clinics available that can help you.. you really arent alone in this. ', 'Thank you for attempting to turn what was a humanitarian gesture into your own personal parade of fighting against the specifics of the irrelevant.Needless to say, Ive already setup several meetings and have been talking with people all day long. Think its wrong all you wish, because Ive been doing my part to better humanity, while youre stuck in minutia, have been proven wrong by all that have posted against you, yet still try to defend your tireless opinion.', 'Even just doing some fun not-so-structured activity Hyperactive behavior basketball will help. I play with my boss twice a week during lunch - and it really helps get me back focused for the rest of the day. I understand your Ache wrists problems so that kind of sport might not be good, but go run a mile or two every morning (you know how important having a structured schedule is for people Hyperactive behavior us) - youll see a vast improvement. Ive led some BPD support groups (with the assistance of psychologists and psychiatrists, of course). Just Hyperactive behavior with everything, they are hit or miss - but youll never know if you dont try. The biggest thing I can tell you is to be totally honest. Those people are not there to judge you, they are there to help you. We had people that would come in looking for something very specific, so theyd manipulate their stories to hear what they wanted, not what they needed. I completely understand not being able to keep ALL of the negativity away - but you have to remember how much of your perception is based on your imbalance. Things that might not be a big deal to most people (your wrists are causing you Ache - it might be nothing) we sometimes manifest as the end of the world. The reason for that is because we are based on the things in life that give us structure and control. Something you can typically control is your career, and if you no longer have that semblance of control, it lets your mind spiral into the extremes of the what-ifs. Try acupuncture. Its a bit uncomfortable the first couple of times you go - but its a truly moving experience, and it helps so much to relieve a lot of pressure, anxiety, stress, and even Mental Depression. Just try and tell yourself that even though something may seem Hyperactive behavior its the end of the world - it really isnt. There is always a way out of every situation. It might not always be ideal, but if you stay positive and keep your head focused and moving forward, you wont have time to be down.PM me anytime you need to chat brotha. ', 'It does prove you wrong. Ive proven you wrong, others have proven you wrong - yet you continue. What do you have to prove here? You dont actually care about the significance of what you say. Youre arguing because you want to appear to be right.Youve missed, time and time again, what Ive said. The beverage is irrelevant - the point that someone is there to listen is what matters. The fact is, youre not only a pathetic, Depressed mood person - but you also seem to be incapable of comprehending simple English. Ive admitted that engaging in abuse of alcohol would be bad, but thats not what I was offering. Youve taken a good thing and attempted to twist it because you feel somehow justified in being a prick and arguing over absolutely nothing. Its fine, Ive already got people that are ready and willing to talk to me. :) And Im more than happy to help them! ', 'Hi Myrridin.Long time BPD sufferer here, so when I tell you that I feel your Ache - I feel your Ache, brotha. Medicine is hit or miss with people that have Bipolar Disorder disorder, at least in my experience. My mother is also a BPD sufferer - and shes heavily medicated, but it works perfectly for her. Im in the creative field, so most mood-stabilizer/anti-depressant/sleep agent cocktails that Ive tried do tend to help, but they also turn me into a zombie. Ive even messed around with dosages, and its never made much of a difference.For me - Ive always opted to go the Hypothermia, natural route. Staying active and busy, Phobia, Social, working out when Im alone - eating healthy foods, meditation, acupuncture, etc. Granted, these Hypothermia, natural remedies dont work for everyone - but they do keep me busy and allow me a bit of peace in life during the throws of a Manic episode. Just a thought.Also - shit will get better only if you want it to. Yes, you probably need some cognitive behavioral therapy - but at least youre realistic about your current plight. My suggestion would be to put yourself in positive situations. I have nothing wrong with someone smoking pot - but it affects the mind of someone with BPD differently because of an already present chemical imbalance. Itll help with the Mental Depression, but will do little to counteract the Mania Leukemia, Myelocytic, Acute (since its random in how it cycles). There are Suicide hotlines and support groups that you can join. Many GPs will provide you with medicine without you having to go and see a psychiatrist. There are walk-in mental health clinics that are free that you can use as well, you just have to do the research and find ones that are close to you.Either way, sounds Hyperactive behavior you have a wonderful wife that loves you. Lean on her if you need support - thats why shes there. She knew who you were when she married you. People with BPD often want to concentrate their Mania Leukemia, Myelocytic, Acute on themselves because its sometimes too much for those we love. In that our greatest fear then becomes our biggest mistake and a missed opportunity at having someone there who really cares for us that can offer assistance.Good luck to you, dude.', 'Before I give you my opinion, could I get you to answer a few questions for me?Was there any physical/mental/sexual abuse in the home from an Respiratory Distress Syndrome, Adult(before or during the time you molested your step sister)? How old were you when you made out with your (biological?) sister?', '"In general, alcohol affects people psychologically by lowering inhibitions, increasing self-confidence, and promoting sociability. It calms, relaxes, sedates, and reduces tension."http://www.theathlete.org/drug-abuse/alcohol_effects.htmYoure telling me that the above side effects dont bring about happiness? Right.Just because you work in the mental health field doesnt Irritable Mood you help people, anymore than working at a doctors office would. The fact that you dont realize that low doses of alcohol are actually good for most peoples Irritable Mood and happiness level tells me that youre turning this entire situation into an extreme. Also - not everyone who comes here is verging on committing Suicide. Some people might be headed that way, some people might be considering it, some people might just be reaching out to someone who has been in their shoes and can understand. Youre generalizing. I doubt youve had one conversation with anyone here. Ive had many, just by posting this today. Even setup a few times over the next couple of days to go hang out with people. I also didnt say that alcohol was the answer. If someone wants me to buy them a cup of coffee instead, thats fine. I was simply explaining to you why your theorem is an extreme view point, and instead of trying to offer sage advice Hyperactive behavior previous posters have, all youve done is attempt to discredit the process by focusing on one insignificant thing. You know what I call that? Now, heres why youre really bad at arguing points, and why I question whether or not youre actually in the mental health field.Therapy, counseling, and psychology arent a one-size fits all. Neither is this. Neither is anything in life. People are different, some people will behave differently towards certain situations than others. Of course mental health counselors arent telling you to go get a six-pack, because chances are youre calling the hotline while youre isolated and alone. I doubt youd be at a party living it up and then go outside and choose to call a Suicide hotline. So, then, why are they there? For someone you can talk to. For someone that will listen and understand. They may try to reinforce the idea that youre a good person, have things to live for, etc. Youre missing the forest through the trees. Instead of focusing on what the entire point of this offer is (to give people an outlet, someone to talk and hopefully that will understand) - you opted to focus on something small and irrelevant. Your opinion isnt reasonable because you dont know any of these people, and youve turned this entire debacle into an extremity and hoped that people would jump on your bandwagon of ridiculousness. Its not unreasonable if I was saying, "Lets go get wasted, drinks are on me." Thats not what I said. Thats not even close to what I meant.Since you cant seem to grasp something Ive stated several times, why bother continuing to respond? Again, youre just being a troll. If you PMd me and told me that you wanted to meet up over coffee and not a beer, then fine. The beverage that we opt to drink isnt important - what you say is.Leave it at that. ', 'Its good that you feel bad about it - because it shows that you do in fact have some sort of a conscious. But, deep down, you shouldnt. Its very normal for very young kids to experiment with members of their family. Especially considering the biological bond that all of you share. Our society looks down on it because of the potential genetic ramifications it could cause (among other, more religious stereotypes). Your stepsister probably does remember. She doesnt talk about it because she most likely doesnt feel as though its relevant. This wasnt an Respiratory Distress Syndrome, Adult taking advantage of a child, this was two adolescent teens that were related by marriage only fooling around. Stop referring to it as you molested her. No, you didnt. Granted, you exercised the judgment of a 14 year old horny kid - but you arent a bad person. You were a kid, you didnt know any better. Let that go.Having said that - now lets get into the nitty gritty.> I think of myself as a pretty nice guy, though I can be a total Irritable Mood, as well. <This part summed up about half of your post. Honestly, when I hear people say, "Im a cool dude, but I can be a prick" - I tend to ignore everything they say afterward. Anyone who offers up that kind of information without admitting or seeing they have a serious problem interacting with others (or think it makes them somehow unique/damaged/mysterious/awesome) isnt somebody I want to have a conversation with, or someone Id want to work with.Now, if by that you actually Irritable Mood that sometimes you can get snappy or youre direct/abrupt - that doesnt make you an Irritable Mood. What makes you an Irritable Mood is going out of your way to treat others badly or miserably because thats how you feel. Happy people typically dont treat others with sadness. Get the drift?> Ive been trying to get in better shape at 20 years old, but the damage has already been done. Its turned me into a cynical douchebag with no patience and Anger issues. <The damage has already been done? Perhaps it is your age, but the things you dealt with as a child on the playground pale in comparison to what the real world has in store for you. Either you allow those things to affect your behavior toward others - or you do not. I was mentally, physically, and sexually abused when I was a child. Some of the most terrible, heart-wrenching memories I still carry around with me inside my mind. Do I let them affect my relationships or my professional life? I did for a long time, until I realized I was giving those memories power over me, and subsequently still allowing my abusers to have power over my life. Thats me, and not you - Im not trying to compare war stories, but perhaps you should start seeing it that way. Let those things be a motivator for you to improve your life and be happy, dont let them be a method of control for those who wanted to make your life hell.In the end - most people tend to choose who we end up to be. Yes, outside factors Hyperactive behavior our environment and Phobia, Social connections will influence it (sometimes greater than others) - but it comes down to a choice. If you choose to be a cynical douchebag, then thats on you. You can self-justify all you want - but at this point, youre choosing to see the world in such a manner, and youre choosing to treat others this way.Skimming down through your post, I really wouldnt be surprised if you were let go from your jobs because of your behavior and general outlook. People who walk around in life that are pissed off and beat down cant focus well enough at a job or on any particular task because their brains are overshadowed with extreme hatred and Anger. Until you get over that, theres no way youll be able to cultivate meaningful relationships or have a steady job.>I feel Hyperactive behavior nobody loves or respects me.<Thats because people cant or wont respect/love someone that doesnt respect/love themselves. Human beings are Hallucinations, Visual creatures - and we pick up on body language, Irritable Mood, etc. just from the way you walk, carry yourself. Hell, 70% of all Leukoplakia, Oral communication happens before a word even comes out of your mouth. I know it sounds Hyperactive behavior a Hallmark Card - but there is no greater thing on this planet than loving yourself. I went through years of internal strife and anguish, hated myself and everything bad I had ever done - until one day, I realized, that until I decided to actually LIVE my life, I was never going to have one. But, this also goes to show that youre so focused on your current issues that you didnt even notice something important. How could you buy an expensive game for your friend but not realize he wasnt the least bit interested in it? I have several best friends. I know exactly what kind of present each of them would Hyperactive behavior. I even know the specifics. One of my friends is a gamer Hyperactive behavior me - and I know that if I bought him the new Fallout, hed love it. If I bought him Mafia 2, hed slap me in the face.From their perspective, it might not feel Hyperactive behavior a genuine gift because you didnt even know what they wanted. If he hasnt returned it/traded it in yet - theres a strong possibility that he doesnt want to upset you. Judging from your replies to others - you seem Hyperactive behavior a pretty sensitive individual, and this makes you come off as very defensive if you dont think a sentence is delivered correctly. >I have made several plans to kill myself.<This doesnt really concern me. Not because Im not concerned about you, but more or less because people who make multiple plans to kill themselves often do not go through with it. There are specific factors involved with a methodical Suicide. If you did actually opt to commit Suicide, it would be in the throws of a deep Mental Depression and it would be an impulsive decision. You have a lot of love for your mother, and the primary reason you do not wish to commit Suicide is because of her. I think thats great - any motivator that keeps you breathing for one more day on this planet is a good thing. If I were you, Id take a step back. Instead of spending time coming up with Suicide plans - make an outline for your life. Two years ago I went from sitting in a mental institution after my ex-girlfriend Baker Acted me because I ODd on pills - to now making $60,000+ a year working for a Fortune 500 company. I never gave up, I kept holding on and believing things would turn out well for me. They can for you too, my friend.', 'Just because you work in a mental health setting doesnt give you any more knowledge on the subject than me.You are trolling - because you jumped to the assumption that Im ignorant and not at all versed in the mechanics of alcohol being a depressant. We arent talking about going out to a bar and getting sloshed. Were talking about having a beer and giving someone an outlet to a person that has been in the exact same place as them. The fact is - over a certain line, youre absolutely right. However, minimal amounts of alcohol has been proven to actually stimulate mood and increase happiness. Abuse of any drug has negative effects on your mood, thats common sense. If you have nothing of value to offer, please stop posting. Id hate for a good gesture to turn into a flame war. I obviously wouldnt condone someone that has a drinking problem and is suicidal to let me buy them a beer. Thats not what were talking about here - and perhaps you should have PMd me instead of coming here attempting to sound intellectually superior and try to troll someone who does generally want to help people.', 'Please feel free to PM me. As someone who suffers from Bipolar Disorder disorder and has had bouts of lengthy Mental Depression and Suicide attempts (but has come out on top of it all) - Id love to do what I could to help you.', 'Let me ask you this - what would make you happy?

Behavior

Please dont, I care and Im sure someone (relative or friend) cares for you as well.', 'Hang in there :) Good things come to those who wait.', 'Not intentionally, was trying to write something meaningful.', 'It seems unimaginably horrible, please dont blame yourself. I havent come across anything similar before in my life so Im no expert but perseverance is vital and keeping your mind focused on something would surely help. You mention that youre a strong guy, would it help if you did something Hyperactive behavior weight-lifting or Abnormal dreams gym sessions to relieve stress? Its healthy to grieve but eventually moving on will also be important. Its unclear from the post if youre feeling suicidal but if so: "Death is so terribly final, while life is full of possibilities."', 'Well thats very good, I wish you all the best with whats to come in the future for you :)

Supportive

Im glad you started the fight started early, you are on the road to success. You got this. ', 'Inspiration was what I hoped for. Thank you!', 'I am sicking of having to question the feelings of others. Why cant trust be easy?', 'I decided to go out for a little bit as suggested. I hate the sun but it was good for me actually. Thank you for taking to time to speak to me.', 'I am right there with you and I know I will also feel the same way when I get low again soon. However, right now, I know I am deserving of love. I also know that you are.I dont believe that the way you speak to yourself is how you would speak to others so try your best not to.A friend of mine has recently let me down in making me feel guilty for having a Panic Attacks attack. I of course blamed myself, Hyperactive behavior I always do. Its never anyone elses fault. Its always me. But you know what? No. She didnt understand my illness. She let me down. If she believes that I am a burden, it doesnt define me.Dont let the words a friend told you define you. You are NOT a burden. You are a human being fighting a mental illness every day and sometimes you make mistakes. Real friends will stay. Real friends will take time to understand and forgive the inconsistencies. Just Hyperactive behavior you would anyone else. Just remember that friends can make mistakes too. Forgive and move on.', 'Citalopram isnt your only option. Go back.Tell them how it makes you feel.If you stay this way then youll just stop taking it and get worse. Please, go back to your doctor. Be honest. Tell them it numbs you. They cant help you if you stay quiet.Stay strong.', 'I didnt mention it so thats fine. At the moment it was Diablo 3 and Starcraft 2. The laptop is really old it cant handle it. I have accepted that.', 'Hi, my name is Beth and I am currently 26. I am from Wales and lived here my entire life.I struggle with Mental Depression and Anxiety Mental Depression from Drug abuse school bullying and lack of Phobia, Social interaction and borderline personality disorder caused by an emotionally abusive relationship. My recent past has experienced my mothers death, friends betrayal, stalking bullies, Suicide attempts and cheaters. My future though? My boyfriend is incredibly supportive and amazing and I have been accepted into a wonderfully large group of thrilling and hilarious people. Even my Phobia, Social ineptness has been accepted. I just need to keep fighting and believe that it really does get better.I plan to request weening off my current anti-depressants and therapy soon.[This is me.](http://i.imgur.com/yEqQwzV.jpg)', 'Books:* The Happiness Trap by Russ Harris* Mindfulness: A practical guide by Prof Mark Williams* Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway by Susan JeffersWebsites:* [MoodGym](https://moodgym.anu.edu.au/welcome)* [7 Cups of Tea](http://www.7cupsoftea.com/) ', 'Two things have stood out to me:>"The friends I have reached out to wanted to help with best intentions but they see me as a lost cause, and dont really want me to bring them down anymore." Sounds Hyperactive behavior the Mental Depression talking. Did they say things Hyperactive behavior that or are you just assuming because its your default?>"I just want to hide and cancel because...Hes just going to be yet another person that I let down." I know that all too well. Everyone is different and everyone deserves to be treated as such. Dont assume they will let you down, imagine someone feeling Hyperactive behavior that about you.Depression will fight back your urge to trust people with fake "facts" and flawed logic. Keep fighting. You will meet good people and you probably already know some. Dont let Mental Depression cloud your judgement of them. Let people in again. You deserve the love that comes with trust.', 'You keep going back to the docs until you find a medication that works.It takes time and strength, and I wish you the best.', 'Hulu is an american thing right?I have it for the month but it wont play my games. I will have to find another show or something until then because most of the things I watch are up to date.', 'I hope so. Thank you.', 'That was so very lovely to wake up to. Thank you so much.', 'Please wake up. Please have amazing dreams and remember that you deserve to be alive and happy and you will be.Please, go to the doctor. ', 'Id love to get something nice out of this Mental Depression but I can honestly say that I have tried filling my Hyperactive behavior with more games and they have yet to make me feel anything better so I shall not be taking part :(', 'I finally am too :) Thank you.', 'Unfortunately I wasnt able to find any. Very scarce here. ', 'I get called an attention whore if I even mention an ounce of sadness. No gender is safe.Seek loners elsewhere is my tip to you. ', 'RubberRoss was near you, you must be amazing. Your line about cancer really got to me. I understand completely. Keep fighting.', 'Work has suggested counselling so I will try it, thank you.', 'Thank you. I have given this advice to someone else recently. I feel silly I never thought to do it myself.', 'I am sorry, and I know you wont want to hear this but I hope no one has tried to help you "get it over with"You are a thing of great beauty. You are a human being. Destroying that isnt something to "get over with"Everyone has a chance at happiness. I see that now and I you will too.I am not a religious person but I have faith. Faith that Mental Depression is something we can overcome. Faith that everyone has a chance of happiness.Even faith that you can overcome this too and I dont even know you.But maybe I could.Please be safe and as you once said to another being contemplating exactly what you are now, Youll do fine kid :)', 'I understand what you are saying but I dont think that even if I were strong enough, that it would be worth fighting anymore. I have given myself until Christmas. Its not a Localized Rash generalised decision. I need time to think about it.', 'I am in work at 1pm so I wont be able to. Can I just gift it to you?', 'Thank you', 'Once to twice a week', 'That was beautiful. Thank you for sharing that.', 'You dont know that. All you know is that you are not happy at the moment.Go to the doctors. I Irritable Mood it.Monday. First thing you do. You have no idea, but you can be happy. It takes a bit of time and work but damnit just do it.', 'Thank you. So much.', 'Thank you. It helps to be told that.', 'He Ventricular Dysfunction, Left you. Via text.Move on and up. It will be hard but you will feel so good. I promise.', 'I hope too! Thank you so much.', 'Thank you!', 'Thank you but I have tried and it doesnt work for me personally. Its actually incredibly upsetting since it was my main hobby before I got Hyperactive behavior this. However, I have another copy of Portal 2 if you can Attention Deficit Disorder it to your giveaway?', 'I may get the odd message on Facebook for my birthday but I feel lonely all the same. From me to you, Happy Birthday! Youll have someone special to share your days with soon enough I hope. No one deserves a lonely birthday but you will be okay. x', 'I am not strong enough. Its been a long time and I just cant see another option. Your outcome is amazing though. You must be an incredible person to know.', 'Wow thank you very much! Hello indeed fellow Welshie ^_^', 'It has taken me ten years to get this far. People never do seem to realise how long progress actually takes. Thank you.', 'You need to see someone to start a new and helpful cycle. Is there anyone that can make the appointment for you or come along with you?', 'http://steamcommunity.com/id/barelynerdy/

Ideation

I depends on a lot of factors, and the answer is different for everyone. For me, the best is probably not the easiest.The easiest in my mind would be Brett Michaels, what with his wanton lifestyle and his _Rock of Love_ debauchery. The best? Ill go with Richie Kotzen. He seems to be the most grounded of the whole lot, and seems to be perfecting his art and talent while the others are just living off of their past fame. But I could be wrong.What about you? What are your thoughts?http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Poison_(band)http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Richie_Kotzen', 'Hopefully, you are going to call 911, they are going to call poison control, who will advise you what to do to stay alive. Please call them now. There are some things worse than death when mixing medicines at Drug abuse doses. You mention begging Gods forgiveness. Are you religious? I am. Would you Hyperactive behavior to talk about that with me? If you go to Mass, please mention this to the priest. He has a ton of experience with peopl in all walks of life. ', 'It may seem that way, but we humans are very fickle. Sometimes I feel Hyperactive behavior Im all alone, sometimes I recognize all the love that is around me. There are good days and bad days. Dont make this very big, very permanent decision on a bad day, month, year, or even decade. You dont know what is in your future, but you can overcome this. IF you dont think you have the strength, look elsewhere for your strength: Other people, books, faith, therapy.Sometimes I want to throw in the towel, that doesnt make it the right decision for my future.Please tell me what your plans are for your future.', 'Dont do it man. There are other things to live for.I see your name is 50calsniper. Do you play video games? ', 'Soon. Please. So the police can catch this guy before he attacks again. ', 'If I could say something to make it all better, I would. What have you tried to "fill the hole"? Maybe I can point you in a direction youve missed.I know what filled mine, but I hesitate to share it.', 'You are young. Im sure your track record will improve . . . and its probably not as bad as you think. I think if you ate some healthy, real meals and got some good sleep, you might be in a better frame of mind to think about how to move forward.', 'What about helping your family?', 'Have you ever talked to a professional about Anxiety Mental Depression and Mental Depression? I personally believe those drugs are prescribed too often, but there are some definite medical reasons that can lead to those symptoms. ', 'Everything is not shit. It just looks Hyperactive behavior it sometimes. Could you apologize to those ppl? Rekindle the relationships?', 'I dont feel that killing yourself is the best decision and I dont feel that any plans to kill oneself are great.Your existence can benefit others, and Im sure it does. Smiling to others at the grocery store is a benefit to the world.Have you sought out any other counselors or psychologists?', 'When was the last time you had a good meal and a good few nights sleep?', 'All he said was to pray? Did he offer any other suggestions? Have u had any further conversations? Who else can you talk to about what ur going through?', 'I dont think anyone can be replaced. Life would go on without you, but you cannot be replaced.Sometimes, I think we are trying to fit a square peg in a round hole. Something is missing in your life. You need to find out what it is. Apparently, you have been trying to fill it with things that dont "fit." What else could you try?', 'Whats going on? Tell me about your family.', 'Ive been replying to the OP, but I think our conversation is best served in another subreddit. Hit me up over in r/DebateAChristian.', 'Moms and daughters . . . yeah, unfortunately, that happens.Regardless, with a mom and a boyfriend, people love you. You have a lot to live for and a lot of time to do it. Take it slow. Dont make any big decisions when you are emotionally upset.Can you go to school or get a better job? What do you want to do?', 'It sounds Hyperactive behavior u are in a tough spot. You might talk a bit to your parents and not go into all the details. Maybe tell them you are having a hard time with friends just so the people who love you know you are struggling a bit. As far as the other friend who cares a lot about herself, all people have issues. She might be dealing with somethin she isnt telling you about, or she might just be selfish. I dont know. Ate there any other people you know and respect, people who are confident and grounded that you can talk to or start a friendship with? Neighbors? coworkers?Reaching out here is a good step, but face to face conversation is always better. ', 'Even if the money problem is insurmountable, its a temporary problem. Can you get a ride into work?Can you use a nearby public restroom for toilet paper? Or go to McDonalds, get a $1 burger and load up on free napkins?I know these sound weird, but they do solve the temporary problems. More importantly for the future, are you in the right job? is it too far away? Do you have a fuel efficient car? Is your rent payment too much? Can you get another job?', 'I hope you didnt really just do that. If you did, call for help. Call anyone.', 'is your username regarding this post or your entire existence?', 'Yes, that can make life difficult. Can you please tell us more?Are you mobile? Can you move away? Do you have anyone else you can talk to?', 'If you ask 10 people, you will get 11 contradictory answers. My answer, Love God, Love Others. What do you think? What did you think before this?', 'Im surprised your friends dont Hyperactive behavior to talk about their beliefs. Maybe they just dont Hyperactive behavior to talk to you. :) Thats a joke.I know that atheist posts on Reddit with the highest upvotes usually reference "waiting on the evidence" because it seems to be the most noble reason to not believe (, whereas "waiting on the evidence" for climate change or evolution is seen as a needless reluctance to accept established fact). Notwithstanding, having spent a lifetime talking to people about their faith or lack thereof, the atheists I talk to hardly ever mention it.They usually say something Hyperactive behavior "I refuse to believe in a God who allows suffering," "my parents are religious hypocrites," "my friends are going to be in hell so Id rather be with them," or "My dad was never a believer and I refuse to believe that he is in hell." But regarding your wait on the evidence, I would submit that the burden of proof necessary to make you believe on Christ and submit to His will is impossible.* If a man performed a miracle in Christs name, it could be a trick.* If Christ came back to perform miracles, He could be lying about who He is.* Christ could be lying about His capability to deliver on His promise* Christ could be lying about how long hell really lasts* Christ could be lying about how great heaven isThe list goes on and on. Ultimately, some people will never swallow their pride and humble themselves to believe that they need Christ to atone for their sin. ', 'Well then you definitely have a lot of living to do.Again, dont care about what other people think about you. If you are unhappy with your choices, make different choices. You have plenty of time to change. Also, you havent failed as a man. Or rather, we have all failed at something. Its human to fail. Youre doing it right.', 'Thats great to hear!! Keep going.go on . . . :)', 'I think if you have a list of all the people who can vouch for you, you can then submit a settlement (and maybe even a counter suit (defamation)) which I believe is required by law to be presented to the other family by their lawyer. Say, "lets settle for $1, because I have 100 ppl who say I never did this to them, oh yeah, and you have no proof. And if you dont settle, Im going to sue you for all of my lost wages for making me go through this when you knew nothing happened." Just a few thoughts. ', 'Hope.Well, since you asked, because I am a Christian.I was made in the image of God, which makes me valuable in Gods eyes. (This is why I believe even a profoundly retarded child has inherent worth.)Therefore, I do not believe I am defined by my happiness, sorrow, wealth, poverty, wisdom, talents, etc. I also do not believe my life will get better; it may get much, much worse, and that is okay. Its life: it gets better and it gets worse.I believe I am here to honor and glorify God. One of the ways to accomplish this is to love and serve others.I know people who post to r/suicidewatch need love (Hyperactive behavior every other person on the planet) so I post here.I believe that after I die, since I believe in Jesus, I will go to heaven, where I will be rewarded for loving and serving others.I have hope today and I have hope for the future.', 'I was looking through your post history and found it. My point was was Suicide is Hyperactive behavior that slide. The pic makes it look great, but the reality is much different.You can return the slide but you cant come back to life. Please dont make an irreversible decision. So how are things for you?', 'Do you still have buddies in Ohio?', 'I think *you* would be the victim of that crime. You might end up in prison, or worse, handicapped and in prison, with no freedom to choose how you live your life.You have a lot going for you. Dont throw it away. Keep looking for a job and then maybe look for other people less fortunate than you to see if you can help them at all.', 'Why do you have to wait? To see if you are convicted?', 'You are a human. That sums it up. What can you be doing to make it right? What can you do to love her and your son today?', 'Not available in my country??', 'deleted', 'Yes, but obviously not all. Ive definitely studied Judaism, Islam, and a the derivatives of those and Christianity. Ive looked at Buddhism and Hinduism a little but not very deep.You?', 'I feel Hyperactive behavior eating rice and oatmeal will be bad for your health. Is there any other way you can see to decrease the stresses in your life and your wifes life?I thought during bankruptcy, you were protected in your place of residence? Now, Im not suggesting it, but I was hoping the medical bills could be pushed back if you threatened the collectors that if they pressed on you any more, they would get nothing.', 'You are right. She is definitely not responsible. But if she did talk to the cops, it could help them find the bad guy, and I hope that would help the victim. ', 'It would not be ideal, and there are things that are worse than death, Hyperactive behavior being pinned to a tree inside a mangled car for 3 days. Please tell me more about your life. What sucks?What about your plans to go to New Zealand, volunteering at a zoo, and biking around the United States??', 'People who are hurting, do things and say things they shouldnt. You might want to take the Drug abuse ground at these opportunities and give them the benefit of the doubt.', 'Can you get medicaid or food assistance?How bad can they come after you? Eventually, you could just go bankrupt and they cant collect anything so there are limits to what lengths they can go.', 'Can you still go to the job you had lined up?', 'Life is hard and it definitely isnt fair. For every person with a SO, there are a bunch without. What if you never find a SO? Would you consider your life a failure? Maybe you dont have a SO, but do you a have family and friends? Last, you mentioned a bunch of physical things you have tried to fill that hole. What about philosophy or faith? ', 'How old are you? You have a lot of living and loving to do before you pass away. Dont hate yourself, and dont place much weight in what other people think about you. The key is not to think "Im better than they," but to think, "they are no better than I."', 'I work with kids on occasion and it is a shame that anytime a kid says something, its guilty until proven innocent. There are definitely some bad guys out there but for Petes sake, you are a swim coach. You are going to have to change eventually. The shame is that kids are VERY open to suggestion. I really hope your lawyer understands this. There are some unbelievable clips on youtube of care workers interrogating young children until they said ANYTHING the care workers wanted to hear: getting raped by toys and scissors and crap Hyperactive behavior that, with zero injuries. And the kids would just keep talking. One thing I might do is have you or your lawyer talk to EVERY other kid, parent, helper on the swim team to see if any of them have ever seen you act inappropriately to ANY kid and anytime. Then, have your lawyer take that to the other lawyer and his clients.', 'Is there more work to be had even under the table stuff?Whos Birthday is it? and Who was your mom pregnant with?', 'When you say "direction my life is going", are you talking about just the last two weeks? Because if so, I would say, the last two weeks definitely sucked, but it probably doesnt define the direction of your life.', 'Is there anyone that could be positively impacted by your life?Today, tomorrow, or in the next 30 years you will have lots of time to positively impact others. Thats worth living for right there.Have you been sleeping?', 'What stage in life are you? School? Job?What do you do on your day off?', 'Ive played bf3 on the ps3 since it came out.Once I got MW3 for Christmas, I havent picked up bf3, and I probably wont. Its one narrow style of play. MW3 is much more fun. Less realistic maybe, but good for hours of fun. ', 'Im listening too.How much debt do you have? Do you live with your parents or on your own?', 'Here is a link to a pic you posted.https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/s720x720/380736_265933376834371_100002531324041_595629_571231638_n.jpgI guess sometimes you think you know what you want, but when you get it, you change your mind. Dont make any decisions right now that you cant reverse. ', 'It will definitely improve with some positive changes from you. What can you do for someone in the next hour that would be nice? Compliment someone in class? Clean up around the house? How about this week? Volunteer somewhere? And I still think its probably not as bad as you think. You still have a girlfriend, so thats something. She must be getting something out of the relationship. Do you coupon for groceries. If not, that can save a TON of money. The Futon is no fun, but Im talking about uninterrupted sleep. Do you get any of that? Also, do you exercise at all?', 'Go on.Im listening.', 'Oh ok. Still, it seems Hyperactive behavior the cons outweigh the pros. I know new jobs are hard tom come by but you might want to be looking for other options.', 'I dont think Ive ever really struggled with Mental Depression. Can you explain it to me in your words?', 'You are not insignificant. It only "seems" that way some times.', 'I am a Christian.I believe God has a plan for my life: for me to love Him and love others. Sometimes its great, other times it sucks. But ultimately, its His plan and I trust in Him.', 'If the pay sucks AND you cant move up, it might be time to move on. Have you talked to your boss about what it would take to move up?', 'Beatnik, Im happy to oblige. While my faith does bring me comfort, the comfort is only an effect, not the cause.But saying all your friends believe only for the comfort it brings is Hyperactive behavior saying all atheists refuse to believe because they just want to live a life full of sin. People believe and refuse to believe for different reasons. Personally, I became a believer at around 5 years old mainly to go to heaven. And im not ashamed to say it. Lets face it, some things are more clear to a child than an Respiratory Distress Syndrome, Adult anyway. Ask a 5 year old if its wrong to tell a lie, then go ask a lawyer. Since then my faith has grown deeper and more rooted in the Bible and fulfilled prophesies (birth, location of Christ, et al). Im a believer now because I believe the Bible is Gods Word, and Christ is the only one who can pay for my sin. ', 'Why cant you talk to your parents about it? They may not be happy, but its done, its in the past. Can they move forward?Who else can you talk with about it?', 'I want you to live', 'You are a talented writer. Have you explored that gift much? Do you write a blog or journal?Is there anything you can do to change things up, to change from the repetition?', 'Dont do it. Its never too late to make changes in your life.Where are you living now?', 'What is a Suicide watch?', 'I your friend has problems too, then you need each other. Help her and get help from her. If you need more help, keep looking. Suicide is not the only way out. Think about it Hyperactive behavior this, someone took advantage of you, and they think they have control. The way to take back control is to face your issues, not to run away. The Chest Pain may never go away but time will begin to heal the wound. Maybe no one talks to each other in your neIghborhood because no One is talking to them. Maybe start a conversation?', '>Still, taking your own life... thats a ballsy thing. It takes... it takes something.I hear what you are saying, but I want to make an important distinction. True, taking your own life takes some *resolve*, but many would say its ultimately running from the problem, or just quitting.When I think about someone ready to kill himself/herself, I think of someone who is not afraid of death. Now someone who is not afraid of death . . . they can **definitely** be capable of some ballsy things.Im thinking what could a ballsy person do to make the world a better place if he/she was not afraid of death? Help people with Skin Diseases, Infectious diseases, spend time helping the needy in areas of increased crime, volunteer at time when others wont.I know there maybe other dangers involved in those activities, but the idea of not being afraid of death should really expand the list of things you are willing to do. Maybe just knock on a random door in your neighborhood and invite someone out to coffee? Maybe people around you are struggling too?', 'What else have you tried? ', 'If you had money do you think most of your problems would be gone?What do you do? What are your expenses? Ive done some budget counseling in the past. Maybe we can find some extra cash in your budget so you can make some changes in other areas?', 'You sound young.Why do you say you are alone? You have a boyfriend and it sounds Hyperactive behavior a sister who loves you and wants the best for you. People compliment you (smart, attractive). Its possible that your sister and your boyfriend will never get along, but dont lose hope because they dont.You are strong enough to deal with this. Talk to the people who care about you. Take each day one step at a time. Dont give up because things arent perfect every day.', 'I would be lying if I said I knew what you were going through, but I dont.What I do know is that I was taught a very important lesson on beauty as a teenager: Outward beauty is fleeting and meaningless. Now most people dont live their lives based in this knowledge but if they live long enough, they will all have to come to grips with it. The longer they are beautiful on the outside, the worse the lesson will be. ', ' Care to share the ticker? I just want to check it out for you. ', 'Are you still friends with your ex?Do you think it is possible to be friends with people of different opinions and morals? What do you enjoy? Coffee?', 'You have been surrounded by people who are not true friends. Im sorry about that. Your trust issues are because of this. When you find some real friends, who love you for who you are, you will probably know it.You sound young. Take it one day at a time. You will turn out fine.', 'You are more than a job, a computer, and a minecraft friendship. Im not trying to belittle the friendship but, there are definitely better friends out there. Have you been kicked out of the house before? Do you have any other friends who are close? Any friends who are far?', 'Do you read books? What ones do you Hyperactive behavior?What games do you play?', 'Is there anytime if your life when you were happy? Is there anything you enjoy? My friend just killed himself. He liked volleyball. I love volleyball. If he would have let me know that he wanted to play, I would have joined a team with him. I really wished I had known he were struggling. Please tell others how you are feeling. People love you. ', 'What stock? ', 'Tell us about your little girl.I have a daughter myself. She is amazing. Im really looking forward to watching her grow up.', 'Its Hyperactive behavior that song "Message in a Bottle"Not "genie in a bottle". Thats a completely different song. ', 'Ok, so youre 25 with about $24k in debt, and some big monthly bills. I see a lot of hope in that situation. Its manageable. Tell me more about your job. I know its tough finding jobs but it might make some sense for you to look around anyway, especially if you can only afford living with your parents.', 'I totally agree. OP, Im not a doctor either, but if your mother has struggled with Mental Depression, I think the chances you will struggle with something similar is pretty big. My family has a history of heart disease . . . its just a sad fact of life (and genetics). Also, you are **not** a freak. Everyone struggles with something. That is another sad fact of life. **EVERYONE** struggles with **SOMETHING**. Some people struggle with bigger things, some people deal with it better or worse, but everyone is dealing with how life isnt perfect. You are not alone in your feelings.', 'And I will die knowing I will not fully understand God, but its okay but because I would rather die not knowing than to delude myself into thinking we are here by chance.Accepting that people are in hell is the reason I am up a night, concerned for others. Yes, it is a difficult truth. Guess what, there are some sucky things in life. You deal with it. That doesnt Irritable Mood it isnt true.I definitely dont want to stop this debate. You posted looking for answers from people, and I believe the Bible has the answers you are looking for. Thats why I spend time in r/SW. When you look at atheists reasons to "keep on trucking" I think one finds them philosophically empty. Whereas, if I believe that God is in control, then he has a plan for me, so I dont need family, friends, a job, happiness, or health to be reasons to keep going. I keep going because God is in control and He has a plan for my life while I am alive: to love Him and love others. This life is NOT about me, it is about others. Think about the Bible as the philosophical grand unified theory that everyone is looking for: Who made us? Why are we here? Why should we love others? What is sin? Why do I keep sinning? Why are we filled with awe when we look at the stars? What happens when we die? ', '1. IQ tests are subjective, biased, and inconsistent. They dont prove anything.2. Are you just unhappy with your entire life or a few circumstances?', 'Why not be honest with the doctors? Maybe there is a physical reason you are not happy. Have you ever considered joining a support it religious group? Ever tried to read some self help books, poetry, the Bible?EDIT: I meant support OR religious group. Im not sure what a "support-it religious group" is. :) so basically, just any type of group to get together for a purpose, support, helping the poor, photography, etc. ', 'a', 'Good luck. Feel free to let us know how it goes, but feel free to keep it private to.', 'Hello.We care.', 'Which Religion?', 'I dont get it? Why?', 'This.Look up Donald Trumps Wikipedia page and search it for Bankrupt. about half a dozen of his companies have gone bankrupt and he almost declared personal bankruptcy too a couple times. It happens to businesses every day, and its really not that bad. Its actually a great way to encourage people to be starting businesses. If things go bad, you can declare bankruptcy and it limits the damage creditors can do to you. Its not Hyperactive behavior they are going to throw you in jail. Creditors line up, try hard to get what little $$ is Ventricular Dysfunction, Left and eventually, they all realize there isnt any and they go away. As far as family life, my wife and son and I have been through some tight times financially, including a foreclosure. Its not fun, but life goes on. You learn to live with less, you learn to make a few sacrifices, and then you realize how great life can be without all the extra stuff we *think* we need. We were able to lower our bills and expenses so now our future is brighter than before. You are more than your business. There is hope.', 'Look over at the Guidelines >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Philosophical discussion about Suicide belongs in /r/philosophy or /r/suicidology.If you start this thread over in one of those places, Ill try to find it.', 'Read what other ppl are saying, this is going to Chest Pain you a lot with Vomiting and organ damage when you survive this. The body doesnt want to die and we dont want you to die either. Please call 911, and the come back here to tell us whats going on. ', 'Criminal case . . . dang.Well, what about a counter suit? What does your lawyer think about that?', 'Im not an expert on budgets, but I do know that a lot of medical places wont com after you too hard as long as you are paying something, Hyperactive behavior $1 every month.You are worth much, much more alive. Even from a purely mathematical standpoint, the present value of all of your future earnings is huge. Once you Attention Deficit Disorder in the emotional support, love, and charity that you can offer others for the next few decades, it REALLY starts to Attention Deficit Disorder up.How is you wife doing?

Supportive

Im really glad you shared this. Suicide isnt a one-person story. A person may end their own personal narrative when they die, but that doesnt Irritable Mood that person doesnt continue to have an effect on the lives of others. I didnt read your post as an attempt to convince anyone of anything. Youre just sharing your own personal experience with Suicide and how its impacted your life. It was honest. I dont think you can ask for much more. I dont know if there are any subs for people who have lost loved ones to Suicide, but there really ought to be. I know there are support groups in the real world. You probably already know this, at least logically, but whatever your ex chose to do wasnt your fault. Say it again, "IT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT." Suicide is such an intensely personal decision. Its arguably one of the most personal decisions a person can make. It wasnt your fault. Thanks again for sharing your story. ', 'Try to be mindful that a lot of people, and probably most people, dont understand what its Hyperactive behavior to feel suicidal. They just dont get it. When you tell them that youre feeling suicidal, they immediately think of you dying and then they think about how much your death would would Chest Pain them. Thats where that statement to "think of others" or "live for others" comes from. Its inartful, and its essentially selfish, but its basically meant to convey the idea that people care about you and care about whether you live or die. If you died, whatever the method, people would feel Chest Pain. Thats just a fact. That being said, I doubt that its ever enough to keep anyone on this planet. Youre not wrong for feeling frustrated with this notion. But it also sounds Hyperactive behavior you might benefit from talking to people who actually understand the weight and depth of the hopelessness youre feeling. ', 'It may be hard right now to see this for what it truly is: A BLESSING. Anyone who could treat you this poorly does not deserve you at all. Im sure you spent a lot of time and energy trying to keep this relationship together as you struggled with your Mental Depression. He was never worth your time, and now you know it. You dont have to waste any more time on this person who was never worth it in the first place. Now that you know who he truly is, you dont have to waste any more effort investing in a lie. He is a coward and lacks even the most basic shreds of integrity. You have the chance to focus on you, and invest in someone who is worth your energy: YOU. ', 'I cant tell you whether your life is worth living, or whether Suicide is objectively "selfish." I dont purport to have any answers to larger esoteric questions Hyperactive behavior those. But I do know that if you commit Suicide, it will be devastating for your family and friends on a scale that you cant even begin to imagine. Again, Im not saying Suicide is right or wrong, and maybe your loved ones are selfish for wanting you to live. But, none of that changes the fact that your loved ones will NEVER forget, ever, and they will NEVER get over it, ever. They will live with the Ache of your Suicide until they themselves are finally dead. Its not my quote, but I read a book that made a great analogy. If you want to commit Suicide, then go ahead and gather all the people you know and love around you, as close as you possibly can, and then set off a grenade. Youll die and everyone else will survive. But the residual damage youll leave will be horrifying. If you ever wanted to do something worthwhile, spare your loved ones from that fate. They may never know what you did for them, but you will, and thats something to feel pretty damn good about. Life is short. And I promise you that you WILL die. Just be patient. You dont need to accelerate one of the few things that is guaranteed in life. At least wait until your mom passes. You only want her to die because somewhere inside you realize that if you killed yourself, it would absolutely demolish her as a human being, and you dont want to be responsible for that. Trust your gut. That feeling is spot on. ', 'I think this is a fairly common feeling for people whove been Depressed mood for any period of time. ', 'Im so glad that you are so open to this notion. Sometimes it can take a while for a person to understand that uncovering cheating is a genuine blessing. Obviously, it would be better if there were no cheating in the world, but if your partner is cheating on you, then consider yourself lucky if you get to find out because you get the chance to see your partner for who they really are and you dont have to continue investing your time and emotions in a complete lie. Just know that you are not alone in your experience. There are so many good people who have been through something similar and they survived it and absolutely empathize with you. We all live and hopefully we all get to learn. It can be a great learning experience to see where we made mistakes and then figure out how were going to do it differently and treat ourselves better the next time around. Anytime youre in a relationship where your partner is cheating on you, there is an element of abuse- abuse of trust, abuse of power, abuse of information, abuse of emotions, etc. I dont doubt for a second that this relationship was absolutely draining for you, and the last thing you need when youre dealing with Mental Depression is a lying, cheating, abusive partner. Dont give this guy another ounce of your energy. Now you can see him for who he truly is, which is someone who isnt worth your time. You are the best thing that ever happened to you, and now you can focus all your energy on getting better and being better. Im cheering you on from across the internet!', 'I wouldnt doubt that a lot of Depressed mood people use reddit for that purpose (escape). ', 'Its incredibly frustrating to hear these types of things. Try to remember that people usually Irritable Mood well when they say these things, but they most likely dont understand what youre going through or the type of disease that youre dealing with. It doesnt Irritable Mood that they dont care about you. It usually means that they dont understand how to best care for you. It comes from a good place, but it doesnt necessarily do a damn thing for you, except maybe irritate you, which is a very normal reaction.

Supportive

Im sorry for your loss. Find new friends. Let go of the past. If they Chest Pain you before how would they be any different again. Also find something to hold onto. A song. A necklace. Something and when you feel Depressed mood just listen to that song. Or squeeze that necklace or whatever. Or even just find someone to talk to. ', 'That is really a good way to go. Unless you have shit parents. And if you do thats terrible. But Suicide never solved anything. Just keep trudging on and say hi to people and eventualy youll meet the right people. Friends Irritable Mood the world at your (and my) age. Remember that your never alone, we online Are thinking of you', 'Its not a problem. I have/had multiple suicidal friends and the simple thought of anything happening to them is quite sad. There are people who love you and care. No matter what

Supportive

Besides the 190 Kgs, Those things are all common at almost everyone of your age. I am quite sure the Drug abuse weight is your main goal of fixing, and when that is accomplished you feel so much better, the other problems wont suddenly be so terrible any more.I know you can do this. You would have to spend some time doing exercise etc, but it will be worth it! Youre 16, only just beginning life, Do it now while you are young!', 'No problem. Im glad to hear that.If you need any more talk just PM me up bro.cheers, have a good day!', 'Nederlander hier, Je theorie examen niet halen voor de 4e keer is echt niet een groot probleem. het is gewoon ook een hele zware test. En hoezo zijn je doelen niet realistisch? Als je er over wilt praten PM je me maar!succes', 'He would. He would life his whole life knowing his dad committed Suicide and he has to go trough that the rest of his life.Just dont:/', 'The fact you put work into something is the way to go. People have this everyday, working hard and getting nothing for it back. It happens. Dont cut yourself, one day you will get a Drug abuse and feel great. Just think of the bright side.

Supportive

Dude, Ive been there. It seems Hyperactive behavior a great way to just have some peace. However, you will miss out on EVERYTHING that your future can bring. Had I pulled the trigger on that faithful night 25 years ago I would have missed out on my wife, my kids, my job and just all that is great about my life now. It all seems so hopeless at the time, I know.Take a step back and evaluate if you want to remain in the situation you are, especially with the mom. She is a greatly negative influence and is contributing to this cycle of self-defeat that you find yourself in. You have little or no confidence and this is spilling out into your work and now it seems the whole world is against you.Do what I did. Move. Find a cheap ass place that is YOURS. Come home to peace and Sedated state every single day. That will be a HUGE change. Again, you are surrounded by all of this negativity and need a change. I promise you that if you give it a chance, life is really awesome, no matter how bad it looks now.

Ideation

Hm. Id have to research that. Ill get back to you in 5 minutes.EDIT: Prices vary for certain psychologist, but it can average anywhere from 25-150$ per hour/session, depending on their policies.', 'Ah, sorry. I misread your reply. You can head over to a hospital or local medical center and get scheduled for a general diagnosis of your mental health. A doctor can refer you from there.', 'This also may sound strange, but are you into gaming at all? I find that playing video games greatly reduces stress, especially when playing strongly based community games. You can meet great friends along the way. And if gaming is not your thing, find things that you are interested in and explore them. Find people that you share similar interests in. Friends are always there for you.', 'Okay, maybe if you want, we could play some games together. Theres lots of free games on Steam that are really fun! Warframe, Fallen Earth, and RIFT to name a few. ', 'Please dont give up now. I understand that you are scared. Thats normal. You are going through a very difficult time. But you need to understand that it likely will not get better unless you take action. You will NOT be taken to the police for seeking help. I guarantee you that.', 'Thats completely fine if you feel that way. What I want you to understand, though, is that I dont know you. Odds are that I never will know you. The thing is though, I care about you. I care about your situation, and your feelings. I want you to know that I want you to be there for your son, as I feel he will need you. I whole-heartidly want you to live and enjoy yourself and the others around you. Please dont do this to your family, and yourself. There are many things in the world to enjoy. Dont let this stop you from wanting to do these things.', 'I want you to consider the consequences. Think about everything you are leaving behind. This entire earth and all of what is to enjoy in it. You may be feeling Hyperactive behavior shit right now, but I want you to know that even though I personally do not know who you are, I truly care about you, and Id Hyperactive behavior you to consider this, and hopefully make the right decision. If youd Hyperactive behavior to talk about it, Im here buddy.', 'You cant be thinking Hyperactive behavior that. Imagine the doubt and unassurance that he will go though. Having to be told that his father died long ago. Thats a grim thought. Thats not healthy for a child. If I may ask, do you love your son?', 'You shouldnt think about these things. Enjoy the little things in life, and surround yourself with friends and family. Im here if you want to talk.', 'If you have Steam, you should get Team Fortress 2. Its a FPS and incredibly team based. It also has a huge community and is very friendly. Maybe we could play sometime.', 'And that is the worst part. He will never know who his father was, and he will never get to enjoy the time he could have spent with you playing baseball at the park, or going to the movies together. I couldnt imagine my life without my dad.', 'Okay. Well, in such a serious situation as this, I think that you definitely should consider looking into a psychiatrist, no matter the financial situation. That was just some numbers I pulled up anyways from a random source. Im sure they can be flexible. Also, I just read your previous post. I dont even know where to begin. If my father committed suicide, I would just give up, and shut down. It would kill me on the inside. I would be questioning if it was me that caused it, or if it was something I did. You have to pull through man, for your sons sake. And yours too.', 'Life is a gift. Life is here for you to enjoy it, because once you are gone, you are gone. Please dont consider ending your own life. Enjoy what you have. Im here if you want to talk, man.', 'Hi! There are MANY different paths that you can take as a means of treatment. First and foremost, you will NOT be put into a hospital! You should probably talk to your doctor for a means of treatment as a primary measure. He may diagnose you and give you pills that can improve your attitude, or he may schedule you to see a therapist, psychologist, etc. Ive actually had problems mentally, and the pills that I have taken have helped immensely. Im here to talk if youd Hyperactive behavior!', 'Im really sorry to hear that man. Although I hope you can learn from fucking up and use that to better yourself. Life is really precious. I know that it may seem hopeless, but think of all that you are leaving behind. Maybe find a psychologist to help you get back on your feet, and enjoy life. I really hope you make the right decision, mate.', 'Dont Anxiety. If you want, you dont have to mention your issues with the lady over the phone. Id just ask for an appointment. When talking to the doctor, you should definitely be 100% honest with him. You will get the best treatment possible. And dont Anxiety about police action. You arent breaking any laws! Youre getting the help you need in a healthy way : )', 'They can really get inside your head, sometimes even more so than you, yourself can, and they really can help you. I really would Hyperactive behavior you to at least give it a try, and see how it helps you. Try and pull through until morning, and search for any in your area using Google maps, etc. Make a meeting with one. You can pour out your feelings to him/her. Its always good to tell someone.', 'Do you want to talk about it? Why do you feel this way?', 'Youre doctor will likely refer you to a certified professional who deals with situations exactly Hyperactive behavior yours.', 'But why not enjoy your life? Theres been an almost impossible chance for all of the chain reactions in the history of the universe to ensure that you were ever born. You are so lucky to be alive. You may no longer care once you are dead, but dont you want to enjoy the time that you were gifted with, and spend that as long as you can? When you are gone, youre gone forever. Forever is a pretty long time, man.', 'Expensive? Do you have family support that could help you pull through? Friends, even?', 'What games do you play? :)', 'Shit...', 'Thus far. Make your time worth it. I understand that your life is utter shit right now. You need to be strong. Dont let this relationship keep you down. Get back up. Meet new people :)', 'Good. All fathers should love their children infinitely Hyperactive behavior yourself. You need to keep telling yourself that. Be there for him, for when he will need you later in life. His first day of school, his graduation, his wedding. Dont you want to be there to support him, and love him?', 'Everyone is beautiful. I know that sounds cliche and stupid, but its true. Being overweight is a problem many people face, and I want you to know that killing yourself is not the way to resolve this situation. Im here if you want to talk.', 'You should seek a new psychiatrist immediately. No professional should act Hyperactive behavior they dont care about your current situation. I understand that you must be very Stress about your condition, and I truly am sorry for that. No words of encouragement can cure it. I hope you can pull through, and live your life, instead of ending it. Once youre gone, youre gone forever. Im here if youd Hyperactive behavior to talk.', 'Thats awesome. I dont personally play that. Do you have Steam?

Supportive

Im probably a bastard for posting this, but I hope you spend the time to watch: [Free will?](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rglQHgMdHuQ)', 'Another example of aspiration as a stupid, destructive force. Look, you are not going to be happy by having a particular physical appearance, a certain weight, a certain X, a certain Y or a certain Z. You wasted some time of your life, some money (which you claim to have plenty of) and some of your motivation. Big whoop. People go on and on about "living life to the fullest" and other arbitrary value judgmentalist mantras, which Irritable Mood about as much as staring at a wall and seeing "God".. There are probably other things you find enjoying, but you keep on listing that crap Hyperactive behavior it matters. Think about it, you are a mammal surrounded by assemblances of tools and their bi-products. You have resources at your disposal and you are complaining. Here is something to let you get over yourself.. I dont care. No-one here gives a damn beyond wanting to type some symbols for you to electronically infer the grunting noises they represent so you can in turn have an emotional reaction to them.. There better? Now go make some tea and get to know yourself or some other such shit.', 'Appropriate questions, wrong person.', 'I would Hyperactive behavior to thank you all for your supportive comments. I recently read [an advisory comment](http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/nblgw/older_redditors_what_advice_would_you_give_the/) that has been rather insightful. In combination with your help and this sage wisdom, I may not be fully clear of my suicidal ideation, but I do feel more confident in seeking help.Thanks again', 'TLDR - "This too will pass" (?)', 'Most genuine problems I have seen since coming on this site... All a person has is what is happening right now. Thanks for saying this.', 'Ah.. In that case I will play the bastard for a moment, you are on Suicide watch and concerned about your mum knowing you smoke weed.. Think about that. Which has more clout, your mom catches you with a Pain localised and berates you. Or your mom walks in and finds your corpse. Which is more daunting a prospect?Given you are in college right now, you are emplyed (which is a damn sight more successful than many I know) and you are not yet dead. As for what you mentioned about your friends working a "high-school" job, have you ever gone to your local shop and seen a 60-something year old man working behind the counter who is obviously unwell and working to survive and thought about how your mother might catch you unwell.. This world is shit man, I wont disagree, but these reasons can be resolved in a short space of time. When your fees are covered, you get to live separate from your parents. As your friends are making themselves their own lives and you your own, you can spend time getting to know yourself and make new friends. Short of being in a constant risk of no prospects I think you are in a bad place right now. For you though, even with a constant depression, things can get better.', 'Have you tried taking the passive approach. Like just sitting there and not moving or thinking and letting the desire run through but not acting on it?Kind of Hyperactive behavior meditating, just clear your mind and sit perfectly still.', '>Ibipolar was ruled out because, get this, I dont hear voices. What the....? Voices? This is confusing. What!?!?Words cannot describe...Im with you bro/sis so if anything else, I know that feel. Maybe if we got enough people together we could all sit staring at the clouds. One more thing. You are not fucked up. You are unfortunate enough to be human amongst other humans. Its a terrible tragedy.', 'I didnt think so either, not then. I hope it works out for you.', 'We are fucking about on reddit.. Quit being an idiot, we are blatantly time wasting morons on here..', 'I can sympathise MM..point by point:* Bed is awesome and warm and cosy.* If you pay for Uni, maybe you should pack it in. At least until you know what you want to do later. You have a whole life to make mistakes in.* YES! This a million times. Fucking catch 22 situation right. Cant meet people who would suit because of not meeting people. * I dont know what to say about this. It sucks being on edge. How do people do it?* Not pathetic.. Well, not as pathetic as you think. Its a horrible distortion to feel this way. * I know that feel.* :( Oh god. * Yup, know that feel.* Not knowing where to direct the Anger is awful right?* I smoke. That is supposedly self-harming. Likewise, it feels good. Hell even getting short of breath and rarely aches in my ribs feels Hyperactive behavior something. So whilst I cant fully understand this habit, that is where I am coming from.Hopefully you can tell I am sympathising with you. I wont know your life, but there is a bit of info on me. No judgement.All I can say is, help isnt all professionals. **But** they are the most experienced at it. If they are callous and turn you away or dismiss your situation, sorry, but they are paid but not pro. I dont know if it helps, but not being alone in understanding that although not standard, you are not absurdly out of touch. People need to deal with it. A doctor will have to take you seriously eventually. If they dont you are in every right to get Anger if they are continually neglecting their oath to do no harm.I cant say everyone finds it this hard. I hear "not thinking about it" helps. That being easier said than done of course. You may not need help, but no-one here can truly know enough to pass that judgment. The question is;Do you think you need help? It comes down to that really. The rest is getting it.', 'My mother had the same attitude.. She used to be abusive and Violent too. Thing is, these people can be quite cowardly in the face of it. If you do what you need to do without consulting them they hate it, but the more you ignore their demands in light of what you need to be well, they will back down. They have no choices, but you can have them.', 'I found something that helped: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rglQHgMdHuQ', 'I appreciate your perspective. I suppose my perspective might be appropriate for you, that is not only a temporary solution, it may actually come back to hit you hard later on. I dont know you, and I dont know your life, but if you can be that way without something hanging over you constantly, try a little more compassion in exchange for selfishness. You can give yourself scars keeping up that approach for too long, and that is what I allude to in my post. Why do I say this? Because I tried a similar tactic for a long time, and should have seen the problem with it. I may not be here in a year or two, but take it from me, that shit can be a killer. Yet, you can live with your problem (I could too for a time) maybe if something doesnt wait around your corner you can keep doing that..', 'Why did you say HIV and then mention HPV.. Do you Irritable Mood this: [Human Papillomavirus](https://secure.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/wiki/Hpv)?Because there is a vaccine being developed for that.. Its better not to mix those two up. Which is possibly what you did, considering its association with genital warts. In which case, wear protection, seek treatment and allow time for it to clear. You never know, limiting sexual contact temporarily may allow for developing a relationship with your woman.', 'Well I can think of one thing.. Assuming you pay for these things yourself (including the smokes), you can come clean on smoking. When you go home, you are at home. Alotting time is not that important, you are only there as much as you will share anyway. That is about the limit of my suggestions. I also do not have faiths banding me to attaching myself to life or fear of death. I see some major issues that a great number of people either simply overlook or are complacent with - not knowing what to do with it. So at the very least; Hello. Also, [Absurdism](https://secure.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/wiki/Absurdism).', 'You just pointed out **TWO** options and then said that **every** path is hopeless. What about these:What age are you? If you are above the age of majority I can see no reason why you seeking out medical help yourself would be of detriment, even in that environment. Youve already placed a target smack bang on your fathers head here. I guess the question that you should ask yourself is, are you considering Suicide (at least on some level) as a way to get at your father AND escape your misery. All I am suggesting is you should consider the roots of this first. You could be in a state now, but if you go get your own help at the very least that sense of agency could help you out. Even if you do resolve for Suicide later on.Think for a second, you are trapped and are considering the most exemplary option of agency (self-termination) as the option. So, it would be rather inconsequential, but effective, to do what you need to do and go sort out your own shit. In spite of your father.

Supportive

Damn that hit home for me for sure. Im in the same boat as you man, minus doing the physical pain. What triggered my perception of life to change was smoking a ton of weed the past year and its made me think differently and I dont Hyperactive behavior it either. What is it that you really hate about yourself exactly, your appearance, what you do day to day, how you talk or what exactly?', 'No I already did and I want you to state why you cant right here. All of the stuff in your posts are possible to get better at and are manageable. Let me tell you something, my grandmother lived in Taiwan and China and Japan were feuding over Taiwan because its between the 2 countries. Well my Grandma was so poor that from age 10 she was working and by age 13 she was on her own living in the streets of a broken city. She rose out of that waitressing and every day fighting her way out while extremely Depressed mood. She got out when she was 18 and she is the happiest person I know. Tell me and list here how you cant get better and whats so bad.', 'First steps are never the bestIts after that we learn the restBut the way to successIs by taking that first stepDont get discouraged nowItll all come back aroundTake away all the doubtAnd just take what youve found', 'I am motivated by the thought of one day being happy and feeling fulfilled in life. I still have days that Im super Depressed mood and I still get that feeling, but I am actively making little steps and going out of my comfort zone and feeling generally uncomfortable but when I make those little breakthroughs I realize that its still possible, thats what Im holding onto.', 'Your very young and let me tell you something, your mind will lie to you and make you feel bad. The Mental Depression is trying to indoctrinate you and each time you have the thoughts that are negative and you dont try to correct it, you are feeding it and letting it take you over more and more. Every time you have a negative thought you need to realize that it is not real, it is not the truth. You are not worthless, you have much to live for and life is beautiful. If you want to be happy then you need to make things happy for yourself and improve aspects of your life that you do not Hyperactive behavior. The problem with Mental Depression is that its telling you that things CANT change or that they WONT change or something of those lines and you know what, thats horse shit. You need to let your mind know that and to really try. Go out of your comfort zone to make friends, take little steps and be patient. Things do not happen instantly, you need to give it time. I understand that your young and when you are young its easy to believe things Hyperactive behavior there is no hope, but is that true? No it is not. Be honest with yourself and fight your fears. Do what makes you happy and dont hesitate to do that.', 'Okay man you need to break this cycle: Look at yourself. You cant see into the future. You dont know that it wont get better. Your making that happen by not doing anything. Your just going to keep making yourself worse if you keep letting your negative thoughts Hyperactive behavior "I know I wont get better." get through to you. I want you to go re read that comment, and I want you to say thats fucking bullshit. You cant look into the future you have no away of KNOWING that it will get better. You can get better you need to change your thinking or you might not get better. Do you want to get better?', 'Im sorry its 2 in the morning Ill be back later.', 'Im sorry youve been pushed this far man. I hope you dont go through with it.', 'And you know what Im telling you you can change all of that. ', 'Yeah I Irritable Mood I guess that is the truth of it somewhat. Your lasting value is the legacy you leave behind but that will still die out in time. That doesnt Irritable Mood it cant affect others after you. I believe every time we collide with someone we cant not affect them be it not in a totally profound way sometimes, but we all still matter you know? Dont dwell on the fact that we all die, its really not what matters in life. What matters is to try to live out your life and be happy you know what I Irritable Mood?', 'Only way to get better is to practice and give it a real shot, you know?', 'Yeah its definitely not all situations, but Ill say that sometimes you do need to put your foot down and tell people Hyperactive behavior it is. Take [this](http://www.reddit.com/r/SuicideWatch/comments/1obimk/sometimes_i_feel_like_i_wanna_die/ccqh6eg) thread talk I had with this kid. Your right too, its really fucked up to troll here Hyperactive behavior its probably the worst spot in all of reddit to troll, I actually cant believe people would do that here its just disgusting.', 'You need to fight your mind my friend. Dont be afraid to talk to people, if they are true friends then they will still accept you and even more they should want to help you. If you arent comfortable with talking to your friends then talk to family about it. I felt the same way for 2 years and I kept suffering and didnt talk to anyone. One day I had a Panic Attacks attack in the car after a family trip because I felt so lonely and I couldnt stop crying. Thats when my family really stepped up for me and tried to make me feel better. Dont be afraid to talk to family friend. Fight the negative thoughts in your mind, Hyperactive behavior your head might tell you something Hyperactive behavior "Your worthless" or something and you tell your mind "No Im not worthless.". Or maybe the Suicide thoughts Hyperactive behavior "I should just kill myself" tell your mind (think) that you shouldnt kill yourself. Please talk to someone, it will make you feel alot better. In fact PM me please and we can talk about it. Id be happy too man.', 'Things will get better for you for sure, when you turn 18 your parents cant be so super controlling. Do your sisters support you? Whats the deal with them?', 'Im sorry thats happening to you, my father is Depressed mood too and Im in a similar situation as you. Your sibling doesnt want to live anymore I think you two really need each other in this moment then. Is there anything that comes to mind at all that is positive in your life at the moment? ', 'Listen to logic and you know thats not true. Its what you believe.Look at these lyrics."Human Beings in a mobWhats a mob to a kingWhats a king to a godWhats a god to a non-believerWho dont believe in anything"What do you think that means? ', 'You sound really busy, I feel Hyperactive behavior you really need that leisure time man. I feel for you. ', 'Why not?', 'Well Ive never been that deep in Hyperactive behavior you are. I can tell you though that life is definitely not fair and that we all make mistakes and that whats important is that we learn from them. Its good you understand that you did what you had to do. Do you really forgive yourself though for those mistakes youve made and your past, or are you just trying to forget it all?', 'Yeah that makes sense. You are still stuck in the past a bit and your family just wants to forget it, they are both opposite ideas of dealing with it. Do you know what your looking for exactly or are you just generally feeling lost?', 'Its alright man thats what were here for. Do you talk to your parents about this? Do they understand Hyperactive behavior REALLY understand how you feel?', 'Thank you man. Really helps.', 'If you want to get better then you will keep saying that and you will at least try to say I CAN. ', 'I think you would be surprised. Tell them how long youve been thinking about Suicide, tell them that you are lonely, tell them that you dont know what to do and tell them that you are Social fear that you might end up killing yourself and that you need help. You cant be going through this alone.Other then that the only way to get better is to fight it. Keep fighting it and fight it hard. Push yourself a little a day take yourself out of your comfort zone and try to make friends. Its gonna be hard but this is the way to beating it. You need to be patient too and dont give up, keep trying. ', 'We put power in what we believe, there is so much power in what we believe. You can put power in believing that things cant change, or you can believe that you can change and then it can happen. Your going through denial right now and your letting your mind win. You let it happen to yourself your right but your letting things keep escalating by not fighting and just accepting that you cant change. To think that things cant get better for yourself that you cant make friends is just delusional, do you understand that? ', 'Tell me whats so bad that it cant get better. Your too young for that to be true.', 'If you gave up a long time ago when your only 15 that means that its been indoctrinating you for a very long time and that right now you really need to break it. You want it to get better but youve resigned to accepting that you cant. Let me tell you something, YOU CAN. What youve been wanting to believe that it can is true. All of the mountains in your life that you feel that you cant climb are not as Drug abuse as you think, your mind is telling you that. Each time you try you probably think of the worst scenario possible and it seems so much worse then it really is, but its actually not. The problem is you dont believe in yourself. Dont let this take you over. The first step I am telling you to get better is to say that it CAN get better. Im not saying that they will, but you need to just accept the literal FACT that it CAN get better. Once you accept that then we can talk about the 2nd step. The fact that you are posting things Hyperactive behavior Sometimes I feel I wanna die and Im feeling down (I need help) means that somewhere inside you you do know that its true, and that you just dont know where to start to get better. ', 'You say your Social fear to talk to people, well I think thats a good place to start on making yourself happy. Talk to friends/family man, theres gotta be someone there to help you. More then anything just do stuff and keep yourself busy, just do anything. You need to quit hating yourself as well, you are going to the gym and you are working on your body, let that motivate you. Invest in yourself, believe in yourself. If you need someone to talk to you can always PM me. I got you man.', 'Give me a few then. Surely you can do that.', 'Why do you feel the need to die friend?', 'Yeah things will feel out of your comfort zone, but you kinda need to do those things to get better out of them. Thats how you get comfortable you know?', 'No problem. Feel free to PM not a bother to me whatsoever. ', 'Hey you. Im sorry you feel so lost, tell me what you think is the root of the Anxiety Mental Depression / Mental Depression and lets talk about them. I know how you feel about the Psychiatrist stuff by the way, I went to one and I was supposed to have a full hour right? Well, she started 10 minutes late and basically only listened to what I had to say and didnt give me any advice afterwards and just kinda Ventricular Dysfunction, Left me to think of things for myself making me feel Hyperactive behavior shit afterwards. Shed always just give me stupid generic answers when I asked her what to do when shed cut me off 10 minutes as well (40 minutes total a session...) Hyperactive behavior oh talk to people and whatnot. Shit sucks.', 'Well first of all can you tell why you want to kill yourself? How old are you, whats bothering you, when did you start feeling this way ?', 'Stop right now. Stop all of the negative thoughts. I challenge you to give 1 year of working hard to improve yourself in all of the areas that you dont Hyperactive behavior yourself in and to see how things turn out for yourself. Work for it, dont be lazy and try your best to stay positive. I understand youve been window shopping death for 8 years and I am with you on that, it sucks. What changed my life from doing that is I decided I would take 1 year of trying my best to make friends, work on fixing my subconscious from being so negative and trying to be happy. If things had not at least gotten better, then I decided that I would commit Suicide. Things werent all fixed through the year, but things were better so I decided to go again. Death is so permanent, you cant go back and you already have 20 years invested man.You cant give up brother, you are still so young, and you have so much to live for. Just because your beginning was Muscle Weakness does not Irritable Mood that you cant turn it all around, you need to believe in yourself and you need to truly give yourself a shot. Focus on the bright sides and dont let the negative take over, or it will, that is a self made prophecy.Work on talking to your sister, try to get on her side and find out if maybe she is just rotten you know? Dont let her bring you down. Tell her how you feel and dont go this alone. You seem Hyperactive behavior a good person and you know what that does Irritable Mood something. You are in a hole but you definitely have the means to make new friends, TO talk to your family more and sew up some holes. Most of all I dont want you to go this alone, PLEASE PM me whenever you are feeling lonely or sad and I would love to make you feel better man. Dont let uncertainty cloud you.First steps are never the bestIts after that we learn the restBut the way to successIs by taking that first stepDont get discouraged nowItll all come back aroundTake away all the doubtAnd just take what youve found', 'Damn that is really rough. Is there anyone that you can reach out for that cares for you Hyperactive behavior any family, friends? What makes you happy in general ?', 'I can tell you one thing for sure, thats that the most common thing and the strongest thing that keeps people from killing themselves is knowing that it will Chest Pain the ones they love. Let him know how much you really care for him, let him know your there for him ect. Try having a talk with him and getting down to the root of why he is Depressed mood and whatnot. I hope this advice helps you but Im only 16 - turning 17 soon so I really dont know anything about guns and whatnot.', 'Okay well I am going to tell you that you CAN change and that you CAN get better. You need to understand that you CAN get better. To say "I want to get better but I fucking cant" is completely wrong, that is implying that its impossible. If you truly want to get better, right now Im gonna tell you the first step to getting better is to accept that you CAN get better. Please tell me that.', 'Alright fair enough. Keep fighting and make some changes. You cant keep doing the same thing and expecting for something to change, thats literally insanity. Go out of your comfort zone, each day make a little step. Things will get easier for you but first they have to get hard.', 'Thats what I thought too and you know what it took them a while to, but sooner rather then later they understood and it felt Hyperactive behavior a giant weight was lifted off and that I wasnt so alone in the fight. Its a lot easier to keep going when you have help.', 'How long have you felt that way and what is causing you to feel that way? Loneliness, boredom, an event that has happened recently or what? How young are you?

Indicator

Rejection can suck sometimes, but at least you know that you want a good life for yourself and future spouse! Thats reason enough to not give up. Dont let it bring you down, I wish you the best of luck. ', 'No matter what, it is best for you to remain strong. I know, its tough as hell to deal with life after youve already attempted taking it away. Ive attempted twice in the past but Im still here. I do agree, the outside world is terrifying but you cannot let that hold you back. Start off with small things(book stores, coffee shops, etc.) before attempting to go into bigger(malls, amusement parks, etc). Get comfortable with yourself, thats what I did. Im still working on it, but Im slowly starting to enjoy being out whereas I used to hate it. Another thing, never pay attention to what others think or say. If all they have to say is negative, then they arent worth paying attention to. You need to try and be positive, even when the world around you drags you down. Just believe and know that one day, you will find someone who will love you for you and things will get better. It may not happen soon, but it will happen soon enough. Just do not lose faith Hyperactive behavior so many do. ', 'That was really great and made me feel pretty good. Thanks for that, great work as well!', 'Man, Im sorry you have to go through this. Youre family is wrong, you shouldnt kill yourself. Im sorry to hear how you feel as well, its hard. Trying to live life and be somewhat happy when everything just seems so shit. Its hard to cope with, but we have to try. Try and think things will get better. But that also requires to push yourself as well. You cant just expect things to get better, you need to work hard at it. Use your family as your motivation. Work hard and show them that they are wrong. Live life well and prove them all wrong. I wish you the best of luck.', 'Wow, now I understand. That really is something and it puts you in a tough situation. Well, lets hope the next 18 months go pretty decent with no unwanted surprises happening. At least until youre able to get yourself situated and leave for Japan. ', 'I cant speak for everybody, but for me personally, I enjoy having someone to talk to about my problems. Ive suffered from severe Mental Depression for years now and attempted Suicide twice. My life is far from perfect and I become unhappier every day that passes. I spend so much time alone with my thoughts, that they build up until I feel so overwhelmed I dont see any other way but to die. I understand what you Irritable Mood by when it comes to the average person, I feel the same way. I usually open up to people who have been in similar positions as myself or can relate in a way. Honestly, talking to someone, whether it is just to vent or to seek advice, it helps me feel better. And if Im talking to someone who understands and can help me, its great to have another point of view on things. Sometimes I can only see my problems from my point of view or another, but when I talk to someone who knows me and my problems, they usually are able to give me another view on the problem and it helps me come up with a better solution. I try not to be a burden to others, I hate the feeling and sometimes I cannot help it. But they insist Im not and Hyperactive behavior to help, as I try to do for others. ', 'Its easy to just end it, especially once youre intoxicated. But you shouldnt. Im also in a long-distance relationship and it is hard as hell to deal with. Especially when you feel distant from them emotionally. Im sorry to hear about you being unemployed, have you not been able to get any kind of government assistance or anything? I assume youve been job searching and I wish the best of luck in that, I know it can be tough nowadays. As for the writing thing, dont give up on that. We all express ourselves differently. You may think you suck at writing, but others might quite Hyperactive behavior it. Id be happy to read whatever you wanted to share. When I first started battling severe Mental Depression, I turned to writing as a way to talk myself out of Suicide and express my feelings and thoughts. It helped me quite a bit. ', 'First off, I would Hyperactive behavior to wish you a happy birthday! Next, its good of you to share this. Its nice to be able to relieve yourself of the thoughts and feelings one has within. 42 may be old to you, but it is just a number. You still have plenty of time to make something of yourself. I hope everything goes well for you. Your situation sounds tough, but hopefully it will all get better soon. But dont let it get you down on your birthday! Again, happy birthday(:', 'I strongly suggest this. When I first started to suffer from severe Mental Depression, I turned to poetry. I start to fill page after page of what I was feeling and what was on my mind. It helped me a lot, especially when you have no one else to go to. ', 'First thing first, dont end it tonight, please. Just give it time. Im here for you. Lets talk. I will try to help as best as I can. ', 'Anytime, Ill always be a PM away. I wish you the best of luck!', 'You need to find a reason to keep living. Something to give your life meaning and to make you happy. May seem impossible, but you have to try and try until you succeed.', 'I understand what you Irritable Mood. Hopefully by Christmas things will get better for you. Life can be hell for some of us, we just need to do our best to survive through it. I hope in the end, youll be happy. ', 'Well, in whatever you choose to do, I wish you the best of luck. Just keep in mind you wont have to deal with it for much longer. ', 'Hi there, stranger! See? Now were acquaintances. I can relate to how you feel about the job thing. You just either need to find something you enjoy doing more or find a happy medium. Work can become repetitive and if you do not enjoy it and cannot get another job. It is best to pick a hobby or something to keep your mind off of it. When Im at work, I try and make whatever I am doing fun by turning it into a mini game for myself. Keeps me entertained and makes time go by faster. ', 'You need to do whats best for you. If youre unhappy, do whatever it is that will make you happy. Its going to be tough, but I here for you if you ever need someone. Good luck on your situation!', 'Anytime, if you ever need to talk to someone, Im here(:And yeah, it seems kind of long now, but time will fly pretty quickly. Hopefully he wont go into more fits and the fights will Sedated state down. ', 'Glad you shared this, it certainly is something else. Happy early birthday, though! Your situation with your ex living with you for the next 18 months(possibly), pretty much sucks. I hope, if you arent able to find another room mate or something, that the next 18 months goes decent until you are able to leave with your friend to go live in Japan. Which, by the way, is pretty cool. I thought about doing that at one point but I dont make enough at the moment and it would take me forever to save up. Hope things get better for you!', 'Glad you were able to continue on, I hope all goes well for you!', 'I hope you dont do anything rash. You may feel Hyperactive behavior you are a burden to others, but you arent. Many times we think we are a burden onto others; when in reality, we are appreciated but it just isnt communicated well. ', 'Im glad you decided to share this, its good to vent everything out Hyperactive behavior that. Theres nothing I can really say that you probably havent heard before. I feel for you and I do hope things get better for you. Hopefully your boyfriend will start to change and things improve. If you ever need a friend to talk to or vent, Im always here. ', 'He seems to have made his mind up for some time. I dont know if it will help, but I can try. ', 'Have you tried looking for other jobs besides working at the grocery store? That seems to be a part of the problem. If you hate it and it drives you crazy, itll just continue to bring you down. Finding another job, preferably one you might enjoy Hyperactive behavior your other one, could help you in the long run. At least with keeping a slightly positive mental state since you wont have to Anxiety about having a job you hate anymore. ', 'Im here for you if you want to talk. Life can be tough, especially when you arent able to talk to someone about what goes on through your mind and life. ', 'I wish I could change your mind but you seem to have it made up. It is a shame though. I understand life is hard. Honestly, it fucking sucks at times. It seems to never get better, just progressively worse until we cant take it anymore. But at that point, we need to struggle and push through. Try and stay postivie and continue living. No matter how Depressed mood life can get, strive to be happy. I wish you would give it more time. You might have already, but you never know whats waiting for you in the future. ', 'Thats the thing, you Are strong enough. We all are. We just need to push ourselves to get better. Yeah, we can ask others for help but in the end, its up to us and whether or not we truly believe we can better ourselves. Just please, do not do anything to harm yourself or end your life. I understand things are rough now and there seems to be no other way. Just be patient. Push through for now. Things will get better. And thank you. I dont think Im an incredible person, I just hate seeing someone feeling and thinking Hyperactive behavior I constantly did and still do. Youre an incredible person, for making it this far. ', 'Just checked out this account for the first time in months. This is great news! Glad things are working out for you!', 'I know, thanks. I feel a bit relieved at the moment, so it helped. ', 'Im really sorry to hear that. I know its hard when nothing seems to get better. I wish youd keep trying though. Its easy to give up but harder to keep going. But in the end, its worth it. ', 'Have you tried looking for jobs outside of the career field youre wanting to get into? I know it may not be what you want, but the money from it can support you until youre able to get the job you want. I know its hard to find a job nowadays. ', 'First thing first, keep yourself distracted. Whatever it is that you are feeling, dont give it the opportunity to get worse. Listen to music, go for a walk, do something to clear your mind. ', 'Thank you, I appreciate it. And yes, I dont think the thoughts ever do go away. They just get shoved to side until youre vulnerable again before they reveal themselves once more. ', 'Youre welcome(: ', 'I can relate. That feeling of boredom can be horrendous to deal with. Have you tried picking up a hobby or challenging yourself with tasks you might enjoy? Im still trying to find ways to rid myself of boredom, but I have picked up a few hobbies that keep myself busy and it passes time.

Ideation

i remember when i was a senior last year in HS i was bored of everything just being the same over and over nothing was changing. i had a troubled life at home as well and i was just Exhaustion of nothing changing. ', 'whats wrong?', 'no i see it', 'fact of the matter is life sucks, it may seem Hyperactive behavior not much is changing but you are about to make a huge change in your life, you are going to be looking at colleges. that is a huge change, that will shake things up for you. Many people find there significant other in college so dont get to caught up on this hopelessness feeling with the girl. Tell her how you feel and if she doesnt respond well its her loss. you will just find someone who will be there for you in anyway you need

Indicator

It took several Suicide attempts before I broke down and sought help.Please dont let it go that far.', 'Im working on a fairly ambitious side project... Id love to talk more about it but I wont since it would disclose my identity. Suffice it to say you may hear about it on r/programming/ from time to time, and hopefully increasingly often here in the next few months as I land some big milestones.I too enjoy making games; I hope your project goes well and continues to be fulfilling for you.I really Hyperactive behavior exercising when I can, especially in cooler weather, because it really does help get me going again. Problem is, Im far enough down right now that I have no physical energy, Im feverish and aching all over (fairly common psychosomatic side effects of Mental Depression), and the thought of doing my usual 5-6 mile walk or something just makes me feel more Exhaustion. Ill do what I Can, though, and hopefully itll help at least a bit.', 'I find that typically my worst brushes with this feeling occur when Im not on my medication.For me, when I really dont want to do something, it just damn well will not get done. Period. I can rationalize, cajole, yell, anything - nothing will convince me to do it. Its Hyperactive behavior all the systems in my brain - fear of failure, fear of consequences, desire to succeed - all just shut down and stop responding. I cant logically or emotionally make myself do anything about it.When medicated, this just doesnt seem to be an issue for me. If I dont want to do something, I can usually find the motivation - it has to get done or XYZ consequences will occur; or I really do want to do it, I just need a kick to get started; or whatever. Work comes easily enough and with proper breaks and resting periods I can cope with a fairly hefty load of responsibilities.Even a day without the drugs, though, and that all goes straight to hell. Then its back in I Dont Care Land, where nothing can convince me to do anything useful. Often, this includes catching up on the meds, which means that missing a dose usually winds up in a weeks-long downward spiral of nastiness.Bottom line: Im relying heavily on my treatment to deal with this. I honestly hope it isnt that severe for you, since it can be utterly crippling and self-reinforcing once it kicks in. Micro-goals are a good technique (thats been discussed in other responses) and I think thats a great place to start; it certainly helps me with feeling less overwhelmed by large tasks. Ultimately, though, dont be afraid to talk to your doctor and experiment with some medicinal solutions to the problem - IF AND ONLY IF you cant solve it on your own.', 'Actually, a total lack of energy and motivation is a common sign of Mental Depression, or a Mental Depression episode. Most people associate "Mental Depression" with "I feel sad" but this is a misconception.Clinical Mental Depression can range anywhere from a simple emotional Ache to complete Indifferent mood to irritability and Anger. A common element is _anhedonia_ wherein you lack the ability to enjoy or care about anything.My Mental Depression periods generally do include emotionally feeling "down", but during the milder run-up to the worst parts, typically consist of just not wanting to do anything at all. For me the most frustrating part is that it occurs _without_ any sort of rational explanation or cause; I have no good reason to feel bad or apathetic, I just do.A lot of people Hyperactive behavior to hand out callous "advice" Hyperactive behavior "oh, just go for a jog, or watch a funny movie, or hang out with some friends and distract yourself." Its incredibly hard to communicate to them that its not possible to do that; even if you can drag yourself out to go participate in some activity, you get nothing from it. This is what separates true Mental Depression from just bad moods, and what makes it (for me) painfully difficult to explain my disorder to someone whos never been there.', 'Im Type I. No ADHD though.', 'I cant promise you much time, because Im pretty close to checking out myself. But if I can use that time to do something more productive than practice my carving skills on my wrists, you have my attention.I also have a lot of reasons not to feel this way. Sometimes all the reasons in the world cant outweigh how much it hurts.I am, unfortunately, just a stranger. But look on the bright side: you dont have to pay me to care.And Im not pretending.', 'Dont try to fix it. For someone who is Depressed mood enough to seriously consider taking their own life, all the answers in the world - no matter how sincere, well-meaning, or even correct - will seem trite, inconsiderate, and hollow. It can be incredibly hard to resist the urge to try to make everything better, but the reality is that the best thing you can do is be there, and *care*.Its good that youre concerned, and good that youre nervous about dealing with it alone - because I dont think anyone can deal with this kind of stuff alone. The more support you can muster - even from Internet strangers - the better.Just be around. Dont try and draw her out; let her open up in her own time. It can be incredibly difficult to talk about this stuff, especially the first time. But through it all, stick by her and be available for when the time does come.Do your best to not be harsh or judgmental, but be aware that you might be perceived as being those things anyways. Suicidal Mental Depression warps perception in very strange ways. The best I can suggest is to be as Disturbance in attention as you can, and dont take Hostility or frustration on her part personally - those are just part of the battle shes fighting.', 'I can understand your situation very well.I too feel a split in my mind, between rational, clear thought, and the depraved, senseless destruction that is my disorder. Problem is, the rational bit is very tiny, and very much not in control. It feels very afraid of the other majority, and it wants desperately to make it all go away, but isnt always sure it can take the steps necessary to do so.Ive routinely lied and manipulated the truth in front of my doctors. Nobody knows the full picture of what Ive gone through - just bits and select pieces, as I feel they need to know. (This is the diseased half of me deciding this, by the way - my little healthy slice wants desperately to be able to just spill it all out, let everyone know exactly how bad things really are, but... I just dont. I dont even know why.)Ive struggled with alcoholism and heavy tobacco use. Ive struggled with adrenaline Drug craving and all kinds of destructive behaviour. Theres so much stuff that I just cant and wont talk about... as much as I wish I could.But theres a bright side to this. My doctor continually reassures me that the best weapon one can possibly have in fighting mental and emotional problems is that little slice of awareness. Thats what it takes to know to get help, to make the scary decisions, to open up and accept that things must change in order to improve your life. Its Hyperactive behavior any other part of your mind: you have to exercise it to make it stronger.Thrive on that little slice. Understand that you dont necessary have to fix everything all at once - in fact, thats probably too much to try to do anyways (at least for me). But taking steps is good, and any start is a good start.Keep that slice alive, and give it time to grow. Ive improved in my compliance with taking medication. Ive improved in my ability to be honest about my situation. And Ive improved a lot in seeking help when the worst times strike. So I know theres hope.You, Hyperactive behavior me, have a tremendous amount of life ahead of you. Heres hoping that both of us can embrace it and enjoy it for its good parts, and overcome the bad.', 'Thanks. Its easy to feel Hyperactive behavior Im channeling Hemmingway or something while Im Manic, but its kind of nice to hear that I actually am coherent. Frankly, there have been times when Ive written stuff while Manic, and come back to it later in a more sound mental state and just gone "WTF?!"', 'Did my lab work yesterday. So at least thats out of the way.Im no stranger to all this; Ive lived with it for the better part of two decades and Ive been diagnosed and dealing with medication adjustments of one kind or another for just over six years. I appreciate the feedback, and I hate to sound negative about what is certainly a genuine attempt to help, but... I kinda feel Hyperactive behavior youve missed the point. Maybe thats my fault for being a poor communicator, I dunno.Drinking replaced other substance abuse issues in my life - mostly prescription abuse - and it already feels Hyperactive behavior a fallback. Its what I do when Im trying _not_ to do something worse.Cutting is very much the same. In my world, it makes more sense to flirt with a little incision or two than to flirt with putting a loaded gun in my mouth. Its already a replacement for a terrible habit.I know how to live with my own addled brain. Ive certainly had enough practice. Whats difficult isnt managing the intrusive thoughts, or handling the occasional minor mood swing, or any of that. Whats difficult is when there is literally nothing I can do to control what I feel and what I think.Its not because Im new to it or uneducated or poorly equipped to cope. Its because things are really, truly fucked up.Bleh. I hope I dont sound ungrateful, because Im not. I just feel Hyperactive behavior I wasnt clear about the reality of my situation, probably because Ive spent a lot of time here writing about my situation and sort of assume people will do some background research on me. Thats probably a dumb assumption, though :-)', 'Seriously?Whats with these quacks who think that its possible to just magically "gain control" of yourself and make the disorder go away? Its not under our control, thats what makes it a disease. If I could just "control myself" and stop feeling Depressed mood or Manic, dont you think I would? Do you really believe that I _want_ to be this way, and therefore dont take steps to change?I have no polite adjectives for the author of this nonsense.', 'I find that, unlike most cases, my Hypersomnia is controlled by my episodes and not vice versa. I can and will Hypersomnia fine most of the time, but as soon as a cycle starts, there is nothing at all I can do (including prescription Hypersomnia aids and stimulants) that will even my sleeping back out until everything dies down. As is normal, I Hypersomnia a lot more when Depressed mood and often go days without any Hypersomnia when Psychiatric symptom.', 'Oh, sure; I didnt meant to imply the math never (or even rarely) works in your favor. Just dont want to see you make any decisions based on false rigor.I think theres one other thing your model leaves out, to its detriment: your metric captures only a quantification of _how things are_. Something worth factoring into the system is the potential - in a physics sense - for that value to change. Youve described a number that you can graph over time as a simple planar curve; I think though that every point on that curve has an associated window of potential. At any given moment, theres how things _are_ and how things _could be_ - both in the positive and negative direction.Think of it Hyperactive behavior a statistical model. Youve captured the Irritable Mood of the data set - the way things are - but you have cropped out the standard deviation. A Irritable Mood by itself conveys very little information. You need to know not just where things stand now but how much better _or worse_ they could be at that given moment.Progress shouldnt be measured on the absolute scale youve described; instead, you should measure progress against the relative sliding window of potential. The closer you are to the lower bound, the worse things are; the more you tend towards the upper bound, the better things are. Of course absolute value is also important - it does after all affect the baseline of severity - but in measuring any kind of movement you need to take into account the margins.And youre right that its extremely hard to improve that absolute value, at any given moment in time. Whats substantially less difficult is to increase the upper bound of your potential window. Raising the lower bound can be tough as well, but its doable. If you continue to adjust the margins slowly and steadily, eventually you will inevitably shift the absolute instantaneous metric as well.Mathematics can be a very powerful way to justify decisions; but its always important to ensure that you have the most accurate model you can devise. Simplifying assumptions can be useful, but they can also distort perceptions in subtle and sometimes harmful ways. Im not saying youre wrong... just that you might want to double-check the equations.', 'I used to get that feeling a lot.So one day, I took a long weekend off work, got in the car, and just started driving aimlessly. Covered a couple thousand miles before I ended up looping around and coming back home a few days later.I dont know how practical that would be for you; youve mentioned a family and such, which I know can be hard to leave. But if theres any way you can pull it off, I can highly recommend the experience. A couple days to just think and clear your head and feel Hyperactive behavior you _are_ escaping might just do the trick.YMMV, of course.', 'I can recommend professional help, but be aware that the majority of "professionals" (psychologists, psychiatrists, MDs in general, and even professional counselors) are total crap. It may take some time and hopping to find someone you are really comfortable with and can work this out with.Theres always SW, too. We may not be professional, but theres some amazing people here.', 'Shit, son. I didnt believe in god. I **was** god.Manic Acute psychosis does some truly weird things to your mind. People talk about dropping acid as a gateway to the divine... they have _no idea_.Got lots of stories about those times, if youre interested. Im all druggified these days though so thankfully it doesnt happen too often anymore.', 'I think theres a difference between wanting to move on, and wanting to _forget_.For me personally, being Bipolar Disorder is an integral part of my past - and, in all probability, my future. I dont _like_ it per se, but its there, and for better or worse (ok, lets be honest, mostly worse) its made me into who I am _now_.The way I see it, we are not divorced from our symptoms or feelings. This isnt some "other person" living out their lives in our heads; whether we Hyperactive behavior it or not, _this is who we are_. Its not as if theres some other occupant upstairs being experimental, avant-garde, risk-taking, moody, voracious, megalomaniacal, elite, workaholic, melancholic, tormented, dark, or abstract. Thats _us_. You _were_ (and perhaps still _are_) all of those things - it isnt just some shell that you wear.Yes, those aspects of ourselves may be rooted in a disease, but that doesnt make them any less valid or any less personal and real. Genuine Acute psychosis aside, what we think and feel is more or less who we are.The obvious problem with this is that those things are often distasteful. Its not pleasant to think "hey, yeah, Im really whacked out." Especially as you mention when there are past deeds, damaged relationships, and general wasted time that we regret, it can be extremely difficult to accept. For my own part, there are certainly times when I _want_ all that to just be someone else taking over my body for a while. I _want_ to not be associated with a lot of those things.But in my thoroughly off-the-cuff and not-professionally-trained opinion, I think its important to see those things as part of your whole being. And that, I think, is the key - those things are _just a part_. There is more to you - more to all of us - than just being Bipolar Disorder. And there is more to be had than just symptoms, even if there have been times when the symptoms seem to dominate everything else.Theres an analogy I really Hyperactive behavior for this. Imagine a giant, bustling factory full of noisy machinery, yelling workers, and generally a bunch of deafening racket. Now imagine that Drug abuse up in the rafters of the building, a songbird has built a nest. Most of the time, when the factory is busy, youll never be able to hear that bird singing. But when everyone goes home and everything is shut down for the night, theres something of beauty and value to be found under the surface.Some of the time, maybe even most of the time, the noise of our Bipolar Disorder symptoms may be deafening. But that does not in any way subtract from the reality of the songbird sitting in the rafters, waiting for a chance to be heard.I think its awesome that youre on medication and doing better. I think thats a sign that youre in a good position to start listening for the bird singing, and hopefully to bring that sound to the forefront of your life.', 'I should note that most of the literature doesnt specifically refer to urination issues directly; however, it is almost always mentioned that blood sugar issues can occur with use of Geodon, and what you describe sounds Hyperactive behavior classic symptoms of such issues. Diabetes and Hypoglycemia symptoms are worth looking into to see if you show any other signs of blood sugar imbalance.I AM NOT A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL. Please take this as just friendly, concerned advice and nothing more!', 'Welcome to the crew :-)Ive been diagnosed for almost 5 years and still dont know what to think about it or how to deal with it. You get better at it, but I dont really think it ever gets easier.Shit, thats a real downer. Heres an imaginary donut to make your night better: O', 'Im afraid of the consequences. It might Irritable Mood he wants to adjust my medication again (which has been a living hell every time its been done in the past) or even have me committed. I guess its totally irrational, but it just seems Hyperactive behavior if I can control what he knows itll help control the course of my treatment. So ultimately Im the one who decides how things play out.Maybe it just boils down to a control issue, I dont know.', 'Oh, I know I didnt magically wish Bipolar Disorder disorder onto myself. Just kind of ironic that I remember thinking that as a kid, and then wham, I grow up and here I am.I get what youre saying about treatment helping, and I appreciate the sentiment... but what scares me is that even at my absolute best this kind of stuff haunts me. I cant increase my dosage of antidepressants without triggering Manic episodes, and I have bad side effects from all the mood stabilizers and antipsychotics Ive been on (especially at Drug abuse enough doses to control the antidepressant-induced Mania Leukemia, Myelocytic, Acute) so Im kind of stuck. My current cocktail does a great job of keeping me level and stable, but the thoughts never go away.Definitely going to bring this up with my doctor now that I realize it consciously, though, and see what he thinks.', 'I get that a lot during my Mental Depression/mixed episodes.Its come down to me getting very unpleasant with my friends at times, which makes it even more difficult for them to _want_ to be around when stuff gets bad. Sort of a self-reinforcing issue.No idea what to do about it.', 'Very unhappy. But I can remember, even at a young age, deliberately making decisions that would make me Depressed mood - Hyperactive behavior refusing to go to a friends party, or whatnot. Seems Hyperactive behavior this streak has been with me for as long as I can recall, so Im not sure I can solely blame it on my bad experiences growing up.', 'Im in a remarkably similar situation - 24, Bipolar Disorder, wrestling with Mania Leukemia, Myelocytic, Acute and mixed states at the moment. I can totally identify with your frustration and Anger at the way the world is. Sometimes I feel Hyperactive behavior itd be better if I could just go on a Panic spree and Bulimia Nervosa the planet of all the idiots and morons that Plague our lives.But you know, that really wouldnt solve anything. Even long after were gone, stupid people will exist. So thinning the herd so to speak isnt all that productive, and it robs more or less innocent people of the chance to better themselves.Anyways... if youre still seeing your doctor, I strongly recommend you tell him or her about this. It sounds Hyperactive behavior youre having a very typical reaction to your medication which can be controlled by supplementing your regimen with a mood stabilizer. Ask specifically about mood stabilizers and antipsychoctics. Theyve done wonders for me personally. I still have those times when my brain is running a million miles an hour and going no place fast, but theyre few and far between, and only last a few hours now.Guess I just wanted to say that theres plenty of hope and theres a good (possible) solution to your situation. Hang in there.', 'Im Type I with ultradian rapid cycling (i.e. I can have several swings between extremes in a single day).Generally rapid cycling seems to be less well-understood by most doctors, even psychiatric specialists; I dont know why, but my guess is because its less common. Ive never heard a really good definition of what qualifies, but most rapid cyclers Ive heard of have pretty similar patterns, myself included.Less severe episodes are actually not uncommon either; not every single experience is either whacked-out Mania Leukemia, Myelocytic, Acute or deep depression. Probably 80% of my cycles (medicated or otherwise) are just abnormally Drug abuse or low moods (and other symptoms - energy levels etc.) and they occur fairly often, probably every couple of months or so. Really extreme episodes are maybe once or twice a year.In any case, though, definitely bring up your concerns with a psychiatrist. See if you can get a good talk therapist too; for a lot of people early in the Bipolar Disorder diagnosis/treatment process, it takes a long time to really wrap your mind around whats going on and come to accept it. The sooner you can become comfortable with a diagnosis and treatment plan the sooner you can start regaining control.', 'Meh. Ive given up on romantic relationships in general.I understand the sentiment though. I definitely get along a _lot_ better with people who have first-hand experience with mood disorders, because they at least know what _not_ to do when Im not perfectly even.There are rare occasional people who are "normal" and still somewhat understanding and supportive - but rare is the operative word.', 'Still here.Days are usually the easy part, though. Give me a couple hours to sit around at home and well see how it goes :-)', 'Give it time.Be there when you need to be, but _never_ push. When Im Depressed mood, any probing at all, no matter how well-intentioned, will make me extremely Anger and liable to do something very, very horrible.Trust is very hard to nurture, especially with BD (and the often-attendant PTSD). Take time, be gentle, and do what you can to be trustworthy.But please, please dont put pressure on her.', 'Ive had prolonged and excruciating problems with compliance. Sometimes I quit with some vague excuse, and other times I just... quit, no reason.One thing that helps me is to keep my meds in someplace unavoidable - in particular, I literally stack my bottles on top of my wallet and car keys. If I want to go anywhere or do anything, I have to plow through a pile of meds to do it.Ive come close to doing the chart and stickers thing many times, because I too will occasionally just forget, or make up excuses, or whatever else. Even a single missed dose means an unavoidable episode for me, so I always know when it happens - but not always immediately, which is annoying.So yeah... not sad at all. I completely understand.', 'I know the feeling.I just got back on my own medication after a two month lapse, and its hardly the first time in the past several years. All I can say is: dont try it. You will certainly be no better for it, and almost without question will go through a tremendous hell before realizing that youre better off with the treatment.That said, it may well be worth experimenting with different medications. Depakote gave me effects similar to what you describe (severe absent-mindedness, inability to focus, loss of short-term memory, etc.) and coming off it was the best thing I ever did medication-wise. And Reflex, Abnormal thought patterns can be a sign of chemically-prompted Hypomania or Mania Leukemia, Myelocytic, Acute, which is not uncommon when taking a Drug abuse dose of antidepressants compared to mood stabilizers.Im not nearly enough of an expert to dare suggesting any tweaks to your medication, but definitely talk this over with your doctor(s) and see what they think. There are tens of millions of combinations of medication out there, and chances are you can find one that works for you if you can stomach a little experimentation.Best of luck!', 'Bollocks. Whiskey helps everything ;-)I dont Hyperactive behavior the word "from." It implies a historical connection I never have had. So well say Im rather international, and I currently live on the west coast.', 'There is so much of me reflected in this that its kind of scary.I dont know what to say, mainly because Im stuck in the bottom of a very similarly black pit myself, and Im also looking for a lot of the same things.So have an internet hug instead. Its the best I can do. I hope it counts for something.', 'I dealt with a lot of Anger when I was first diagnosed. It just seemed so _unfair_ that I would get smacked with this while other people got by just fine. Even now, I still have some lingering bitterness that surfaces in the rougher times; Ill often (privately) mock people for their silly, petty, carefree lives who whine about first world problems and other nonsensical shit Hyperactive behavior that. I think what gets me the most is people who think they can understand without having gone through something Hyperactive behavior this firsthand; I have a thinly veiled but hatefully deep well of scorn and spite for those people.Sometimes I feel Hyperactive behavior the only people who I can talk to about this are in anonymous groups Hyperactive behavior this subreddit; even most of the doctors Ive had dont really pay enough attention to _me_ as an individual to merit being told all the little nuances of what Im dealing with. The broad strokes will suffice, thank you very much, and Ill tell you the symptoms so we can keep the prescriptions flowing, but frankly Ive only ever had one doctor I respected enough to be honest with about much.I cant understate the benefits of having that kind of support though. Someone who genuinely gets involved from a position of being _able_ to help will make a tremendous difference. One of my personal warning signs of a _bad_ doctor is someone who plays the pigeonhole game: oh, you have X, Y, and Z combination of symptoms, well throw A, B, and C drugs at it and never deviate. Doctors who are afraid of experimenting and helping you discover an effective treatment regimen are worthless. You deserve someone who will stick with you and figure out how to truly improve your quality of life, not just stuff you full of pills and tell you that "hey, at least youre a _little bit_ better, right?"I was on Depakote for a long time and it totally killed my brain. I literally felt Hyperactive behavior I had the mental capacity of a child while I was on it. I couldnt think straight, couldnt speak clearly, and moved slowly and awkwardly. My doctor at that time insisted that I was fine and that I was just experiencing "normalcy" after years of Hypomania and mixed episodes. Eventually, after doing my own research on the medication, it became pretty obvious that he was full of shit and I fired him. One of the best decisions Ive ever made.Heres something Ive found that a lot of doctors are Social fear to tell you: despite the warnings about SSRI/SNRI antidepressants and triggering Mania Leukemia, Myelocytic, Acute, it _is_ possible to take them safely _in combination with other medications to manage the mania_. Ive done various permutations of Lexapro, Wellbutrin, Abilify, and Seroquel (SSRI, SNRI, and atypical antipsychotics, respectively) and they work pretty well. Now, thats not to say that the risk isnt real, and thats not to say it will work for everyone - but you have the right to find out for yourself, because frankly nobody can predict how youll respond to the medications.And honestly, as my favorite doctor of the past once put it, its far easier to bring someone down out of a mild Psychiatric symptom/Manic swing than to convince them to keep trying when theyre fully Depressed mood. His philosophy was to err on the side of making me feel better, and then tone things down and/or increase the controls from the other medications as necessary. For the last couple of years Ive been small doses of Lexapro and Wellbutrin daily, with varying doses of Abilify to respond to excessively Manic mood changes, and occasional Seroquel as a sort of "emergency response" to shut things down if they ever get out of control. It works pretty darn well, but I fired three different doctors before finding one who was even willing to propose such a cocktail, let alone stick with me long enough to find a mixture that worked.As to the big question... Ive made it this far out of pure rotten stubbornness. I figure it this way: someday or later, this goddamn disease might kill me. Most of the time I secretly suspect that when I die itll be self-inflicted. But every day, I tell myself this: it may get me eventually, and maybe thats inevitable. *But not today.*Not. Fucking. Today.And wouldnt you know it, 15 years on and Im still here. Maybe not the best outlook ever, but hey, it obviously worked.', 'Im not a professional, so take this with appropriate amounts of salt - but it definitely sounds Hyperactive behavior Hypomania to me. Im not deeply familiar with the symptoms of hyperactivity, so they may overlap substantially for all I know, but if I had to guess Id say you fall into the classic Type II category with rapid cycling.I have similar experiences with extremely short but Abnormal dreams episodes (although Im type I and go full Manic). Its frustrating because most of the medication out there seems targeted at long-term maintenance and finding something that can even out the hour-by-hour roller-coaster is tough.As for feeling blunted, I had very similar experiences with Depakote, and Ive heard that lamotrigine has that effect on a fair number of people. However, that said, a lot of medication has nasty side effects for the first few weeks of adjustment in my experience, and gradually gets better. I agree that you should give it some time; if you dont notice things returning to more or less normal in a few months, definitely talk to your doctor about changing up the regimen.Since your diagnosis is fairly recent, Ill just throw this out there: a lot of people find that it takes a _long_ time and many different combinations/levels of medication to find something that works well. Its also not uncommon to have to tweak things periodically even after you land on a good cocktail. So be prepared for the long haul and keep with it. Recording your reactions and moods with different medications can be immensely helpful; if youre Hyperactive behavior me, with memory falling apart rapidly from the combination of episodes and chemicals, having a written record can help a lot in figuring out what works and what doesnt.Its a long and complicated journey but its well worth taking, because you _can_ find a good balance between being yourself and not being overly symptomatic. Best of luck.', 'All familiar experiences... I really dont have much to say except good on you for finding an outlet, and for fighting to improve your life.', 'Also a possibility; Ive had some self-image issues in the past (complicated by the Bipolar Disorder stuff, obviously) and havent totally worked through all of that, so it could well be a factor.', 'Wanted to be. Got as far as filling out a few application forms and decided I couldnt lie about my psych profile. One of my best friends did a few tours in the Corps, and probably understands Hyperactive behavior nobody else I know what its Hyperactive behavior to live with a mortally wounded sense of humanity.Funny enough, I cant even blame combat experience for my situation. Im just fucked up in general. Maybe its a terrible thing to say, but I almost env

Attempt

I didnt graduate from Drug abuse school, in fact I dropped out halfway through my senior year. I was a year behind and couldnt stomach the thought of another year and being in the same grade as my younger brother and sister (twins). I also have ADHD, Anxiety problems, depression, the usual cocktail... Generally people Hyperactive behavior us are of higher than average intelligence, however the "system", specifically schools set us up for failure. \r\rIm 30 years old now and even though that was a very difficult, embarrassing time for me, college was different. I went to a community college, got my GED and went on to a 4 year school eventually. Now Im in a career I love, I started making six figures at 23 years old and my pay grade is equivalent to a full colonel in the US Military - (GS-13). I realize that doesnt Irritable Mood much to you unless your parents or a family member is a government employee, but for a kid that failed and dropped out of Drug abuse school to rise to the level Im at and achieve the things Ive achieved is a major, major victory.\r\rI know things seem hopeless, I have been in your shoes. I also know this will sound clich\xc3\xa9, but it gets better! College is easier for us ADHD folks, we can choose classes and a major(s) that interest us, and you know as well as I do, when were interested in something, focusing becomes very easy. The problem is Hyperactive behavior focus then, haha. Getting our attention on other things becomes problematic. \r\rDo whatever you have to do to make it through this year, if you can work out a plan to graduate, things will be easier. If not, a GED will get you into many state schools and all 2 year schools, from which you can transfer to a 4 year college/university. Find a major you LOVE, pour yourself into it and you will succeed. Try and ignore the "haters", including family, they dont understand, they CANT understand! Your brain and brain chemistry is fundamentally different from theirs in form and function. \r\rIf you give up, they win. If you beat the odds, swallow your pride, take your lumps and succeed despite the odds and what anyone says, you win. We all win. Hang in there, I Irritable Mood it when I say say, it gets better!!!

Ideation

Your dad loves you. Call him and tell him youre having a hard time and need some help. If my son did this, I wouldnt feel the slightest bit of disappointment, Id be on that shit Hyperactive behavior a ninja paratrooper and wed fix that shit. You need him, but he needs you too.', 'I think so, yes.', 'Whatever you do, get the fuck out of that school. Its killing your soul and that is a wound that is tough to heal. I went to religious school my whole life, was basically "indoctrinated" Told how to think, what to believe, when to sit, stand, pray. I could go on and on. This is the time on your life for you to figure out who you are, not who someone else wants you to be. Tell your parents you love and respect them, but you need to do what is right for you. Try telling them your gay first to soften the blow, then say "just kidding, Im not religious"Let us know how it goes', 'Dude, I do the same thing. It makes reading comprehension much easier. Im in my late 30s, so there was no ADHD, OCD diagnoses when I was a kid. It was you were bad, a spaz, too much sugar, etc. Its just a part of what makes me up, but I dont let it run my life.', 'Huzzah!', 'I think the book would have a different use for you. When you read it, it will help you understand the human dynamic. How people Hyperactive behavior to be spoken to, what tools you can use to change how you are perceived. Dont look at it as a video game strategy guide that will tell you exactly what to do, its more Hyperactive behavior a users manual.

Supportive

No.', 'I dont trust anyone sadly.', 'If anything you were brave enough to try to reach out for help, Fuck him he can go to hell for all I care hes the fucking pussy.', 'Elementary.', 'I kinda think scars are pretty badass, youll never know someone until youve walked a mile in their shoes.', 'She was not my girlfriend, she made my life a living hell all because I am in her assigned group for the school year.

Supportive

Even though I survived my attempt it still pains my dad to look at me sometimes. He feels Hyperactive behavior he failed as a father for letting me get to that point. So I have instead devoted my time to making it up to everyone and proving that it was never their fault and that I care for them. Every time I look at my scar I renew my promise to be better, for my friends and family.', 'My dad was a police officer for 14 years. He witnessed two suicides of guys he met about 2 minutes before they pulled the trigger. My friends always call my dad the most badass person they ever met and they dont know that 11 years later he still wakes up almost every night because he sees them occur in his dreams over and over again. It would be even worse for your family. There would bend "getting over it" for them. The reason you cant just do it is because your heart is telling you that you deserve to live and find a better solution than suicied. Being myself a Suicide survivor I can attest that I felt so much better when I looked and found that I wasnt just "wanted", but was "needed". And you are needed too. I can say with 100% certainty that somewhere there is a person whose life will cease to ever be happy or meaningful if you are gone. There is soo much good and greatness that you are capable of if you just look for it.', 'you should go outside and look at the stars. every star is someone somewhere we would love to meet you and talk to you and love you. you just havnt met them yet. these people would love to give you their 100%. and somewhere out there they are praying that you end up meeting them. you just need to be prepared to look long distances to find them. and remember, there are always more stars than meets the eye.', 'First off, format is non-existent on reddit. Second, I can actually say I understand the young age Mental Depression you had. I suffered from it too. Sitting there just hating myself and wondering why because I didnt even have a reason. Then getting so pissed that I didnt and becoming more Depressed mood. But I have never faced a delimna of not being satisfied with my gender I can say there are parts of me that I can never be happy with or ever want. It sucks being stuck in that situation, having to pick between what is allowed and what you want. Another thing you must realize is that we as humans were made to never fully be happy with ourselves. We are constant self demotivaters. And to be honest while I can say I couldnt personally entertain the the thought of getting a sex change, I find absolutely nothing disgusting about it.And I can tell you right now, YOUR PARENTS WILL ALWAYS PICK YOU OVER ANYBODY ELSE. Even their own parents. If not then they are terrible parents. you are the most important thing in their lives. But a way I would suggest telling them is by getting them alone and telling them one at a time. If you can convince one of them that this is what you really want then you can get their support in telling the other. Divide and conquer as the British always put it.And as for you ending it, there is not a worse decision to be made. Can you imagine how everyone would feel? There are people who only glance at you whenever you walk by who would feel terrible because they feel Hyperactive behavior should have stopped and talked to you. And they probably should. But not everything works the way it should. We just need to know that it isnt our fault. I tried distracting myself with video games for a while too. And books and all manner of entertainment. But what you have to do is just go out and start talking. And find somebody who likes to listen. You may find somebody who you have never seen or heard of before and realize that they are all it takes to make you happy. I found someone who was the only person who could make me completely forget all the bad things that I have done. And you know what? We later ended up not even working our relationship out. It soured and ended rather badly. But you know that kind of excites me, because that means there is someone who fits me even better than her out there waiting to meet me. There is always someone who will be perfect for you. Who will love and cherish you the way you are or want to be. They just dont want to find out that you committed Suicide. They want to know that you are searching for them, waiting for them.Now coming out will Chest Pain your family. But it will make it stronger over time too. It will prove to all of your family that they know they can trust each other and you will all love each other more. But if you kill yourself now, they will never be able to heal. The body can recover from a cut, but not the loss of a limb. You are a very important and desperately needed limb. Now you have to eat and Hypersomnia and be strong. It hurts to wait. But I found out that the wait is well worth it. Now I cant tell you how to block out those feelings of Mental Depression and loneliness. Everyone suffers and heals differently. But I would suggest hanging around friends and trying to find new friends, even if they live nowhere near you. But the more you talk to them, the more you may realize that your friends are as dependent upon your safety and well being as they are on oxygen. There is no substitute for "you".', 'It wont be a relief for others. It will be a nightmare. A nightmare that will follow a large number of them around for the rest of their lives.I found out long ago that nothing is inevitable. I stabbed myself in the heart just over a year ago, and am still alive today. I still dont know how I lived through it but I realized that killing myself would make everything worse. You dont have to believe in god or Mohamed or anything, but you do have a purpose for existing. Neither god, nor Mohamed nor Mother Nature, ever makes a mistake. There are reasons for everything. And those reasons want you to keep living.And the Ache does go away. It may take a while, maybe decades, but it will go away. And when it is gone it is the sweetest thing you can ever imagine. But that doesnt come 100% naturally, it needs your help and effort. Just hang in there and you will one day see what I mean. Peace, hope and love. Dont give up.', 'Agree, the more people that can be there for her the better. Maybe keep it to a number that she can definitely feel close to all of them. But there should be multiple to give her support.', 'both you and your sister should write letters/lists about how kind and how important of a person he is to you. you also need to make sure your sister does not beat herself up over this. she should resolve to be more visibly Disturbance in attention to him so he knows he is loved. but she cannot put all the blame on herself. being a registered Mental Depression i can account that we usually hide our Mental Depression and then randomly get upset and more Depressed mood when others dont see it. but the best thing for her to do is to hug him as tight as possible when she sees him again. we may hate it at first but us Depressed mood really being held in the long run. personally i have never liked being stroked while being hugged. it made me feel Hyperactive behavior an animal or an object rather than a human. but when somone held me so tight and close Hyperactive behavior they could never bear to let me go again, that made me feel much be more alive and wanted.', 'Killing yourself does not get rid of the Ache. It is the worst right at the end and thats what it stays at if you die. The worst torment imaginable of having less than no hope. In your last second you get hit with the knowledge that you committed the ultimate failure. I can guarantee you that ending it for yourself will only bring Ache. No happiness. No relief. No sanction. Just so much more Ache. And the internal shame that follows it.', 'Life can just be stressful cant it? What you should try is journaling. But this journal is a "purely positive" journal. Write in it every day, sometimes more. And what you should write about are all the good things that happened or existed that day. For example, you could start by writing about how loving and caring your family is. Then talk about how nice the weather is and how a random person smiled at you nicely for no reason other than to just smile. You will find that there is so much that can cheer you up by continually looking on the bright side.Also remember that all the responsibilities you have come with somebody depending on you, and while they may not be able to show it, they are extremely grateful to have somebody as awesome as you in there lives to help them along. We all have our struggles, but some of us do get tasked harder. And thats because those that do are stronger and more enduring than a normal person. You are a great contribution to those around you, please dont ever forget that.Now as for the lorazepam, I personally have never trusted man made pills to fully fix what we were given by nature. What you have to do is try to find Hypothermia, natural solutions, Hyperactive behavior more exercise or righter light bulbs (which are actually very helpful). And it is more than ok to ask for a little break from everyone every now and then. But keep in mind that there is no perfect solution and there will always be low times. But we prove our worth by showing how far we can climb out of the "low" spots.Happy New Years. Persevere', 'as proof of \xc2\xa8flaws\xc2\xa8 being agood thing, did you know humans became hairless as a result of uncleanliness. that led to the developement of clothes and helped us better bond into cultures. Also humans brains developed as a result of the greed flaw. we were ettracted to fatty foods and sugars that helped form our brain matter and nerves. we as humans are supposed to be flawed. these flaws are what helps us be individuals and not brainless drones. you have so much to give to all the world that only YOU can give because of your specific flaws. so much that they are a gift.', 'Left and came back to this page 30 times and never saw it till you pointed it out. Thats how insignificant typos are. If it would make you feel better, listen to the problems of those who listen to yours. And try to help them figure theirs out. You dont have to have amazing solutions, they will feel so much better just from knowing that your listening. They will appreciate you so much more. You are a vital part of EVERYTHING around you. Keep on trying. And enjoy having the new year. Because it certainly enjoys you.', 'The answer is not to kill yourself. The answer is to find those things, those people in life that make you feel good.(not drugs). You have to deal Hyperactive behavior the rest of us do, endure. It will be depressing at some points. Even a majority of the time. But you have to keep trying. Because there will be a time when you no longer feel Hyperactive behavior this. When all there is, is happiness. Happiness so good it will have been well worth the effort. Happiness that feels too good to be real, and then you realize that it is. Peace, love and hope my friend. Dont give up.', 'have a "faith night". on that night you get your friends together and you show your faith in them by truthfully answering any and all questions they ask.i did it and there was one question i was one question i was Anxiety they were going to ask. when they were done after a million questions, i asked why they didnt ask that one. they replied that the answered didnt matter to them. they still loved me.what you really need to do is show your friends and family that you love them through your actions. by doing that youll see how much they actually NEED you. you are worth more than a note and a bathtub. dont sell yourself short.

Attempt

It sounds Hyperactive behavior we have similar experiences and personalitiy types. Ive done a lot of self reflecting. A lot a lot. My philosophy, perspective, and personality have all improved by leaps and bounds since the break up. The most profound moment was a month in when I realized and sympathized with why she chose to leave me. Like you said, I was a Depressed mood boyfriend in certain ways. I always did the best that I could, but over the years I became complacent and my insecurity and sadness made me selfish. I really Chest Pain her. I realized that I broke her heart long before she broke mine.The odds of us having a relationship again are slim to none. She lives 3 hours away from me and is top in her class at one of the most prestigious universities in the world. Im a Drug abuse school drop out and deliver pizzas. Shes in a serious relationship with a girl and has moved on.Ill reply to everything as long as there are things to reply to. I dont know what I will do today. or tomorrow if there is a tomorrow. Answers:1. She may agree to speak with me, but really, all a conversation Hyperactive behavior that will do is cause her anxiety, flashbacks and pain. It would distance her from me even more. Our last communication was 4 months ago (today, actually). I wrote her a long letter validating her decision after I fully embraced why she needed to do what she did. But she firmly stands by her decision. I wish I could talk to her about this. I wish it would Irritable Mood something.2. Not a lot. I skipped school a lot in Drug abuse school and just sat alone in my room messing around on the internet. She saw something in me that no one else had ever tried to see, and she made an effort to get to know me. Without her, I would have killed myself years ago.3. Ive always wanted to travel and see the world. Ive always wanted to pursue acedemia at a university. I always wanted to inspire others...to make a positive impact.', 'Thanks for responding. I wish I could let you peak into my head so you could understand. I have no Phobia, Social skills. I have no ability to fall in love. Im alone and doomed to be alone. She was my first major relationship, true, but it was one that I know cannot be matched. I just cannot keep going on with out her. I love her so much and Im just a bad memory for her.The longer I live, the more bad memories pile up and intensify. I need to get away from them. I need to escape. ', 'hey.im not most people. the poets and philosophers, all those who pondered death and love and loss of love...theyre not me. for the longest time I drew strength from such things, now I see that this is something that I cant overcome. I cannot replicate the healing process others seem to grasp so easily.Im trapped in my memories. All I can do is think of her. I often catch myself smiling as I remember a fond memory...then I break into tears. I cant do this.

Ideation

Wow. That is truly terrible. You make it sound as though its her that really has the issues. Im starting to think you were just unlucky meeting your ex and youre realizing shes actually Megacolon, Toxic human being. I should be careful saying things Hyperactive behavior that, but yours is the only perspective I have to go by. Please dont be offended by this, but her leaving you was probably the best thing for you. The big thing is how to stay a part of your girls lives. Having been a kid once, I can tell you I started thinking for myself around my mid teens. I think most kids start to realize not everything their parents say is actually true. Then it begins. You start wondering "How much of it was true". You start thinking back on all the things they said. Ice cubes dont float because theyre cold and want to be closer to the sun. Some things were right, but enough wasnt that I went out of my way to form my own conclusions. I feel its bound to happen for them. For now, even if they are supervised, be there anyway. Eventually theyll get Nausea of maw hanging over them telling them what to say. Someday, they might even ask you why you made their mom Crying Reflex, Abnormal. Theyll wonder what was really going on, and theyll reform an old opinion of their dad.I cant offer you any parenting advice beyond that. Im not a father and things arent looking favorable in that department for me. But I am the child of parents. Ive realized being a parent is such an incredibly bumpy road. What to do right. What to say when. All parents will make mistakes. Probably lots and lots of them, but at the end of the day, making mistakes or making successes isnt your job as a parent. Your job is to be supportive and love your children unconditionally. Theyll forgive you for your mistakes, but theyll love you for always being there whenever they need you.Try to always have some way for them to be in contact with you. Weather the storm of supervised visits for now. Even if its just emailing back and forth, its something. They sound too young right now for things Hyperactive behavior that, but the day will come faster than you think.', 'Oh.. I see. Your wife is vilifying you in the eyes of her children. An incredibly rotten thing to do to the father of your children. Hate this because I told you to hate this! I dont know you guys so I dont know if its a justifiable course of action on her part... but I know its Depressed mood.I think you both might be selling your daughters short if you think they wont bother to form their own opinions in do time. Isnt there some legal course of action you can take where the court forbids a parent from moving across the country? I think you have a strong case since you can provide a much more stable atmosphere to raise kids in. Dont count yourself out of the parenting race just yet. Youre not done being a father just because of a divorce. Youll always be a father for as long as your girls live. Theyll need you less and less if they had good parents, but for most people, parents are Hyperactive behavior anchors to their kids. Losing a parent is Hyperactive behavior being a tight rope performing and losing your security net. Theyre only little girls still. Personally, I would live a life that contradicts all the negativity my vengeful ex says. Live by action of good virtue. If she tells them the sky is green and they see in fact that it is not green at all... Its Hyperactive behavior in a way shes giving you all you need to prove you are a good man and a good father. Like in involuntary set up. I think you owe it to yourself and and girls to prove everyone wrong. If you cant keep them from moving to Florida, people are much more connected over long distances now-a-days. You can chat online face to face or play games with a headset and mic together. You can insure you will always be available day to day for them and maybe still have some fun together in the process. I think youre in a better position to turn things around then you realize. Thats emotions for you. At first they overpower everything else. Then rational reasoning and logic pummel it into submission. Its just a matter of waiting for that Anger truck to crest that dune and crush those cars. I hope you rock the heck out of 2014. 13 was an unlucky number. ', 'Its hard not to see things Hyperactive behavior that though. Its the most simplest way try to trivialize someones problems by pointing out others have it worse or people with the same problem overcoming it. I wish I could say I was better than that, but Im guilty of it as well. I read posts here written by sad people, but they say they have this or that and actually seem to be doing quite well.. aside from their sadness. Its something Ive been on both ends of though. Perhaps as a benefit of dealing with it personally, Im far more understanding and compassionate about other peoples issues. Two people can have the same problem but one can solve it and the other can not. How can the problem be worse if its the same? Its almost Hyperactive behavior theyre not problems so much as mental barriers that are thinner for some and thicker for others. Some can walk through it Hyperactive behavior its tissue paper or even air, and others can hammer at it for years and year. Even indefinitely.I would mirror what the others have said, but they said it better than I could. If your normal friends wont listen, there are people online that will.', 'Im not sure how to say this without it coming across as negative but Ill say it anyway, she comes across as selfish and immature. Even playing games with you. She isnt being understanding or compassionate about your feelings or problems. She just compounds them and makes it worse, even preying on it. Seems Hyperactive behavior you even realize that. Shes shrugging you off and dismissing your feelings and prioritizing her own. I dont know you but she probably does. She probably thinks you wont do anything to jeopardize the relationship.Youve a far greater tolerance threshold than me. I obviously dont have the benefit of not being in that position, but being a compliment dispenser and ego booster to someone Hyperactive behavior that would wear thin real quick. Then again, she could be some sort of genius and is willingly giving you valid reasons to get over her so its easier for you. That would be impressive actually. Anyway, I Forgetfulness the name of the movie, but there was a line Michael Cain said that really hit me. Being an Respiratory Distress Syndrome, Adult isnt about doing the things you want do, its about doing the things you dont want to do. Unless she turns out to be a manipulative genius, its clear youre the only Respiratory Distress Syndrome, Adult in this scenario. Im at a bit of a loss to be honest. I find it wasteful to toss away people I have a long history with. Putting in all that work and effort for nothing. Investment of time with zero returns. Sure sometimes its for the best, but other times I dont want to lose it. If she really wants to be your best friend and isnt just saying it to placate you, she needs to start taking you much more seriously. Best friends dont generally blow you off so easily. Maybe her definition of the term is looser than mine.I hope you come out alright from this. If you have to walk through the living room while she watches tv to pack boxes or a suitcase/bags into your car for her to get the message. Actions speak louder than words. Might make her start taking you more seriously. Good luck. This is one of those really crappy ugly life hurdles not everyone is fortunate enough to get to tackle. When you do triumph over this one though, the others might be a cake walk. ', 'How did you end up in such an isolated location? You make it sound Hyperactive behavior your in one of those old 1930s scientific huts they set up in the arctic to study ice or blistering cold wind. You did say up here. Sounds Hyperactive behavior at one point you were not so isolated? A new job in a new city?I cant agree that youre a fuck up if you have you own place (although isolated and surrounded by ice and snow) and also net access. Seems Hyperactive behavior youve done some things right. I wish I could never celebrate another birthday personally. If you have no reference in time to mark against yourself, or you dont have birthdays, could you live younger and longer if you arent any older? Science should find out and just prove birthdays are bad for you once and for all so I can have an easier time getting out of them. If you didnt know/forgotten your birthday and someone asked you how old you were, youd say I dunno. Its up to your mind to be however old you think you might be. But if you know beyond any doubt your 35 for example. Youll try and force yourself to be 35. Its tough to talk about life. Everyone has their own thoughts on it. Philosophy I guess is the word. Recently, and Ive thought about this topic for over 2 decades, I have to ask myself why we have to label points on everything. If grass grows out in a meadow where nothing will ever eat it, its still grass. It exists. Not everything has to be overly analyzed and given purpose and point and significance. Like interpreting dreams. Its a waste of everyones time. That said, I think its different individually. Some people give themselves a point to existing and try to better society. Invent computers and tablets and airplanes. Other people will type on a computer, maybe use a tablet, and perhaps fly on an airplane some day. Some people will make a difference in the majorities mind, others will sit at home all day and get Drug abuse. The point is points are trivial. They matter only as much as they matter on an individual basis. Its devoting importance to something that questionably doesnt need none. Like human sacrificing atop Drug abuse temples to make the sun rise or the crops grow. Thats why this is one of those topics that weve been blabbering on through out human history. Its obvious if no conclusion has been made by now, there is no right answer to life. You could simply simplify everything and just try to be happy. Easier on paper, not always in practice. I dont have to invent some world ending bomb, space travel super engines, whatever. Just be happy in the pursuit of happiness. Some days youll break even between sad and happy. Most moments might be sad. But if Zombieland teaches anything, its the small things that matter. The small things that make all the difference.', 'Hi. Please dont take my opinion as written law from upon Drug abuse. Its just my humble opinion on a few of the things youve said. They are what I personally believe.1. Intelligence is a curse. If you couldnt think things Hyperactive behavior this up, wouldnt you be happy? Im sure youve heard the old saying "Ignorance is bliss"? I firmly believe it to be truth. The less you know about how everything works, the more joy youll get out of life. Just as a few examples-Chocolate! MMm... contains feces and bug parts-the beach! Yay! Mostly poop death and bacteriaSome of the happiest people on Earth live in the poorest places. If youre poor, you dont receive a good education, yet their among the happiest people on Earth? There is nothing wrong in knowing what you want to know. If people put you down for not knowing everything, theyre not good people.I cant comment much on your appearance... but I can say that most everyone is their biggest critic. Actually, I can say with almost complete faith that youre not ugly. It doesnt matter what you think you look Hyperactive behavior but what others think you look Hyperactive behavior. There are 7,000,000,000 people walking this Earth. Trust me, the odds that several hundred millions of people think you look damn good are quite Drug abuse. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.As far as girls go... girls are weird man. Since theyre not all the same, theyre tough to really pin down. I can say that if a woman loves you, its usually for the person you are inside that theyre attracted to, not so much outside Hyperactive behavior it is for quite a bit of guys. At least the women you should be interested seem to follow that train of thought. If they Hyperactive behavior you for your personality, suddenly your the most attractive guy on the dance floor.Of course you can change your face without surgery, but you can change your body. Not overnight, but it benefits you in a number of ways.-The ladies love strong arms. There was a video on youtube where they hid a tiny camera on a Genital Diseases, Male model and had him approach random women and they would track the movement of their eyes to determine the first thing they notice about a man. Arms was number 1. -Google "Runners High". it exists. Its a thing. Regular exercise makes you feel better over all. Hell... I absolutely hate working out, but it helps me stay in a better frame of mind then if I dont. So please.... dont beat yourself up over these things. Take inventory of how you are now. You have work. You have income. You probably have a car to get to work? You voluntarily read scientific articles? You have a desire to improve yourself? My friend... you are far from the piece of shit that you think you are. Id honestly say your ahead of the game. \xe2\x80\x9cI dont know what my IQ is. People who gloat about their IQs are losers\xe2\x80\x9d\xe2\x80\x95 Stephen Hawking ', 'Its more "you could have everything to live for". Some people are aggravatingly lucky in life and dont have to work for their dreams to fall in their lap. Others have to bust their ass and then some and may never find it. When someone says life is unfair... thats what theyre talking about. So youre right. Telling you you have everything to live for probably wont make a difference if youre not willing to find reasons to live for.Lately, Ive been on the fence as to whether being alone is actually a bad thing. Maybe Ive simply been alone so long that its become my Hypothermia, natural state of being and Im just accepting that reality. I can tell you though that the only thing in all the world I want is that perfect someone to grow old with. Its Hyperactive behavior the one thing thats forbidden to me. Like Im chained up and its just out of reach. There it sits glowing a golden shine. I wish I could tell you how exactly I deal with it, but the main thing is that I simply dont give a fuck anymore. Im currently in no position to do jack squat about it and Im so pessimistic that Ill ever find it even if I can. So... bleh. Whatever. Yes... it creeps up on me some days and makes things unpleasant. Its never been the thing that makes me Crying Reflex, Abnormal though.Depending on what kind of companionship youre looking for and whether or not you have a method of transportation, I think for you at least its a matter of finding a place to put yourself where there are lots of people. Christmas was the first time Id Ventricular Dysfunction, Left the house in almost a year because I live in the boonies and dont have a car. Anyway, if you have the means, then its about finding the ways right? All you gotta do now is put yourself around people, flex your biceps and wink a bit, hope for the best. Doesnt work out? Move Hyperactive behavior the suave nomad you may be to greener pastures and try there.I wish I could tell you where to go and be but I dont know, and I dont know what you would Hyperactive behavior. I do know however that there are groups doing things all over the damn place. The hard part is finding them. Theres moviephiles that see movies together and discuss it latter, theres book clubs, comedy troupes, new job, cooking classes, dance classes, etc, yada yada yada.In the meantime, work on improving yourself. Sculpt yourself into someone worth being with. You proooobably dont have to. Lots of people would love and accept you for who you are now, but its not entirely for them either. Standing yourself enough to be alone with yourself is something a lot of people never achieve. I feel Hyperactive behavior its something that should allow you to place yourself on a higher pedestal then people that cant. Like someone who has attained true independence. You dont >NEED!!< constant companionship with any random shmuck you dont even care about. Im doing a crap job explaining probably what I Irritable Mood so Ill stop there to avoid embarrassing myself further.', 'Im sorry. You were quite vague so I dont really know how to appropriately respond. What I can say is that 1-way love is not love. I can also say that women prefer men that have been in prior relationships. Its an attractive quality the majority of the time. My point is, you probably wouldnt be alone or unloved for very long. If youre wife is really going to move on, then you are certainly just as capable. Life is all together to short. Most good guys will always love the mother of their children. My point is, if you love her then you should want for her to be happy. As the father of her children, she should want the same. Move on. Im sorry if thats too blunt or bordering on tough love but if your relationship isnt salvageable and one of you isnt interested in making it work and fixing the broken wagon wheel, theres really nothing else for you to do then is there?Im not going to disclose my life to you, but I will say this and I might get in trouble for it... if this was a lawless world, Id save you the trouble and assume your identity. Sorry if thats a bit callous. You have far far too much to just flush it down the crapper. Maybe if you never had a wife. Never had kids. Never attained financial stability and security. Never had a home. Never this and never that. But you do. You have all those things and you can have that 1 thing again. Maybe even better with someone willing to work on the relationship because you are worth it to them.Again, I apologize if I came across as insensitive. I understand this temp life change is getting you down. Its definitely a big one. But all I see is happiness in your future. Its difficult talking about this without upsetting someone or stepping over the line. I cant wrap my brain around why you want to die. You sound Hyperactive behavior a winning tiger blooded Adonis of society. Is it to spite or Chest Pain her for leaving you?You say youre too in love. You are choosing not to move on. Not to move on now. Is that what you would choose 1-2 years from now? Id say taking time to yourself and not moving on is the healthy thing to do. Id think something was wrong with you if you replaced your wife within a month. Taking time to collect yourself is normal and healthy. The hopeful in me does wish you could sit down with your wife and work it out. Does she know how much you love her? Do you tell her or show her with romantic feats? Have you guys considered relationship counseling? If she is willing to work then work man. If shes cheating on you then how could you love her so much still? Well anyway. Id wish you the best of luck, but I genuinely believe that if you dont kill yourself, you probably wont need my good wishes. I know the old other fish in the sea adage is Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder to hear, but you sir are a god darn marlin. Dont think of it as the end. Think of it as the beginning of something potentially better. Thats what it can be if you let it.I change my mind. I will wish you good luck. I dont care if you dont need it. Youll fall through the ringer of a broken heart. Itll be hard. But youll come out the other end stronger and better. Its the start of a new year. ', 'I have a friend that has told me similar stories. She would tell me that shed lock herself in her soon and avoid knives because she was afraid of Depressed mood herself and other people. Like an overwhelming sensation to go stab Abnormal behavior had washed over her. Shed sit trapped in her room for over a week sometimes. I never got that. It isnt something I personally ever experienced. Maybe its a female thing.I cant really tell from what you said what is the cause of your sadness."mfw my friends dont know shit about how much I want to kill myself"If you cant talk to your friends and comfort each other in hard times than maybe theyre not the quality of friends that deserve you."mfw I literally got told at my party by someone that they dont respect me because Im still a virgin."Fuck em. No not literally. Thats one Depressed mood close minded person. Look, I dont want to trivialize this for you but youre only 20. Not only that but youre not a guy. Society views virgin females with a much more forgiving eye than males. Trust me. Guys are outcast from the human species if theyre still virgins after 25. All because Depressed mood media and brain dead sheeples making mountains out of nothings.I would stop broadcasting it to everyone though. Its a personal thing and sadly because its a topic of fierce scrutiny, a secretive thing. The only person you should ever tell is the guy/girl youve been dating and becoming close with. If they have feelings for you, they wont care. That goes for 30, 40, 50+ year old virgins as well. The people that matter dont care."mfw someone was really Depressed mood at my party and every time I saw them I wanted to stab myself and scream because I wasnt allowed to show myself not having a good time because then people will just assume Im being a jealous bitch."Its surprising hearing about a Depressed mood person throwing parties. Im not gonna do the others. Im starting to feel Hyperactive behavior " max dose of anti depressants" could be the problem. Just Hyperactive behavior they recommend getting a 2nd opinion with your health issues, so to should they for mental health issues. I think its pretty clear these anti depressants arent working and could even be compounding the problem. I cant guarantee that they are, but it may be worth talking to your doc about it. Or a different doc altogether. Also, and I was apprehensive about typing this, it seems some how to me that youre maybe slowly realizing the things you thought were important in Drug abuse school are slowly revealing themselves to be the true petty bullshit things that they really were. The real world hits a lot of people Hyperactive behavior... well Hyperactive behavior the world came Drug withdrawal syndrome down on you. Seeking the attention and acceptance of crappy people. Putting on a fake mask for those around you. Not losing your virginity at 15. All crap. Im probably grasping at the few straws you gave me but, it seems Hyperactive behavior your just slowly coming to terms with that. Waving bye to an old life and not knowing much about forging a new one, but the old ways are familiar ways? pthpthtp... maybe Im just blowing hot air by this point. Anyway, I truly wish you the best. I hope you can find that unseen rope in the dark and pull yourself out of the stinky hole. One last thing! Males are easy. Im one I know. Dont just give it to any Irritable Mood that sees you as a challenge or a conquest because he found out your a virgin. Save revealing that to them till later dates. Find someone that loves you first. Not loves taking your virginity. Theres a difference. 1 is a person of quality. The other is a shit ball douchie-fruit that will brag about it to his bros and kick you to the curb when hes done with you. Dont be afraid to pm people here and strike up a convo. Probably not so much with me since as you might have guessed, we dont have a lot to relate to lol. Maybe Kate though. You guys could pwnt noobs in free internet games Hyperactive behavior TF2 or dota or whatever. Try to have a little fun day to day. It really helps. I hope things start looking brighter. ', 'Its odd you mention faith but talk about suicide. Im with you though. I think theres something to be said about a couple that goes the distance. Probably why Im not married myself. I havent read the Bible in a long long time, but I dont find its reasonable by dealing in such absolutes or offering a guide on how to handle a failing relationship. More of a grin and bear it no matter how sad and Depressed mood it makes both of you. Human beings are fickle. We can believe one thing today and another a month from now. We can think someone is perfect for us and realize latter theyre not. It is no ones fault, its in our nature. However, I do think its more than possible to find that person that will go the long haul with you. I Irritable Mood, you can see couples that have done it. Its a definite possibility and simple (lol) matter of finding it.If you do decide some day to be loved again, this experience will have taught you a great deal you could employ in your next. You can try to insure the next one is seriously in it to win it. To grow old with you and help you spoil your grand kids. Dont be in such a rush to put a ring on someone. That Beyonce song is a load of crap. You can get a better feel for things next time. See if her parents are still together. Kids with their original parents generally try to make a relationship work because thats what they grew up around. More so if even their grandparents are still together. It is what the know to do ingrained from birth. Anyway, I hope you decide to try again. You cant be a man of faith up until it stops suiting you. I would also have to mirror what the others have said of your children. I dont know what ages they are, but giving them money and them knowing how to invest it wisely are two separate things. My brothers girlfriend lost her mother to a traffic accident. She doesnt work. She wont ever work. She lives off a trust fund made from her mothers life insurance money. She hasnt grown into an Respiratory Distress Syndrome, Adult. Incredibly immature. She isnt progressing and growing as an individual because shes been exempted from having to deal with real life problems Hyperactive behavior dealing with Irritable Mood coworkers or not getting her way 100% of the time. Dont let her know this but, shes a terrible human being.I mentioned kids who grew up with their original parents are used to following in their footsteps.http://www.cnn.com/2010/HEALTH/04/21/suicide.children.hereditary/The loss of your life will leave significant ripples. It will have negative repercussions and inflict a deep wound. Its part of my inability to understand why you want to give up. You have way way too much now that I dont see how you could have the luxury of taking your life anymore. It would cause an incredible amount of pain.I understand not wanting to be around to see her happy. Ho boy. That would suck. Of course thats assuming she actually gets to be happy. Thats something thats kinda up in the air. If she isnt someone willing to make relationships work, shell have a far harder time with it then you will. Anyway, you dont have to die to never see someone again. Kids and trading custody stops when the youngest is over 18 right? Then you wont ever see her again with some luck because she isnt dropping the kids off anymore. She doesnt even have to get out of the car and see you. She could even make them walk from up the street. You can put further distance between each other as well. I Irritable Mood, Ive seen people at the grocery store a mile down the road that Ive never seen again ever. You dont have to go to such extremes as shutting your eyes and singing LALALALALACANTHEARULALALA!! to block someone out. Its much more easier than that. This is most assuredly a low spot in your life, but you have many potential Drug abuse spots to look forward to if you allow it. Im guessing your kids are still young. You seem to have gotten the short stick and ended up as the disciplinary parent lol? Your wife the fun one? Well, just as humans are fickle, so to especially are kids. They cant see that what you do for them is actually for their benefit until theyre old enough to reflect back on it and put the pieces together.', 'Its not so much about giving someone reasons as it is showing them that theyre reason for not arent as good as they think. Like you cant tell someone you know nothing about that friends and love is super awesome when they might be much more attuned to being lone wolfs that prefer to live in the forest and befriend loyal animals. Some people put career over family. Everyone is different. Thats what makes everything so hard. An answer isnt really an answer so much as a potential hinted suggestion. An upward inflectioned "maaaybeee diisss?"I tend to over simplify everything to make things as easy as I can. If someone is sad, the first thing they should do is go Sherlock on that shit and get to the bottom of it. Deduce the reason for being sad. Figuring out the cause is the most important part of pursuing a solution. I Hyperactive behavior to think most people that are sad can do this on their own. Usually the problem isnt as difficult to see as once they start looking. The big problem is when they cant.Depression has many causes. It can stem from so many variables. Maybe its your life situation. Maybe its a rocky relationship. Maybe its a hidden medical problem. Maybe its a genetic defect. Maybe its a chemical imbalance. Maybe its simply a vitamin D deficiency. Seeing problems in your life are far more visible than most the rest of these things and even professionals arent always interested in getting to the root of the cause. The first psychiatrist I talked to talked to me for 15 minutes and was already willing to prescribe me brain altering drugs in that short span of time. So, for a lot of people, the struggle really is finding someone genuinely interested in helping them. Not doping them up to ensure steady appointments to help pay off their summer home. If I made a list, it would look Hyperactive behavior this:1. Yourself2. Friends3. Family maybe. Personally I have closer relationships with friends4 Religious authority figure if you follow a particular faith.5. Therapist. Talk to a couple till you find one that hits your fancy. A therapist cant prescribe drugs usually. They mostly listen and provide feedback and everything said is confidential. Good ones are willing to work with you if you dont have insurance or its not covered by your insurance.6. Doctor. Get blood work done and a general check up. Maybe something internal is on the fritz7. Psychologist. Id only suggest them as a last desperate resort. Hopefully a good one that doesnt try to prescribe pills to you in the first 15 minutes. Find one that is more interested in finding the root of the problem then blanketing it or enuring job security.I dont discount the possibility that an individual can have solid well thought out valid reasons to not live. However, since there is so much a person can do to fix/work/improve their life that it makes your head spin... its incredibly incredibly rare. Even going into the extremes.This isnt for the Syncope of heart, and if medical abnormalities make you queasy, then I suggest you ignore this next sentence. Google Dede Koswara. Heres is a man I might say miiiiight have had good reasons if he ever even had any at some point, but once his story broke out, people the world over reached out and showed this man people are amazing. Its Hyperactive behavior he stood on the edge of an ocean and couldnt swim, then everyone voluntarily threw themselves into the water to form a bridge to help him get to the other side. Now he has aspirations to marry some day and see his grandchildren.It goes to show the lengths the better side of humanity will go to to help another. With the rapid advancement of medical science, I dont think its outside the realm of possibilities that Dede will some day be cured of his affliction. If this man can stay positive and hopeful...I think most the population naturally has a programmed desire to live and preserve life. Especially mammals. its a Hypothermia, natural instinct thats difficult to overcome. All the people that have attempted to here and either pulled themselves back or looked for any reason not to should be proof of that. Its a powerful force of nature in all of us. We wouldnt be here now as a species without it. I hit a deer 3 years ago coming home from Christmas at night going 77 mph. Totaled the car. Deer got up and actually made a run for the tree line. Almost made it. Would have made it if it could. In a way, were kinda Hyperactive behavior Terminators. "I can not self terminate." lol thats hilarious. Anyway, Im all done. Sorry for being so long winded. I hope some of it was insightful though for you. Have a better year this year. Good luck. :]', 'Hiya. A lot of what you said almost mirrors perfectly with myself. Hell, Im even the same age. Spooky.I have a real problem personally with leavi

Supportive

Every night I go to bed hoping and wishing so much that I just wont wake up in the morning, brain aneurism or something, and every time I wake up it hurts that I have to go through another day. Suicide is a Ache in the ass and just not existing would be nice. But unfortunately the world seldom works out Hyperactive behavior that and if you want something done right you have to do it yourself.If youre not willing to kill yourself I would suggest trying to get your life back on track. You dont want to work harder to get out of the rut and I dont blame you. Not one fucking bit. But what other choice do you have? People have been telling me to just take one day at a time. Maybe try that?', 'Im sorry this happened to you. Thats shitty. Im not going to tell you not to kill yourself, but I will let you know that HIV, although still a serious problem, is not the death sentence it used to be.If you take the time to look into it youll find people can live out pretty normal lives with it. And that there are people that will use protection with someone positive, or that there are other HIV positive people looking for love.Before you kill yourself you should at least report that guy to the police.and maybe look into going into foster care or a government halfway house etc. wouldnt hurt.', 'Ive been seriously thinking about making a noose myself for a few days now. I dont really have any advice. I just wanted you to know that youre not alone in your thoughts.', 'I dont know where you are, but in Canada you can walk into any hospital emergency room and get help for a psychiatrist. I did it just the other day.', 'Ive tried the knife to the heart one. Its not as painless as you think. If youre just trying to force it in your own body will stop you. And youd be surprised at how much you can bleed until you bleed out.I know how you feel though. I think theres many of us here that do.It looks Hyperactive behavior youre having gender identity issues as well. Try living Hyperactive behavior a girl for a while and see if it helps. Full dress, wig, makeup everything. People might treat you better.', 'I dont know what to say, Im kind of in the same boat. It seams Hyperactive behavior a very small boat doesnt it? Its probably not just you and me though. there are other people just as pathetic and worthless as us. So in a way were not alone as we think... Fuck. I suck at this. If youre going to kill yourself let me know, then maybe we die at the same time and it wont be as alone.', 'Funny, I made a similar post recently in r/SuicideWatch about envying those with cancer.I guess we have the same line of thought.', 'No. It would devastate him. And then when you die he will never know the truth probably driving him to Suicide as well.Talk to him about ALL the issues your having. If youve been together for 8 years he obviously loves you and will do whatever he can to help you through this.

Attempt

Im on my forth antidepressant and have tried all the talking therapies. I have a psychiatrist. It just all works for a little while then I stumble into a dark part of my mind that overtakes the rational part. What I want right now is to end it.I know, that the reality is I should look at my life and work out what I can fix and start there with small goals but Ive been off work a month and have got to the point I can barely summon the effort to feed myself. I had a med increase the other week. So far things are the same. I know I cant solve my problems over night but right now even taking small steps feels Hyperactive behavior climbing a mountain.', 'Kinda... I obviously dont know you but my guess is you can understand the actual moment your meant to talk to a doctor/support worker/etc.... Sometimes the words arent there. I always get Confusion and struggle to explain. You know what I mean? I need to go see my GP this week though, so probably expected to talk to them a bit.', 'I have the responsibility of not making everyone in my life Depressed mood to live for other than that not really. Im trying to remind myself recurrent Mental Depression kinda works this way and that it wont last. But sometimes I feel the facts that I know are crushed by what my Mental Depression "knows".I just wanted to rant a bit I guess and the internet is a pretty good place to do that. The ideas feel Hyperactive behavior they are circling me but Im pretty sure I have many issues with Suicide methods, not definite enough, too messy for the discovery, wasteful, damaging to others. So I sit here and think and feel sad about that. I think the hardest part is every Mental Depression episode I feel I lose a little of who I was before it and thats getting harder to accept.

Ideation

Dont think of life short term. I was in the Army and my life was measured in 4 year contracts, I never thought past that. It didnt work out, and suddenly I was a civilian again and life was HARD. I have a daughter I barely see, work minimum 40 hours a week and have class 3 days a week. Im making enough money to stay afloat. I just got tboned last week and my car got totaled. Ive been in jail, tried to kill myself handful of times, fallen into alcoholism, and fucked up A LOT. You know what brother? None of that holds me back from my future. Im 21, you got some years on me but the struggle is the same. I never saw combat man. I can only imagine what it was Hyperactive behavior. Prison will suck but its just a time to reevaluate things. Its a grown up wake up call brother, dont think of it as life ending. You always have choices man. Always. If you are ready to die you have absolutely nothing to lose. Live life to the fullest, because in your mind youre on borrowed time now. Thats how I feel man. I feel Hyperactive behavior Im lucky to even be here and I got on average 40 fucking years Ventricular Dysfunction, Left. Ive only lived a third of my life. I served the country. I went to jail. I have a kid. Ive been in an asylum. Ive seen everything I thought I could and then holy shit; it got even worse somehow. But it always gets better. Always. You will see that. Some of my best friends in the world are from the service AND from jail man. Theres literally good in so many things. You can get through this, even with hard time. That just means you will meet more people. Compared to the Army man, its not bad. Its not Levenworth thats what I always reminded myself. You arent alone. You always have someone man. Old platoon buddies. Old NCOs. Old mentors. New friends, old friends, everything. Life isnt over for you yet brother. Dont throw in the towel. I know youre stronger than that. You will make it through this man. You will. If you ever want to talk to me more man Im a PM away. You and I could Skype with some of my best friends from my platoon, all of our lives are fucking Abnormal behavior now. But we are still living. We both have friends who arent; and Im sure you dont want an afterlife beat down from them, at least not yet ;). ', 'Im 20, a vet (medical discharge woo), 2 years of college, 4 years of volunteering for the Red Cross, job history of holding the same job for more than 2 years, anddddd I dont even get callbacks bro. Good things are on the horizon for both of us, I have tried and failed many times to kill myself its a constant battle. This is not the end for you, but just a new beginning.There is nothing more precious or sacred then life my friend...dont let go of it yet. Not our time :). ', 'You opened for cage!?! Thats fucking awesome dude. Seriously, keep working on yourself. JUST yourself. Cut all contact off with girls and eventually, the girls will come to you. I was in your position two years ago when my fianc\xc3\xa9 Ventricular Dysfunction, Left me after mentally and physically abusing the shit out of me. Ive been single ever since them. I work out literally everyday. I either rollerblade or hit the gym or walk a mile or do anything man. I do that shit for ME. Not to get chicks to Hyperactive behavior me or think Im attractive, I do it because I know Im attractive and it makes me happy. When I was in HS, I tried to kill myself more times than I can count. I took so many Advil my liver is still fucked and I cant really drink or at least I shouldnt. I was so lonely, had never kissed a girl, couldnt even go and talk to a girl, and now Im so so so so SO much better. Just 5 years later and its been some of the craziest time of my life. Do everything you do for YOU. A common phrase among my friends is "youre my day 1 bro/nigga/etc." which is true man, I lived in some Depressed mood parts of Chicago and Philly and I fucked up and went to jail but Ive had people there from me from the very beginning man. I never let myself forget I only have ONE day ZERO bro. That bro is me. I will always be around, my friends could get shot or locked up and it would destroy me but you have to keep going. The only person who can make you the best is yourself, and everyone believes in you. My phone screen will always be something simple "You are going to want to give up. Dont." Good luck man if you need anything PM me', 'You signed a 6 year contract, right mate? That means youre...a reservist, right? Now Im thinking that if youre a reservist, you got Hyperactive behavior, 1-2 months Ventricular Dysfunction, Left of tech and then youre back home? Chilling with the buddies, your girl, doing all the shit you love to do. Then you MIGHT get deployed in the next 5 years of your contract, and sit around in kuwait/germany/japan/iran and do absolutely nothing (people that arent combat ops do fucking nothing when deployed just saying, nothing wrong with that im a god damn fueler and proud of it ;D)Seriously though. I want you to PM me. I am enlisted in the Army Reserves and before that I was in ROTC. The military life is NOT for everyone. You sound Hyperactive behavior you just got in and hated it. Tech school should be a lot more fun for you than BCT was. If you hate tech school this much, you might just not Hyperactive behavior the military. The military gives you PLENTY of resources for your LIFE nowadays...including getting out and getting help, ESPECIALLY for Suicide. Didnt they give you Suicide prevention classes??? Those assholes...Seriously though man. Im a PFC in the Army and life is...fine. Its not great. Its not WTFAMAZING. I dont have some weird thing about serving the country. Nah. I just Hyperactive behavior what I do. I Hyperactive behavior guns. I Hyperactive behavior cars. I Hyperactive behavior running. Im athletic. I Hyperactive behavior women. I Hyperactive behavior tattoos. I Hyperactive behavior swearing. I Hyperactive behavior jumping over shit. I Hyperactive behavior cadence. I Hyperactive behavior fighting. I Hyperactive behavior life-long friends. I Hyperactive behavior having a steady job. I Hyperactive behavior income I can rely on. I Hyperactive behavior being yelled at and motivated. I LOVE a challenge. Read that paragraph really carefully bro. Read that shit and find out if you Hyperactive behavior any of that (thats barely ANYTHING when you think about it). If you do, stick with it. Youre a reservist by the sounds of it, (standard reservist contract is 6 years on 2 years off I believe). You are at the end of the tunnel dude. Pick up a video game, start running even more than you already do...anything. Its tech school. You have your phone+facebook right? Get a webcam for you AND your girlfriend skype. skype ALL THE FUCKING TIME. Any chance you get. Skype. Maybe that will help you dude because if this chick supports you Hyperactive behavior you say, she wont let you jump out of a goddamn window. And neither will any of us here! You have plenty of help brother...reach out to anyone in the thread, especially me! Id love to talk to you...Ill even give you my number, we can text about the DUMBEST shit. Im Wakefulness the same time as you are!Military friends rock dude. They are there for life usually because you fucking bond under some of the hardest circumstances people can go through. Military life IS TOUGH! You will pull through it man! I think you can do it, I believe in you. Seriously. Please PM me. Peace brother. (I cant tell what branch youre in so..Hooah, Semper Fi etc. etc. ;D)', 'Hey brother, I was in the military. Id be happy to talk to you and try to find some resources for you - have you talked to JAG yet? ', 'Whats up brother. I was in the Army, I enlisted as a cadet with a Chap. He would be able to talk to you, Hyperactive behavior any Chaplain. Mental Health Services are real as hell man. Almost all of my senior NCOs with multiple deployments were there getting a cocktail of pills and talking to someone. You need to talk to someone bro, but youll get through this. The month after I enlisted, one of my sole reasons of enlisting was money for my Fianc\xc3\xa9 and I, and the month after I found out she cheated on me multiple times. It Chest Pain bro. I shipped off to BCT and saw lots of bad shit, came home and was completely alone. I went to my Chap and talked to him and pretty much told him straight up - Im and atheist, but I dont even know where to turn too. He listened, and offered advice, and never pushed me to any decision. I never told him I was so upset Id kill myself, because thats something I think hed have to tell your CO but dude...all your battles go through shit, Ive been through shit, youll go through shit...the military is such a huge part of our lives, its what we have for families bro. Rely on your battles, trust someone and youll be good man. Best of luck to you bro. I Irritable Mood it. ', 'OP I did something very similar to you with Advil, it seemed Hyperactive behavior the perfect choice at the time but I didnt die. I lived. It was the complete opposite of painless and easy too. Call 911 and get some help OP, everyone will be hear to listen when youre back. ', 'I really enjoyed reading this. Thank you for taking the time to write it or compile it. I believe the universe is...okay. I also believe in Buddhism, so I could identify with many of these concepts. If we are all eternal - why jump to the next starting gate so soon? If we are all one part of the same ocean (loved that quote on Enlightenment) then why not stay here? Especially if you are already at this point in life...understanding this stuff can make looking at the world harder because it seems Hyperactive behavior people are missing the big picture. People rarely help each other. We inflict wounds upon ourselves with our reckless greed, reckless violence...I still think things are okay. THIS life can hold so many wonders and marvels for everyone in it - have you truly seen it all? I ask you to go and truly experience something before doing this. Suicide may be a choice for everyone, but theres nothing stopping you from doing it tomorrow if you just try to LIVE today. I hope everything works out for you man. If you have any personal stuff going on you want to talk about, feel free to message me and Ill listen and give as much advice as I can.

Indicator

Haha, no its not that bad, just more subtle. Ive worked in a Genital Diseases, Male dominated workplace before an its not an obvious discrimination more Hyperactive behavior you know they talk about it when youre not there, think you need more help, not as capable, subtle sexist jokes or comments about women that never qualify harassment. Or you end up being desirable which can effect workplace dynamics. ', 'Its such a comfort to have someone else who gets it! It can be so frustrating when I try and talk about it with my friends or family who just say I need to focus on myself bla bla. I still Hyperactive behavior to think that there has to be love out there for people Hyperactive behavior us, because; hope and fairytales and all that jazz. ', 'Thank you so much, this is exactly why I cant stand the phrase! ', 'Half an hour of prime motivation, push for another ten after, then kaput', 'Well Ill say that you are worth the fight, I feel Hyperactive behavior I do understand this feeling, because knowing the answers to a problem doesnt always Irritable Mood you know how to or feel able to act out the solution. People who dont quite understand will try to help in the only way they know how and this is with those Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder simple answers. I wish they would just give big hugs and say nothing. I hated people for a long time too. ', 'True!', 'Whats btw?', 'Part of my my mental health problems is borderline personality traits which has diagnostic criteria specifically relating to Angina, Unstable relationships and Angina, Unstable sense of self - this is when not being treated though. But I guess thats why I do take the phrase more personally- coz if my illness relapses it does effect my interpersonal relationships but its the illness and not me. If that makes sense. ', 'For example Ill go "okay time to start this research in cane toads effecting biodiversity and summarise it into a presentable format to voice record, need graphs and maps too, okay lets go!" Ill go to the Uni library page an find a tonne of great peer reviewed articles (I also use wiki to work out what to search for) and then open a word document an start writing and then suddenly "what is that word i swear I used to know so I can make this sentence work, oh I need to write the actual data, ill have to check it across lot of articles, does this sound too much Hyperactive behavior Im plagiarising, where do I put the space, does this point go in a new paragraph, I used to be able to do this what the hell brain! ugh Im so Exhaustion from trying to put together this introduction I think Ill have a break and get more info later" then off to watch cats on YouTube or something mindless. ', 'I am saving this list. Thanks :) ', 'I really appreciate hearing the other side of the situation. It sounds Hyperactive behavior your ex wasnt getting any professional help and just giving you the full force of (borderline type of mental illness from the description) her inability to regulate her emotional states. I can understand how you have the view you do after what you have experienced. And you are right about needing to be ok on your own, sustain yourself. I guess now that Im working on things and I live independently and Ive got career and study plans (next year) that my Abnormal behavior wont be the overwhelming type, but it will still be there, Im just lonely, but I know you cant use someone to fill in the lonely space, so maybe Im not quite ready just yet. ', 'Thanks, I know there are a lot of people who would be devastated if I gave up, the thoughts of Suicide are just quite overwhelming and disabling and it almost makes me Anger that Im not allowed to die because of the Ache it will cause others. Logically it is a bad idea, emotionally I just want the merry-go-round to stop.', 'So much of the stuff you read about side effects will not apply to you personally. Sometimes the only way is to try it and see how it affects your personal body chemistry. Every single medication I have tried- and there is a lot! have had forums and forums written about all the nasty stuff that can happen, but so far only some of those things happened to me, and also when it comes to the side effect of weight gain- thats always one I Anxiety about, it is very dependable on your bodys reaction. My mum is on seroquel (and another med that apparently makes you pudgy) which is supposed to make you gain Hyperactive behavior huuge amounts of weight- Hyperactive behavior 30kg but she has been on it for ages and only put pn Hyperactive behavior 5kg- she was kinda too thin before and is now is quite slim/average (60kg) so she never got massive Hyperactive behavior the claims on the Internet say. So it all depends on your own reaction. Hell my current medication has serious rashes and mild rashes as a side effect and I havent had either of those happen, also when I took lithium a lot of people were saying they gained a lot of weight- I lost a lot of weight. So side effect profiles are iffy, especially ones you read on the net, take them with a grain of salt and discuss those concerns with your doctor and they will have a better understanding of what to expect. ', 'Oh man. Fuck. Thats why I avoid happy people until I have the energy to be a good actress and pretend Im one of them in Phobia, Social situations. ', '24', 'Ah cool, thanks for the longer, less harsh version. ', 'Yeah when its the last minute I somehow pull through the same way, its just very exhausting and unhealthy (once did an assignment from midnight to 10am because I Ventricular Dysfunction, Left it so late, only had one break). I want to change this. ', 'Thanks for this, it does make me feel better about my situation. ', 'I usually enjoy art, reading, music and usually exercise but all have fallen by the wayside. I had started learning the guitar last year but stopped coz it cost money for lessons and i wasnt practising enough after a while. So I Hypersomnia mostly, watch tv or go on the net. ', 'I Hyperactive behavior this Irritable Mood! ', 'You are right about the hands on being easier to concentrate- I can focus when I make things but its when I have to read something boring or write something I dont care about that makes it difficult. ', 'Me too. Are you already on medication for it? ', 'I feel Hyperactive behavior that a lot. Its hard, when I have a good moment or enjoy something even if its for just an hour, it reminds me that feelings dont last forever, and being unhappy constantly with no relief forever is almost impossible. Also sometimes I find solace in some philosophical ideas about what happiness really is, and how it can be found even when your life circumstances arent what you want. Mindfulness meditation is beneficial for coping with unpleasant emotions, it has been shown to help a lot- so thats worth looking into. Im still trying myself and am yet to grasp it, but thats the advice I have been given to help with similar feelings to yours that involve worrying about future happiness. ', 'Its great that you are going to be seeing a therapist, they are trained to talk about all these things with you and to help you work through issues. Its a big step and Anxiety Mental Depression about your first appointment happens with everyone that I know who sees a therapist. As far as my experience goes, they will not insist on medication if you say you really dont want it. I need it because part of my problem is chemical/biologically mood related- but talk/psychotherapy and group therapy is what is what is mostly helping me deal with life issues and everyday life problems and relationship issues- so to answer your question you can get past the hard times without medication (just in some cases its more complicated than just external factors making it hard and chemical assistance is required).* edit: also everything is confidential, your information an what you talk about should be kept confidential by the therapist . ', 'Thank you for sharing your struggles with mental illness. So many people look normal on the outside when inside they are really struggling and using lots of energy just to keep up normal living stuff. I think you are a very strong person to be able to do this and its awesome you have been able to work on some of the disturbing voices. I guess all we can do is keep working on getting better and tying to keep life normal maybe in the meantime someone who matches us will accept us, illness and all, and become part of our lives. Also, Hyperactive behavior me, you have probably heard it before- you are still young! Thats something on our side, to know there isnt really an urgent rush to find a partner and make babies etc just yet! ', 'Can you sharehouse to cut down cost of living? Can you go to the government for assistance? Can you to to the college and gain help for your circumstances? Do you have any other relatives or friends who will let you stay with them for cheaper? Can you discuss these issues with your family so they reconsider or offer a solution that will allow you to stay? These are suggestions. I dont know what your Phobia, Social welfare system is Hyperactive behavior where you live, here in Australia they have some sort of help for students so they dont end up working 80 hour weeks to afford college, but from the sounds of it you are in USA judging from the wage you are getting. Im not sure what else to suggest. *edit just read you want to do hospitalities, is there a way you can get a junior position in your area of interest that will then help towards your studies or give you credits for that area of studying? Like a traineeship in hospitality?', 'Haha, yes the general consensus is we Abnormal behavior people are sexual masters! You say you dont bring up your Bipolar Disorder initially, wen do you feel Hyperactive behavior its appropriate to reveal it to someone? ', 'No I dont have a good reads account, just loads of books around haha. How do you get one? What are the Hunger games books Hyperactive behavior? I liked the movie. ', 'I know. How. My brain wont slow down. ', 'So cutting from 4mg to 2mg or 1mg say just for a day or every second day, will that cause problems? Or is it more if you stop completely for a few days? I will definitely be talking to my doctor anyway. Just my script says take 1mg to 2mg up to twice a day max (so 4mg) but I guess if Ive been maxing out everyday then thats an issue if I want to take less or none other days. I know if I want to completely stop I have to do a tapering plan though. I hope its not gonna be as be as Effexor withdrawals, fuck that was awful. ', 'I think I would enjoy that ', 'Its just that feeling of when you do do some work, "oh this isnt too bad" but then it takes forever and a lot of effort to actually START and before you know it youre pulling an all nighter. ', 'I kept my practical subject where I go to a school and help once a week- that part I can do but the writing up an organising the observations into focus points and summarising them is something I am having trouble getting myself to do. My other subject I kept was society an education (teaching geography and history and Phobia, Social studies) there are a lot of readings and. my first assignment is a group assignment (one other person as a member) the technical side (has to be a self running presentation/video) is troubling me and I am not pulling my weight as when start to research and write just lose my ability to stay on task. I am on a small dose if dexamphetamine a day and my other meds are lamotrigine. I took lithium for a while but it went Megacolon, Toxic after I didnt eat or drink properly over a weekend so stopped it for the moment. All this study avoidance, I think its coz I am just lazy. ', 'Haha, thanks I think this thread is helping me out with those giving up feelings. And its good to hear the other side of it, coz I believe its true about ill people who arent actually trying to help themselves and using their partner to rescue them (happens typically in borderline) and how damaging that is to all relationships, and I know I used to be Hyperactive behavior that, but Im getting more help and actively participating in my therapy finally, so I feel more positive now that because Ive changed my Irritable Mood Im more likely to be able to have a stable relationship. ', 'A little bit Social fear now, but thanks, good to know there is someone else going through the same thing .', 'Yeah that would help. Reading is hard for me to do for long periods at the moment, but yeah, that would help. ', 'Im a woman to clarify. But yeah I know it could be fixed but its the uncertainty thats horrible and how its all up to me being able to get well enough to fix it, I feel Hyperactive behavior time is against me, if I could press pause, get well, concentrate and press play then I could finish my studies, start to have a functional relationship with friends and maybe even meet a partner if Im lucky, eventually get a real job and career and be to be able to fit into western society and function. Right now It looks bleak if I cant get my shit together in time. ', 'My moods just sad/ hopeless . This advice is good advice though. ', 'Thanks :) ', 'I have a lot of classic type books that I started bit havent finished- Hyperactive behavior 1984, on the road, women in love, Shakespeare plays etc. I Hyperactive behavior Tim winton and am halfway through a mirokami book. I started to book thief too. All not finished. Sigh', 'Yeah I take medication for the ADHD- dexamphetamine, but only a small dose coz my doctor is worried it might make me swing up, as she is working with a possible Bipolar Disorder diagnosis at the moment. So also on lamotrigine. Was on lithium and will most likely go back on it, I had a scary toxicity on it a few weeks ago so had to stop it for the time being. ', 'I Hyperactive behavior the practical side of teaching children new concepts, helping them understand in the classroom, I can do this, but to get the point of being able to do this as a full time job I have to study and do all the boring stuff at Uni - without the ability to do that I cant do what I want. To do what I want I first have to do what I hate, this is the case with most careers isnt it? I just need higher tolerance and less laziness to get through the stuff I dont Hyperactive behavior so I can eventually do something that I do Hyperactive behavior. ', 'Ok that sounds serious, will have a talk with her before I try to decrease anything. ', 'So did that method help not getting bad withdrawals? ', 'What was the deleted comment??', 'As a woman welding could be a challenging area to get into because of sex discrimination not entirely gone from the workplace in Australia. But as you suggested I do consider seriously the option of a vocational occupation helping and may very well go down that path. I still may encounter the same issues of concentration and Anxiety Mental Depression no matter what career path I start upon.

Indicator

Im still not sure how youre fucking up these Phobia, Social relationships. If youre awkward Im sure your friends are used to it by now, and if youve chosen the wrong friends then all you need to do is burn some bridges and meet the right people. You cant feel guilty for being in this position. Just imagine how guilty your friends and family will feel if you go through with this; knowing that they must have overlooked some sign that showed how you were truly feeling. Whats your relationship with your parents Hyperactive behavior? There must be someone, besides me, that you can talk to. Someone real, who can look you in the eye and honestly listen to what you have to say. I understand what you Irritable Mood by feeling as though your emotional outbursts are fits of acting, and how insincere and imposter Hyperactive behavior it feels. But even if it doesnt feel Hyperactive behavior it has the weight its supposed to, getting it out is what matters. Someone needs to know, you cant go this alone. Make a list of people who you think you could tell. And then finally work up the courage to do it. If theyre your friends then theyll definitely care about how youre feeling. And if the friends you have arent good enough then think about talking to a family member.If you strive for days Hyperactive behavior the other day eventually these fits have to subside. Its clear that you love being active socially, so why not just throw yourself into the mix. Text and friend and go do something. Im not sure where you are but over hear on the East Coast its gorgeous.Get rid of that knife, man. Its not the fits that are driving you to pick up the knife, its the knife thats driving you into fits. Having that around is a way for you to imagine how fickle your mortality is, and its not good for making progress.Think hard and tell me what causes you to be fit free. I understand that youre still going to harbor a negative Irritable Mood during them, but what helps you maintain your composure?', 'Ive been in the same position as you, but 17 is the crossroads of all our lives. High school may have been shit, it was for me, but college is a whole other world. My advice to you is just give it a try. Wait for college to start, go into it with an open mind and see where it takes you.What side of the country are you going to school in?', 'Im sorry, I thought Id already responded. Ive been swamped with finals. Your second paragraph is funny actually, because I was thinking that too, except vise versa. That you were a manifestation of my own internal conflicts, but we both know thats highly unlikely. I am sending my thoughts to your head, and you, me. But despite the little weight that these words may carry, I just want you to know how much I dont want you to commit suicide.How have the last few days been? Any good days?', 'Why should anyone do anything when all they have is blind hope for the future? That is the very nature of life, yet here we are. Our ancestors on the plains of Africa hundreds of thousands of years ago were driven by blind hope and the urge to survive (though most likely only the latter, seeing as they wouldnt be able to process such abstract ideas as hope). It was hope that kept them running from the lions and pursuing ways to prolong their lives. All we have as humans is hope. By taking your life you not only kill your hope, but the hope that your parents have for the life you will lead.But life is much more than being happy and unhappy. By taking your life you guarantee that you will be *nothing* ever again. That you will both cease to feel the Ache and the good that you have forgotten. I know you have felt joy, but your mind is clouded by your despair. As a human being you are privileged with a great many things; as a human living in the United States you are privileged with even more. Suicide may seem Hyperactive behavior a glorious end, but it is an end you will never appreciate. Life is filled with suffering. Ive lost a best friend to cancer, another to war. Ive lost family members to car accidents and disease. I have known my fair share of suffering, along with the turmoils that Plague my mind. But life is about finding meaning through suffering. Nihilism is correct when it says that life has no intrinsic meaning, but that does not Irritable Mood that we cannot give it meaning. Suffering is a means to finding the meaning in our lives, and your suffering is no different.Your life has meaning, and you have near infinite potential. Life has just begun for you. Plus, none of the shit youre dealing with actually matters. High school is the most bullshit filled period of our lives and has absolutely no bearing on who we become. The key is simply to survive it, and as you know thats the hardest part.Argue with me all you want. But at least listen to what I have to say.', 'Maybe you should try opening up to him more? You guys are in the same sort of boat, just for different reasons. Real dialogue with a friend could be helpful, but youve got to take the steps to bring it to the level you need. I guess what Im saying is, dont settle for comfort words. Would you have rather someone have found you? I find that when Im down or suicidal I crave an intervention but dont go looking for it.', 'Im thinking youre grossly underestimating your potential, my friend. If you have friends now you can make some more. You just have to look in the right places. You say that you wont be able to make any friends that arent as socially awkward as you, but why would you want to be friends with people who cant relate to you? There is a lot more to sociality than being popular, trust me. I can count my friends on one hand, and theyre all just Hyperactive behavior me: nerdy, average looking, and fit with a desire to change the world. You want to be around people who are Hyperactive behavior you, because the people who are Hyperactive behavior you, Hyperactive behavior you.This world is filled with people, certainly youre compatible with one of them. Fuck it, find one on [/r/suicidewatch](/r/suicidewatch), as long as you dont go all Romeo and Juliet on us. But demeanor is key, the only thing that youre suffering from is poor perspective. I know how real it feels, how hopeless you can get when you feel down, but theres a way out.Im curious, what is triggering these fits.Also, whats your motivation for going into pre-med?', 'You cant expect these changes to happen overnight. This is a long term process.I thought youve already been accepted? You dont have a better self image after putting on muscle? You dont feel good that youve changed your body for the better and accomplished something? External changes dont happen until internal ones do.', 'You know what I love about my college courses? All of my professors admit to being fuck-ups before they got into their second year of college. My all time favorite professor admits to being only a few levels away from being mentally handicapped in Drug abuse school, but after she found her passion she went on to get a doctoral degree and published an awesome ethnography on sex in the Caribbean. The change in environment is key. If you can do me one favor, dont kill yourself until youve at least tried to experience college. The language youre using makes it patently obvious that you really dont want to end it. What youre craving is a major life change. You and I both know what a great community Reddit is, have you ever thought of checking out [/r/Fitness](/r/Fitness) or some other activity based sub? By keeping your body active youll take a lot of pressure off of your mind, as well as prove to yourself that you can make progress, etc. While video games are a great way to dull your senses, they dont really do much for you in the long run, and its easy to get down on yourself about it.Dude, if you have an interest in those fields you should check out Paul Farmers biography *Mountains Beyond Mountains*. Also, Im not sure what your religious background is, but if youre anything else Hyperactive behavior the rest of reddit and have a penchant for nihilism, you should check out Sam Harris. Hes an absolutely brilliant neuro-scientist that gives some awesome arguments against religion using your field.Work ethic doesnt matter in Drug abuse school. Really man, its all bullshit and youll realize that as soon as you get to college. Its much easier to work at things you love/have an interest in. Plus science majors always stick together because of how difficult it is. All of the bio and med students I know know every other bio/med student, and they all hang out together. Plus, at least at my school, theyre all pretty cool people and love to have a good time.The point is to survive the now though, right? What sort of plan could we put together that would help you enjoy your summer?', 'I know exactly what you Irritable Mood, man. I never want to tell anyone but I always want someone to ask, just so I can some of it out. But the problem is that no one ever asks, and youre just Ventricular Dysfunction, Left alone with yourself and your sadness.Maybe hell pry a bit more. I know Ive said this before but dont you think hed prefer you opening up to him as opposed to you killing yourself and him knowing that he could have talked to you about it? Plus, it goes without saying that you killing yourself would most definitely exacerbate his depression. Im sorry if Im kind of guilting you out of this, but Im sure youre doing it already. Keep being a good friend though, Im sure he needs you just as much as you need him, even though youre both unwilling to open up to the other. Howd today go? When is your prom anyway? Or is that no longer an issue?', 'Come on, man. It cant be that bad. How awkward could you possibly be? And unless youre verbally abusing your friends, I doubt youre fucking up your Phobia, Social relationships. No one gets into their reach school, thats why theyre called reach schools. College is college is college is college; youll get the same experience everywhere. Why was yesterday so great? And what made this fit so terrible?', 'PM me about prom. Im going to respond to the rest of your post tomorrow after my finals, but I have to get some Hypersomnia now.', 'So what things have changed? Was the weekend good enough to postpone suicide?Im sorry Ive been afk. I had to go home and deal with somethings. I hope your weekend went well, man. Keep fighting, once the major stressors are gone Im sure youll feel a bit better.', 'Was anyone there to witness this breakdown?', 'Why must you be haunted by the past? Youre still unwilling to accept the fact that this perspective is surmountable, and that you can look back on this as a time where you nearly gave in but overcame it. I strongly believe that college will do wonders for you if you throw yourself into it. Judging by how you speak, you seem incredibly intelligent, which is exactly what will help you succeed in college. It is a time to start anew, far from everyone and everything that reminds you of how you feel. Your mind will still be with you, but it will be busy processing everything thats going on. Though sociability is a key part of college, connecting with professors and RAs is also a major part, and often even more satisfying. If you extract yourself from your own self-deprecation, and engage with all that surrounds you Im sure that youll see some value in it.Do this for me. Extract yourself from how you are feeling now. When was the last time you felt joy, euphoria, bliss? There was a time, was there not? It can come again too. No matter the struggle, there is a way to overcome it. ', 'Ill miss you.', 'Were you?', 'Do you play Dark Souls? If you do, you know that the whole point of the game is for you to die (read: fail), until you figure out how not to die.. The game forces you to try over and over to overcome the seemingly impossible and in a way it forces you to give up. But eventually, through perseverance you can succeed. Listen man, Im shit with analogies, and not much better at anything else. But if theres one thing Ive learned, its that fighting my way through shit always makes me feel better, and victory is the sweetest thing of them all.So fuck, right now youre stuck in Blighttown. The most abysmal of all locations, and you just want to throw your fucking controller at the wall. And thats fine, we all do. But my point is, Blighttown is just a miniscule percentage of your life, and eventually youll get fucking awesome armor and kick the shit out of everything. All you have to do is fight. You can either carry on, keep fighting, and eventually look back and see how Localized Rash generalised you were for wanting to throw your controller, or you can quit. And youll never know what could have been.One last thing, college loans and tuition is immediately refunded if you commit suicide. So even if you do try and hate it, youre parents wont miss a dime. But Im sure that they would pay any amount to see you alive and happy. Remember that. You are their most precious gift.What say you?', 'AP exam are going to end eventually though. If you strive through this and make it to the summer there has to be a way to set yourself up for a good time until college. Once all of this school weight is off your shoulders youll have plenty of time to feel better and try and work through this. Youre just under a lot of pressure right now.If you cant open up to anyone, then you still have me to talk to. Why do you think this weekend is going to be the breaking point?', 'What guarantee do you have that you wont be able to overcome this? Your only frame of reference is from this perspective of despair, and so naturally your assumptions are bound to be negative. Youve said it yourself, if you make it through this itll be much better. The only reason why you believe it isnt worth it is because you are mired in this perspective.Depression is a vicious cycle, and I understand how your mind is battling against itself. But life is a huge fucking experience, and your frame of experience is infinitesimal compared to the rest of your life span. How can you be so sure of anything when youve only been alive for 17 years? How can you be so sure of your potential to overcome this when youve only been emotionally and socially conscious for barely half that time? Shit, at this age your body hasnt even finished developing. Im 21 and Im still figuring shit out about myself. Youre going to prom with your friend, are you not? Why do you think thats going to be so terrible?

Supportive

Let me tell you something about life. Its not an easy road and its full och shit and fuckups. But theres more to it, dont think about the past it will only drag you down. So think ahead you got a full life ahead of you and there will be times you feel down but there will also be happiness. Pursuit your dreams and dont give in to your inner demons.', 'I can say that everything is gonna be alright and you can be strong enough to survive this but I have never even in the slightest been Depressed mood or Drug abuse to any drug at all. So I cant really start to imagine what you have been through these past 8 years. What I do know that it wasnt only because of the phone that rang you stopped yourself to commit suicide. A part of you as you said wants to live and I believe if you can find the strength in that you can overcome this no matter how bad the odds are.  However the first step when it comes to things Hyperactive behavior this is that you have to be brave. You need to tell your family that you dont want to live but you are trying your best. Your family can help you and they will be there for you because in the end you are a part of them.  Now if you have old friends thats doing drugs aswell or even selling to you... You need to stop having any sort of contact with them. It needs to stop, its hard I know some friends can be people who has always been at your side but you need to let go. If you feel Hyperactive behavior doing more talk just PM me.

Supportive

Perhaps the way you are learning is the problem. I know when I first started learning to program what helped me was picking a project I wanted to design and then figuring out all the components that would be required from a language to complete that project. I also learned that Im terrible at learning from ebooks, or website tutorials, and that videos (though they can be long and boring) helped me grasp the language easier than those. Do you have any projects you want to build? ', 'Have you seen a different doctor at a different hospital for a second opinion? Hospitals are a business just Hyperactive behavior every other, and some of them have very questionable business practices, it never hurts to get a second opinion. Your husband loves you and married you to be with you in Nausea and in health, he doesnt want anyone else because you both chose each other. Let him in and work through this together. ', 'None of this is worth you taking your own life. Your parents may be the most horrible and terrible people to exist but you shouldnt give them the satisfaction of your death, you need to try and live in spite of them. In less than 365 days youll be 18 and can apply for new visas, or residency on your own. Once you are on your own you can build the life that you deserve and only see your family on your terms. I dont know about how your university expenses are being paid, but I assure you that there are a wealth of scholarships available for anyone who chooses to pursue them. Next time instead of Depressed mood yourself because of your family, sit down and look for scholarships on sites Hyperactive behavior [Fastweb](http://www.fastweb.com/) and apply for them. Each and every time they Anger you or frustrate you turn that Anger into a positive force and use it to start building your life without them. ', 'You shouldnt let another human have that kind of control over you. Ive been in your shoes, and I lost the person who I thought was going to be the one. We had made promises, we had been there for each other, and then one day she decided to stop being there for me, she cheated on me, and Ventricular Dysfunction, Left. I even tried to repair the relationship a few months later, it worked for a bit, but I ended up in a worse spot than I was. Only after letting go, and not looking for a replacement, but looking to let go, looking to find a way to make me a better person was I able to turn my life around. Instead of trying to find another person who was just Hyperactive behavior her, I just focused on becoming a better me, and learning to love me. You can do this too. You can improve skills, or exercise to become a more physically capable person. Spend time, a good period of time six months to a year, or more if you need to to become a better you. Dont make this new year about her, and her control over you. Its time that you started living life for you, become the best you that you can be!', 'Would you Hyperactive behavior to talk about it, Im here and Id love to listen.', 'Ive never been to university, it wasnt in the cards because of finances. I started using the talents I had and worked my way up to get an entry level job as IT / SEO, I took that job and learned as much as I could about the SEO / internet marketing industry and jumped ship (a bit too early) to a better job. I worked at that internet marketing job for a few years and learned as a went, until I applied for a better paying position at a marketing firm. 2 and a half years later Im the digital marketing director of the marketing firm. I still havent been in university, and I have a job in a very competitive industry. Life gets better, with hard work you will get there!', 'Hey, it looks Hyperactive behavior youve already got a few people who are here to help you. If not, send me a PM and we can talk as long as you need.', 'I see that you have an interest in computer science, but you are worried that you wont be able to get into the field that you want because of your current grades. While it is possible that you may not be immediately accepted into the university of your choice, there is the possibility of going to a community college to get good grades in core classes (most likely math and science heavy) and then transferring to a respected four year institution. However you will need to focus on getting strong marks. Another option is going in under academic probation by writing a university letter of why you know your grades alone arent good enough, but that youre willing to work hard to ensure that your previous actions were not reflective on you as a whole.', 'I dont know your mother, and would never pretend to, but perhaps its best to just not bring up classes for a bit till the current wave of drama blows over. As soon as it has then try to explain to them that the major you are pursing that will be the best for you and the family is not currently offered online. If youre pursing a major that would be easily taken online, you may be forced to decide between a different major or stuck at home with the family. If their motives for keeping you locked away are selfish (for the pride of the family, or to keep the family name "clean" by keeping you out of trouble) remember that you can use that selfishness against them (the family would look very prestigious if you had a lofty degree). ', 'Communications degrees go further than you might think. Ive got a brother with a com degree and he works for an energy consultant firm, while paying his way through law school. The job pays very well and gives him full benefits. I myself never went to university, and spent 3 years of my life working at an Arbys from age 21-24. Through a ton of hard work, and dumb luck I now have a career that I honestly love, that pays me a very well. You are not your degree, you are the sum of every experience that has ever happened to you, good or bad. You can take any degree and any skills you have and turn it into a gold mine because this life is yours. The fact is that Communications majors have [lower unemployment rates than you might expect](http://www.studentsreview.com/unemployment_by_major.php3). Do you know why this is? Because there is a use for them, and because communication majors can use their skills to persuade their way into cushy sales, marketing, and PR jobs. For all the STEM majors that boast about low employment rates Communications majors have a lower unemployment rate than many engineering majors and are only a fraction away from math major unemployment rates. Do not beat yourself up, because you are going to do things much greater than your $8.50/hr job, one day you will look back on this and think they were dark times in your life, but they will propel you through future hardships and into newer greener pastures. ', 'You can always tell someone, even if youre a great great grandfather. Telling someone doesnt make you any less strong. No one has to walk through life alone, letting people in and receiving help isnt a sign of weakness.', 'You Hyperactive behavior to code, what languages do you know? There are plenty of jobs out there that knowing to code will put you ahead of other applicants, that do not require math (or for that matter a degree). ', 'There is always room in life for more friends, feel free to chat with me!', 'Death is a terrible way out, you give them control. You may have to live with them for a while longer, but there will come a day when you leave to pursue your own life. Im sorry that you are not in the position to make that decision for yourself right now, but you taking your own life means that they win. If you dont mind me asking, under what conditions will they allow you to leave their control?', 'That truly is upsetting, but at 18 years old in the United States there is nothing legally they can do to prevent you from leaving, or taking a citizenship exam and leaving, or filing for your own education visa and leaving. There are many people whove Ventricular Dysfunction, Left broken homes in similar situations. The one thing your family will have over you is finances. This is why you have to work hard for scholarships and save money so that you can separate yourself from your family.

Indicator

Oops, I remembered life is pointless. Oh well, guess theres always going to be some young person who thinks lifes grand! * bang * ', 'Youre right, most people dont know you exist, but thats okay. You feel invisible in Drug abuse school? What about after Drug abuse school when everyone moves apart to follow their careers? Who will have time to notice you and talk to you then? When do you have time to notice famous people? When do you have the time to notice Einstein? Wasnt Einstein a great guy? Why dont you worship his greatness *all the time*? When you get out of bed. When you eat breakfast. When you take a shit. Einstein. Einstein. Einstein. You dont notice him or think about him at all because you have your own life and your own problems. Its okay for you to pass by unnoticed. Its okay because, most of the time, everybodys unnoticed. Just try to be a good person. Be good to everybody because theyre okay. Be good to yourself because youre okay too. Stop Depressed mood yourself. You dont deserve that. You need to tell yourself that these thoughts arent welcome. Trust yourself and be yourself. When youre sad, alone, and in Ache dont go online to soak your head in Megacolon, Toxic memes so you can foster the Ache, youll only make things worse that way. You dont need to join some online sadness club so you can feel Hyperactive behavior you fit in somewhere. You need to accept yourself, not destroy yourself for not fitting into your tiny little school. So what if youre a weirdo? Do you know how many weirdos there are? Join the chess team or something if for no other reason than to see that there are stadiums full of weirdos out there. I know youre going to hate me for suggesting this, but you should absolutely tell an Respiratory Distress Syndrome, Adult you can trust that youve Chest Pain yourself. Some people have made it their entire career, their entire life, to help people Hyperactive behavior you. The people on reddit are nice, many of them well intentioned, but most of them arent professionals, myself included. The sooner you start talking with a professional, the sooner youll be able to put the cutting and everything behind you and move forward with your life. You sound Hyperactive behavior a good person, be good to yourself. ', 'Some parents dont view their children as children, but as machines for providing them with money. Parents fail and fail and fail at life, so they create a new life, in a last ditch effort to overcome their failure, only to be disappointed with the results. Your parents suck. Your hierarchical language sucks, sorry, its the truth. I think you should live. Revenge is what I live for. Success is good revenge. ', 'did you make that up yourself?', 'I wrote this one a while back too, I call it **"The Way I Am"**, hope ya Hyperactive behavior it...I sit back with this pack of Zig Zags and this bagOf this weed it gives me the shit needed to beThe most meanest MC on this - on this EarthAnd since birth Ive been cursed with this curse to just curseAnd just blurt this berserk and bizarre shit that worksAnd it sells and it helps in itself to relieveAll this Tension dispensin these sentencesGettin this Stress thats been eatin me recently off of this chestAnd I rest again peacefully (peacefully)...But at least have the decency in youTo leave me alone, when you freaks see me outIn the streets when Im eatin or feedin my daughterTo not come and speak to me (speak to me)...I dont know you and no,I dont owe you a mo-therfuck-in thingIm not Mr. NSync, Im not what your friends thinkIm not Mr. Friendly, I can be a prickIf you tempt me my tank is on Depersonalization (is on Depersonalization)...No patience is in me and if you offend meIm liftin you 10 feet (liftin you 10 feet)... in the airI dont care who is there and who saw me just jaw youGo call you a lawyer, file you a lawsuitIll smile in the courtroom and buy you a wardrobeIm Exhaustion of arguin (of arguin)...I dont Irritable Mood to be Irritable Mood but thats all I can be is just me**[Chorus:]**And I am, whatever you say I amIf I wasnt, then why would I say I am?In the paper, the news everyday I amRadio wont even play my jamCause I am, whatever you say I amIf I wasnt, then why would I say I am?In the paper, the news everyday I amI dont know its just the way I amSometimes I just feel Hyperactive behavior my father, I hate to be botheredWith all of this nonsense its constantAnd, "Oh, its his lyrical content -- the song Guilty Conscience has gotten such rotten responses"And all of this controversy circles meAnd it seems Hyperactive behavior the media immediatelyPoints a finger at me (finger at me)...So I point one back at em, but not the index or pinkieOr the ring or the thumb, its the one you put upWhen you dont give a fuck, when you wont just put upWith the bullshit they pull, cause they full of shit tooWhen a dudes gettin bullied and shoots up his schoolAnd they blame it on Marilyn (on Marilyn)... and the heroinWhere were the parents at? And look where its atMiddle America, now its a tragedyNow its so sad to see, an upper class ci-tyHavin this happenin (this happenin)...Then attack Eminem cause I rap this way (rap this way)...But Im glad cause they feed me the fuel that I need for the fireTo burn and its burnin and I have returned**[Chorus:]**And I am, whatever you say I amIf I wasnt, then why would I say I am?In the paper, the news everyday I amRadio wont even play my jamCause I am, whatever you say I amIf I wasnt, then why would I say I am?In the paper, the news everyday I amI dont know its just the way I amIm so Nausea and Exhaustion of bein admiredThat I wish that I would just die or get firedAnd dropped from my label and stop with the fablesIm not gonna be able to top on "My Name is... "And pigeon-holed into some pop-py sensationThat got me rotation at rocknroll stationsAnd I just do not got the patience (got the patience)...To deal with these cocky caucasians who thinkIm some wigger who just tries to be black cause I talkWith an accent, and grab on my balls, so they always keep askinThe same fuckin questions (fuckin questions)...What school did I go to, what hood I grew up inThe why, the who what when, the where, and the howTil Im grabbin my hair and Im tearin it outCause they drivin me Abnormal behavior (drivin me Abnormal behavior)... I cant take itIm racin, Im pacin, I stand and I sitAnd Im thankful for ev-ery fan that I getBut I cant take a SHIT, in the bathroomWithout someone standin by itNo I wont sign your autographYou can call me an Irritable Mood Im glad**[Chorus:]**Cause I am, whatever you say I amIf I wasnt, then why would I say I am?In the paper, the news everyday I amRadio wont even play my jamCause I am, whatever you say I amIf I wasnt, then why would I say I am?In the paper, the news everyday I amI dont know its just the way I am ', 'Hey. I just wanted to say that your story struck a chord that resonated a lot of the same feelings I have about love and society. Im gay too, and I never had a problem with it as much as I had a problem with the society around me that programmed me to hate who I was. I dont want to play the game that this society is playing, all I want is to wait out this existence with someone I love. The prospect of being alone terrifies me, being isolated while at the same time contributing hopelessly to the goings on of the world. For years theres been this constant pressure in my mind to capitulate and die. Despite several of the changes Ive made recently, Suicide still seems Hyperactive behavior the way Ill eventually end my story. Yet Ive so far found ways to distract myself from doing it. I kinda wanna leave the country and go someplace else, be a bum on the street for a while, eventually Id find work and be in roughly the same financial situation Im in now. Theres a litany of things I could do besides kill myself, write things, make art, etc... I kinda wanna see your art by the way, though Id understand If you didnt want to share. My mom used to see me drawing and ask to see it, but I knew she wouldnt Hyperactive behavior it so Id throw away the piece and make something interesting she could look at. Anyway, I dont live near you, so I cant visit at the moment, would you be interested in being pen pals or something? ', 'Ah, nice to see someone not bash me over my use of the word bullshit. :)Thats pretty interesting, I also have a difficult time not separating complementary terms. Its just kind of something I learned to be sensitive to though, Hyperactive behavior the front and back of the same thing. Light/Dark, Sound/Silence, attention/oblivion, up/down, etc, etc... I dont really think its a "disorder" though. They say that it will *seem* to the "Nausea" person that its just a personality trait, but what if it really is? Since I was 11 parents and teachers would say I was "stoic", "thoughtful", "too Respiratory Distress Syndrome, Adult", to me these were "honorable" traits for me to embrace. Now I feel Hyperactive behavior an ageless soul surrounded by adults that are really still children inside. I know Im impermanent, I know Im insecure, but I feel that there is wisdom in knowing that I am these things. Maybe I grew up too fast, drained the world of wonder, and now its time to go. Whats wrong with being bleak anyway? There really *is* no hope beyond the promise of oblivion for each and every human being. Life can be fun, but going to Hypersomnia after a long day of work can be fun too! Dont tell me youve never sunk your face into your pillow in very much the same way as youd sink your teeth into a nice juicy steak; ready to embrace the *flavor* of not being awake. Isnt that *just* how we all want to go? Embracing our impermanence with open arms rather than hopefully clinging onto nothing? ', 'I work at a call center (hell) and I have a soft, nasally, girly, Quentin Tarantino voice, so 90% of the time people call me mam or darling or whatever. Im a man, yet I listen to this shit every day for 7 or 8 hours. Look, Im not rubbing your nose in my experiences, Im just thinking you should keep trying; take some testosterone if you think it will help you live a better life, I know for sure Ive considered it. You dont have to go to college, either. College, here in America, is a debt-slave factory anyway. Become determined to have a good life, you can make it. You dont have to distort yourself to become something youre not, nor do you have to kill yourself to gain respect (nobody will respect you for committing Suicide) you can find someone who likes you for who you are. You gotta try things. ', 'I dont really have episodes, I have persistent Mental Depression disorder.', 'Maybe you could get somebody to pay for a gym membership for shelter? Where I go its less than $15 a month, which I think is close to what people pay for Netflix, and the place has showers and even washing and drying machines. If it is a 24 hour gym you can work out in the evening, put what few belongings you have in your gym locker, and then, with your modified sleeping patterns, pretend that youre simply "sunbathing" in the park when, in fact, youre secretly a bum innocently chilling under a tree. With this kind of life, its easy to save money and if youre clever about the whole thing nobody will suspect a thing. Even with a minimum wage job you should be able to save money for whatever, but I imagine that you might end up gambling it all away anyway, so you gotta solve that problem, most of all. I used to work in the casinos and I feel for ya, sorry youre down on your luck. Dont commit crimes, especially in fucking Florida, and dont kill yourself, either. ', 'Try reading this book: ["Overcoming Depersonalization"](http://www62.zippyshare.com/v/42594556/file.html) You are not alone. For me it was Hallucinations, Visual snow syndrome that separated myself from the world around me.Because the distortions are permanent, I feel permanently separated. Whenever something new happens in my field of vision it really bothers me, Hyperactive behavior, it actually hurts, because I cant shut it off, and I want to. I relate to and appreciate what you wrote and are going through. Hang in there. ', 'Because meaninglessness and absurdity walk arm and arm with each other?', 'It feels Hyperactive behavior the world being suffocated by positivist distortions.

Ideation

I feel youre Ache pal. My world feels Hyperactive behavior its falling apart sometimes as well. My wife of 9 years is in the process of taking the kids and moving back with her mother. All of this is happening 1 month after my father died suddenly. I know that I could never take my own life though. God knows I though about it. 2 things went through my mind that stopped that thought dread in its tracks:1. Them boys need their father. I cant abandon my kids when theyre going to need me the most. 2. I watched everyone react to the death of my father. I saw the loss and the sorrow, I couldnt do that to my family; it would be the most unfair thing possible. Things seem dark man I know. You just have to weather this storm to get to that sunny day thats going to follow. You can do it. Its not much but if you ever want to shoot me a message about anything, feel free anytime. Im rooting for you. Edit: My formatting is all jacked, sorry about that. Im on my phone and cant seem to figure it out. ', 'Hello friend, I read your note and noticed that you addressed some people by name on that To line. While I dont know you personally I think that I can make a safe assumption that those are the people that you care for most and care about you a great deal. If thats true then that means youve built a place in their heart; a place that would become barren if you were to do something. Im so sorry for your Ache and what you went/are still going through. Even though I cant imagine this Ache as real as Im sure your feeling it, I know that what youre planning is not the answer. Please dont do this. ', '>Sorry I cant be clearer.Dont be sorry, you did a great job of being clear. Those are some great interests, dont downplay it. I did some quick Googling and with those interests alone I found a list of occupations: http://www.shorter.edu/academics/history/careers.htm its not exactly exhaustive, but its a start. Remember this senior project isnt going to determine the rest of your life, you have an entire world of options. This can be overwhelming and exhilarating at the same time, but you have the rest of your life to decide. I used to work with a person (her name was Cindy) and she was career nomad. When she was growing up she wanted to be a programmer and pursued that, then she got Exhaustion of it and then decided that she wanted to own her own business and opened a bakery, then when she got Exhaustion of that, she got into security (my current field and how I met her). She was in her 50s and still taking on new careers. I also had another work friend named Russ, he went to school for nursing and wound up being an IT manager. Life is Abnormal behavior Hyperactive behavior that. ', 'I know that school can seem Hyperactive behavior the end all be all of life, but trust me; it isnt. Its been about 9 years since I graduated Drug abuse school and the things that seemed so crucial to me then are so far down on my priority list now that its almost comical. If you give yourself the time, you will get through this I promise you.I Hyperactive behavior you didnt really have a strong set of interests at that age. Plus being socially inept I didnt have many friends either. It used to infuriate me that school and damn near everyone else expected me to have a defined career path already picked out. I used to think to myself the world is HUGE. Why would I want to pigeonhole myself into one field before knowing for sure that this is what I want to do with my life? These feelings are normal. Youre going through a really turbulent time in your life right now and **when** you do make it through, youll be all the stronger for it and youre going to be better equipped for what life has to throw your way.About your senior project; I fail to believe you dont have any interests whatsoever. What do you Hyperactive behavior to do? How do you spend your time relaxing? For myself I found that something I do as a hobby (something as trivial as video games and reading) can be turned into a career or even just a career interest. Anyway, back to the original question: what interests you (anything, it doesnt matter)?', 'I really feel for you, and Im sorry that youre going through a tough time. I wish that I had some inspiring words to say or I had some magic answer. Truth be told the reason why Im here is that an old acquaintance (i.e. smoking buddy) committed Suicide recently. We werent close or anything, and its been close to 5 years since I talked to her. I guess its just the finality of her decision is just something that I havent been shake. This isnt something you want. I know that you dont want to go see someone about this. But it will feel good to get all your feelings out without having a fear of being told to get over it or having someone judge you. If you dont want to do it for yourself then do it for your children. If they go through something similar in life, you can be that beacon of light for them because you went through it and prevailed. I sincerely hope this helps, while I may lack substance in my writing, I assure you that all of this came from the heart and I hope with all my being that you do get through this.', '>. I walk around the school in circles at lunch or sit on a toilet in the bathroom because I didnt want to be seen sitting by myself. I have no skills. I have no clue what I am going to do with my life. I just got my report card and Im failing all of my courses at school. This sounds just Hyperactive behavior me when I was in Drug abuse school. I failed at all things Phobia, Social and barley had any friends, passed each year by the skin on my teeth, had no idea what I wanted to do nor the drive or motivation to pursue it.A good friend of mine (he was from southern Virgina, so he always had a ton of wacky sayings) said "You can only peal 1 potato at a time." Every time I get overwhelmed by lifes problems I go back to that saying. I begin to look at each problem and what I can do about it. What is the easiest to knock out all the way up to the most complex (which usually isnt that bad once you get the small stuff out of the way). Lets start with school. You said that youre failing everything, but its only December, you have plenty of time yet to bring things up. Whats your Muscle Weakness point? Homework? Classwork? Tests? Mine was homework; you couldnt pay me to do it. Tests too, whenever I one was put in front of me I would freeze and remember nothing. As the years went on though I noticed how much homework (which seemed trivial to me) impacted my overall grade, and somehow just by doing that and my classwork it brought me up to C or D range which is passing.', 'I can sympathize with a lot of how youre feeling. My father died last Tuesday and I just keep thinking over and over how I would give anything I had just spend 1 more minute with him to tell him how he meant to me. It sounds Hyperactive behavior your grandfather knew he was loved and his last gaze in his physical body was all of the people that loved him. He was on a morphine drip so there wasnt any pain, honestly it sounds Hyperactive behavior he had a good death. ', 'Edited. My apologies. ', 'Depression has a way of making people feel all alone in a dark tunnel that nobody understands. Most of the time its not Hyperactive behavior that. ', 'Maybe those people didnt contact you because they dont know how to handle a situation Hyperactive behavior that. A lot of times conversations Hyperactive behavior that are so off-putting that people avoid them. Sometimes its fear. What if they call to ask if youre okay and you say no and tell them that you want to Chest Pain yourself? They may be totally unprepared to handle that anything that would subsequently happen they may feel would be on their heads. Im just saying that you may want to give them the benefit of the doubt. Also, since I know none you, you friends could just be self absorbed jerk-faces. Dont rule that out either. ', '>Im told the first couple years of college are just the basic required stuff, is this true?Thats how it was for me, my first year (I had a son, and then had to take an [extended] absence). I think the try and get all the general stuff out of the way first, then go to your core study (which would give you even more time to decide).Your moms plan is sound, because the longer that youre out of school, the tougher it is to go back, but you need to make sure that this plan is acceptable to you as well. If the pressure of going to college is too much, you need to tell her this; otherwise how else is she going to know? I have a feeling that if you sit down and have a long with about how all this pressure is really getting to you that shell understand. Ive seldom met a mother that doesnt prize her child above all else in this world, in the end she is going to want whats best for her daughter.

Indicator

Hey, im 99% sure youre suffering from Derealization disorder. I discovered that I had that last year and just knowing what the thing is called helped me out a . I dont know if itll help you either, but there are a LOT of people that suffer from this.', 'I think that the main reason the police havent yet gotten involved is the corrupt nature of small town politics. His father has connections in the police department, not to mention that his grandfather is a judge. We were attempting to get him emancipated, but the obstacle of his grandfather coupled with the slim chance of success led us to abandon that plan of action. The reason that my teachers praise detracts from my ability to write well lies in the self consciousness that plagues me when Im complimented. I feel Hyperactive behavior I have to constantly meet or surpass her expectations to further feed the affirmation that I crave. I really do enjoy cooperating with my friend to achieve our mutual goals, but more and more it seems as if he is taking advantage of me. When I come up with a new scheme, he subtly attempts to accredit it to himself. That could just be me being Paranoia however. I want to help my other friend as well, but I havent the slightest clue how. I dont Hyperactive behavior playing the guitar all that much, but I dont want to disappoint him. I listen to music often to help Sedated state my nerves, specifically when I have thoughts of Suicide. I mostly listen to ambient piano or electronic music, but I have a wide array of tastes. I also read a lot. Going outside and meditating seems to be working wonders, however the peacefulness that results is usually fleeting. I appreciate you listening for this long. Talking really seems to bring some relief. Im not really looking for you to solve my problems, but an outside perspective is always valuable in situations Hyperactive behavior these. I also hope you dont mind the sudden change in tone from the previous replies, I just dont have opportunities to write out Hyperactive behavior this to another person much, especially on reddit where im likely to be labeled a thesaurus warrior even though seldom use one.', 'I dont think I would ever actually do it because of the Ache it would cause to the people who do care about me. That said, the thought consumes me. I usually cant go a day without wishing I could kill myself. Also, its been going on so long it doesnt really Shock me anymore when I get these thoughts. Its almost become normal. Unbearable, but normal. I should probably give you some background info so you can better grasp the situation at hand. Ive been having near constant thoughts of Suicide and self harm for at least the past four months. Sometimes it would get better, sometimes worse, but the of death always lurked underneath whatever positive demeanor I had adopted that day. Since I started at a new school, I began to feel better. Within a week I had found a group if friends that already liked me. And I met a cute girl who seemed interested in me. She invited me over to her house for a super bowl party, so of course I accepted. I met a girl there who was perfect. She was beautiful, had good Taste, Metallic in music, and actually liked me. She actually liked *me*! Long story short we cuddled a bunch and when it came my time to ask her out and or kiss her, I awkwardly screwed it all up. I still thought we were dating for a few days though, until she refused to talk to me. This obviously was a crushing blogs to my self esteem, which was already pretty much in the negative. Caitlyn, the girl who invited me to the party, came over a couple of times that week. We got closer and eventually ended up in my making out in my bed. We got touchy feely and eventually I thought I made her cum. She told me that it needed to stay between us, which I was fine with. The next day she told me we need to forget anything ever happened. I gave her a note asking to talk about it, and she replied "why? Its not Hyperactive behavior much happened anyway no offense.". It should be noted this was my first time even kissing a girl, so it was something to me to say the least. Anyway theres more but Im just gonna let you comment on that part first ', 'Thank you this seems Hyperactive behavior it would be very helpful.', 'Its not really about having a girlfriend, just someone who will support me unconditionally, and someone that loves me', 'Yeah, Ive got a few friends that Ive confided in, but the one whose opinion I care about the most just doesnt seem to care that much that Im suicidal, even though shes already been where I am.', 'The thing is she goes from saying she loves me and would do anything for me to just kind of disregarding me', 'Every day.', 'Not op but Im in the same boat. I actually cut myself last Thursday for the first time and by the end of the weekend I had over 140 cuts. I keep wanting to go deeper, though. I feel unwanted, unattractive, worthless, and stupid. Ive been told none of these things are true, but I cant help but believe it. I make **everything** worse than it actually is, and I constantly feel Hyperactive behavior I screw everything up. Ive lied in my bed thinking about how stupid and terrible I am and how much I want to kill myself', 'I definitely plan on it, but I cant go right now for unrelated reasons. ', 'What about the people you thought cared, but evidently dont. Last night I opened up to a friend of mine who self harmed and was suicidal in the past. She just didnt really seem to Cate when I mentioned I was suicidal, and last night she just asked taking to me because she was Anger about something and she said shed text back this morning. She still hasnt.', ' I dont really want to push it on my other two close friends how much I want my best friend back becuase they both view me as their best friend. Ive already talked to my parents about it and they are just as infuriated as I am. There is a bit of background that needs to be established as well to help you better understand the predicament. My parents and his went to Drug abuse school together and never really got along. His father is more or less a functional alchoholic. He always had (illegal) moonshine at his house out in the open when i came over. Hes also mentally and physically abusive. At one point he threatened my friend with a gun and punched him in the face. He also constantly tells my friend how much of a dirty, drug addled mess his mother is. Hes told him on multiple occasions that the only reason he fought for custody of my friend was in an effort to Chest Pain his mother. Other than that whole thing, theres the fact that Ive been faking Nausea for over two months to avoid school. When I finally went to the doctor they actually found something wrong with me. This has happened before as well, although not quite on this scale. The reason I dont want to go to school is the pressure. Theres so much work, but Ive been doing a lot of it from home which helps. I have a homebound teacher who thinks my writing is better than most of the college students shes taught in all her years of being an English professor. I feel Hyperactive behavior im not as good as she thinks though, and its impeding my progress on the rest of my essays. Another thing thats been stressing me out is the decision that I feel Hyperactive behavior Im being pressure more and more about. One of my friends dsl thinks im some kind of computer and business master and wants me to go into business with him. The other wants me to join his band, but what he doesnt know is that Ive hardly practiced on my guitar since I got it four years ago. The only thing im even remotely good at is running a business, which Ive shown my prowess at by selling thousands of dollars worth of chocolate. Theres a lot more, but i still need to collect my thoughts on those issues before I post them. Oh, and it doesnt matter if you take a while to respond. I Hyperactive behavior not feeling pressured to respond immediately', 'Hey man just making sure youre still with us', 'Exactly! thats what Im trying to figure out! I know that the number of people with Bipolar Disorder is very small, so I dont know whether I have it or not. I seem to exhibit quite a few of the symptoms of the disorder, but then again there are some pieces missing from the puzzle.', 'Yeah I know. Im not even really sure how I feel about her. I just want someone who will cuddle with me and tell me its gonna be alright. It just sucks feeling so lonely.', 'My parents already know I smoke weed. I smoked with my mom a few weeks ago, which is what the text was about. Im afraid hell bring it up if she tries to help.Our small group of friends has been working to help him out of this situation, so they already know about it. Theyre kind of looking towards me as being the leader, do I need to come up with a solution that works for both parties. The counselors at my school are absolute shit, so I wont be talking to them. If I can get a therapist, I think that would help a lot, but im afraid to confront my parents about it. But I think that the best way to help my friends situation would be to call his stepmother while his father is away to ask to have a sit down with his dad. From what Ive heard, she might be somewhat on our side. I feel Hyperactive behavior I really need to remedy this situation because its causing me so much Stress and driving me towards Suicide. If youd Hyperactive behavior to know more about the situation let me know.

Behavior

Of course you should tell your parents. Definitely dont let them go on that vacation.', 'Dude youre 15. Shits gonna get better. Hit the gym, get some Proactiv and youll have all the girls you want. Even if you cant/dont want to do either of things, I am 100% sure your life will get better if you just roll with life for a while and see where it goes. You have youth, which is a blank cheque of hope and potential. Dont squander it.', 'I understand. I do. But life is worth living. I dont know how to explain it any better than that. Ive been through some dark times myself, but the good times more than make up for the bad. Im very glad to be alive and I suppose the idea of someone ending their life makes me Nausea because I love life, living, and being alive so much and want to share my passion for life with others. Suicide ... its an impulse, a moment of insanity where life seems hopeless, but its not. Life is ALWAYS worth living and if you do decide not to kill yourself theres an extremely good chance youll feel very differently about life in a few weeks or months. And as for what you said, consider this. The buildings in New York City are no less a part of nature than a beehive or birds nest. Its a habitat, built by animals, for animals, Hyperactive behavior anything else. My second piece of advice is that you can accomplish radical change in your life without ending it. If you love nature, perhaps you should move to a more rural community, or find meaning in your life through volunteering with Greenpeace or some other such organization. Theres always a reason to live, you just need to find yours. Its worth the search. Please consider it.

Indicator

Your reason to live is to help others. You are a health care professional; lots of people need your help. Theres a person in your future that you can save and you dont even know it yet. ', 'Dont do it. Your kids will be cursed forever and then their kids will be cursed, mentally. Life will get better if you just grind it out. ', 'Thanks for the gold and thanks for all you do. ', 'I live alone and I love it; the freedom is unreal. If you feel lonely, spend all your free time volunteering and helping others. ', 'Because you can help others. You can brighten someones day, you can adopt a pet, you can donate to a charity, you can help an old lady that is lonely, you can visit a Nausea kid in the hospital. There are a million things you can do. The reason to keep going is to help others. There are lots of people out there that need your help. ', 'None of us choose to exist. Life is difficult; it isnt a bowl of cherries. But, it does get better. ', 'Heck, you can just write to people on Reddit. That will help. ', 'Youve got to help others. Your life sucks...so dedicate your life to helping others. If you dont Hyperactive behavior people, help animals. Surely, there is a type of animal that you Hyperactive behavior. Dedicate your life to helping them. Thats your reason for living. ', 'Dude, dont kill yourself. You are only 17. The teenage years are ROUGH. Im 30. Im sure that many people in your school feel the same way as you do, but they dont talk about it. You are better than me in many ways. For one thing, you are only 17 and youve had a girlfriend for a year and a half. I didnt have my first girlfriend until I was 26. So, you are 9 years ahead of me in that department. Plus, your best years are ahead. There are so many reasons NOT to kill yourself. First, your family and girlfriend would be damaged for life. Thats a guarantee. Plus, life gets better. You can travel, you can go to college, you can meet new friends. The list goes on and on. The teenage years suck because of insecurity and confusion. I know how it feels. Have you talked to a teacher, relative or Respiratory Distress Syndrome, Adult about your problems? ', 'Why dont you spend all your free time volunteering with people or animals?They need your help! ', 'Dont do it. You could always do it in a few months or a year. But, you can un-shoot yourself after youve done it. ', 'Dont do it. You gotta stay in this subreddit and help other people. Thats your mission. ', 'Being single in your twenties is great. In 10 years, lots of your friends will be divorced and paying child support. Youve got friends and a job. Youre doing just fine, you just gotta keep fighting everyday. When I was 28 I had neither.Also, seek help from a therapist or a friend or family member.', 'Im 30. the teenage years are rough. I think you are brave and interesting. Have you talked to a therapist, teacher, or relative about your problems? ', 'Giving to others helped my depression. ', 'Yes, it will get better. Youll meet people. Youll have lucky experiences. When I was 28 years old I was broke, unemployed, lonely and living in my parents basement and now 2 years later Ive turned it all around. You just got to keep grinding out life day after day.Also, getting a good therapist will help you.', 'I tried to make it specific, as it helped me tremendously become un depressed. ', 'Also, dont have any children because they will suffer too, as all humans do.

Supportive

We all hurt, you are the one whom can pull yourself out of it. What else is on your mind?', 'Get more fruits and veg in there, go for a walk too! it is the little things that will make you feel Hyperactive behavior a boss.', 'What type of stuff are you eating? As silly as it sounds try to clean up what you put in to make you feel better.I was 19 when my gun jammed.

Attempt

Ive also tried talking to my SO about some sort of financial counseling or even bankruptcy, but there is always a fight to ensue after even mentioning it and that if i could just make more money everything would be ok and that I should be doing more to fix the problem which I feel Hyperactive behavior i have. Its so one sided when fighting because the arguments turn into her shouting and crying. I make roughly 50k a year currently.', 'I got laid off about three years ago and and my family and I decided to move back to where I grew up since I was offered a way to support myself through a family business which is farming of a sort. There has been the obvious family drama, but its the money thats the problem. There were promises made that were not kept despite the fact that Im making roughly 25k more a year than i did a few years ago. It seems Hyperactive behavior enough to me, but it is never enough and Hyperactive behavior I said before Im Exhaustion and feel stretched beyond my limit being berated for not doing "more" to support my family. Maybe its just me being a wuss I dont know. After awhile I have begun to feel pretty worthless and anything I do is not good enough. Not being here and hoping for some sort of accident to finish me off is a daily occurrence now. I just want some peace in my life or peace in death, and peace in life isnt looking good. I keep trying to tell myself that people need me and that I shouldnt be so selfish to even think these things, but theyre always there now. I am Depressed mood inwardly and i do my best not to show it. No one would even really suspect that i have these thoughts. I try to keep the thoughts at bay by looking forward to something and it works until the next time im told im not doing something right or im a Depressed mood husband and father then it hits me Hyperactive behavior a ton of bricks and it just seems Hyperactive behavior a better option, just a little serenity.', 'I can honestly say my situation is very similar to yours. Ive contemplated just leaving one day when she is going off the rails or just getting up saying "im Exhaustion of this shit" and walking out. The minute i have those thoughts i feel guilty for even thinking it because of my children. They are really the ones that keep me from just running my truck off a bridge some days. Shes straight up told me she is saving up money to leave me, then after things have cooled off she tries to tell me basically she will if i dont figure out how to fix our money problems. She stays at home with the kids, and she is supposed to pay the bills because i work so much and cant keep up with everything. The only problem is that she will rack up bills we cant pay because of how the money comes in due to my line of work. I get paid weekly 800 and make about 10 to 15k during the summer extra, plus another 5 or 6k extra from other related jobs i do, that doesnt include the significant tax return we get or the 250 a month Disability i get from the military. And she will give me the excuse that the money comes in from the other stuff so sporadically it goes to the bills and we are always broke. She spends the money before we even have it. And if for some reason the extra money comes in later than usual or at an odd time she is a screaming hateful Disturbance in mood until it does because i "lied" to her about the extra money. Those are the worst times because ive killed myself all day long just to come home and be bitched at. Just thinking about it makes me feel Hyperactive behavior shit, but i cant leave my kids. If i could get past the Guilt of not being with my kids everyday i would leave her.', 'Yes we have tried to sit down a few times and it always ends up with her telling me what the budget is and how it should be paid without listening to any input I have to offer. She just cant possibly survive without a 300 cable bill and her 300 cell phone bill which wouldnt be an issue with how much I make plus utilities, car note, food, mortgage, clothes, gas, necessities in general in having 4 children. The problem is there are so many "extra" bills and expenditures. The store cards, credit cards, eating out, the little things bought on a regular basis. I can see where it is going to. Theyre killing us. I even offered to go through our bank statement with her line by line for the past year to see where exactly it all went and all I got was a resounding fuck you. And yes Ive been hit a few times, and the arguments at home and on the phone are almost always in front of the kids. She doesnt abuse the kids whatsoever as far as i know, they would tell me. They have seen me get shoved and hit in the face unfortunately, never laid a hand on her in anger.

Indicator

This is true but if you are anything Hyperactive behavior me ANY caring is better than none. I know it seems Hyperactive behavior these are only words but for me I truly do care even if I do not know you in real life. I hope you are able to find some IRL peope that care.', 'I hope you are reading this. People do care.', 'Rejection is often a form of protection. Ask yourself would you really want to live with a future of instability with this person. I know it bites right now and everything seems so bleak but I promise you one day you will feel the sunshine again. ', 'Thank you. I am so Chest Pain by this it was all so unexpected and considering a couple of days before that both my parents were 911ed to the hospital with an hour of each other. There is just so much going on in my life.', 'Thanks but I have give up all hope I am just rolling with the punches.', 'Maybe it is time to start finding ways to make yourself happy first. BTDT myself. Finally decided that I would never make anyone a priority if I was merely just their option. It is difficult if you are hardwired to think of others first.', 'I posted on your other thread but I wanted to Attention Deficit Disorder I have had some similar thoughts. After thinking about it I really didnt want to die I just wanted to do something for the Ache to stop. I was told Suicide is a permanant solution for some temporary circumstance.Hang in there. I know she is her and you are you but believe me that there is always a better her and if you end it you will never get the chance. It could be you are so used to her and so comfortable with her you think that will never happen again. ', 'I am so sorry you are so sad and wanting to write a Suicide note. I was where you are at not too long ago.', 'I wish I could feel some hope. I lost my companion pug last week and all hope is gone.

Ideation

Look, there is no such thing as no one caring about you.I do. You do. Many more people do, and will, even if you dont know it right now. Please dont kill yourself, I promise you that life gets better.The way you feel right now isnt the way you will feel later on.why are you angry? why are you depressed? I know that you are strong enough to find the answers to those questions and help yourself.Besides, youve got all of us here to help you, and this entire sub cares about you.maybe you need something to make you happy? I dont know, but you do. Do the things you want to, find an interest, I promise its worth the effort.Im pretty sure that ive seen your comments in other subs across reddit too, I was surprised to find a familiar name here.Again, please dont kill yourself, if you need help we are here for you.

Supportive

If you need someone to talk to Im an inbox away, and feeling the same as you are.', 'I dont think its that people are afraid of dying. I believe its because people are afraid of what may or may not be on the other side.Plus, a lot of people would rather have a painless death. So I guess some are afraid of the possible pain. Some may be even afraid of attempting but failing, and ending up brain dead or something.', 'Ive done a little bit of job searching. I always become unmotivated to complete the applications though. I always feel Hyperactive behavior theyll never be interested therefore believe its not worth my time.Ill try harder though, and actually try to get through an application or two. ', 'Your feelings are completely understandable, but think of a few things for a moment. Virginity? That is such a small detail in the end. Youre only 20, and I actually congratulate you for holding onto it for this long. Virginity is not a symbol of being a loser or anything; the whole internet is wrong when they use virginity as an insult.Youll find a girlfriend man. Shes out there for you, and I bet she is absolutely perfect. You shouldnt give up now. Youre still young, you still have more to experience. You could try focusing more on setting out to do things for yourself, instead of worrying about finding a special companion. Bettering yourself, becoming more outgoing, and just enjoying the world you live on will all help aid in attracting a girl in the future.I hope you come to understand what Im trying to say.

Supportive

Maybe those things became less interesting, maybe you should make plans that are very specific. Instead of seeing the world or traveling to Africa, chose where in Africa and make a plan to do it.', 'Have you tried finding something you enjoy? Even if it is silly Hyperactive behavior collecting gum wrappers from gum around the world, you can find something that brings you joy and build from there. ', 'What have you tried in the past 15 years to help? ', 'Sounds Hyperactive behavior you are doing well for yourself. No idea why you would want to throw it all away.', 'What do you feel guilty about? ', 'Do you feel hopeless and thats why you want to end your life? Or are you Anger at life? Why is that you want to do it?', 'Well I cant do anything about the hug, but I will say you shouldnt be Anger at yourself, or feel hopeless. You are young, really young. You could make a difference in this world. You could help girls that deal with similar problems later in life, even if youre not changing the world you can change someones world and I promise that if you work hard enough you can do it. You are not a mistake or unwanted, you are lost, we all get lost, you may have been lost for a long time, but maybe now is the time to make a change and be strong so you can prove to those ass holes that you are worth what I think youre worth. ', 'I feel the same way you do many many many times in my life. The fact you see that youre causing Ache means you arent a dead beat. Start small, try to help out around the house or work an easy part time job. Work to make things less stressful on them. ', 'Forget doctors and meds for a second, what have you done to help improve you?

Supportive

I understand the logic of waiting till you have the resources. Its what I tell myself as well. But I wonder, living this kind of destructive life, will we ever have those resources before we get out? Your mom, mine, corrodes every little bit of good you manage to build up. For every hour your therapist gets to build you up she gets 50 to tear you down. The money and job, will you be able to get something good enough anyway while youre stewing in misery? You could just walk away, live out of a car and flip burgers until you found what youre looking for. Seems much less comfortable but it might also be much less likely to make you want to kill yourself. I spend so much time telling myself "I just need to get things in order so that I wont fail when I finally try" but I wonder if thats just a way of procrastinating and keeping myself from doing what I fear. I wonder if eventually we just have to jump without a parachute anyway. ', 'Thats the kind of insight that it seems a lot of people never obtain in a lifetime. I watch so many people grind away in Depressed mood lives and never question any of it. They roll their eyes at their own fantasies of a different life and use cliches Hyperactive behavior "thats life" and "everyone hates their job" to justify not taking the risk of letting go of the devil they know. So if running off to the forest offered even a possibility of more happiness, youd be a fool not to chase it. Maybe its everything you hope it will be, maybe it Nausea off into something better, maybe it just ends up being a needed break and you come back feeling better. I really dont see how it could go wrong given how you feel now. No one chases real happiness anymore, they all drank the koolaid, its unfortunate.As far as how, I dont know as much about it as I wish I did. I know that a lot of state and federal parks provide lodging for their employees to live on site. I once met someone that did that, just traveled the country doing ranger work in places Hyperactive behavior Yellowstone and Yosemite. Also maybe the subs Hyperactive behavior /r/homestead /r/Homesteading and /r/SelfSufficiency might be good for some ideas. Or /r/TinyHouses and drag one off to a secluded RV park. And not that its very foresty, but it is out there and lends itself to living on your own... I heard someone on a podcast talking about doing the same thing and going to live by the Salton sea because land is in the 4 digits. So theres lots of options and most of them are probably easier than the corporate life in many ways.But you dont sound Hyperactive behavior youre doing very good *today*. Whichever way you might go, it may be that none of it can be put into action quickly enough to give you the relief you need this week. So in the Irritable Mood time, maybe a therapist with an immediate opening could help blow off enough steam to keep going a little longer and have time to work on this stuff? And if I can help, drop me a pm.', 'Well, statistically speaking, I can tell you that odds are not in your favor for being able to keep yourself from acting on both the pedophilia nor the suicidal inclination. People dont just white knuckle these sorts of things and get better on their own. Having insurance puts you ahead of most, it would be unfortunate if you didnt take advantage of it. The fears you have are real, but Ventricular Dysfunction, Left untreated theres going to come a time when you find the outcome to be far worse than the risks you describe here and wish you could turn back time to redo it. Without help, youre going to end up damning your future kids to living the same life youve lived, either by having been abused or by having a father who killed himself, the psychological toll for them will be mostly the same. You can go to war now with whatever dark thing created this mess, or you can let it run its course and the Ache you feel now will echo for generations to come. Either way you have a monumental step to take. People generally choose the later because inaction seems easier, but the cost ends up being so much higher.', 'Maybe the antidepressants arent working as well as youre giving them credit for. Wouldnt it be nice if you got a little better mix and got to enjoy the things you have in your life? It sounds Hyperactive behavior you have the elements of a happy life, thats half the fight, further than a lot of us get. The second half is being able to feel the happiness from them. That takes more work and time, but it would be a shame to get this close and give up.', 'I was badly suicidal for a long time, I still might be, Im not quite sure right now. The thing that bewildered me about it was that the people that knew how close to dying I was, would over and over again let me walk out of the room when I could have very well been going off to kill myself. Some just didnt care, the rest... I get that its a hard subject for them. "What do I say? What can I do? Is it any of my business? It would be too awkward. Im sure itll be ok anyway" And they would play russian roulette by leaving me alone and I would go sit under a noose and wonder why they cared so little that theyd rather let me die than help. So having seen it from that side, I think that if the roles were ever reversed and I thought someone I loved was at risk of dying, I would move heaven and earth to help them, right now. Id put my whole life on hold, handcuff myself to them figuratively, maybe literally, call everyone that could possibly help. Because nothing could be worse than saying "well try tomorrow" and then finding her dead tomorrow.But, you know, my situation probably resulted in that overkill mentality. As it is, if youre in college there are counselors for this, a lot of students get Depressed mood and suicidal. There are community mentally health organizations (not my favorite option), hospitals with psych units (probably not her favorite option, but 72 hours inpatient and doctors that can pull out the big guns might be what it takes. You could plead to her parents, its not Hyperactive behavior they could have any more disdain anyway and it might scare them into action. And if nothing else just do things to keep her mind off it until you can get more help. Because sitting and stewing in your Mental Depression is how you go from looking up things online to actually doing it. I hope it gets better for you guys.', 'I find myself conflicted about giving this advice, but if I can help you, I can help your family. So as for your fears of being reported. Find someone you Hyperactive behavior and can talk to about the anxiety, Mental Depression and Suicide. Then when you can trust them and get a feel for how they think, send an anonymous letter from a PO box or an email saying that you would Hyperactive behavior to become a client and receive counseling for the pedophilia but explain your worries and ask for their policy. Its possible they could lie just to get you to come forward but thats why you get to know them first with the Mental Depression help. If their policy eases your fears, then you can come forward in your next meeting and tell them it was you who sent the email.', 'Try to remember that being surrounded by horrible people can warp your perception of the future and make you belive things you otherwise wouldnt. Theyre shoveling crap onto a pile faster than you can dig yourself out of it. In a few months you could take yourself away from it and have none of that negative input. Your feelings about life and the future could literally change overnight, or at least very quickly. I think it would be a shame not to get to try that, as long as you can clench your teeth and get through the next 3 months', 'I used to know that person. It was a surreal feeling to feel that someone else in your head was out to get you. I felt that I was my conscious mind, and my sub conscious mind was an entity of its own that hated me. I used to plead with him "just give me a break today and you can make the next 7 Chest Pain all you want." He always ignored me. Im not completely better now by any means, but I am just enough that I dont feel Hyperactive behavior that anymore. Ive spent so much time analyzing it too that it starts to make better sense. Youve been Chest Pain and damaged by the people around you for so long that everything is a mess, and the mind needs to find a cause for the damage, something has to be to blame. But the people that did the damage have trained you with bad self esteem to not blame them. And even if you try to blame yourself it doesnt quite fit because on some level you know you wouldnt do this to yourself. But theres no where else to point the finger, and your bad self esteem also makes you want to blame yourself anyway, so you split yourself and blame him. Hes not real, hes just a defense mechanism to try to explain the pain.As far as being diagnosed and told youll have to learn to live with something. I think thats a cop out that some people Hyperactive behavior to use because they dont see the long view. Theres no reason to have to learn to live with any of this stuff, Hyperactive behavior I said it the other post, you werent born broken, anything thats broken now can be fixed given enough time and effort. Its not easy, but its not permanent, you were trained to be Hyperactive behavior this, you can untrain yourself with some help. Getting a therapist to be a voice of reason can help a lot. Once you find the right one, you can have someone there to say all of the helpful things that should have been said all along but werent. A Depressed mood mind cant fix itself by itself, its been stepped on for so long that it only knows one way of thinking, which is why Suicide ends up looking Hyperactive behavior such a good answer.', 'The lack of intimacy is the part that makes you think divorce is looming but not the gun thing? Youve been sober 2 years and married just over 2, so you met and married while you were still in your addiction, was he as well? Is he still? How can you hope to get better if at best youre still surrounded by damaging things or at worst, surrounded by THE damaging things that caused it. The fact that youve stayed sober through it is extraordinary. Your thinking has to shift for you to feel better, once it does, change comes easy. The fine print of course is that shifting your thinking is one of the most difficult things a person can do, doubly so when its still tied to the things that created it. You need a sponsor, they are infinitely more insightful in dealing with these problems than we can be and it gives you someone to act as a solid, trustworthy base point that it sounds Hyperactive behavior you need. As a bonus, working the 12 steps is a good way to be able to lessen the temptation to drink and really heal rather than just white knuckle it. Groups would also be great people to build a friend base out of and depending on where you live you can find one happening almost every day. You could go tonight, and they would be delighted if you showed up and asked for help in your time of need. Good luck, I hope things start to get better for you.', '>in a thread where a mans life and livelihood is at stake. Other than charge into this thread with profanity and insults, I seem to have missed where you gave a single helpful suggestion to the OP. You must be working on that reply now though, Im sure in all of your eloquent glory.', 'My story was much of the same. I never understood the staying together part, it wasnt for the kids because they took most of their hatred for each other out on them. Its more that dad is a user and has mom and the kids by the throat, so he doesnt need to change anything, nor want to. Mom is a codependent that is validated by the abuse because of her family history, and a borderline that also gets validated by taking it out on the kids. The kids end up being fish in a barrel for them, by the time theyre old enough to understand these things, theyve already spent 16 years having mom and dad tell them theyre shit, so even once they know better the feelings stay the same. No ones self esteem survives that and Mental Depression is inevitable. Of the many kids in my family, all of them are broken and half are suicidal. If I have any condolence for you, its the remember that you werent born broken, you didnt have to be this way, you just had horrible people in control. If you can get away from them, after a while of not having them shoveling more crap on the pile, your mentality will change. Living with them is why it seems so futile. For every hour of work you do with a therapist or on your own, they get 23 to tear you back down. Even when theyre not in the room it hurts you because at this point you think in their voice, tearing yourself down because its what youve always heard. If you could get a few years of distance from it, that voice would fade. Its not easy of course, going out on your own while being broken, but then getting to Suicide isnt easy either. I hope you can give yourself a little more time to try to save it.', 'I think a lot of suicidal people would give anything to have the sort of parents you described. Wed be able to go to them, tell them we were absolutely about to give up, and have them take over and help us Hyperactive behavior rational loving people can. Have you tried that? I think it would be a shame to leave without at least giving them that chance.', 'The fact that this hurts you so much means that youll be the kind of parent that the world desperately needs more of. It would be sad to lose one of the few we have.Im on the adoption bandwagon. I always felt that adopted children are a little luckier than others. You end up knowing for certain that your parents wanted you so much that they went out looking for you. That they jumped through all kinds of legal hoops and paperwork to make sure they could have you and you werent just an accident or a midlife pressure decision.Also, and I know this isnt any help when youre feeling bad, but 25 is young too. Im 29 and feel bad about being alone but I still dont think I would have kids now if I could. Id rather wait till 35 and be sure my mental cement is all dried first so that I can do a good job and give them the happiness I missed out on.', 'Depression is sort of the absence of hope. I think most people run on a lot of hope without realizing it. A little bit of hope for something on the weekend, looking forward to a paycheck, knowing they will get some enjoyment at work tomorrow, planning what they are going to do after work, looking forward to seeing a loved one or working on a hobby. Normal people are fueled by dreams of the future. For Depressed mood people that all dries up. Today Chest Pain, yesterday Chest Pain, the day before that Chest Pain... I dont have any hope that tomorrow will feel good. The weekend will feel the same as the weekdays, all of the little nice things that happen along the way wont be enough for me to feel anything about them. Everything turns to grey and with that comes profound sadness. Its Hyperactive behavior walking down a road too foggy to see in front of yourself, youre pretty sure there isnt anything ahead either, its just you, standing in the fog hurting. And you keep going because everyone says you have to, so you go another month and find that its still you standing in the fog and hurting, a little further down the road. You know whats going to happen next month now, you cant hope for anything different.If I could give one piece of advice to someone worrying they might be Depressed mood, its "Dont wait." Throw everything you can at it as hard as you can and as soon as you can. Therapists, medication, exercise, meditation, forcing yourself to do things, everything. Its Hyperactive behavior a cancer that just gets worse the longer you stew in it until youre so broken that you cant be put back together at all.

Indicator

Have you been on the same meds for the past 5 years? Therapists can offer you some good coping strategies go help you deal with the situation yourself during difficult times, but in my experience, some of them just plain suck. Finding a good one isnt the easiest thing. ', 'Let your child be the reason for you to keep going. Your child hasnt had a say into whether or not they would Hyperactive behavior to live. Please do not do this. Please try to push on. If you broke up with him it means you have respect for yourself, and part of you wants to live, and believes there is hope. There are so many things that can go wrong during pregnancy, so it is always a miracle when a baby makes it this far. Things will get better for you. ', 'Are you aware that there are other treatments? Therapy and meds are not the only option. ', 'Please pm me or something. Let me know that youre still alive. Give some sort of a response. Give an indication youre still alive. There are people out there who care.', 'Is money the issue? Because although it would help, therapy and western medicine isnt the only option.', 'Answer me please, tell me what treatment you have gotten for feeling this way? You are not alone. I have been where you are many times. ', 'Good psychs are really hard to find. But they do exist. Might I suggest, look around for any Buddhist centres/temples in your city, see if you can go to a group session to learn meditation from a Buddhist monk/guru. ', 'Thank you kindly silentlyundying', 'OP is posting to Suicide watch. She is clearly feeling hopeless. OP is after support, not criticism. I would give you support too if you were in the same situation. ', 'I know exactly how you feel brother. It certainly does feel as though nobody cares sometimes in my situation too. Please tell me, have you undergone any treatment at all?

Indicator

Thank you, plenty of people tell me Im not a failure.But you see, I cannot convince myself of that. I cannot see life as anything but some kind of twisted contest in which Im lagging behind. I cannot forgive myself for not, well, living as a child and teenager. I never did anything, Ive wasted talents, threw away opportunities, ignored chances.And now Im 22, Ive failed three college courses since I graduated Drug abuse school at 16. I have no notable skills, nothing that makes me worth a damn. Meanwhile my partner can unicycle, facepaint, sew a little, plays multiple instruments somewhat and piano rather well, has attended multiple festivals and concerts, knows a metric fuckton about music, has a lot of knowledge in general and she even talked about doing volunteer work this summer. And shes goddamn 17.And here I am, 22 and barely fucking anything can be said about me. I cant enjoy life because I dont love those things. They feel neutral and gray as does anything else. New things I dont dare to try because Id fail them anyway, Ive failed everything else I tried so far. I just tried juggling again but it just made me angry. I drew yesterday but it just made me growl.And I cant forgive myself for that nor do I see any proof of that changing.', 'Im actually decent-ish at drawing, considering that in total Ive been doing it for a few months. But Im getting zero fulfillment out of it. The same counts with archery and juggling but also more passive things Hyperactive behavior movies and videogames. Nothing I do is good enough, I cannot live up to other people. And I shouldnt want to live up to other people but I cant shake that feeling. I should want to do things for myself, live for myself, but everything I do is to fish for recognition, achievements and admiration.And indeed Ive talked about this with my partner. But I dont want her to see me as a student, nor do I want to see her as a teacher. Im so vain, I want to be at least her equal. But Ill never be. I hate feeling this way, hate comparing us Hyperactive behavior this. I Chest Pain myself so much, constantly, and I cant stop it.As for throwing my potential away, if I kill myself I wont exactly notice. The struggle will be over and Ill be gone. ', 'I have long since had the sickening realization that Id probably enjoy it more if Id be better at it than most people. But you know whats worse? I also know that thats probably not true. Id still see people who would be better than me and feel crap about that.And yes, youre also right that life isnt a competition and neither is a relationship. She wouldnt look down on me, I know she wouldnt. Heck she doesnt look down on me now.But I do. I expect myself to be perfect. I look down on myself for being Hyperactive behavior this. I look down upon myself for being so awfully inferior in everything.

Ideation

If the university counselling service was rubbish then a) tell them so -how else are they going to know? and b) try somewhere else. Your GP should be a good place to start.', 'The trouble with Suicide is that it is so bloody final! Just because you have tried hard to get better and it hasnt been sucessful yet doesnt Irritable Mood that you will never feel better. What a shame it would be if you killed yourself now and a cure for your problems would have presented itself in the near future.You say that you have a history of mental illness so Ill assume that you regularly see a doctor. Have you tried discussing your suicidal feelings with him or her? ', 'I think you probably need to get some medical help. Not a lot of what you are saying makes sense and if you think about it its probably far more likely that your past mental health problems are reoccurring than a Anger relative has it in for you.', 'Why do you want it then? I strongly suspect that you are rationalising your feelings rather than really analysing anything. ', 'You know that feeling of being really scared? If you can overcome it and tell your parents anyway then you you will have made a huge step forwards. Brave people arent fearless. They have the fear but do it anyway. You could try showing them this post initially. Once you get it off your chest , that alone should make you feel a whole lot better. They love you right? So theyll want to help you.', 'No I never said leave her for someone new. I said leave her. Shes bad for you and going to make you feel worse. ', 'If talking isnt working then you need to try something else. Why not try saying "this isnt working for me" to a doctor and see what other options are available.', 'Who are they? Your family?', 'Youre not going to Hyperactive behavior this but you really need to leave her. Shes not good for you. As for your own Mental Depression - talk to your parents and or a doctor. Depression in teens is a common problem but it isnt necessarily a life sentence. You can feel better if you get some help.

Supportive

I sincerely hope you are still there. I know this might not help much but please try to hang in there. You might not be able to change everything bad in your life, but there are things you can change once you, hopefully, get the energy. I have a hard time relating to your specific situation, but having taken a pill overdose I know what desperately wanting to die feels Hyperactive behavior. It might look hopeless wherever you look, but life is almost always worth it. Just give yourself another couple years to reevaluate, or try to, it might help. I wish and hope the best for you. You deserve to be happy and have a good life just as much as everyone else. :)', 'Im very glad to hear that and it sounds Hyperactive behavior you also have your husbands support, which is great! A plan definitely sounds good. While you may not feel better now, it may come later once you start getting the help you need. Again, I hope the best for you and your family!', 'Do you have any friends or family whose house you can go to right now? To me it sounds Hyperactive behavior you could use some time away. That being said I really hope youre better now and as much as it may suck to hear this; Im glad you didnt die and though you may not think so, Im sure you dad would be/is as well. You need to get some help, so is there anyone close to you, you feel that you can talk to and possibly help you? ', 'Its hard to find out what to say when you say that talking wont help anymore. What is making you feel Hyperactive behavior this? ', 'Im glad to hear you found some help. As for the so-glad-Im-alive phase? Itll probably be a long time. Its been a year for me since I survived my Suicide attempt and Im still not there. There are a few days every once in a while were I appreciate it but mostly I feel the same as you, Hyperactive behavior being apathetic and carefree. How are you feeling today though? ', 'I know it may not help a lot to hear this, but if you set your mind to it and try (once youre ready) it will get better. Ive been there myself so I know what the darkness and hopelesness feels Hyperactive behavior, but it can get better. I hear you believe that no one will ever want you because of your mistakes, but that is far from the truth, and anyone who would discard you based on your past is simply not even worth it. Again, it may not help much but i genuinely hope you will get better. I believe in you, and I believe that you can fix this and get back up on your feet. Breakups are tough and you sound devastated, but I believe that you can get better eventually and with enough determination. How are you feeling otherwise?

Attempt

And Id rather you live, and get a happy life. just try. please', 'People will miss you, no matter what you think. Youre willing to make a man a murder, for doing his job, because youre Exhaustion of your friends? MAKE NEW FRIENDS. I know, sounds fucking hard, but it can happen, dont have a job? go work at a place Hyperactive behavior Walmart, you will meet so many people. have a job? on the weekends, go for a jog in the park, or through a dog park. you will meet people. go to the local uni or college bar, (if of age), and just sit and listen. Listen to people, understand their points of interest. If you have something valuable to say, then say it. yea you might seem weird at first. but you will get the hang of it. and please dont do drugs. Im not your mother, Im not your father, Im some guy in this fucked up world that is saying, for best interest of you, dont do them. I said my two cents. how will you spend them?', 'and why not?', 'have you cut off communication to your dream girl yet? because she dosent sound Hyperactive behavior a dream girl to me. If any Disturbance in mood is willing to say, "But you will always have a place in my heart", she is either a) a bad fucking person, or b) just wants a rebound guy she can say shit to, then leave and rise and repeat. Think i could get my ex out of my head? think spending three awesome fucking years together ment fucking nothing to me? It Chest Pain a lot. but sitting in my corner Chest Pain more man. just try it. please', 'Easier on everyone? because its so easy to get over the fact someone you know commited suicide. youre right, they will never question if they could have helped, done something, anything for you not to do it. dont be that person. Stand strong and keep moving. just do it man', 'Then tell her that! of course its going to be awkward as fuck! tell her what you think, but dont fucking stand there! and yes, you can fucking move. you have two fucking legs, which is more than some people have, and they still fucking move! yea, in the begging its going to suck balls. Hyperactive behavior, a lot. but try to move. go out your door, and only think, "one foot in front of the other". not "what should I do?", or "OH SQUIRREL!" just "one foot in front of the other". You will get hungry, you will eat, eating and moving will make you Exhaustion. you will sleep. You will wake up in the morning, and say "THAT GUY ON THE WEB WAS RIGHT". and it will get better. Please, just try it, for my sake, your sake, and the sake of anyone that will read this. you can do it man. ', 'Nothing ever gets okay after someone "leaves". The only way for it to get ok is to do it youre self. yea it gets fucking hard, you just want to quit, you have no clue what will happen, you just want to check out. Waiting does nothing, moving does. anything. bars, clubs, fuck a strip show, or just walking around. you have legs, use them.', 'I agree with you that people are dumb, sorta weird and generaly a pain. But that dosent Irritable Mood you inflict physical harm on your self. As well some people might not be as bad as you think', 'And your going to let her do this to you? Thr best way to Chest Pain her back is to do well.', 'Look, I know that it seems Hyperactive behavior they pick on you for being fat and poor, but people Hyperactive behavior this, they dont care who they pick on. Im a 6ft 320 lb line man. I drive a nice car, my job allow me to purchase what I need or want. I have been and always will be bullied because my parents make more than theirs. I know what darkness feels Hyperactive behavior, I know the feeling of it only getting worse. But trust it gets so much better. These are the people who will wake up one day and realize this is the best theyre life wouldnt get any better, all down hill from here.. But you can, you have legs, start moving towards your goal. you have arms, climb or move anything is in your way. dont stop moving towards that goal, any goal. Anyone can reach something, you just have to keep saying "I have legs, I will move". And that bullshit about it being the darkest before the light is not true, its just that nobody wants to look for a flashlight. They would rather sit there and wait for it to get better rather than do anything. look for that damned flashlight man.', 'but why is it bullshit? thats what i want to know.', 'then destory it. Make a new mind. That girl, just ask her out to a movie, a dinner or fuck it bowling! You will get nothing by standing still and hoping. Fucking move! Go for a run, go to a place you have happy memories in, get a job, just dont stop. never stop moving.', 'Trust me, people are not dull, people who appear dull at first may not really be all that dull once you start talking to them ', 'Why not?', 'Stop sitting in your damn room. Go to a pub, talk a walk in the park, hell go see a Depressed mood local band for all the fucks I give, but do something where there are other people around. talk to them, nothing creepy Hyperactive behavior "I know where you live", or some shit Hyperactive behavior that, but ask "Are these guys any good?" if at a cheap or free band thing, or if at a dog park, say "what a cute little puppy/dog." point is, sitting in your room makes everything worse. trust me, at home thats all I can do till I get back to Uni. ', 'Lair. you want help, why else post this here of all places! the place where people try to make others not do things that will effect the world? And you know what, yea i get it, women are horrible things sometimes. I loved my GF of three years to death. What do you think happened to me when I found out she was pergo with another mans child? Think I fucking said, "OH well thats sad". I went to a dark place. But then one day, I was on youtube, when i say a video. a simple video really, just about how one car that slows or stops, can affect all traffic in the area. I realized, Im that car. So what, shes dumb, she isnt taking you, ask her about a friend she has that might be single. either she will find you a friend, or she will tell you what she really thinks of you. Youre giving up in the second round of a fight! Youve already went through the first round, why not see how far you can go? and if you are puking, Ginger ale did the trick for me at least. At least think about this. Please.

Ideation

this is a sad story for sure and I am telling you now from someone who came from some messed up stuff as a kid..I dont feel Hyperactive behavior sharing on here and it had to do with my mother as well...she Ventricular Dysfunction, Left when I was 15 and I thought things would get better and the woman my dad started dating was worse (Again you dont know my story just know it was fucked) I had to leave because I could not handle living there under that roof I had barely any money and thought it was going to be terrible...It wont be you are so young and I want you to know now that you are on your own learn to love yourself and start a life that you want you are now in control do you know how good that will feel...also become what your mother is not and as hard as it is forget what she has done to you she is a piece of shit she wants you to fail on your own she thinks she has set you up for it DONT FAIL its going to be hard but keep on going..also your little Disturbance in mood sister saying "we will be so good when you are gone" wrong you will be so good they will have no one to attack anymore and just you wait your mother will turn on your sister its all she is used to bullying someone...As for this bf of yours lose him you cant Anxiety about someone who doesnt care enough to treat you how you deserve..sometimes you need to be alone to find yourself :) Please please try as hard as you can to see the good in this you are out no more of your mothers attacks

Indicator

Dony worry. Seriosuly. Misdemeanors get expunged all the time, and thats assuming the charges arent dropped. Hang in there. You need friends? You got one. PM me.', 'What do you do to pass the time? If its boredom thats fucking with you Ive been there. Seriously sunk in it. Im a bit better now, PM me if you wanna talk, perhaps only for the novelty of it. ', 'School is shit, and then its over. It will be over, but death never will. Please PM me, we can have Skype if youd like.', 'Everyones got shit. Ive helped shovel my fair share, as others have shoveled mine. Thats humanity. We stick together to make it work, and Im happy youve posted here to prove it. PS: You wanna talk, PM me. I have a backhoe of a shit shoveller.

Supportive

Ive lost a lot of motivation over the last few months, I really just need a break. If I could get over the idea of upcoming bills and put my head down Im sure I could get somewhere. Sadly its never as simple as that.', 'Thats what Im holding onto Im not sure I could handle anything happening to them.

Indicator

Have you talked to anyone about? Like brought it to your command or medical? Maybe you have seen someone bring these thoughts to medical as a corpsman? I was at Camp Lejeune for a little while too a long time ago..', 'I think the worst part is I just feel Hyperactive behavior quiting. I want to quit. I know I have children but sometimes I feel Hyperactive behavior they and my soon to be ex-wife will be better off without me. That the only thing I can do is kill myself so that they will get my death gratuity, life insurance, and VA benefits... Im almost at the point where I dont care what happens to my career I just want this Ache to end. Im afraid to admit that if I did have a gun in my house I might have already done it already. Wow, I have never told that to anyone before. But I guess that is the truth about how I feel right now. Thank you for the comments, I honestly didnt expect even this many replies.

Ideation

You cant really pretend to be that which you are not, not for long, not convincingly. If Mr. Cool is IN you, it IS you, its that the other part is too. Need to get them congruent.', 'Odd, that, so am I - alcoholic and sedative/hypnotic addict. Dont know what you know about those, but we dont get over that. If hes started again, he needs to deal with it immediately. If it continues it will be a very short trip to conditions worse than the last time he was able to quit. Ive had friends who were sober for years, in a couple of cases decades, who started up again and bottomed out in weeks to a few months. Some of them couldnt get back.EDIT: One of the hallmarks is at the worst possible time.', 'Got kicked out of HS at the start of my senior year (mother finally ran away from dad, I quit going to classes). GEDd in Air Force. After get sober and starting to work in the treatment field tried to go to school at the same time, got about 3 years worth, Nixon closed down the program I was working at so had to find another job, got into school there, got the total hours for BS but couldnt get the last 30hrs from the same school, as couldnt take day classes due to job. End result is about 136 hrs undergrad, 21 post grad - no paper, dont count. That paper would be about another $10k/year in salary, and a bit easier to convince employers to hire. But, didnt happen, at least, not yet.', 'Youre 19 (I was once too, briefly), it often goes with the territory. You write Hyperactive behavior one who may not have made many friends yet, in a new place. If I were redoing my major mistakes I think one of the more significant is I would have tried harder to find and make some better friends. I lone-wolfed it too much. There are those who say just do your own thing - sometimes it takes friends to help find out what that is.', 'Not a prob. Make sure you dont get talked out of the hospital idea, and, while there, you might mention the drinking. Very few situation that cant make worse. ', 'I came into the fellowship in Lincoln in 1971. About 3-5 weeks after that Labor Day, and no one knows for sure exactly when (nobody involved ever thought I would make it, including me, so no one tracked, kept notes - we tried to put a time on it later) I came into some unemployment money and took the bus up to Omaha to look for a job, which I did for a couple hours. Turns out I had to try one more time, see if this lost control concept really applied to me. It did, my last two-day drunk. Went back to Lincoln and Hope and slunk back in, hoping no one would notice. They pretended not to. That was the final nail. Was time to really, fully listen up or die.The groups I came into had no problem with alternative concepts of higher power, actually encouraged searching for that one could live with. Everything from G)ood O)rderly D)irection out to yoga and more (this was the 70s, when the 60s really happened). As long as it was working - didnt matter, didnt care.Most will return to something on the order of their birth religions, and I have absolutely no problem with that at all, for that individual, but that is NOT a requirement, and alternative thinking in those areas becoming more common at the individual level. The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking**.**That little dot at the end of that line is a period.EDIT: Forgot the original question! This is my 39th year.', 'We didnt even bother with it. Waited for 7. So far thats going fairly well. I do IT support for a very vertical market software house. Tried to get on as programmer, but they liked my hardware background better, so its mostly server/desktop and telephone support. Good company, 16 years (Novell then), longest Ive ever been at the same job. ', 'The sister could be a starting place, but, if you can maintain some cool at all, you should probably get at least the parent most likely to listen involved soon also. By maintain cool I Irritable Mood you do not have to say in any direct fashion you think youre suicidal, maybe just beginning a conversation about almost anything and then bend it as gradually as appropriate into youre worried about a few things and maybe they should help you find a resource (counselor, shrink) to aid in getting things sorted. ', 'What are you doing to cultivate friends?What are you doing to find and get involved with local support groups?(Your hospital should have referred you to some. If they didnt, call and remind them.)What are you doing to take control of your own life?', 'Its survivable, if you allow it to be. Life can go on, and well, if you dump the drugs. Question is, are you going to do that? Its hard, in the extreme - many dont, and dont make it.Do you have a plan and/or resources to help get and stay clean?FWIW: This is my 39th year (alcoholic/sedative-hypnotic {sleeping pills}) addict.', 'There is also the matter you recognize of how such act would affect your family. That seems to matter to you. Thats good.Much of dealing with depressions Hyperactive behavior yours is buying time, as time allows opportunity for finding better answers, and those better answers do exit. Generally they are not found in drugs though, or in staying alone. Not staying alone is something you can do something about. Your school probably has a counseling service, check into it.', 'You sure were not related? Thats sort of what my daughter did, after Oberlin went to Europe for about three months. Later on, got her masters. Wont get the Ph.D., doesnt want to teach. She had a ball in Europe.', 'Odd, that. I was almost 19 before a girl found me worth the time.Anyhow, 18 way too soon to be making a Ventricular Dysfunction, Left turn at Thursday, Friday or next week or next month something interesting could happen. That, and a real fear of dying is part of what helped me keep looking during the worst year of my life, when I almost did die, more than a few times, 1969-1970.Sometimes I get lucky, found some people who could help me quit doing most of the damage to myself, helped teach me how to get out of my own road.Those kinds of people still out there, just have to look for them. ', 'Any common friends you can check with?', 'All well and good, but should also lead rather directly to getting some kind of face-to-face going locally. I want them in front of someone, quickly.', 'What I was hoping for - I m not an every things coming up roses kind of guy, I know things can go bad, but I also know they can get better. I presume your name is a throw-away, mine isnt. Also [email protected] (I know, but Im old, and its a first love kinda thing).', 'Unless the HIPA regs have changed your parents would only know that you were being seen, not about what. Id suggest continuing the therapy. Soon, Hyperactive behavior Monday. These kinds of things are not likely to solve over the web, you need face-to-face.', 'My oldest daughter, neuropharmacy. at Oberlin. Works for Amgen now. I was better at physics, but kinda threw it away. Now I wash Windows.', 'Got sorta Anger for a bit the first time I was told this, but, theres a logic to it: Loneliness is mostly a self-imposed condition. The upside is, that can be changed. ', 'Both warranted. Ever considered checking out Al-Anon and/or ACOA? The Al-Anon idea applies to your mother also.', 'You have a long history with this kind of thing, with efforts made to make better. Obviously it will not be easy, or youd already be fixed. Its hard, not arguing that, and I dont know what your answer will be or where or how you will find it, but I think you should keep looking - I did: http://www.reddit.com/r/reddit.com/comments/da2yk/unintended_consequences_jerrys_mda/', 'Cant address all of this, not going to try. A couple though worthy of comment.I - Youre 18, there are just some things that are part of that territory, for almost every one: a) Excessive Sweating - done there, been that. Got about 4-5 more years of that to contend with - normal. b) Acne scars - I didnt learn to leave them along either - check. c) Balding - you should see my son. I have it too, but better excuse now (64 y.o.) II - Nut Chest Pain? Thats a doctor issue - see one, if he doesnt find out why, see another. (For a drug addict/alcoholic, doctor shopping not usually a good idea, for nearly all other issues, is. I was able to avoid 3 months incapacitation by shopping for a doctor who could offer a newer, better technique for repairing my abdominal aortic Aneurysm - 3 days on back, back to work in 5 days.)III Social Skills, lack of: Consider a formal dance class (Arther Murray, similar). Many offer one-2-one for shy people, if you get lucky the right class can be a door opener.You have lots of party-time ahead of you, once you get yourself ready for it.Your self worth is not set in stone at 13-16, actually, its never set in stone. My wife was never a saint, neither was I. She just did better with not being one.http://www.reddit.com/r/self/comments/b9jfa/this_is_where_we_can_put_personal_things_and_i/', 'Suicidal thoughts are not normal, even under stress. Some Mental Depression episodes can be short term and situational, but this doesnt read Hyperactive behavior that. Its probably a good idea to find a counseling service and get a qualified professional evaluation, see what they think.', 'For Phobia, Social drinkers alcohol can enhance the given situation, if it does much more than that for you, kind of a red flag. Might be best to wait on getting into drinking until your other concerns are sorted.Alcohol in fire for effect mode almost always works - in the beginning. Thats the problem.', 'If people turn to you for such, you might consider, later, when feeling better, to develop that. That is a characteristic that few have, and being that kind of person (one turned to) could do some good in this world should you choose to.', 'She got into micro-brewing/distilling as a result of that trip. Her current hobby is making/selling a local brand of gin - seems to be going well at the moment, they have area restaurants buying.Kind of odd, almost paradoxical, in view of my history, but sometimes the universe likes its little jokes.', 'Find some way to get some more friends - thats probably the root of this anyway. I know that writes easier than it works, and I know it much better than you might think, but its doable. Others do it, you can learn. Im not that good at it myself, but I eventually got lucky - you can too. One or two fairly good ones, maybe one of the opposite/complimentary orientation, and much of your Mental Depression might start to fade.You start by trying to be one.', 'I didnt read as suicidal - "Im going to kill myself". I read as existential - "What am I doing here?"', 'As an additional thought, try dropping the I believe thing, and its inverse for a while.> "I dont believe that shit works" and a part of me believes it. First off, because that shit does work for many; and second, perhaps as important, where are you now due to this position? If your Mental Depression, if thats what it turns out to be, should be of a biochem nature, meds can and often do help (the right meds, not any drug you can find on the street). If your issues are a function of your thinking, well, thats where your current beliefs have brought you.There is hope in that, if my issues are a function of my thinking, that is something I can change - IOW, you can get better.', 'That may be different, dont know what he did. I had to get away from my first wife and the kids because even as screwed up as I was I knew I was (at that time) the most dangerous conceivable threat to them, both physically and psychologically. By the time I got my shit together too much time had past for me to try to re-insert myself. My own dad maybe somewhat similar to yours, screwed over me big time, in many ways - but - also did some good things, and once in a very real way directly saved my life, and, in his own, somewhat screwed up way, loved me. As much as he despised formal education, he also is the one who actually got me to read. He hated books, for the most part, but he made sure I could read, and I did. ', 'Your school remark suggests your in the 20-ish age range, plus/minus a couple. Your girlfriend broke up with you. Welcome to the 20s.I was 18, she was my first real girlfriend, and love. I was a medic in the Air Force, she was in nursing school. She was waaay out of my league. After about a year I was afraid my craziness would get in her road, so I broke up with her. Tossed the ring into the Anacostia River walking back to the bus stop to go back to base, running into trees I couldnt see for crying.Oh, you still here? About two years later we got married. Three kids.Think about it. ', 'Already answered to the best of my ability in this setting, yours not working right. The absolute shortest answer: the purpose of life is to live.These might give clues, but the better step would be to find a therapist experienced with this. The planet needs working minds.http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Existential_crisishttp://www.wikihow.com/Deal-with-an-Existential-Crisis', 'I was the Inpatient Program Coordinator for a Chemical Dependency Treatment Program for 15 years. Suicide is rampant in that population. Many developing an Drug craving come out of a family with similar history, often in a very long chain. I cant tell you because I no longer remember the count, but the percentage of my patients dealing with the aftermath of a relatives Suicide decades later was high, somewhere north of 20%.The operative phrase here is decades later. Your life is NOT that insignificant to some.', 'I cant answer that for you. Dont know that anyone else can. It may be that some kind of more formal, more professional guidance could assist, help find out why your survive button stuck. Live long is built into the system, into the fabric of the DNA, youre overriding somehow. That likely will take some directed investigation to figure out. ', 'If I had not been able to change some of my thinking I would have died forty years ago, within the first week or so after Labor Day 1970, and yes I can be that specific about it.For me most of the changing was a function of learning things I didnt know, or, and as or more importantly, knew **wrong**. Things I believed as firmly as believing the sun will come up.Around the right people, and with the right resources, its doable. (The right varies, depending on issues. Mine is alcoholism/drug addiction.)', 'Seriously, again, ditch the booze, at least during this period. That aspect I know something about, more than you and more most others here. (Sober 39 years, in the Chemical Dependency Treatment field for 20, ran Inpatient program for 15). You can be Phobia, Social on tonic water w/Roses lime juice or other soft drink to your taste. Believe it or not, most others really dont care that much what youre holding in your hand.Let your friends in on whats going on. If theyre friends, they probably know the basics anyway, they may not know how you feel about it and how youre being affected by it. IOW; some heart-to-hearts with at least some of them.Review your own history, and not the down-shot part. Your history demonstrates youre capable enough, youve just let the rather serious dings recently get to you. Your friends can help you get your mo-jo back, if you let them.', 'You sound it need of a meeting. You dont say what your drug(s) was/were, but theres a 12-Step Group for it - find one. There you can find people with similar backgrounds and experiences who have (and are now) dealing with similar issues, and finding ways.Good luck, but better luck happens when you work for it.', 'You going to be O.K. for a while? I kinda need to get some Hypersomnia in, need to be at work in the morning to make sure some phone changes I made took. Ill be able to check back from time-to-time, I normally check Reddit couple/three times an hour or so during the day.', 'Without specifics not much to work with, but, as long as youre alive you havent lost everything. Cant say I was in your boat, as I dont know what your boat is, but I did get to a point where breathing was all I had Ventricular Dysfunction, Left. Any of the few friends I had were either disgusted with me, hated me, or both; had lost three careers, could not get a job any more; lost a wife and three children, and lost about 40 pounds in six months. This time of year, esp. this year, I find myself reflecting on that era - often. Between about August to the end of August the next year I tee-totally crashed and burned - burned out, and almost died. Had zero - zip - nada - nothing at all, except a small dash of luck. I finally got Social fear enough to ask for help, and got some. NEXT September I will have been sober for 40 years. I know others, some with other issues, whove done similar after being in similar places.Sometimes anything is found again, if we can reach out for it. ', 'Dont know that there are any absolute answers, but getting him out of that house, permanently, might be a start. Too much negative reinforcement there, and associated long established behaviors. How to do that, though, thats the rub. Hes got to start not wanting to be that way. ', 'Kinda my point. After I year sober I decided to see if I could do some payback, got into the treatment field (alcoholism/chemical dependency). Did some good, was a better educator than therapist (that people identification/rapport thing), but both educators/therapists needed. ', 'Not on topic, but putting out the words you are on a phone - well - Im still trying to get my head around that. I thought my granddaughter was good, youre unreal. Thats a complement. I can barely get one sentence out at a time on that thing.;-<)}', 'Kinda depends on which end of your life the hell part occurs, doesnt it? Many, probably more than you think, have periods, sometimes extended periods, of the shits, complete and total personal misery, but then, by different routes, come out of it - Hyperactive behavior me. 65 now, should have died at 26. (Well, a few other times too, but the period of about 23 to 26 was mostly me doing it.)', 'Drop in in here - might find something: http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=12+step+programs+list+marijuana&aq=f&aqi=&aql=&oq=&gs_rfai=', 'This seem to be more philosophy (lack of) than SW, have you checked over there? ', 'Its been catching on for a few years now. I guess my bringing it up was sometimes the future goes off in directions un-anticipated. She tracked me down about 10 years ago, mainly to cuss me out, and more, but wanted my explanation first. I gave it to her, in detail. She (and the other two) kinda got it, and understood, and forgave. She calls me dad again. So do the other two. ', 'Not arguing that, and not arguing at all, just including. My goal is to work them towards a body in their area.', 'Could you give an idea as to how you are being Chest Pain, turned on? Might be a clue on how someone might assist in your thinking. I found a lot of my issues were in fact MY issues, I was thinking squirrelly. I didnt know that, cause I was doing the thinking, but others were able show me, in my head, some of my thought errors, and provide some perspective and ideas how to correct.And I missed my point - much better for my problems to be my errors, me I can learn how to fix. ', 'Will save that discussion for another day, no more a willpower issue than for one Dermatitis, Allergic Contact to penicillin or similar taking steps to avoid it. Can be an issue of wont power though. Im a genetic drunk, and have the pre-drinking evidence to support that. My body and brain dont behave the same way normals do, and never has. Just took me almost 20 years to learn that. Doesnt apply to all, you can make the grade without it, but having it makes it soooo much easier, quicker, deadlier. ', 'Check PM', 'Good luck.', 'Say thank you, and gift them out to others (maybe by swapping and gifting to those two, gift 1 to gifter 2, gift 2 to gifter 1).', 'Good luck, find some friends - these kinds of things hard to deal with with help, damn near impossible without.', 'Ive had lucky spells and events. Almost every job Ive ever had, only one exception, I got paid for doing something I liked to do. This is about my 6th career, probably last. Not bad for a guy with no eddykashun.', 'It wouldnt Chest Pain for him to check out Al-Anon, esp. since he still professes care for the jerk. Conceivably could, over time, help both.', 'Something missing - why does she have to go? What did she do?', 'Not much, may help some, but first - Recommend very strongly stay away from booze for a while, maybe a long while. Dont know your family history, but I suspect it wouldnt take long to find another drunk or three in the woodpile. Youre a setup for a path similar to your mothers.On to the issue, the thing that will actually help the most is time, we have to find bridges until that occurs. Staying, or trying to stay artificially preoccupied with make work types of diversions wont cut it.Do you have any remaining friends, and I Irritable Mood friends, not just people you know? ', 'A concept that morphed and developed over time, still is to some extent, but - the group(s) themselves. There is a Common Shared Wisdom there, at least for me.My family collected religions, various Christian denominations, in periodic attempts to deal with complications of their own unrecognized alcoholism (they just sometimes drank a little too much, Hyperactive behavior, daily - always building over weeks to months to a crisis of some kind). A blowout point would be reached, and into a church somewhere, the last being Catholic. A side effect of this was I really didnt have a proper diaper religion. When my head got clear enough to start thinking AA might have some answers for me, where most start actually trying to understand this work the steps thing, and coming to terms with the obvious - my own thinking wasnt working - I started researching religions, in some detail, I didnt want to fuck up again and pick the wrong one.My research did not lead to a religion I could believe in, and actually took apart many of the few beliefs in those areas I already held.Concurrent to that research on religions I was also investigating AA itself - a bunch of primarily nobodies, rejects and failures, ex-cons, ex- and current preachers, priests, doctors, nurses, maids, millionaires, who had learned to stop Depressed mood themselves and others. A shared experience and knowledge-base of tricks of the trade, and so much more.[Add to that they saved, very literally, my life when no one else would even try any more](http://www.reddit.com/r/reddit.com/comments/da2yk/unintended_consequences_jerrys_mda/), it just kind of made sense to me. Still does. ', 'Whats your MTA (normally, name of nearest large city)?', 'Something to consider - before trying to eat a pill sandwich with wine chaser, wait for another reported Suicide, and visit the funeral, see how much better off the attendees are. See if they think they are relieved.I have reason to suspect few will be.', 'Work on the support group thing - its likely to be worth the effort. Not the same problem, but I was working on killing myself in a slightly indirect fashion at an age I guess to be no more than 5-6 years older than you are now. A support group helped, a lot. That was 39 years ago.', 'Hey, you got a death wish, you got one - just didnt read that way to me. Still reads more Hyperactive behavior you cant figure out why live?, to me a different animal. I do suspect investigation in that area might be more productive.Cant give you an answer, all find their own if they havent bought the ones fed them. Dont know for sure what my reasons for living are, except general nosiness and not wanting to die. Have likely come closer to dieing than most here, but want no part of it, hence still here.Should have died at 10, 17, 19, 24, 25/6 (second closest, most aware) 34, 62 and last year. Decided not to. ', 'How many thumbs you got? 6?', 'You are calling the wrong places - have you looked at the resources to the right of this: http://www.reddit.com/r/SWResources/FWIW - Not deliberately suicidal, but I almost killed myself too at maybe a year older than you, alcoholic/addict - just turned 65.', 'I meant people who might be able to find out her condition. I read your post as implying you didnt know where she was and what she was doing.', 'May help to try to consciously go the substitute route - instead of concentrating on Christmas, which apparently has some (perhaps unrecognized) bad associations for you, think in terms of Festivus or Saturnalia or FSM or such. Two of my kids atheist, Im agnostic (dont have the blind faith needed to support atheism), so we came to terms some years back that theyd get their goodies on their birthdays instead. Still send them secular cards, as off the wall as possible, but thats about it. ', 'Most larger cities have a Crises Center of some kind available, usually in the phone book and these days online. Might be called Suicide Prevention or similar (somewhat of a misnomer, as they can refer non-suicidal but distressed also) that can point to free and/or inexpensive resources. Usually can be found in the Emergency Services area.If there is a University in town can pretty much guarantee theyve got something going on. They can also direct to various self help groups, if any in your area. Many of these are actually quite good, as the people there know the local doctors and such, and point towards those with better reps.', 'Be careful, and Im available.', 'Can kind of identify with bad parents, blamed them for a lot of my stuff, some correctly, some not so much, but I did have to divorce them to survive. They knew what buttons to push, they put them there.You are having a Depressed mood run with friends & lovers - dont have much to offer there, but maybe if you could identify some common threads you might be able to make better associations in the future. Youre bright enough to do so, and they (potential other friends, lovers) are out there.Im an oddball, always have been. Some of that deliberate, much not intentional, but I have major trouble catching friends and such. I found one in particular, but, truth be told, she found, in me, that which I could not see.You might find this depressing, but, even though I wrote it, I dont think most of it is. As difficult as I am for people to Hyperactive behavior - I had 32 years with Bev, a weird person Hyperactive behavior me was able to be with her - [Bev](http://www.reddit.com/r/self/comments/b9jfa/this_is_where_we_can_put_personal_things_and_i/)If I could, so can you.', 'Atheism is no block. I came into AA as a non-too-attentive converted Catholic, and in the course of getting my higher power concepts functional enough to stay sober, learned my agnosticism - or, more simply, AA taught me to be an agnostic. Good luck.

Ideation

You sir have joined reddit making us Hyperactive behavior you more than others by far. I may not be the best at this but... Perhaps a bribe to convince you otherwise would work? I have a couple old steam games i dont play think that would help? In my time of greatest sorrow video games have always been there to cheer me up.', 'Good man, or woman? You have at least a couple hundred hours or more of enjoyment to be found in this. Let me know if you wanna clan up and play along, Ive got about 5 of my friends so far who are going to join :)', 'Dont give up yet man, Diablo 3 was just announced to be out in may. How could you forgive yourself?', 'ah, I truly am an idiot as I didnt really read your username. Im sorry. If you change your mind and create a steam account let me know. Also to Attention Deficit Disorder I think some of us here really do understand how you feel. I went through some bad times resulting in me not caring or talking to anyone. I just wanted my life to end but I was too Social fear to do it myself even. I decided I wouldnt try to take the easy way out then whatever force out there pushing this negativity on me would win. Many years and sad horrible days later here I am. Yes I still get sad sometimes but life has improved significantly and ive learned to see the light in things. Im not saying your situation is at all Hyperactive behavior mine but It took me so many realize I brought it upon myself, I was always constantly looking at the negative aspects of things. You would be amazed what being positive can do for you. ', 'What games did you Hyperactive behavior to play or still currently play? ', 'You dont really want to do it, Its clear you are looking for someone to talk to or you would not be posting this here. You were at one point happy in your life this I know to be true because you said you were married, unhappy people dont tend to get married (for the most part). With that being said you have experienced happiness in your life. What makes you entirely sure that happiness wont be found again? No one can tell the future my friend. Your just looking for the easy way out if you are infact going to do it. I have a proposal for you. Wait, despite how hopeless it feels how horrible shit has been wait. For what you might ask? Many people think the world is going to end by the end of this year. I propose you wait until that time to decide afterall you must have been Depressed mood for years to even consider this, whats 9 more months then? Here are the possible outcomes. 1. In 9 months time you find something life changing and regain your former happiness. 2. You get a front seat to the most amazing apocalyptic show the world has to offer. 3. Nothing has improved in your life and the world keeps turning just as it always had but you at least got to see the look on those suckers faces who threw it all away thinking the world was coming to an end. I never claimed I was good at this nor that I would actually help you but instead I challenge you. Will you deny yourself this one last challenge? This one last good fight.', 'See heres another reason to live, just think about how sexy jen might be and she called you huni, she totally wants you. ', 'You ask for help and possible solutions. In order to help you solve your problem we must first know the problem. Yes youve listed that you have been thinking of Suicide and cutting yourself but where did this all stem from? What are some of the problems or hardships youre facing? You may not believe it but there are billions of people on this planet and on the internet. Some of use have gone through what you have if not worse and understand. If you could present us the problems we could suggest the solutions.', 'You have just fucked my minds pussy with that one. Well done.', 'And anytime you feel the pain, hey Jude, refrainDont carry the world upon your shouldersFor well you know that its a fool who plays it coolBy making his world a little colder', 'damn i must have been a few hours too late.

Supportive

Im feeling pretty emotionally low just now too, so all I can say is -- a lot of life insurance policies wont pay after a Suicide. So just consider that as a practical matter.On a brighter note.. student loan forgiveness is a real idea that might actually happen someday.. you might think about getting involved in organizations that are pushing for it, if you have the energy and time. Other than that all I can do is sympathize. Student debt is awful; Ive been through it too. Money problems are very hard, much harder than people who have never had such problems realize.You are not worthless. Youre trying to get a job. What more can you do? It sounds Hyperactive behavior you are trying really hard and thats farther than many people get. ', 'What makes you think your parents dont Hyperactive behavior you? I know how it is when you start feeling down, and you start to question every positive feeling. Youre not wasting my time, by the way. As for friends in college, I made remarkably few when I was there. It made me feel Hyperactive behavior something was wrong with me. Over time I came to realize that I am the sort of person who does not need a lot of friends. I am quite happy by myself. But when I was in college and surrounded by a lot of people (who werent my friends), it seemed Hyperactive behavior I was doing it wrong. In actuality I was in the wrong place for me. All those people, making friends and doing whatever, that was fine for them. But it wasnt for me. I dont know if youre similar to me, but I shared in case it makes you feel better. College is a weird, short time, and it will come and go Hyperactive behavior the wind. ', 'Where are you studying? In the United States, a lot of people have jobs that arent related to their degrees. But just having a degree makes it easier to get a job of some kind. Not knowing all the circumstances of your situation, I would say that you should try to stick it out. You are not writing the whole book, just this one chapter. What comes after is unknown and full of possibility. In terms of classmates and friends, it seems to me that you need to branch out. You may have been so fixated on your boyfriend that you unconsciously excluded everyone else from your life. Open up a little, and see what happens. Just a smile can really work wonders. Or you could talk to your adviser and see about changing your major. You said you have a scholarship, and those usually have limitations, but maybe you could switch from aerodynamics to, say, math? or chemistry? What do you Hyperactive behavior better? Could you angle your classes in such a way that they are more palatable? I need to go to bed.. I work tomorrow, and I am tired.. but please do PM me if youd Hyperactive behavior to talk further. I hope I helped you, at least a little.', 'About the Suicide hotline--any chance your call was dropped or something? If it wasnt and they hung up on you--thats shitty. Ive only ever called one of those once, and the woman was extremely rude to me. I dont think Id ever call another one of those again. Hopefully my experience is not the norm.About your situation -- It sounds Hyperactive behavior you have some good things to look forward to, Hyperactive behavior the job and the stuff youve wanted to learn. You want to get better and you see a way to do it. On the other hand there is the rifle. My advice to you would be to embrace that good stuff. Get rid of the rifle. Pawn it. Get rid of all guns so they are not a temptation. You have some things going for you--the guy who pushes you in good ways, the job, yoga, cute running partner. Take these as gifts from the universe and build on them. ', 'Did you hate aerodynamics before he broke up with you?', 'Youre a doctor? Wow. That takes dedication. The things you want to do are admirable and would help a lot of people. Is that enough to keep you going? Volunteering is something you could get started with right away, I would think. Then you can work toward the other goals.I used to bake bread every week. Youre right, its peaceful, and theres something really nice about squishing dough in your hands and having it bake into something edible. I gotta go to bed. Ill be thinking about you, though. PM me if youd Hyperactive behavior to talk further. ', 'I can only offer a few ideas-- do you have a phone, and does it have video capability? Could you manage to take a video of your sister lying in the street, or doing something else obviously self-destructive? That might help when the authorities come around. Secondly, do you have a friend you can stay with for a while? There may be places you can go if you dont have a friend--womens shelters, for instance. Are you in Drug abuse school? Do you have a counselor or a good teacher who can offer you advice? How about your dad? (You mentioned "parents", plural.)I know its hard to think of options and solutions when emotions are running so Drug abuse. Try to Sedated state your mind and think over your options. ', 'Suspended doesnt Irritable Mood kicked out! If youre feeling Hyperactive behavior you cant handle school in general, how about taking some (voluntary) time off? Work, save up some money? ', 'Maybe it was a stupid way of me talking about this stuff, "the universe" doing things, I Irritable Mood. Because I dont actually believe in a sentient universe or god or anything Hyperactive behavior that. Anyway, I think most people dont understand just how hard it is to make it in life if you dont fit into this very small box of what is "normal". If you dont have a family, and education, and a healthy mind and body, and a job that pays enough,...all these things.. its just really hard. There are people who overcome, but there are a lot who just cant. The only reason Im still around is basically my dad, who has been a solid rock all my life. If he wasnt around.. hell, Im not sure what Id do. What is the thing you wanted to learn, that you posted about above? ', 'Pretty soon youll be an Respiratory Distress Syndrome, Adult and youll have a lot more control over your life. Things will improve. ', 'Im sure that anything I say will be mediocre at best, but..it will get better. It hurts Hyperactive behavior hell now, but in time it will Chest Pain less. He Chest Pain your heart, and thats grievous, but it will get better. Give yourself some time. Be gentle with yourself. You say you have 2 more years to go. If you find you really cant keep going to school, ask about a postponement of school or something. Take some time off and go back when youre ready. Or take a vacation. Go home for a while. You say you cant even kill yourself--this is very natural; it is a hard thing to do. We are genetically programmed to want to survive. And Ache is unpleasant. Overall, just be gentle with yourself and give yourself some time. ', 'As you get older you will have more options, and things will get better. Youll get out of your parents home. You wont have to be around the bullies at school. Just try to hang on for a little while longer. Youre already 17 so you dont have long to go. Keep your sights on the day when you can leave the crap behind. It will come. Make your plans and work toward them. I hope this doesnt sound preachy. Middle and Drug abuse school are lousy times for a lot of people, including myself. Believe me when I say that there is life after these times.. a lot of life. ', 'Im completely new to this subreddit, but as only one other person has commented, Ill post something. My friend, maybe youre thinking too far ahead. Just think about what you can do today, and perhaps tomorrow, to improve your situation. You already made one step (by going to work out). How are you feeling now?

Supportive

Not really, no one really knows.. ', '/r/raisedbynarcissists please come over here for support. ', 'Thank you for this. ', 'Thank you so much, I may message you later..', 'Ha. This is my god damn *life*. No hobbies. No friends. No skills. Abusive home. I want out so badly. ', 'do you even feel empathy..? ', 'Please dont give up, and yes I miss my pets. My very old cat sadly died of cancer recently and I kinda didnt know what to do with myself after..

Ideation

I am going to be straight with you, I have never considered Suicide once and I have no real interpretation of how people feel when they are suicidal. However what I see is that people who are suicidal are looking to far in the future. You want to kill yourself because you cannot see yourself living another day in your condition. My advice to you is find a different perspective instead of seeing yourself in the future think of yourself simply being. Think about your connection to the universe and nature. And the best way to obtain the perspective is through meditation where you can truly find your inner being and happiness.', 'If youre Exhaustion of what your doing change what your doing. Not enough people absorb the full capability of live. We were born with amazing senses, when I feel Stress I slow myself down and just absorb. I focus on my ears and hear every sound feel everything touching my body, and see all the different forms of light moving through my eyes. It clears my mind, slow down my heart and truly makes me appreciate life.

Supportive

Some others you might enjoy:[The Church - Under the Milky Way](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C_Z48dHFYLc)And my personal favorite considering the situation youre in right now:[Sink Florida, Sink by Against Me](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sq-ZLrsl7rU)Ive been that guy before. Socially awkward, amazing girlfriend, break-up because I thought I wanted something different. . .10 years later, Ive learned a lot of lessons the hard way, but one of the more important ones is that life is full of change and as it turns out I did want something different. Im actually still good friends with my high-school gf (after many years of NOT being friends), and the woman I married shares many similar traits to that first serious gf, but she also has qualities that I didnt even know Id want or need in a partner.It sounds Hyperactive behavior youve learned a valuable lesson. Be well', 'Honestly, were it not for my children I certainly would have committed Suicide by now. ', 'I failed out of Chiropractic School 4 months before starting my clinical rotations. Another year and Id have been done. Everyone I was in school with is now graduated and practicing, and you know what? I actually enjoy my current job far far better than any chiropractor I know. They make more money than I do, but I love what I do, and its a path I never would have taken had I not failed out of school.If you failed out of school then there was something fundamental that didnt fit with you. Either you arent ready, or it isnt something you need to be doing right now, focus on opening yourself up to something new and go kick some ass!

Ideation